A/N: Please keep in mind that when talking about both Tim and Gibbs - we have stubbornness and stocism to deal with. There will be no 'easy out' with them.

- so PLEASE don't roast the author if this chapter doesn't pan out the way some of you are expecting.

Now, having said that - shall we see where this goes?

Six O'clock arrives long before the blissfully relaxing couple is ready for it. With great reluctance, they climb off the couch and together, walk naked through the apartment, Tim veering off to his bedroom for a change of clothes while Ziva hits the head first. Sharing a kiss as they pass in the hallway a few moments later, neither can stop smiling, even as they face the plans for the evening.

As Tim showers, Ziva places a phone call to Tony, letting him know that the dinner he's wanting to have with her and Tim will have to wait yet again. She's sure the Senior Field Agent will understand and actually looks forward to when they will be able to sit down together. It's a conversation she's longing to have – just the three of them away from work and dealing with their friendship.

Just as she expected, Tony quickly agrees to the change in plans and even offers to still take her to dinner. She politely refuses, citing other plans for the evening. As the call ends, both are still feeling good about the new planned dinner; now scheduled for the following night at six.

She can't help but smile at this small piece of positive stuffed inside a very large piece of negative that is Tim's leaving. She'll never admit it to Tim, but Ziva can only hold onto every shred of good, in hopes of not drowning in the bad. For so long as she can help it, he will not be made to feel the slightest bit guilty about the path his career has taken him. They will be fine and she will accept no other possibilities. While she still has him within reach, she plans on spending every possible moment building on their relationship.

Freshly showered and changed into comfortable jeans and not quite casual button up shirt, Tim already has his wallet and keys in hand as he steps into the kitchen and kisses her on the cheek, disrupting her thoughts. "I shouldn't be too long."

With a soft smile, she works to reassure him. "Do not worry about the time it takes. Let it just happen while you do what you need to do to stay true to yourself. I will be here when you get back and your dinner will still be warm."

A solemn look on his face, Tim asks her. "What did I ever do to deserve you?"

Without batting an eye, Ziva steps into his personal space and hugs him as she returns the heartfelt compliment. "Whatever it was that I have done to deserve you, Tim."

Wrapping her up in his arms around her and pulling her even closer, he whispers in her ear. "Thank you."

Easing herself back, she kisses him on the cheek, knowing if she places that kiss on his mouth, he won't be leaving anytime soon. "Go on. Talk with Gibbs."

Swallowing hard, Tim nods and scoops up his phone as he heads out, no further words needing to be said.

******NCIS*****

Gibbs shifts uncomfortably in his chair for the countless time as he struggles to keep his mind on the book he's reading. What did that last page say? He can't concentrate. Looking at his watch, he's not surprised to find the afternoon has passed and the appointed hour has nearly arrived. Picking up his wallet and keys, he's out the door and in his car before any more time has passed.

Settling into the booth at the diner as his favorite waitress brings him a cup and a carafe of coffee, he can't help but admit to himself that he's nervous. He's pushed Tim to come and talk with him about everything the younger man was subjected to back when he was still a newbie on the team. But now that Tim's agreed – Gibbs finds that he's clueless as to where to start them off or even how. Talking has never been easy for him; especially with the equally stubborn and tight-lipped younger man he's long underestimated and basically ignored. This in-depth talking is certainly not something he's ever practiced beforehand or given that much thought to ahead of time. This time though – this time is different because, as Vance so accurately pointed out – time is running out for the Team Leader to get it right.

Before he can think about it any longer, the sight of Tim pulling into the parking lot garners his attention and he watches as the younger man parks and gets out of his car. Remaining in place, Tim breathes deeply, slowly letting it back out before he walks to the door of the diner and comes inside. Picking up his coffee cup, Gibbs relishes the protection drinking from it gives him for that first moment, at least.

Taking another deep sip of his coffee, Gibbs lets his eyes drop to the table as Tim settles into the seat across from him, greeting him quietly. "Hi."

