Happiness isn't the absence of grief. I realize that now. Kazumi wasn't always smiling because she's had it easy. She struggled over and over until she could smile like she does, regardless.

Just what is it that makes people so different? Do some people just lack the strength to smile despite all the crap life's dealt them?

Am I one of those weak people?

There's one thing I know for sure: Kazumi sure as hell isn't one of those weaklings. Nothing about her is weak, and I was just left wondering how she got to be the way she is. One day, she actually went out of her way and gave me the answer I was looking for.

I don't think I'll ever forget that day. It forever changed the way I look at Kazumi. I respected her before, but after everything she told me...How could I not see her differently?

Happiness isn't the absence of grief. It's the power to deal with that crap, look past it, and smile.

Chapter 23: The Kazumi Chronicles: Reminiscence

'Why'd I want to find this guy, again?' Fū asked herself as she rose from the ground with a wince. Her wrists were becoming increasingly strained from repeatedly breaking her fall. Numerous bruises and welts marred her body from the daily punishment. Her status as a jinchuuriki did well to aid in that department, but the fact that there were as many visible injuries as there were on her body spoke volumes about the intensity of her training. She struggled to catch her breath as she glared at her assailant/trainer.

Naruto had the audacity to smirk at his temporary student as he bounced on the balls of his feet. "You almost got me that time. Get ready, 'cause we're not done, yet." Naruto said before he vanished in a black blur, Burst Stepping and Air Dashing around Fū.

Fū sighed dramatically before sneaking a glance over to the audience she and Naruto attracted, which amounted to a group of toads, Kazumi, and Jiraiya. Jiraiya followed Naruto's movements easily with his eyes while Kazumi seemed to be lost in thought. Well, that was certainly annoying for Fū to see.

This had been the basic routine for the last week since the trio arrived in Mt. Myoboku. Naruto took advantage of the fact that Fū was a jinchuuriki. He would wake her up early in the morning and have her train until she literally dropped. Lather, rinse, repeat. If she didn't know better, Fū would think Naruto was deriving some sort of enjoyment from training her.

Or maybe he just enjoyed tormenting the weak.

Today happened to be speed training; that is, Naruto would have Fū train her eyes to track his Burst Step. Other days typically involved strength training, chakra training, or whatever else Naruto believed Fū needed to improve. Some days involved an (un)healthy mixture of everything. As brutal as it seemed to her, Fū was well aware Naruto was taking it easy on her. She had seen him go all out in his own training or in spars against Jiraiya or Kazumi, so she had a basic idea of his abilities.

On a side note, Fū discovered that Naruto hated to be called Naruto-sensei. Go figure.

Fū quickly raised her arms to defend against a sudden, rapid barrage, courtesy of Naruto. She jumped back to avoid a particularly nasty attack while keeping her eyes fixed firmly and solely on Naruto's rapidly moving figure. Well, the training was certainly fruitful in that regard, she noted as she threw a side-kick that just barely missed Naruto. She wasn't exactly able to match Naruto's speed, but she improving in her ability to track it. Naruto had claimed that countering a fast-moving opponent was just as important, if not more so, than matching his/her speed.

Of course, Fū's steadily rising self-confidence promptly sunk when she realized Naruto would up his speed any time she came close to tagging him. His increase in speed proved to be too much when zipped behind Fū and swept her legs. He didn't stop there, though. Naruto had an ironclad rule in his training: "When you fuck up, I'll let you know in worst possible way." Something about motivation or whatever. While she was still in the air, Fū felt Naruto grab her foot and literally fling her at one of the massive toad statues.

Fū's back collided with the statue and she stifled a groan of pain. "Okay. The sweep? That's just peachy." Fū started, nursing her aching back while she glared at her assailant/trainer. "The throw? A bit, just a bit, unnecessary." Fū's eyebrows rose when she noticed Naruto grimacing almost as if he were in pain.

'This damn feeling again. Even just using the Burst Step causes this thing to react.' Naruto's grimace turned into a scowl as he started walking away. As if just remembering what he was doing previously, Naruto glanced over his shoulder at Fū. "Your training for the day is done. Relax, pick some flowers, eat some insects, do whatever." He said dismissively, strain evident on his features regardless of his efforts to conceal it. With that, he turned heel and walked away.

