A1969: a chance to update is a golden opportunity!
Sango: -drags in an unconscious Miroku- where did you get that saying?
A1969: made it up…what did you do to Miroku?
Sango: what does it look like? I beat him up!
A1969: I take it you found him in that club?
Sango: -nods-
A1969: talk about domestic violence…anyway, thanks to those who actually bothered to listen to my pleas of "review please!"

Chapter Twenty-eight: Memories and Tears

XoXoXo

The phone was ringing.

Helen stared at it, wondering if she should answer it or ignore it. She sighed, stood up and approached the attention-seeking device. It might just be her friends, she reasoned. Still, it wasn't like them to call after visiting. Sighing to herself, she picked it up.

"Hello?" she said in a pretend-tired voice.

"Hey, Helen." Her heart skipped a beat when she recognized the voice on the phone.

"T-todd Clark?" she stammered. Todd was the school's resident cutie. Athletic, brilliant and charming, almost all the girls in school were in love with them—Helen included. At least…that was before she met Sesshoumaru. If she hadn't met Sesshoumaru, this moment would have burned itself forever in her mind and in her soul. Unfortunately…her feelings for Todd had long since evaporated.

"Yeah…hi," he said, somewhat timidly.

"Erm…hi," she said, wondering why he hadn't bothered to call her before he had left for Japan and had met Sesshoumaru.

"Yeah so…you're probably wondering why I called," he began, sounding nervous and unsure. "Well…it's just that…I heard you got back from Japan and I was wondering…if you aren't too busy tomorrow…maybe you'd like to grab some lunch with me?"

If she hadn't met Sesshoumaru, she might have covered the mouthpiece and screamed for all the world to hear; if she hadn't met Sesshoumaru, she might have immediately said 'yes' without as much as hesitating; if she hadn't met Sesshoumaru, she might have fainted on the spot; if she hadn't met Sesshoumaru, she might have thought that she had died and gone to heaven…

She inwardly sighed. She didn't want to go out with Todd—not anymore, at least. She was about to tell him so, when it occurred to her that maybe, this was one way to get Sesshoumaru out of her mind. It also occurred to her that maybe, Todd was the surprise her friends had told her about.

"I'd love to," she said.

"Terrific! I'll pick you up at eleven thirty!" Todd said excitedly and hung up.

Helen stared at the receiver in her hand and sighed. She put down the phone and decided to go to bed, hoping that she wouldn't dream about Sesshoumaru tonight.

XoXoXo

"The line's busy," Kagome muttered to an aggravated demon lord. Her grandpa had been reluctant to let Sesshoumaru into the house without purifying him but after assuring him that he meant no harm—("Yeah, right," Inuyasha had snorted)—the old man yielded. And now, the line was busy—how many other things could aggravate a demon lord?

"What do you mean miko?" Sesshoumaru asked with annoyance, letting his cold mask drop briefly to reveal the annoyance written all over his face.

"I mean, either, someone's using the phone at her end or she's the one using it," Kagome said flatly, noticing his annoyance.

Inuyasha noticed it too. "Never thought I'd live to see the day you would go through all this trouble just for one girl," he said smugly, leaning against the wall with his arms folded across his chest.

Sesshoumaru put his cold mask back on. "As I have said," he began, glaring at his brother, "it is Lady Shinsuke's request that I bring her back—personally I do not care if she does not return."

Kagome rolled her eyes as she dialed he number again. "Aha!" she said with triumph as she heard a ringing tone. "It's ringing!"

She heard someone pick up the line. "Hello?" To Kagome's disappointment, it was her Aunt Hsia who answered.

"Oh…um…hi, Aunt H.," Kagome said. She, like Helen, called her cousin's mother 'Aunt H'. It was something they both laughed at sometimes.

"Oh! Kagome, dear! How are you? And everyone else, for that matter?" her aunt asked, sounding pleased.

"We're all fine," Kagome assured her, knowing that if she didn't speak soon, her aunt would launch into a ten hour chat. "I was wondering if Helen's there already."