"Tim." Gibbs' quiet greeting isn't the gruff one he usually throws out there but it's not anything beyond what Tim's heard on occasion either.

All things almost seem normal between them, with the glaring exception, of course, of the fact that they're sitting down together to have a personal conversation in the first place. Just as before, there's a second cup on the table just waiting for Tim and the young man wordlessly busies himself fixing his coffee the way he likes it. But this time, as the waitress approaches to give them the menus, both of them offer her a slight shake of the head since neither is interested in eating right now.

As she turns and heads in the direction of her other customers, Tim sits back and sighs while his eyes move up to meet those of the man across from him. "I'm still not sure we need to do this."

"I can see that." Gibbs offers with a tone that can almost be called sympathetic. "I haven't seen you looking this tense in a long time. Let's just get it all out there so it's not hanging on any longer?"

Taking a minute to infuse himself with much needed caffeine, Tim finally sets the cup down but he can't hide the frown as he forces his mind back down memory lane. "Where do I start: the countless times Tony tricked me into throwing my lunch away or the superglue incidents that you never put a stop to. I never understood your expectations about that – what was it you asked me? Oh, yeah. – 'are you ever gonna learn?' "

"The stuff's invisible and there was never any rhyme or reason for when he chose to use it, Gibbs! Just what was it exactly I was supposed to learn? That's one of those great mystery's I've never figured out. The only thing I did learn - was that you didn't give a damn what he did to me." Tim's voice has risen a notch with clear traces of residual hurt and anger. Shaking his head as he works to steady his breathing, he clenches his fists in his lap. "Damn it. No. I don't want to do this now." He's extremely upset that he's become so angry so quickly. This wasn't supposed to happen.

Stunned, Gibbs can only watch in shocked silence as the young man across from him picks up his coffee cup with shaking hands and eyes glued to his cup as he takes a long drawn out drink, as if needing it to stay alive. The Team Leader hasn't felt this sucker punched since Vance told him Tim was being transferred. But this; this is different because this is his own doing.

Still he has to keep pushing – for Tim's sake – and his own. They need to get this mess out into the open before Tim leaves. It's too important to let Tim get sucked up into the hurt to the point that he quits trying to air it out. "Tim. I wouldn't have asked you to do this if it weren't important. "Gibbs deliberately keeps his voice calm and quiet, despite the effect Tim's words and obvious anger are having on him.

Remaining safely behind his cup of coffee, Tim drinks every bit of it down and sets the cup back down, mentally schooling his emotions back in line so he can shove them back under lock and key. Without saying a word he fixes himself a second cup of fortifying brew, his hands wrapping around the cup like a pair of vices now, while his eyes remain fixed on the creamy hot liquid inside of it. He absolutely hates that this conversation has tapped into long buried emotions and memories.

Suddenly, from seemingly out of nowhere comes a lifeline in the form of Ziva's words of encouragement, spoken just a short few hours ago.

"…do what you need to do to stay true to yourself."

The unexpected arrival of the memory of spoken words that have led him to this point in the first place soon fill his head.

"I'm a father, Agent McGee. I know pain when I see it, even when the truth isn't what you're telling yourself. He may not have treated you fairly and he may have shortchanged you in a lot of ways but he's been important to you for a long time. That's not something we can just leave behind without scarring. No matter how much we want to."

"Trust me, son. It'll stay with you unless you fix it. Life's too short to carry that kind of baggage everywhere you go."

Tim's eyes close for a brief moment against the onslaught. Right now he doesn't see how he can fulfill their faith in him because this just hurts too damned much. He's never been one to enjoy hurting others and knowing that this will hurt the others on what used to be his team – more now since they've matured and grown , then way back when it all happened – just makes this that much more painful to rip open.

Gibbs watches as the plethora of emotions flicker through the younger man's eyes before he briefly closes them. He knows that he's deliberately poking a hornet's nest here and seriously wishes with everything within him that he didn't have to be. Even as he considers putting a stop to this, the words that brought him here – brought the both of them here – come back to him most vividly.