Fū had something to say about that, though. "The guy chucks me into a statue, then calls it a day. Unbelievable." She complained. Then she crossed her arms and shouted loud enough for Naruto to hear wherever he went, "You know what? I will pick some flowers, Naruto-sensei." Having said that, she stomped off to the nearest flowers in Mt. Myoboku.

"I honestly can't tell which one of them is weirder between the two of them." Jiraiya remarked before chuckling. "Then again, you and I aren't too normal either." He said, glancing over to Kazumi who had her eyes trained on where Naruto had walked off.

Wordlessly, Kazumi stood and walked off in her own direction.

"What's gotten into everybody?" Jiraiya muttered, scratching his head in confusion.

Contrary to popular belief, Sealing Jutsu isn't some volatile art in which the slightest mistake blows off a limb. Messing up an aspect of any given seal generally meant that the seal wouldn't function correctly. Incorrect function usually amounted to certain traits of the seal just not performing at all. If Sealing Jutsu really was such a dangerous art as many believe it to be, literally no one would ever practice it. If that had been the case, there wouldn't be the amazing seals that allowed for jinchuurikis to be made, there wouldn't be anyone proficient enough in the art to be called a sealing master, and there certainly wouldn't have been a clan whose strength centered around Sealing Jutsu.

Those were the first things Jiraiya had made clear when he began teaching Naruto the basics of Sealing Jutsu. The second thing Jiraiya made abundantly clear was that Sealing Jutsu is an art that rewarded creativity, ingenuity, and intuition. Of course, there are fundamental aspects that need to be understood prior to creating your own seals like knowing the symbols that correspond to whatever the focal point of the seal happens to be. Besides that, Sealing Jutsu is all about putting your mind to the test.

Naruto and quite a few of his clones toiled away with their ink pens, committing the basic symbols for chakra and the elements to muscle memory. That, he decided, would be his first step. Finding a way to get the Cursed Seal of Hell would be his main priority immediately following that. There simply wasn't another choice. With the cursed seal being as reactive with his chakra as it was, Naruto wouldn't be able to fight at all. The slightest chakra usage caused acute pain and fatigue. Jiraiya claimed that was due to the Evil Sealing Method seal he placed on Naruto to suppress the influence of the cursed seal. It did the job of preventing the seal from feeding off Naruto's dark desires and taking control of his body, but it also backfired in such a way that Naruto couldn't use his chakra without feeling the backlash from the seal.

It was a catch-22 of the worst kind since Naruto's life was riding on his ability to fight.

Naruto's concentration strayed just a bit too far, and the lapse showed in the seal he was working on. He scowled fiercely before crumpling the used paper and throwing it over his shoulder carelessly.

"This seriously fucking sucks." Naruto ground out, lying on his back and gazing at the sky above. He sighed in frustration. "If I were to be attacked, with the way I am right now, I wouldn't be able to defend myself." He said softly, closing his eyes.

Naruto heard faint footsteps heading in his direction before the sound seemed to stop right before him. He didn't bother opening his eyes. He could tell who it was by scent alone.

"What is it, Kazumi?" Naruto asked without moving an inch. He still hadn't opened his eyes yet. Instead, Naruto heard her come closer and lay down next to him.

Okay, that was odd enough to warrant eye-opening. Naruto glanced to his side to see Kazumi simply lying there quietly.

'What the hell?' Naruto thought to himself as he stared at the Anbu girl beside him. She wasn't even smiling. She was just staring ahead with a glazed look in her eyes. For all intents and purposes, it was almost as if she strolled next to Naruto and just died. He looked away with a scowl.

"What is it?" Naruto said more forcefully, hoping to elicit some sort of reaction from Kazumi. He glanced back at Kazumi to see if she had even turned her head, but she just kept staring.

Naruto sat up and waved his hand in front of Kazumi's face. 'Still nothing.' Naruto thought, his face contorting into a mixture of annoyance and concern. He pondered the predicament for a few seconds before an idea came to him.

Kazumi knew she wanted to talk to Naruto. She felt compelled to do so ever since she saw the seal on his throat. Kazumi had walked over to him intent on speaking to him. She found herself in a predicament when she just simply couldn't think of what to say. So, she lied down beside him and thought heavily on what she would say.