Sesshoumaru, who had been busy giving Inuyasha looks of purest loathing, snapped his head in Kagome's direction.

"She's arrived, dear," her aunt said. "Just this morning actually."

"Oh, erm, sorry to disturb you at this time of night," Kagome said, glancing at the clock and realizing that it must be quite late in America. "But…I was wondering…can I talk to Helen? It's very important, you see."

Hsia wondered if Kagome knew something about Helen's true mother then decided not to ask. "She's asleep, dear," she said apologetically. "She was tired when she arrived…can I get a message instead?"

Kagome's heart sank. "Um…are you sure she's really asleep? It's really important that I speak to her," she implored.

"I'm sorry, Kagome, but she's very tired," her aunt said.

"Just one moment." Kagome covered the mouthpiece and turned to Sesshoumaru. "She can't talk right now."

"Why?"

"She's asleep."

Sesshoumaru raised a delicate eyebrow at her. "Then wake her up."

Kagome groaned. Stupid jerk, she thought as she uncovered the mouthpiece. "Um…Aunt H…can't you really wake her up?"

"I'm sorry, Kagome, I can't…she's so tired, she's snoring," her aunt said flatly.

Kagome chuckled. "Okay…just tell her that Inu baka wanted to talk to her." With that, she hung up and turned to Sesshoumaru. "I'm sorry…her adopted mother won't wake her. She's very tired, you see."

Sesshoumaru stared at her for a long moment and Kagome wondered if he was going to order her to call Helen again. But to her surprise, Sesshoumaru turned and left the house, heading for the Well Shrine. Kagome blinked at his retreating back. "Wow…you're welcome," she said sarcastically.

"Keh," Inuyasha said with disgust. "Don't expect to hear a word of thanks from him, Kagome."

The miko sighed. "I just thought that maybe Helen changed him, that's all."

"Changed him?" Inuyasha said incredulously. "The moment that happens, I'll eat my shoe!"

"You're not wearing any," Kagome pointed out.

Inuyasha pouted and turned away.

XoXoXo

"Will you not eat, milady?" Chihiro, Shinsuke's head maid, asked. She was a kind humanoid youkai with green hair tied up in a bun, befitting her station.

"No, Chihiro, take it away," Shinsuke ordered, dismissing the plates of food in front of her with a wave of one hand.

"As you wish, milady." Chihiro motioned for the other maids to come and take away the plates of untouched food. They sighed as they took them away. Lady Shinsuke had refused to eat a single morsel since her daughter had left.

"Do you not think that this is disturbing?" Yori, another maid, asked as she passed Chihiro. Lady Shinsuke was out of earshot by then.

"Oh, yes," she replied stiffly. "I think it is…But our Lady should not let herself go even if her daughter has left…she has other things to occupy her such as watching over the land, for instance."

"True," another maid replied. "Still…If my daughter had left…I would certainly mope and brood."

XoXoXo

Sesshoumaru frowned as he leapt out of the well and into the Sengoku Jidai. He looked at his surroundings and leaned against the well, folding his arms across his chest, frowning. Why, he asked himself, did he feel so down? So, what if the girl was gone for good? Not that he should care about her.

He was never the type of person to show any kind of affection for someone, which was why, he reflected, their relationship with Kagura was…dry.

But this girl was different.

Why couldn't he get her out of his mind? He was supposed to be impervious to these kinds of trifles. He had built a secure dam around his emotions, put on a stoic mask and vowed that power was the only thing he would care about.

What was going on?

He didn't love Helen, he thought. Still…why did he feel as if something was just out of place since she left? Maybe he…

No, he thought, banishing the thought from his mind. He was not like his loving father, he was not weak. He was not like Inuyasha—foolish enough to love a miko who, in the end, sealed him to a tree. No, he was different.

He let a sigh escape his lips as he left the forest to search for Rin and Jaken.

XoXoXo

Helen woke up to see sunlight stream across her bedroom. She sighed, remembering that she was no longer in Feudal Japan. She kicked the sheets off her, sat up, and yawned. She had been given her wish—she hadn't dreamt about Sesshoumaru.

