A/N: Sorry for updating so slowly!
1. Make fudge for him.
2. Tell him that he looks awful in lime green.
3. Imply that he works as a prostitute as a side job. Just look at how much he has made in "bribes" from Lucius Malfoy over the last few years.
4. Tell him that Albus Dumbledore is so much better than him.
5. Repeat with Pius Thicknesse, Amelia Bones, etc.
6. Set him up for a blind date with Rufus Scrimgeour.
7. Nickname him "Corny Fudge." If questioned, answer that Cornelius Fudge is too long, and he needed something more suited to his personality.
8. Refer to his affair with Dolores Umbridge.
9. Ask him how the Ministry could be so careless as to let an innocent man out of prison.
10. Say that he is a Squib, after all, he uses magic so rarely that its highly probable.