Kazumi wasn't the most self-aware person, especially when something was concerning her. Therefore, she was quite surprised to find herself almost entirely covered in dirt with only her head sticking out. Her face wasn't left alone, either. There were several tadpoles and small toads dancing on face. Her eyes glanced up in confusion to the probable source of the oddities.

Naruto stood above her, staring at her blankly with a tadpole caught between his fingers. He was probably going to place that one on her face as well.

Kazumi shook her head to get the amphibians off her before glaring at Naruto who showed no reaction to the negative attention.

"So, care to explain why I'm currently buried in dirt." Kazumi questioned evenly. When Naruto gave no indication that he was going to answer her, she continued. "Oh no, take your time. I actually enjoy getting down and dirty with the earthworms."

"I'll answer as soon as you tell me why you're so damn spacey." Naruto quipped. There was a method to his madness. Quod erat demonstrandum.

"I've been thinking." Kazumi began with no small amount of hesitation. Naruto motioned for her to continue. "That cursed seal on your neck... I knew it from the moment I saw it, what it was and what it meant."

Kazumi stopped and glared at Naruto again. "If I'm going to keep going, you're going to have to help me out of the dirt. Kinda hard to keep a serious conversation going when you're buried up to your neck." Another small toad jumped on her face. "Hey! Shoo, shoo!"

Naruto hid a satisfied smirk, then got to helping Kazumi free herself. A few minutes later, Kazumi was standing while brushing remnants of dirt from her clothing.

"You're a real jerk, you know that?" Naruto nodded, staring back at Kazumi with purple eyes that reflected his amusement. "Just reminding you in case you forgot."

Kazumi settled back down and used the minor distractions to gather her thoughts. Naruto glanced over to his companion, silently questioning why she had gone quiet again. She looked so unusually vulnerable. Whatever she had to say, it seemed to be something that would take her out of her general comfort zone.

Kazumi fixed her gaze directly on Naruto. "I need to tell you this story; a story I kept to myself for years." Kazumi's gaze never wavered. "I've never been much of a story-teller since my mind used to be so jumbled, but this one's coming from the heart, fox-boy, so listen up well, okay?"

Ten Years Ago

"Do you believe in destiny, sweetie?" Kaoru, a middle-aged woman, youthful in appearance, pondered in her gentle voice. The young girl sitting by her mother's side glanced up with wide, dark brown eyes at her mother. The wind ruffled her light brown hair and she shivered in response to the chill.

"What's destiny taste like?" The girl named Kazumi questioned innocently. Her mother smiled as she took off her black scarf and wrapped it around her shivering daughter, gently admonishing her for forgoing her jacket.

"Destiny isn't something you can eat." Kaoru patted Kazumi's head as she could feel her daughter's attention waning almost immediately with the revelation. "It isn't something you can touch, either."

"Yawn..." Kazumi muttered in a dramatically bored tone. "Wake me up when the fun part starts." She said, making a point of closing her eyes and snoring loudly.

Kaoru chuckled fondly. "Let's try this a little differently. Do you think some things, really important things, are meant to happen? That you have big things that only you can do?"

"Mommy, you're a weirdo." Kazumi declared with a bright grin. She pulled the scarf a little tighter and snuggled closer to her mother's side.

"I suppose I am." Kaoru agreed, her smile never wavering.

"But why only me? Couldn't somebody else do the big stuff?" Kazumi asked after a long stretch of silence.

"I can see it." Kaoru stated. Kazumi glanced up at her mother, silently prompting her to continue. "You have a special gift, and it lies right here." Kaoru said, pointing to her daughter's heart.

"My chest?" Kazumi questioned in confusion.

"Your heart." Her mother corrected. "Your beautiful, bright, big heart." Kaoru said, smiling as she tickled her daughter who was sent into a giggling fit.

"You can change people for the better." Her mother said, holding Kazumi tighter than before. "Light up the darkest corners of another's heart."

"I can see it. I know it's there, and I know you'll save someone special." Kaoru finished in a gentle tone, glancing down at her smiling daughter.