"…If he leaves without hearing from you whatever it is that needs to be said, that bridge will be burned and both of you deserve better."

"You said so yourself, Gibbs. Being reassigned didn't put that look on his face."

With a bone deep sigh, Gibbs gives up the idea of letting this go. Somehow, he'll make this right – help Tim work through this minefield. He has to because he owes it to him. What's more, he wants to. He wants to help this young man he's long considered to be his surrogate son- even if he was too stubborn and mean to treat him like it – get to the root of it all – so it can be cleaned out and healed. It doesn't help that there are much bigger transgressions mixed in with all of this – transgressions that no one else is responsible for except Gibbs.

Hell, Gibbs, if you had done your job, your team could be put back together – IF they wanted to be – with your retirement in play in the near future – they all could have moved up – and continued working together

Grimacing at the still brutally painful truth from Vance, Gibbs can barely sit still. In fact – he can't stay still any longer. Getting to his feet, he hits the door of the diner without looking back, his tension filled stride taking him beyond the parking lot to the grassy area that he's pacing before he can even stop to think he's just left Tim behind to take this sudden change however his brain might interpret it.

Left behind, Tim is reeling as he sits back with a sigh and closes his eyes. He will NOT feel guilty for speaking the truth! The man asked for this expedition down memory lane! Opening his eyes once more, Tim sighs and motions for the waitress to bring him another pot of coffee. When she reaches the table, he quietly asks her for two 'to-go' cups with lids.

Once the cups have been brought and the obviously concerned waitress has been reassured with a soft smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes, Tim fixes himself yet another cup of coffee. This time he takes the time to relish it; savoring every sip and the warmth it fills him with. He won't rush this situation. Whatever it is that's running through Gibbs' mind right now isn't for Tim to figure out.

Still, when ten minutes quickly become fifteen with no sign of Gibbs' pacing letting up, Tim feels a wave of defeat crash through him. Why hadn't anyone listened to him about this? He knew this was a bad idea from the get-go. The man wanted the truth but obviously can't figure out what to do with it now that it's been handed to him

Well, Tim has better things to do with his time than sit here and wait for Gibbs to figure this out. He's losing precious time with Ziva for this and that's not okay with him. Pouring two cups of coffee to go, Tim puts the lids on, leaves money on the table for the waitress' trouble and heads out.

Approaching the still pacing man, Tim clears his throat. "Thought you could use this before I go."

Gibbs pacing amidst his frustratingly chaotic and endlessly looping thoughts immediately freezes as he pins his agent with a piercing look of surprise. Once the words and the accompanying visual of the cup of coffee in Tim's hand have registered, the man is quick to approach him and quietly accept the cup from him with a subdued "Thanks."

Tim nods but lets it go so he can turn this to where he needs it to go. "I'm gonna head out. It's obvious this isn't a good idea."

Now realizing he's done nothing but make the situation worse, Gibbs can't hide the guilt and regret from his expression or his tone. "Tim…"

Shaking his head slightly, Tim lets him off the hook for now. "It's fine. We both knew this could happen. And I think we both need time to rethink this." The unspoken message that now that the stopper's been pulled from the bottle, it will all come out somehow in the end -as Gibbs wanted – remains almost tangible in the air between them.

Nodding. Gibbs can only agree. "Okay. "

Turning to walk away; Tim's taken all of six steps when the older man calls him back. "McGee!"

Reluctantly, Tim turns to face him again. He hates that the man is using his last name like this – wishes that's a habit he would break; thought he had months ago, but then again, he's leaving so, what does it matter, right? Silently he waits to hear what's on his former Team Leader's mind. Watching him approach him adds to the weight of the lump in his throat.

With unbridled concern strewn across his face, Gibbs stops jut inches from him before he speaks. "Not your fault." He knows that Tim knows that but he wants it to be made clear that he knows it as well.

"Thanks." Tim offers as he turns back and heads to his car without another word.

