Two

The next day in first hour, I saw Garrett. I knew he was one of the boys who was with John yesterday. He looked up at me when I took my seat, but he didn't say anything to me. Didn't even smile. It was him, wasn't it? I shook the thought from my head. Maybe he didn't remember. Heather sat down next to me and started a conversation. I tried to pay attention, but I was too hung up on the fact that Garrett didn't notice me. It shouldn't bother me this much. It isn't like we were friends or anything. I only talked to him once.

"...Totally try out, it would be so much fun "

Oh right. Heather was still talking.

"Huh?"

"Cheerleading. You should try out " she repeated. Of course she was a cheerleader. I should have guessed the first day.

"Cheerleading...yeah, I don't think so," I gave a weak smile. That wasn't exactly my thing. I hardly ever wore skirts. Or make up. To be honest, I'd rather be playing football than cheering for it.

"Really?" she pouted, "Oh. Well you'll still come to the games, right?"

"Yeah, definitely." I told her. Mrs. Whitman started talking, and I faced the front, staring at Garrett trying to burn a hole through his head. No such luck.

I hoped maybe John would say something in study hall. A smile, a wave, maybe a "Hey." But I got nothing. I took my seat and looked over at him. He was looking my way. Looking directly at me, actually. Not smiling, not blinking, just staring. I had to look away.

The day seemed to drag on and I couldn't wrap my mind around what had gone on. Had I dreamed even ever talking to him? The rest of the day was a blur.

But sure enough at the end of school, there he was across the street with his four other friends he was with yesterday. I didn't bother walking over. I just stood and waited. I could almost guarantee my mom was going to be late again. Just like yesterday, I looked over at John. He was staring right back at me. But I couldn't look away. I was drawn to him like a magnet. I never broke the stare. He nodded at me again, like yesterday. And like yesterday, I drifted across the street to join him.

"So now you want to talk to me?" I said, half joking. John smiled, a light smile, not an amused smile.

"Yeah. Sorry about that." he said.

"What was that all about?"

"Don't worry about it. I just..." He paused, thinking of something to say then shook his head, "It's probably a bad idea even now."

"Why?" I asked. Garrett opened his mouth to say something, but John spoke before he could. "Reasons."

I didn't know how to respond.

"Anyway, if you're gonna be around for a while you might as well know the rest of the guys." John said. I just nodded.

There were four of them, other than John. John O'Callaghan, or John'O as most knew him, was the apparent leader. John'O. First name, last initial, all one word. He was tall, I came up only to about his shoulder. John'O has long, messy hair that usually covered his eyes and the back of it touched the collar of his shirt. He was almost 18 years old and a senior this year.

Alex Gaskarth, John's second in command was 17 and had blonde hair that came down across his face over one eye. He always wore this grey hat, covering his hair, or most of it anyway. He was pretty tall, but nowhere near John. He was funny. Kept everyone laughing all the time. That's why everyone got along with Alex, whether you wanted to or not.

Garrett Nickelsen was the kid in my English class. Freshly 15 years old and followed John around like a stray puppy dog. He looked like a puppy too with his shaggy hair and his baby face. That's exactly what earned him his nickname. Garrett Nickelsen was the youngest out of all of them. They just called him Babynicko. He didn't mind it though. He looked up to John like a brother and John looked after him the same way. He tried to act tough, but he was really just a little kid at heart. He was cute. A puppy dog kind of cute.

Then there was Nick. Nick Santino had this crazy red hair that stuck up in all directions. He was shorter than John and Alex, just a little taller than Garrett. He was quiet, more shy than the rest of them too. But he was smart. He was only 16 but he knew more than most of the seniors I've ever met. Nick was one of the newest kids to start hanging around John's group. I called them a group only because I wasn't sure whether or not they were really a gang or not.
Finally, there was Dougie. Dougie Poynter. That was the one kid I just couldn't figure out. He was 16 years old, and never once said a word. He never smiled either. He always seemed really detached. Really out of it. He wore long baggy shorts and T-shirts or Hoodies that swallowed his tiny frame. He had a nice bone structure to his face. He was really handsome. But one of the most mysterious kids I've ever met.

We all talked for a while. Just small talk. They asked about me, California, my mom, Andy. I began wondering where my mom even was.

"So if you're living with this Andy guy, where's your real dad?" A voice came from the back of the group and for the first time that day, Dougie spoke. John looked nervous as I opened my mouth to answer.

"Oh...he died when I was seven," I said quietly. All these years and it still hurt to talk about it.

"You miss him?" Dougie asked. I nodded. "Yeah, I still think about him a lot."

Dougie looked me straight in the eye. He had big deep blue eyes that I didn't want to pull away from. He looked me in the eye and just said one word. "Don't."

"Cut the crap, Doug." Alex told him. Dougie rolled his eyes, "No, she ought to know. Don't think about him. Don't wonder where he is. Ever."

"Dougie," John warned, but Dougie shrugged him off.

"Because I'll tell you where he is. He's rotting in the ground somewhere. He's not up in heaven in the clouds with all his family members that died too. It's all a load of bull fed to kids to make 'em feel better about people dying."

I couldn't even respond to that. I didn't know what to say. It should make me angry, but it didn't. It should upset me, but it didn't.

"Cut it out, Doug." Nick told him, stepping closer to me. I'm not sure he realized he did it, but he did.

"No. She ought to know. She's just like the rest of us. I'm just giving you a heads up so the next time it happens you don't waste your time praying to someone who doesn't like you." Dougie told me. And with that, he lit up another cigarette and didn't say another word. Garrett looked at John. John looked back at Dougie. Dougie looked up at him through his thick eyelashes, but didn't say anything. He should be ashamed, but he wasn't. I couldn't even be mad at him. I just wondered what made him say that. I could tell he was hurt.

"You okay?" Nick whispered so low, only I could hear it. I just nodded and he smiled. A big smile with perfect teeth in straight rows across. I smiled back and my mom showed up.

"I'll see you guys later."

"Those your friends?" my mom asked me as we drove away. John smiled as I passed him. I smiled back. "Yeah."