She sighed as she took a quick shower and bounded downstairs for breakfast to find her mother sitting at the table, reading the newspaper and at the same time, sipping coffee with her little finger sticking out. "Morning, mom," she said, giving her mother a kiss on the cheek. She sat down opposite her mother and immediately piled eggs on to her plate.

Her mother put the newspaper away. "Good morning, too, dear," she said pleasantly. "Oh! By the way, Kagome called last night."

Helen, whose spoon was halfway to her mouth, stared at her mother in surprise. "Wh-what? What did she say?" she asked automatically. Her spoon seemed suspended in midair, egg yoke dripped from her spoon to her plate.

"She was a bit vague," her mother said, burying her face in the newspaper again. "She kept saying that she wanted to talk to you, but I told her you were asleep"—Helen groaned, cursing sleep—"still, she kept on insisting that she talk to you personally—said she had something important to tell you."

"Did she—did she leave any messages for me?" Helen asked.

Her mother paused for a moment. "Oh, yes, I nearly forgot," she said with an apologetic smile. "She said someone called 'Inu Baka' wanted to talk to you."

Helen's eyes widened. "Oh," she said through a strangled voice. Sesshoumaru had wanted to talk to her! Last night! While she had been asleep! Disbelief coursed through her. Why did he want to talk to her? She sensed the tears form in her eyes once more. She left the room without bothering to finish her breakfast, without bothering to answer her mother.

She ran to her room and slammed the door shut. She threw herself on the bed and choked back the tears. Why did he call her? What did he want to talk to her? She bit her lip, trying to divert her thoughts elsewhere—she was thankful then, that the phone rang once again.

She froze, though. What if it was Kagome again? She began chewing her lower lip. The phone rang again…and again. She was afraid to answer to answer it.

"Helen!" her mother called out. "Andrea's calling you!" Her mother had answered the phone.

Helen breathed a sigh of relief. She quickly hopped off the bed and picked up the phone. "Hello?" she said breathlessly.

"Hey, Helen!" Andrea said with a giggle. She was so bubbly; she didn't notice that slightly choked-up tone in Helen's voice.

"Hi…" Helen said weakly.

"Hm? You sound groggy—did you just wake up?" Andrea asked,

"Yeah," Helen lied, "anyway—"

Andrea interrupted her. "Oooo! I nearly forgot! Did he call you?" She giggled.

Helen narrowed her eyes at nothing, trying to banish Sesshoumaru from her head. "Yes," she said quietly. "Todd called me…He was your 'surprise,' wasn't he?"

Her friend giggled. "Yup! You know, we were ever so surprised when he walked right up to us and admitted that he liked you!"

Helen sighed. If only Todd had told her that he liked her before she left for Japan…Maybe he would have been the one. Too bad I don't like him anymore, she thought, still trying to banish Sesshoumaru from her mind but to no avail. "So…what did he say?" Andrea prodded. She sounded delighted and giddy—exactly the opposite of what Helen was feeling right now.

"Oh…um…he…asked me out…to lunch," she said in a dead hollow sort of voice that Andrea failed to notice. The moment she let the words out, her friend shrieked with giddiness on the other line. Helen held the receiver a foot away as Andrea's shrieks of delight came.

"Really?" she asked once her shrieking had died down. "Ooo!! I'm so happy for you! Wait till I tell Emily and the others!" With that, she promptly hung up.

Helen stared at the receiver, her eyebrows raised. Trust Andrea to act like this. She sighed and returned the receiver, her thoughts mulling over in her mind as she sighed.

XoXoXo

"So what did Sesshoumaru want?" Sango asked as soon as Inuyasha and Kagome returned to the spot where they had left them. She was sitting next to Miroku, Kohaku in between them. Shippou was mounted on Miroku's shoulder.

"He wanted to find a way to get Helen back," Kagome said with a shrug as they approached.

"Keh," was all Inuyasha could say.

"He seems to like her," Sango pointed out.

Kagome nodded. "I get the gut feeling that he does."