*****NCIS*****

Gibbs hasn't felt this helpless and responsible at the same time since he'd lost Tim off his team. Damn it, why had the truth hit him so hard that he'd been left almost paralyzed with it? Noting how Tim has just handled his exile from the diner now, simply by giving him plenty of time and space before bringing him his coffee to go as a way to let him know he'd taken care of their tab in the diner, raises his awareness of just how much Tim has grown. He knows that the young man would have taken this situation much more ages ago, becoming wrapped up in the endless possibilities of what it was at the moment that he might have done wrong. Now, Tim obviously doesn't waste time even considering himself responsible – and rightly so.

This time, there's no need to even think on the subject of culpability because all of it belongs to Gibbs and the Team Leader knows it. What's more, the tough marine also knows he's just been shown by his own conscience, just how not tough he can be when it comes to facing the truth of his own actions that result in hurting someone he's come to care a hell of a lot about. It's been a long time since he's felt this sickened over his own past behaviors and this time, it comes from knowing that whatever else Tim might tell him; the behavior behind it will have been the same; his own.

The only relief he's feeling right now only comes from knowing that Tim has indeed grown comfortable enough with who he is, to realize he's not to blame for any of what was laid out on the table here – even his brief loss of temper. Gibbs is proud of his former agent but he deeply regrets not having told him so more often and certainly a lot sooner than the last time – whenever that was.

Now, the only question that remains is how to mend the hole he's been shown that exists in the fabric that is their 'family'. It needs to be fixed and soon – before Tim leaves for his new post. Because while not a family in any traditional sense, Gibbs knows that each of his team members – both former and current – think of each other as family and will lay down their lives for one another. He also knows and feels the same way in his own heart, that – this family, unconventional as it is, still includes Tim McGee in his own right. What's more; it always will.

*****NCIS*****

Driving home almost on autopilot, Tim doesn't even realize he's failed to let Ziva know he's on his way home; that is, until he's stepped inside his apartment and greeted by her cheerful smile. It's a smile that soon fades, however, when she sees his less than happy countenance.

"Things did not go well?"

With a shrug of his shoulder, Tim kisses her on the cheek. "Could have been better, that's for sure."

"Tim. Do not hide this from me. I am here for you." She chastises him quietly as she leads him by the hand to his couch.

With an audible sigh, he softly begins caressing the back of her hand that's hold his as he glances up at her before letting his eyes fall to their joined hands. "I lost my cool. Not even two minutes into the conversation and I blew it."

"You must have needed to do so. How did Gibbs react?" Ziva replies calmly as if she expected nothing less from the conversation between the two men.

"Like I'd just sucker punched him." Tim doesn't know quite how he feels about what happened; whether to grin or frown. One the one hand, he's a teeny bit tickled to have inadvertently caught the man by such unpreparedness; on the other, he's not proud of himself for lashing out at them man in a loss of temper.

"Do not tell me that you are belittling yourself for handing Gibbs the very truth he has been pushing you to give him!" Ziva quietly, yet firmly demands of him.

"I know I shouldn't be." He admits in a tone that leaves no doubt that he is indeed, doing just that.

"But it is not within your nature to be comfortable losing your temper with anyone you care about."

"No. It's not."

"Give yourself some time to let it go. Here; lay down and I will treat you to a massage because I can feel the tension knotting your shoulders and that is not at all what I want for you." Ziva encourages him as she massages his shoulders.

Shaking his head, Tim gets to his feet reluctantly. "I'll take a rain check on that. Zee. Right now, I need to get this out while it's still fresh – unearthed, you know?"

"So you will be talking with Gibbs again when you have done that, yes?"

"Yeah. But, I think it will go much better if I just get everything out that he wants to know – on paper. Face to face rehashing it obviously isn't working. And I don't have a whole lot of time to spend on trying to talk to him about it. Never thought I'd get back to writing for something like this."

Rising to her feet, she's by his side before he knows it. "I will fix you some coffee."

