Disclaimer: Not mine.
Tears of Sadness, Tears of Joy
Chapter 6 – Moving On
Previously:
Lily's free hand was now clutched to her mouth, her own tears leaking out of her sparkling eyes to dribble down her now pale cheeks. Remus hung his head as Lily walked around to sit in his lap, holding him and shushing him, his own tears soaking her top. When Madame Pince came round to switch the lights off that evening after telling the Marauders the pair were not in the library at lunch, that was how she found them.
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Remus emerged at the top of the stairs leading to the boys' dormitory the next morning with his face the colour of snow clouds and his disposition no warmer. He glared sourly at the three grinning Marauders below him; they were being far too cheerful and noisy. His mind paused for a second; it was a Tuesday morning, why were they happy – they had double potions first thing! Then, he realised there was only two more real days of the school term left. Hence, there was no time to set any homework. His spirits dropped.
"Remus, I'm going to breakfast, are you coming?" Lily paused on her way out of the portrait hole, gesturing to her friends that she would meet them later. Remus sighed and smiled with a wave at Lily. There was no point in sulking when she had been so lovely to him yesterday. He made his way down the too long staircase and headed towards Lily.
Seeing this, James sprang to his feet and strode across the common room. He was angry with Malfoy for what he did to Lily, but this was cancelled out by the fact that Malfoy was missing the end of term. So, all in all, it was a pretty cheerful day, with a pretty cheerful girl going by the name of Lily Evans in front of him. Plans forming through his mind again, he, Sirius and Peter followed Remus and Lily into the Great Hall for breakfast.
They took their seats three on one side of the table, two on the other. Lily was sandwiched between Remus and Sirius facing James and Peter. Her mind debated on what she was going to say. She knew that she had to let the others know what Remus had told her, but didn't quite know how to say it. Steeling her nerves together, she took a stab at it, "So, Remus," she began, "how are your wounds?" There was a clatter of James' knife falling on the floor, a squeak of Peter coughing and spluttering his pumpkin juice and an exclamation of pain from Sirius. All through this, Remus and Lily were looking calm and collected. The former was just about to open his mouth to say that he was feeling a bit better than yesterday, thankyou, when Sirius yelped when drawing his hand back from his tongue with specks of blood on it.
Lily glanced disapprovingly at it and then commented, "You know, Sirius, there are alternate sources of iron other than resorting to cannibalism." She pushed a dish of apricots at him and then turned to Remus again, "Remus?"
Remus reached behind her and took an apricot. "I'm feeling a bit better than yesterday, thankyou Lily for asking," he glared again at his fellow Marauders, "however," he added with a smile, "my iron stocks may need replenishing." Lily returned the smile and her gaze fell on James' previously gashed face.
"James?" She turned the question to him. James' stared at her, smiling, just sitting opposite from him, her lips moistened from the juice of her own apricot she was munching. How amazing it would be to wake up, knowing that every morning, he would have this visage of perfection to look forward to. He didn't mean it, honestly, he was thinking over her question, but the words slipped out his mouth before he could stop them.
"So, Lily, fancy going on a date?" She stared at him, a flicker of surprise and then boredom, turning into a why-didn't-I-guess look. But the look was tinged with a slight hurt. This time, she didn't just say "no", she told James what was going through her mind.
"No, I don't, James. I thought after…that… you might have changed, might have actually grown up. But now I can see that you will never change… and…" Lily couldn't go on. A whole whirlpool of emotions spun inside her, why was she upset that James had not changed? She didn't actually wan to spend time with him, did she? She did never desire to be all of the Marauders' friends, did she? Another thing that Lily did not want to do was explore those thoughts further. She stood up and picked her bag up from behind her, "I'll see you in Potions, Remus."
Remus vocalised an, "All right, then." to Lily's retreating back before turning to look astoundedly at a dumbstruck James and an amused Sirius. As you may have guessed, Peter tried to copy all three of these emotions and, as predicted his facial expression looked rather…odd to say the least. I am sure a colourful description would not hold a candle to the image before the eyes of the castle.
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The Sixth Year Potions class assembled together outside the classroom half an hour later, politely waiting for Professor Slughorn to open the door and invite them into what promised to be a rare fun-filled lesson. It was common knowledge that the night before was his rowdy cousin's birthday and that this morning, Madame Pomfrey's hangover cure stock would be taking a bashing.
"Quiet please." A hushed normally booming voice asked the gathered students before him. Professor Slughorn waddled towards them with his slight paunch for a younger man. He flicked his wand with a flourish and the door swung open. The class filed in and took their familiar seats. As he was making his way to the front of the room, Lily caught his attention and engaged him in a muttered conversation. His eyebrows rose in curiosity and his tired face lit up in anticipation. With a furtive glance at the unsuspecting Remus Lupin, he addressed his class again. "Miss Evans has just raised a question, I shall return soon, but in my absence please read page seven hundred and thirty-two." Lily followed the Potions master out of the room while the students shot each other confused looks.
Some of the more rule-abiding students even half-heartedly took their books out of their bags before the first paper aeroplane struck James Potter squarely in his muscular chest. The culprit undoubtedly had been Sirius; he could not let that pass without retaliation now, could he?
Ten minutes later, there was no sign of returning footsteps…
Remus dragged his chair in a corner with a book determinedly held in front of his nose trying to fill his ears with thoughts of classical piano concertos whilst everyone else wreaked havoc.
Twenty minutes after that, the brain boxes were still not in sight…
Drum beats blasted out fast and loud over the echoing dungeon out of a conjured version of the Wizarding Wireless Network. This of course was accompanied with various dances. Of course it was very hot and not only jumpers were removed.
Half an hour more, and no more in memory either…
Remus conjured a silence wall around him and his book, trying to concentrate on the history of Rowena Ravenclaw. Needless to say he wasn't succeeding. He coloured his shield in and tried to ignore the thought of Sirius pulling faces on the other side. Healso entertained the idea ofgoing to sit in the library, but then dismissed that rebellious idea; he couldn't leave the classroom without the permission of the teacher!
An hour passed and all traces of Potions had been forgotten…
The sound of the bell proclaiming the end of potion rang with a throbbing tone as if pleading someone to hear it. Remus bolted out of the classroom thankful for the first time in his life that a lesson had ended.
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By Thursday evening, he had spent the passed days unable to figure out what in Merlin's name had gone on that day. Since then, despite prodding and teasing from Sirius, James had not uttered Lily's name. And said girl had spent the last day and a half away from him and his friends. As much as he mourned the loss of her company, it gave him time to think. Was it him she was deserting? Should he not have told her? A part of him thought that this possibility was ridiculous and wondered why he was even considering it.
He looked over at her sitting in the shade of a tree completely ignoring the presence of everyone else around her trying to gather up the remaining dribbles of sun. She felt herself being watched and met his eyes with a small smile. No, she definitely was not angered with him.
Maybe her feelings had changed towards James? After all these years, maybe she was feeling sorry that after tomorrow, the next time she saw him, she would be spending her last year together with James. Maybe she regretted all the time she had wasted. She looked up again and scowled at the offender in question mucking about tearing across the grass like a child.
Maybe not.
I'm sorry it is a bit shorter than usual, but next chapter will be up to full length.
Reviews would be appreciated x x x
Love,
x Imperial Princess x