"Sheesh, Kagome," Inuyasha said with annoyance. "I already told you that Sesshoumaru's not the type to go chasing after women…He said he was there on Lady Shinsuke's orders—and that's it."

Kagome rolled her eyes. "What if that was just an excuse?"

"Sheesh," Inuyasha said, rolling his eyes. "I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times—he doesn't like her…and if he does, I'll eat my Tessaiga." He turned to everyone else. "Now get your lazy butts off the ground and let's get going!"

XoXoXo

Helen glanced at the clock on the wall—ten thirty. An hour from now, Todd would pick her up. Maybe I should just say I'm sick…she thought as she rolled over on her bed, sighing. She suddenly sat bolt right up. Oh no! Just because…I still can't get that stupid cur outta my head doesn't mean I have to mope and cry like some…like some…like some lovesick lunatic! No! I am getting out of this bed, I am meeting up with Todd and I'll forget that cold-hearted, self-centered, arrogant jerk!

She hopped out of bed, took a quick shower and changed into a pair of simple white jeans, a red halter top and a pair of white doll shoes. She sighed again. Ages ago, she would have put more effort into her clothes but now, it seemed so…

Unnecessary.

Sighing again, she went downstairs to wait for Todd. "Looks like someone's going somewhere," her mom said, entering the living room where Helen was looking out the window, at the forest.

"Oh, um…" Helen turned to her mother. "I have a date."

Her mother chuckled. She was holding a glass of iced tea in her hands. "You've just come back from Japan…a date so soon?" she asked. She suddenly frowned. "I thought you liked someone there…what was his name? Sesshoumaru, right?"

Helen closed her eyes. "No…I don't like him…" she said in a hollow sort voice. She tried to sound more cheerful, but her mother saw through it.

"You don't have to lie to me, Helen," she said quietly, taking a sip of her iced tea.

Helen's eyes slightly widened. She was about to open her mouth to say something but, at that moment, the doorbell rang. "That's Todd," Helen muttered. She turned to her mother. "See you soon, mom!"

Hsia watched as her daughter left, looking a lot less cheerful than she had been in her life.

XoXoXo

Rin looked up as her adopted father come into view. She and Jaken had waited for Sesshoumaru to come back; in truth, Rin was hoping that the moment he did come back, he would bring Helen with him—to her dismay, he had not.

Jaken did not bother to ask where his lord had been; he knew that Sesshoumaru would either ignore him or tell him to mind his own business. To their surprise, Sesshoumaru merely walked past them with a slight glance at Rin to make sure she was safe and continued walking on.

"Where are you going, Lord Sesshoumaru?" Jaken asked, perplexed at his lord's sudden comings and goings.

"Somewhere to think," Sesshoumaru said, disappearing into the forest.

Rin and Jaken looked at each other and shrugged.

Sesshoumaru continued walking until he came to a cliff that overlooked a valley. A mild breeze blew around him, comforting and cooling. It was the ideal place to think—something Sesshoumaru wanted to do. He let a small sigh escape him. He couldn't get her out of his head and he didn't know why. He felt sure that he didn't love her—he was only interested in power, he told himself for the ten millionth time that day. Still, why did she manage to invade every thought that he had?

Perhaps it was the fact that she had left without a single word. So what if she had left without telling him? He didn't care, he told himself. Still, why did she leave? There was no reason to, no reason at all…

"Funny," a silent voice said, smooth as silk, behind him. "I didn't expect you to be the type to brood."

Sesshoumaru glanced calmly over his shoulder. Toshimaru was leaning against a nearby tree, arms folded smugly across his chest, giving his cousin an upraising look. He had snuck up on his cousin, why, Sesshoumaru didn't know.

"What are you doing here?" Sesshoumaru asked, turning his attention away. It was a long way from the Northern Lands and he wondered what business his cousin had for coming such a long way.

"Merely watching you," Toshimaru replied curtly. "I have never seen you this…saddened about a young lady before."

"Saddened?" Sesshoumaru snarled as he rounded on his cousin. Others would have quailed and pleaded for their lives, but Toshimaru kept a calm face and an equally calm manner. "You think that I am saddened at her leaving?"