With a chuckle, he has to refuse the offer. "Sorry, sweetheart. But I just had more than enough while I waited for the man to stop pacing and come back inside and talk to me."

"Oh. Then you do not need any more tonight." She agrees.

Bending slightly to offer her another kiss, he smiles at her. "No, but I'm serious about accepting that massage from you later – if you're willing to wait for me to get this done."

Locking gazes with him, Ziva takes both of his hands in hers. "I am not going anywhere. I will be here for you when you need me."

Knowing she's not just talking about tonight, but always, weakens Tim in the knees and before he can even think about it, he pulls her into his arms, holding her tight as he whispers into her ear with a voice that's breaking from emotion. "Thank you."

She smiles into his shoulder as she accepts the physical embrace she knows he needs to give and receive in kind right now. This is how it should be, both giving and receiving while being there for each other. This is heaven for her and there's no other place she'd rather be, thanks to the boundless love he has shown her and the openness with which he has bared his soul to her, gifting her with the priceless commodities that are his complete trust and whole heart.

It's countless minutes later before he unwillingly yet with determination, gently pulls away from her and kisses her on the cheek. "I have to get this done before I change my mind."

With a matching gentle smile, she encourages him. "Go. I will entertain myself while you work."

One last encouraging smile from her sends him on his way to his typewriter. He's much more at peace using it, even though he'll probably be scanning the finished document into his computer to email it to Gibbs when he's done. Maybe. That part he hasn't decided yet. The most important thing is that he get it all out – everything that led to his decision to leave the team, while this recent attempt to verbalize it has it fresh on his mind and closer to the surface than it's been in a very long time. It's not a debate any longer; that it needs to be gotten out – cleansed and shared with the one who could have changed it all.

*****NCIS*****

He's done! It's all out there on paper now; each word guided by the question Gibbs himself had asked him days ago:

"When you think back to any of it – what does it feel like?"

It's been a struggle, with moments he's had to stop and calm himself while the returning emotions attempted to play havoc on his mind along with the vivid recollections of each event he attempted to depict on the pages under his fingers. The events and the people involved almost felt like strangers on the pages – so much time has gone by – which has made it that much more difficult to stay with this and see it through. With determination and the iron will he seldom needed to rely quite so strongly on – he's gotten done in a manner that he's actually satisfied with.

Pulling the last page from the typewriter with a soul deep conviction, he folds it neatly and inserts it unread in an envelope that he seals and addresses it to Gibbs. Setting it on his hallway table to take with him the next time he heads to NCIS, Tim treads softly to the living room in search of Ziva. Finding her asleep on the couch, curled up under his comforter, brings a smile to his face. Glancing at his watch, he frowns. She's been waiting for him for over two hours now and he's not happy that it took him that long to get it done, but since it is finished and there had been no question that it had been needed, he has little to complain about.

Even though he hasn't eaten dinner, he's not hungry; at least for food. So he settles down on the floor by her shoulders and softly traces his finger down her cheek, tucking her stray hair back behind her ear. She stirs under his touch and opens her eyes, a smile soon bringing even more life to the beautiful orbs looking back at him. "You are finished, yes?"

"Yeah. It's pretty late. Why don't you come to bed?" He encourages quietly as to not rouse her too much.

Sitting up as the comforter drops around her, Ziva smiles as she reaches out and tugs him by his hand to sit on next to her on the couch. "Not yet. We have unfinished business, yes?"

Smiling now, Tim lets himself fall into sitting down beside her, their hands remaining interlocked. "We do, don't we?" He captures her gaze with his own and holds it while toeing off his shoes and turning his body as he slides down on the couch, pulling her on top of him so they are laying completely flat.

"Oof!" Ziva exclaims as she's shifted and eventually laying on top of him. "I cannot massage your shoulders this way, Timothy!"

He smiles at her loving rebuke. Reaching up with one hand, he gently grasps her neck and pulls her head down to his. "Later." He softly offers before gently kissing her with an open invitation to take from him, all that he has to give her.