'Wherever he is, Kazumi, you might be the only person who can save your brother.' Kaoru thought to herself, holding her daughter closer.

My mother was the only family I knew. That was our life. It was always 'Mommy and Me.'

And that was fine.

My mother struggled to keep us alive, so we were always slumming it in our little home in Ta no Kuni.

But that was fine.

Even though things were tough, even though we only had each other, we were happy.

But the thing is, all things come to an end. An abrupt, earth-shattering end. And nothing, not even clairvoyance, could prepare me for the nightmare that struck like an indiscriminate flame straight from hell.

Three Years Ago

This was something she'd been keeping to herself for quite some time, and Kazumi deserved to know about it. Kazumi was of an age where she could fully understand what happened to her family, so, as she toiled physically in the modest kitchen of her home, Kazumi's mother toiled mentally to come up with an appropriate way to explain the situation to her daughter.

Kazumi put up a good front in an attempt to convince both herself and her mother that it didn't bother her, but having known the teenage girl all her life, Kaoru could spot Kazumi's quirks effortlessly.

Kazumi cared. That much was clear. To what degree, though, was a moot point.

"Kazumi, could you come in here for a second?" Kaoru called. "I have something important to tell you." Showtime.

"What's up?" Kazumi answered back, strolling into the kitchen, tugging on the black scarf she always wore, even indoors. "If it's about the grass and dirt in your hair this morning, I told you already. The cat did it. I don't know how, but that evil fuzzball did it."

Kaoru blinked before responding. "We don't even have a cat." Kazumi's statement was so ridiculous it almost threw her mother off entirely. "Hang on, this is important, and it has nothing to do with grass or whatever." Why Kazumi decided to put grass and dirt of all things in her hair was beyond her. She was always pulling weird pranks, probably out of boredom.

Kazumi absently pulled out a snack from her pocket and began nibbling. "I'm listening." That's a first.

Kaoru took a deep breath and distanced herself from her cooking to approach her daughter. "You were always asking about your family when you were younger, and I decided to tell you about it a while ago, but it's a long, complicated story, so I didn't know how to tell you, and-"

"Mom, your ra~mbling." Kazumi mentioned in a sing-song tone.

Kaoru chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry." She regained her bearings before continuing. "I guess I'll start with your father."

Kazumi nodded for her mother to continue.

"He was a shinobi with huge ambitions, but he wasn't very strong." Kaoru said with a wistful smile. "He was so gentle and loving, maybe too gentle for his line of work. Whenever he was forced to take a life, he'd be torn up for a while."

"Awww." Kazumi drawled with a goofy smile. Kaoru smiled at her daughter's antics before her expression turned solemn.

"He...was killed...not long after you were born." Thinking of the circumstances of her lover's death was never a pleasant experience.

Kazumi's smile faded as well.

"Kazumi...I remember you asking me before why you didn't have brothers or sisters." Kaoru sighed as if she were about to release a heavy burden. "You're not an only child."

Kazumi's reaction might have been humorous had the circumstances been different. Those words just kept reverberating through her mind as she tried to piece together a suitable response. "I...you...what?"

Kaoru took a deep breath, something she found herself doing quite a lot lately. She tried her best to resolve herself to continuing her explanation, but the more she tried, the more painful the recollections became until her head started to hurt.

"Your brother...his name is Kenshin." Here was another source of anguish for Kaoru; a failure of hers that would forever scar her. "Kenshin could never quite accept the sad position we lived in. You see, things were always so tough because your father could hardly complete missions the rare times he was assigned them."

"This land is home to many shinobi clans. Those born without any ties to a clan here are often treated very poorly." Kaoru said solemnly, noticing the myriad of emotions being displayed through Kazumi's eyes. "The clans, themselves, aren't very friendly with each other, but they at least respect each other."

"We never get that." Kazumi stated, struggling to keep a whimper out of her speech. She wasn't dense. They were alone. That was the situation, and it always seemed to be that way.

"The world isn't a very kind place, and no one knew that better than your father." Kaoru managed to utter. She could distinctly remember the awful things the clan shinobi would do and say about him. "Even so, he never lost his light or his optimistic goals."

Pieces of the puzzle were slowly coming together to form a bigger picture, a very grotesque picture. Kazumi's expression reflected her horror from the conclusion she came to.