"She was crying, you know," Toshimaru said quietly. "Before she left, I ran into her—she was crying."

Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow at him. He had never known about that. "Anyway," Toshimaru went on, not noticing the look in his cousin's eyes. "I have two things I wish to discuss with you, dear cousin."

"Such as?"

"Perhaps it would please you to know that Lady Shinsuke and your mother have both talked about it," Toshimaru said. "And they think it best to…call off your betrothal."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrows shot up in surprise. He didn't expect Toshimaru to tell him that. He should feel relieved, instead, he felt…he didn't know what he felt. "So?" Sesshoumaru asked, plainly stating that he didn't care at all.

"I wish to ask you…do you harbor any feelings akin to love for her?" he asked bluntly.

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes at him. "No…why?" he asked, though he had a feeling that he already knew the answer.

"No particular reason, dearest cousin," Toshimaru said lightly.

"You came all the way from the Northern Lands just to tell me that?" Sesshoumaru asked, trying not to sound incredulous.

Toshimaru tilted his head and actually gave him a mocking smile. He walked past Sesshoumaru to stand on the very edge of the cliff and Sesshoumaru resisted the temptation to push him off. Toshimaru turned to him. "Perhaps, dear cousin, perhaps." He shrugged at Sesshoumaru; the youkai lord watched as his cousin's form flickered and a moment later, a giant black dog bounded into the air, flying away, where, Sesshoumaru didn't know.

He sighed as the wind rustled around him. He turned to leave to return to Rin and Jaken, repeating their brief conversation with Toshimaru in his mind.

XoXoXo

Helen took a sip of her soda and sighed. She and Todd were eating at McDonald's; Todd had been nothing but charming towards her and she could easily see that he liked her—too bad she liked someone else.

"So, Helen," Todd began awkwardly. "What was Japan like?"

Helen blinked then turned to him. "What? Oh! Japan! It was fantastic! It was…" her voice trailed off. Thinking about Japan made her think about its Feudal counterpart, something she didn't want to do on a date.

"You know, when you left, I just felt a bit awful," Todd went on, not noticing Helen's discomfort. "'Cause I wasn't able to tell you how I really felt"—he actually blushed—"but when you unexpectedly came back…I felt happy! Then I asked your friends for a little help."

"Hmm…"

They finished eating in stony silence and made their way out of the restaurant. "So, where do you wanna go?" Todd asked after a long silence.

"Anywhere is fine with me," Helen said with a shrug.

Todd beamed at her. "Okay…is it alright if we check up on my little sister first? I know, I know, lame, but I promised my mom I'd check up on her—they're practicing for a play, you see."

Helen nodded and gave him a smile. "No problem."

They made their way to the school auditorium which was always opened since the town found it more convenient to do activities there than anywhere else. They made their way in and Helen couldn't help but smile at what she saw. Little kids—ages five to eight—were standing on the stage. They wore colored costumes and were chattering away, not listening to the exasperated-looking teacher who was trying, in vain, to keep them in line.

"Now, children!" she was saying. "Please return to your places and—"

"Hey, miss Delson!" Todd called out. Friendly and athletic, he always managed to charm the teachers, how he did it, no one knew.

The tired teacher turned to him. "Oh, Todd, Helen!" she said brightly. "What brings you two here?"

"Come to see my little sister," Todd said with a shrug.

Miss Delson nodded. "Of course…you were always obedient, Todd." She turned to the children. "Claire, you have a visitor!"

"Big brother!" Helen watched as a dark haired girl of seven or eight ran down the stage steps and towards her. Her chocolate brown eyes sparkled with glee and, much to Helen's dismay, she reminded the young woman of Rin.

"Hey, Claire," Todd said. He turned to Helen. "I'd like you to meet a friend of mine, this is Helen."

Helen smiled weakly at the child. Really, how was she going to forget Sesshoumaru when this little girl nearly resembled his ward?

"Hi, Helen," Claire said with a toothy grin. She turned to her big brother. "Toddy"—Helen stifled a giggle—"I can't stand it anymore!" she whined.

