Disclaimer: If Harry Potter was split into two sections – an "owning" section and a "wishing to own" section, I regretfully admit that I would be in the "wishing to own" section.

Tears of Sadness, Tears of Joy

Chapter 12 – Summer, Part V – Peter

Previously:

Holly wondered if now that Lily had found out about Frank, she'd force her to do something. She hoped not – after all, Holly was very uncharacteristically patient about waiting for Lily to realise that she loved James…

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It was the penultimate week of the summer holidays. Peter lounged around his bedroom and grimaced at the piles that seemed to have mounted up over the holidays. Mounds of underwear, empty sweet wrappers, crumpled pieces of paper and Merlin knows what else were scattered around on the floor and various surfaces. It seemed as though the floor had been swallowed up in one giant mouthful of rubbish that was spurting out its long tentacles to cover the other furniture. Peter sighed dispiritedly. His friends had abandoned him – Remus at last was paying more attention to the feminine form, and whilst this was a joyous revelation, it did meant that Remus was otherwise occupied; Sirius had scarpered into hiding when he learned that the Blacks were all remaining at Grimmauld Place until New Year, and James was behaving rather… strange, just lately.

Shoving the mess amassed on his rickety bed aside, he threw himself onto his back, with a fascinating view of the ceiling while he pondered what had actually happened to James recently. It had seemed that a new work ethic had appeared in the marauder; an alien concept to most of his friends. Peter thought back to walking in on James completing his holiday homework in the first few weeks of the holidays. No-one, Peter contemplated, no-one committed such a crime like that – well, except Remus, but he was just bizarre that way. Even then, the marauders usually took precautions not to catch sight of textbooks, for fear that they caught a nasty case of Bunk-off-itis that might last into the school term.

"Petey?" Shouted a voice, "Have you finished cleared up that hovel of yours? I haven't seen that carpet for weeks!" He sighed, not even bothered to yell back a half-hearted negative answer to his mother. Lazily, he rummaged around under his pillow until he came up with a wand. Although it had been his cousins and suited him well, it did look a bit battered and worn around the edges. Systematically, he began to levitate the top layer of filthy clothes away into a corner near his door before he got around to shooting textbooks onto his desk from when he had turned his trunk upside down. Spotting a rather thick book half hidden underneath the edge of some greying socks, he aimed his wand at it.

It was a strange book; he didn't recognise it. Bringing it as close to him as he could bear, he gave his wand a little flick to try and jolt the clinging sock off, that was emitting a pungent cheesy aroma "I think you'd do better manually, my boy." Drawled the sneering voice of his small mirror. Although he threw the sock at it, he did reach out an arm to pick up the book (minus the sock). It had a plain black cover, with not writing as to the title. Absently he flicked the front cover over, jumping slightly when the book made a small hiccup. It was not the sort of hiccup due to drinking lemonade too quickly and stopping before it bubbles up your nose, but the kind of hiccup sounded after a crying session; a tearful, shaky hiccup that made Peter lean closer to the book. It hiccupped again. He stroked the book's spine and turned another page.

"Peter, have you even heard me?" His mother shrilled, startling him. Seeing that the book had not been written it, he tossed it casually aside, grumbling about impatience. He decided that the better carry on with clearing his "hovel" before he had to make his own meal tonight.

Miserably turning back to his arduous task, he mused upon what it would be like if his friends really did all leaving him for better things. What if James really did capture the attentions of Lily? A few years from now would the two of them be sitting on their back porch in the cooling heat reminiscing about old times at Hogwarts when they hated each other? Peter fell into a reverie.

A dragonfly landed upon a flower drooping slightly as the heat died down and it was able to dredge up supplied of mostly parched water. His movements were followed by two pairs of eyes. Stretching his legs out down the few steps so they were splashed with the weak rays of sun, James extended an arm around the redhead sitting beside him. She was content to sit there leaning against him slightly in silence as the evening drifted on, before she laughed quietly.

"Can you remember when I was sitting at the lake with my feet in like that," ahe glanced to his legs sprawled in front of him, "When you came and put my arm around me, then I shoved you in the lake?"

In turn, James smiled, "I think it was one of your more surprising nonverbal refusals." He added, "It took Remus ages to stop Sirius howling with laughter whenever anyone mentioned it afterwards."

She shivered slightly as a gust of wind whipped her hair over her bare shoulders, "Shall we go in?" She asked, turning to look at him. James leapt to his feet, and extended a hand to her. As she placed her in his, he jerked it up so she almost flew into him. Lily raised her eyebrow and cuffed him with her left hand, a ring sparkling as it caught the glowing light, "Come on." She said mock reproachfully, leading him into their house.

Would it really be like that? Peter wondered, gathering up sweet wrappers. But even then, he'd still have Remus and Sirius…

"Pass the celery, please, darling." A nasal voice sounded. A voluptuous blonde leaned over as Remus offered her a plate of celery with a smile. He looked slightly pale, as though it had just been the full moon a few days ago, though he didn't seem as tired or strained as Peter had experienced.

"There you go, Caroline." He said charmingly, "Though you really don't need to diet." She laughed a tinkling laugh and nudged his foot playfully with hers under the table in their pristine kitchen.

"All the girls are; I wouldn't want them to feel out of place." She replied. Peter would have expected Remus to scoff at this and tell her that she needed to put on some weight, but she carried on, "I had asplendid time in Paris for the week – although I did miss you." She sent him a look from under her lashes.

"Though the absence was worth your while, judging by the amount of shopping bags Jeeves carried out of the taxi, and I got that urgent report finished. Unfortunately I'll probably be sent on the business long weekend, so I'm afraid you shall have only a month of my company left for another while." Her hand flew gracefully to her mouth,

"Oh Remus, you must work so hard! They always choose you to go on their little meetings." Peter doubted that she'd done a day's hard work in her life – or even knew what the word really meant. Remus, however, merely smiled at her and covered her perfectly manicured hand with his scarred one,

I know, Gorgeous, but that's the price you have to pay to live here." She nodded like a little girl, and Peter paused in his vision to gaze around at the lavish decoration with designer furnishings in the large, open room with double patio doors leading out into a manicured garden.

A frown descended upon Peter's face as he reconsidered – well, maybe it was only Sirius left, then.

Flashing lights blinded him as Sirius gave a wide smile, "Well, you know – it takes hard work and constant practice to produce the leading Quidditch team for two years running. As manager, I do take a lot of the strain –"The interview carried on, amidst loud cheers and screams from the crowd. The euphoria of England having won the Quidditch World Cup yet again was still soaring in their bodies.

When Sirius had managed to extract himself form the hoards of journalists and photographers, he crashed through private doors into a luxurious and peaceful room full of the players and friends or guests. He strolled up to James who was standing next to Reums (who was sipping a large glass of iced water), and received a clap on the shoulder, "I'm frankly amazed you did it, after that scandal two weeks ago." Sirius snorted,

"Come on, mate – it wasn't half a saved screw up as that bloody arrow-formation you tried out on Hufflepuff all though years ago – I haven't forgotten!" The three strolled into the crow of the famous, bantering like old school friends who were as close as brothers.

Peter blinked and slowly, his room came back into focus. When they all left Hogwarts, what if his friends never wanted anything to do with him anymore? What if they all found their own fiancées and had their own houses and –his stomach sank slightly – what about children? Fame or fortune? What if they all forgot about him – little Peter Pettigrew, the weedy tag-along?

He returned desolately to his room, going back to his chore in solitary silence.

Here's an update – I hope you appreciate it. Exams starts really really soon so I don't think I'll be able to update again very soon ;(

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