"It was the clan shinobi, wasn't it? They...killed him, didn't they?!" Tears stung at Kazumi's wide-eyes as she stuttered out the question.

To her surprise, her mother merely shook her head. "No, it wasn't them. They were bad, but not bad enough to kill your father. To them, he wasn't even worth the effort."

"I really should tell you more about your brother, Kenshin, shouldn't I?" Kaoru asked rhetorically. "As I said, he never could accept the position we were in. Kenshin was only seven years old at the time, but he was always so angry."

"He rarely smiled or laughed or showed any sort of emotion other than anger at the clan shinobi. He'd march right up to their clan compounds, shouting at them, cursing their unfairness with angry tears falling from his eyes." Tears started to fall from Kaoru's eyes as she recalled the terrible event. "The clan shinobi are very prideful people, so after being called out by a clan-less child, they were certainly not pleased."

"Your father could only do so much to help, but he was beaten that day, too." Kaoru wiped away the tears on her cheeks and looked away from Kazumi. "I think that was the breaking point for Kenshin. After that, he never smiled, never showed any emotion, and he stared at your father with such contempt."

"All the signs were there, but I kept hoping that things would sort themselves out, that things would improve, but they never did. It only kept getting worse and worse until-"

A piercing shriek interrupted Kaoru from continuing her explanation. Both mother and daughter rushed over to the window to see what the commotion was, and immediately they were both wishing they hadn't.

"You damned fool." A man with a rudimentary gray shinobi uniform with a black mask named Hiko muttered to the identically dressed man beside him. "What part of swift and silent don't you understand?"

The man being chewed out, Makoto, merely scoffed. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

"You need a serious attitude readjustment. Orochimaru made it a point to mention that he didn't want too much of ruckus to be raised with this, and here you are, all Gung-Ho." Hiko grounded out, frustration evident in his hushed tone. "This is a job for those suited toward assassination. You know, the silent variety?"

Makoto merely shrugged off the slight. All Makoto knew was that Orochimaru gave the clan shinobi of Ta no Kuni a promise of power in exchange for loyalty and the "removal" of the ordinary civilians and the shinobi not affiliated with any sort of clan who were not powerful nor willing to join his cause.

Essentially, that just left the clan shinobi.

The clan shinobi of Ta no Kuni had been used in a hopeless war, and as such, they suffered heavy losses without any sort of gain. Each of the clans desired prominence that they certainly wouldn't be able to achieve in their meager existences in Ta no Kuni. Orochimaru was their salvation, but he came with a price and the clan shinobi, those who were willing to follow him, were paying in installments.

Naturally, there was opposition to Orochimaru's offer; people who were not willing to cast away their morals and vehemently protested against Orochimaru's methods of power acquisition. Orochimaru claimed that those not in favor of his methods were free to object, but he wouldn't allow them to stand in his or anyone's way willing to reach for power.

That certainly hadn't ended well for the objectors, and that served as added incentive for the others.

There was a level of dark desire tinged with fear that served as the motive for the clan shinobi's decision, and so, the removal was well underway.

Makoto shot a cursory glance at his partner before staring straight ahead with a uncharacteristically stony visage. "So, what are the chances that Orochimaru's just using us?"

Hiko was only briefly surprised by his partner's complete and sudden shift in personality. "Rather high, I would venture to say." Hiko responded, shaking his head at the bleak reality. "But do we really have much of a choice? You saw what happened to those who tried to resist this." What made that even more disheartening was that the resisters certainly were not small in number.

"Also, there's the chance that Orochimaru may actually be a man of his word simply looking to build a loyal backing for whatever he intends to do." Hiko concluded, not really believing his own words yet speaking them anyway. Self-reassurance, maybe?

Makoto shook his head. He was about to respond to Hiko sarcastically when his eyes landed on two women peeking outside of their window in a house about twenty meters away. Their eyes were wide with fright undoubtedly from the blood-stained masked-men currently glowering at them. Makoto signaled to Hiko to make him aware of the two.

"Had you killed that last one swiftly and silently, they most likely wouldn't have spotted us." Hiko reprimanded Makoto. "This one will certainly not be clean."