*****NCIS*****

0500 Sunday Morning finds Tim slipping out of bed, tugging the covers over the beautiful and still soundly sleeping Ziva and leaving her a short note in the kitchen before heading out on a brief but necessary mission. The drive is peaceful and the errand takes all of one minute as he reaches his destination and slips the envelope under the door. Having left his car running, he's able to quickly back out and drive away, already heading back home, mentally head-slapping himself for taking such a risk with his car in D.C. Being able to see the buildings of downtown D.C. from Gibbs' front yard has always left him skittish of the crime possibilities in the area. Then again, the man has always kept his door unlocked, right? Smirking at that thought, he spares a thought to hope that him leaving his car running that way hasn't woken the man up earlier than whatever time he does get up on Sundays.

Returning home, Tim's quick to reset his coffee maker's timer to a later time before crawling back into bed with Ziva. Just as he's done shifting and settling down with her draped around him, she stirs to wakefulness. Without lifting her head, her hands wrap around his waist and gently squeeze him in greeting. "Where did you go?"

"I had a delivery to make." He answers her cryptically because he doesn't want to travel down this conversational road any further. Tim's confident that she knows exactly what he's saying and that this will be the end of it, at least until Gibbs responds to what Tim's written. Even that's only a possibility. Part of Tim hopes the man doesn't even do that, so long as he acknowledges what's there in those pages and accepts that he needs to learn from all of it..

With a smile, Ziva looks up at him as she supports her weight on her elbows. "Does this mean the day is ours?"

"All ours, Milady." Tim grins at her.

"Good. Then it is time for that massage."

"Can we move that offer to the shower?" He asks with a hopeful grin that has her believing Tony's rubbing off on Tim more than either of them realize.

"Let us hope that you have enough hot water to do the job." She answers with a straight face as she lets him help her out of bed and together they walk naked to his bathroom, scooping up clean bath sheets that are so much bigger than the standard towel, as they go.

It's a short trip, but by the time they've reached the shower; with the help of hands that can't seem to stay to themselves as all the right hot spots on each other's bodies have been teased and touched just so, they're both already very hot and very, very bothered.

*****NCIS******

Since he hasn't eaten anything in many hours, by the time Tim makes it out to the kitchen ahead of Ziva on Sunday morning, he is very hungry for breakfast. Their endless lovemaking both in the shower and afterwards has increased that hunger 10x over. He's sure she's really hungry by now as well.

Unwilling to go through the effort of cooking and cleaning up, he offers to take her out to eat. It's nearly eleven now and so close to lunchtime that he calls it brunch, letting her know whichever meal she's in the mood for, will be available to her. Ziva has to smile at the way he tries to take care of her as she accepts his offer.

She's sated and content and the idea of eating out with him is comfortable. The ride is as usual, an enjoyable one spent in companionable silence unless one of them has something to say – which with the sensual and soul intertwining morning they've had, isn't quite the case. She's happy to be by his side as they stroll into the small restaurant and slide into an unoccupied booth and wait to be waited on.

As they glance around the place, Tim notices the traffic outside as the light at the corner turns red and a remarkably familiar vehicle sits idling there. With a smile he grabs his phone and with lightning speed, sends a text message.

"Tim?" She's curious as to what he's doing and what spurred him on so.

"Hope you don't mind some company for breakfast."

"Who?" She asks as she looks in the direction he's just been looking.

Spying the same vehicle Tim has noticed and watching the driver glance at his phone before looking their way, she has to smile. Not only is the young man she's in love with generous to a fault, but he's quick at reacting when presented with the opportunity. She gets up and sits down next to him, leaving the opposite bench clear.

Not only is he offering to buy Tony breakfast, but he's also offering the Senior Field Agent the time to talk, just the three of them, that the older man's been asking for. "It will be nice - just the three of us again, sitting around a meal and talking."

With a smile that lights up his face, Tim reaches for her hand and gently pulls her closer to him and agrees. "Yes it will."

Hmmm. Wonder what Tim actually put down on those pages.