Disclaimer: No Harry Potter for Me.
AN: Sorry about the long wait. I've had tons going on, but I thank everyone for the wonderful reviews. Yay! It made me happy. And know we resume…..
Testosterone
I sighed. I had lost track of time, but I was sure I was slowly going mad.
I sighed again. I have had a song stuck in my head for what seemed like forever. "Get Me Outta Here" by Jet (AN: Love that song!). How ironic.
I sighed a third time.
"Will you shut up?" came Malfoy's ever annoying voice.
Again I cracked. It always seems to happen around him. I wonder why? "Well ferret, I'm just a little stressed out right now. We are stuck in a room for some reason that seems amusing to Zabini, and you know something about it and refuse to tell us! I'll shut up if you tell me why the hell I'm here!"
He just turned his nose up as if I was unworthy of a response. I grinded my teeth together from saying something very unhermione-like.
Ron got riled up, " Yeah Malfoy, Tell us why were here." Malfoy calmly responded, "It must have been a mistake because I doubt Zabini would want you here."
Harry then asked, "So Zabini just wanted to lock you up then?" Harry looked at Malfoy for a response.
Malfoy said," No, me and Granger." Malfoy looked at Harry like he was waiting for Harry to catch on.
I was just confused. It looked like I was on the same page as Harry and Ron.
So I just did the sensible thing. I started yelling. At Malfoy you ask. No, at conniving Zabini who I will never talk to If I ever get out of here.
The pattern it seemed was that Zabini would come and go, and could apparently see us from some unknown location. I felt like a lab rat.
Hoping Zabini was present I yelled, "Zabini, Tell me what the hell is going on right now!"
I continued to yell obscenities.
"Granger, I didn't know you knew such words", Malfoy laughed.
Git. Bastard. I didn't want to deal with him right now. Zabini was acting like God. It was so infuriating to be helpless. I was going to die of over exposure to Malfoy! I mean there is only so much you can take of him. Plus, the fake sunlight coming through the fake windows will most likely reflect of his gelled hair and give me sunburn.
"Smite me Zabini, Smite me", I yelled in a last ditch effort to get Zabini's attention. Malfoy and Ron looked confused while Harry and Zabini laughed at me. Zabini's response gave me hope. "Zabini, please let us go."
His voice filled the room, "Sorry 'Mione I can't." I sighed for the fourth time in ten minutes. That thought wanted to make me sigh again, but I refrained.
I remembered something. I had my bag. I looked for it, but it wasn't there. Damn Zabini!
I was getting so bored. What's further, I didn't know what time it was. I hate not knowing what time it was, but I hate wearing a watch. I know Hermione Granger doesn't wear a watch! The world is ending.
Don't tell anybody. You know reputation to keep up and everything.
"Does anyone know what time it is?" I asked. All three boys were in a fight about quidditch. Figures. I repeated my question in a much louder angrier voice.
Harry responded with a curt 7:30. Ugh. I'd been stuck in here for approximately seven hours.
It seems that the boys were now giving each other death glares. Even Ron and Harry were glaring at each other. It must be an argument over their manliness. Boys.
"Is this an argument over manliness?" I asked sounding much more motherly than I intended. I blame it on the excess of testosterone
The boys didn't respond. They each made a weird noise that sounded kind of like a growl. Oh Merlin. I rolled my eyes.
"Why don't you just settle it with a competition", I suggested.
I know what you're thinking. You think I'm crazy right? Well, as I explained earlier, I agree with you. I've gone totally mad. I know I'm supposed to not interfere with questions of masculinity, but I was bored and had the understanding that boys settled these things with competitions.
I half hoped that they hadn't heard me, but alas my trusty Ron came through. I sighed on the inside.
"Good idea!" he replied joyfully. "What should the competition be?"
Again my smart mouth spoke against my better judgment, "A race or something maybe?"
"Too easy", Harry said. But then he continued. "Unless…" He looked at me evilly. I got the impression that I was not going to like what he said next.
"…. It was a piggyback race", he finished.
I shook my head adamantly. "No, No, and more No", I told him.
Both Malfoy and Ron asked, "What's a piggyback?"
10 minutes later
I groaned. Some how Harry had convinced me to climb on his back and I was pissed. Me and my stupid mouth.
Harry explained that each boy would run across the room (which was quite large mind you) and back with me on their back. They would each get timed with Harry's watch and whoever wins will have earned the title "Most Masculine".
I was starting to wonder why my two best friends were boys.
Harry started. Merlin, it was painful. I'm not going to be able to walk for days. Plus, I was very uncomfortable with how ripped Harry was. I know he's my best friend and I'm not supposed to notice these things, but contrary to some people's belief, I am a girl. I was starting to feel a little flushed.
This was not a good idea.
I was starting to notice little things like Harry's hands were definitely around my thighs. I was definitely wearing a skirt. He definitely seemed unfazed. This definitely was a bad idea.
Harry crossed the finish line with a time of 54 seconds. It seemed like at least an hour. I needed some fresh air. I started to fan myself with my hand. How come that never works? I sighed. Man, I was sighing a lot.
Ron was next. I also seemed to notice these little things. Ron seemed to notice as well. His face was bright red and I'm sure mine was close to the same color. He got a time of 50 seconds.
It hit me then. Draco Malfoy was going to give me a piggyback. No way! I was about to protest when he took two huge strides forward and swung me on his back.
I would have thought the situation kinda funny that I was being thrown around like a rag doll, but more pressing matters were at hand. If piggybacks were awkward with Harry and Ron, there was no way to express the degree of awkwardness of a piggyback with Malfoy.
I certainly noticed that his hands were higher up my legs than necessary. I was going to push them down, but I thought better since I didn't want to fall. Malfoy is tall you know!
I also noticed his smirk that I've come to love. Not!
I told him to move his hands down, but he just gave me that fake innocent expression and told me that he was only following the example of the other boys.
Merlin, he ran fast. I felt like I was either going to fall or vomit. To prevent both of those I tightened my grip and closed my eyes.
"Scared Granger?" he asked. I didn't respond.
Naturally he won with 49 seconds. The other boys called for a rematch, but I went to the corner of the room and sat down. I was not doing that again. That's too much trauma for one day.