"Shut up and let's just do this already." Makoto muttered, already preparing to charge the two women in the rather rundown house. Honestly, he would have just pegged the house as abandoned or one that had already been attacked.

Before they could close the distance, a man with long brown hair and clothing identical to theirs landed in their way. He turned a black stare on them cold enough to freeze them in their tracks.

"Leave this to me. You two continue forward." The long-haired man said flatly.

Makoto and Hiko shared a look before nodding and departing. They were only vaguely familiar with that man. Hell, they didn't even know his name, but even just from this little meeting, he was rather intimidating.

The long-haired man slowly turned toward the rundown house before he found himself unable to move.

'What the hell?' He thought to himself. 'Come on, move damn it.'

His feet felt as if they were made of lead. He grit his teeth as he struggled to move for reasons beyond his understanding. He clenched his fists hard enough to draw blood, and apparently that was what it took to gather himself.

The two women darted from the window once they saw the man approaching.

Kaoru's breath hitched once she saw the man coming their way. She grabbed her daughter by the arm and started moving away from the window as quickly as her legs would allow her. She spared Kazumi a cursory glance to see how she was reacting, but the wide-eyed, mouth-opened expression informed Kaoru that her daughter was presently in shock.

"Kazumi, listen to me," Kaoru started speaking with no small amount of panic in her voice, "You need to go find some place to hide. Now! And don't peek out no matter wh-"

Kazumi snapped out of her shocked state once her mother abruptly stopped talking. She glanced up to see the reason when her mother fell to the ground, a kunai buried to the handle in the back of her head.

Kazumi's eyes widened and darted about. Her hands started shaking and her knees buckled. She fell to the floor and let out a bloodcurdling scream. Tears rained from her eyes as she stared at the fallen form of her mother.

The door to her house was sliced and kicked in by the same man who killed her mother, but Kazumi didn't even notice. Too horrified by the death of her mother, Kazumi didn't look up at the killer until he was standing right before her.

The long-haired man's legs stilled at the sight of the young girl and her dead mother. Once again, his hand was stilled by...something, almost as if something within him were trying to stop the killing.

'Guilt from the deed, maybe?' The man reasoned as he struggled to just swing his sword and finish what he started. 'It would be a hell of a lot easier if I could just do it quickly. This damn hesitation is making it that much harder.'

Kazumi, paralyzed with fear, could only watch as the man held a glimmering sword above his head with an unsteady hand.

The man's eyes narrowed at the sight of the crying girl before his eyes traveled toward the lifeless mother. His heart ached at both sights until he simply couldn't bring himself to continue. He sheathed his sword and stared at the tearful girl before him with cold, black eyes.

'If I told her run now, there's no chance in hell she'd make it before being spotted by someone else and killed on the spot. And by the look of things, she wouldn't move much even if given the option.' The man contemplated before a rather disturbing idea came to him. 'It's not the greatest. In fact, it's the shittiest idea of all time, but it's the only option.'

"Kid, I don't think you feel like dying today, and believe it or not, I don't feel like killing you." Rather odd statement coming from a person who just killed someone's mother. Kazumi probably would have said something to that effect had she had her usual exuberance, but right now...She couldn't even put up a resistance with her present frame of mind.

Kazumi had nothing to say, so the man continued, "Like it or not, for better or for worse, this is your only chance, so keep your mouth shut and leave things to me."

That was the last thing Kazumi heard before she fell unconscious; a swift bang to the back of the head from a sheathed sword being the culprit.

'Guilt.' The man reasoned, glancing down at the sight of his crimes. 'That's it, and nothing more.'

When he thought of what he was about to do, he scowled fiercely. Honestly, the girl was on a quick spiral toward a hellish dance with the devil, and nothing would ever be the same.

He hoisted Kazumi over his shoulder before making his way out of the house. 'No doubt about it.' The long-haired man thought to himself as he gave the girl on his shoulder a cursory glance. 'I'm going to burn in hell for this.'

Bit of a short chapter for such a long wait. There's going to be at least one more chapter for the Kazumi Chronicles before I make my back into the main story. When I get to that point, I'll put a little recap in the beginning so that you guys don't have read the story over to know what's going on if you don't want to.

Till next time.