Todd knelt down so that they were eye to eye. "Stand what?"

"Being in the stupid play! I don't know why mom made me…I told her I didn't want to!" she said with an adorable pout.

"But…you like acting, right?"

"No, I don't! I just said I loved watching plays…not acting in them!" The little girl looked indignant.

"What is it that you don't like anyway?" Helen asked gently.

Claire sighed. "I don't like not knowing where I belong!" she said huffily. "I mean…Miss Delson says that I should stand there"—she pointed to a corner on the stage—"then she says that she's wrong then she makes me stand there"—she pointed in the center—"it's confusing! She's been doing that for three days now!"

Todd chuckled heartily. "Well, Claire, you will just have to cope with not knowing where you belong," he said simply.

Helen's eyes widened. Those words…where had she heard them before?

Sesshoumaru looked at her for a moment. "Do you wish to return to your own time?"

She looked at him. "My own time…?"-She gave him a small sad smile-"I do not know where I belong anymore."

Sesshoumaru stood up and walked towards the door. "Well, Helen, you will just have to cope with not knowing where you belong."

Helen closed her eyes. Yes, those words…They were Sesshoumaru's words…Her mind suddenly began to remember everything…

She remembered moping up his wounds after Inuyasha and the others had attacked him in retaliation for his having harmed her…

She and Toshimaru were about to kiss when the old log that they were sitting on split…
"Well, well, well."

Helen and Toshimaru looked up. Sesshoumaru was raising a delicate eyebrow at them both.

Toshimaru stood up and helped Helen to her feet. "Cousin! May I ask why you are here?"

Sesshoumaru glared at him. "Lady Shinsuke invited me here."

Helen looked at him. Had he seen their near kiss?

Sesshoumaru's eyes suddenly snapped to hers and she blinked at him. He suddenly grabbed her wrist and pulled her away from his cousin.

"Hey!" she said as the youkai lord pulled her away.

"Where are you taking her?" Toshimaru's voice called after them. Sesshoumaru glared at his cousin from over his shoulder.

"She is my betrothed and I make take her wherever I wish."

He had saved her from the vampire, Yamimaru…
"You…beat him," Helen said slowly, unsure whether she should thank him or try to hide her blushes in the dark.

"He was weak," Sesshoumaru said calmly. He turned on his heel and began walking off. Helen looked at his retreating back, unsure whether she should follow him or not.

Sesshoumaru stopped and sensed that the young lady was hesitant. "Helen," he called. "If you refuse to hurry, then I shall leave you."

She had begged him to restore Sango's life with the Tenseiga…
"Hey, Sesshoumaru," she began in a low voice. He glanced sideways at her. "Um…what you did for Sango and Miroku…that was pretty kind of you…" her voice trailed off.

"I did not do it for them," he said indifferently.

Helen raised an eyebrow. "Then why did you save Sango?"

"I did it for you."

"Helen, why are you crying?" Todd's voice snapped Helen out of her jumble of memories.

Helen looked at him; there were tears in her eyes. "Um…I just…I gotta go, Todd, I'll see you soon!" she said as she ran out the auditorium. She heard Todd calling after her, but she ignored him. She wiped the tears from her eyes as she ran back towards her home. Why? she thought as she ran up the driveway. Why is it so painful? Why do I have to feel this?

Her mother, who was reading in the living room, looked up just in time to see Helen burst through the door. "My, my, you're early," Hsia commented. She stopped when she saw the tears in her daughter's eyes. "Helen…is anything wrong?"

Helen didn't bother to answer as she ran up to her room and slammed the door shut behind her. Once she was safely inside her room, she leaned against the closed door and didn't bother to stop the tears from falling. I thought I could run away from him, she thought miserably as she threw herself on the bed. But…I can't! I can't run away from him! I…love him…

She buried her face in her pillow and cried.

XoXoXo

A1969: done at last. Whew! That was long…
Sango: true.
A1969: Once again, I'd like to thank those who bothered to review! Thanks guys, those reviews served as a source of inspiration!