Elsa stared at the blue electric digits. The alarm clock screaming, and her heart pounding. She turned it off as to not wake Miza or Anna, or even Jack who had almost permanently settled on the couch. Elsa forced her spine to pick up her body weigh as her eyes locked. Her head pounded with the migraine of a sleepless night. Sounds familiar doesn't it?

Elsa touched her cheek, yes she was still there. She stared at the long sleeves and pulled them down, purple lines etched with silver waking her fully up. Yes, she was still there. It was not a dream. She ran fingernails through her scalp and gritted her teeth, was it possible to not know if you're still alive?

Apparently, it was for Elsa. She almost bolted for the shower, her stomach turning. She couldn't stop the images, the blood curdling pictures. She barely made it to the toilet, purging away all her thoughts. She gripped her stomach, willing herself not to make another mistake, Don't feel. A voice deep inside tried to rescue her, Don't feel.

But the images were too unkindly, the thoughts, disturbing. She saw MArco again and again, falling to the floor- disappearing from her veiw. Her dream were Miza turned around with replicated wrists of Elsa's own. Anna screamed she wished it was her not Marco and a gravestone with 'Anna Aren' was enough to send Elsa spiraling out of control.

When her stomach had nothing left to give, her lungs begged for too much air. Elsa scrambled through the medicine cabinet, cases on anti-anxiety pills dropping to the floor. Her inhaler, she needed it where was it? Her breath became raspy, her throat bled from the over exposure and right when Elsa felt her eyes begin to roll back into her head she stumbled backwards into Jack's open arms, an inhaler in his hand.

In one hand was Elsa, in the other was her inhaler, Jack held it up to her mouth and pressed the button, Elsa breathing in the soured medication.

"Jack." Elsa breathed once her lungs were calmed, the sour smell of bile still fresh on her lips.

"Sh... Elsa don't say a word... Everything is okay." He held her close, and Elsa melted in his arms. She let out a single sob, the rest was just water flowing free from her eyes. Jack shut the toilet lip and sat Elsa on top of it, comeing down to his knees. His thumbs wiped away her tears, and her set his forehead on hers.

"This is a nightmare." Elsa whispred, her eyes closed tight and her hands gripping his shoulders.

"I'll wake you up." Jack's breath was warm against her chilled skin.

"This can't be real." She murmered again, as if she had not heard him. Her fear speaking for her.

"Then I'll dream with you."

"I think I'm going crazy."

"Then I can't be sane." Jack cupped her cheeks in his hands, Elsa's breath becoming lighter, and her tears becoming dryer. "Take a shower Elsa, get ready for the trial..." She could feel Jack shiver at the mention of the trial, and Elsa felt her own skin become sick with agony.

"Okay." Elsa could barely manage a whisper and when Jack stood up she pulled herself up with his help. He turned to leave, and Elsa pulled on his shoulder.

Don't leave me.

"Jack." She said again, the word that felt so comforting on her voice. She hesitated, knowing it was wrong, but she kissed his cheek sweetly, slowly, fearfully.

When she pulled away she looked right up into blue eyes, oceanic, gorgeous. He looked back at her with sorrow, an expression that as still stinging the back of her throat.

"Elsa, don't be afraid." He said so softly she could have sworn it had never been vocalized. "Don't be afraid of living."

Elsa searched for something more in his orbs, and only replied when she knew he was sincere. "I'm not afraid of living. I just wish I wasn't"

The gritting of Jack's jaw was visible, the way he looked... He looked like he wanted to scream. The tense of his chest, the tears in his eyes, the stiff of his shoulders all seemed to speak the truth about how sad he was. She looked into his eyes and saw a child, who was forced to grow up too suddenly, too fast, who still didn't understand that no matter what happened the world was still spinning. A child who did not understand that although they were going through a tough time there were still people waking up with newborn babies, children running paper routes, teenager going to high school and feeling safe, cops finding abusive wives beating there children, a psychiatrist speaking to a rape victim.

She looked at Jack and saw herself hidden within the two shades lighter hair, the three shades darker blue, the matching porcelain skin, the smile she forgot.

"Elsa-" She stopped his with the uplifting of her hand, she stared into his eyes and watched a single tear break free.

"I'm not going to leave you Jack, you made a promise... and now I'm making it back." His eyes, the light coming back into his eyes was immaculate. "I'm staying right here... Jack... forever." She turned her gaze back up into his eyes.

No, she would not mind spending an eternity with Jack.

.:*:.

"Are you going to be okay Miz?" Elsa was leaning over, to meet Miza in the eyes.

"Mom, I'm okay." Miza managed a smile and kissed Elsa's forehead. "Go make sure that bad-guy goes to jail."

Elsa smiled, her throat closing at Miza's request.

"Of course I will." She messed with Miza's hair and stood back up, looking a Tooth. The girl had changed alot, she was quieter, but still bouncy and OCD as she was when Elsa met her. "You alright with this Tooth?"

"Of course Elsa." Tooth threw her arms around Elsa in a friendly hug. "You go get him alright?" Elsa nodded and when Tooth let go, Sandy looked up at Elsa, he flashed her a thumbs-up, his most common form of communication. She flashed it back, and smiled. Her phone rang in her back pocket.

"Hello?" Elsa answered before looking at the name. Carne.

"Elsa, are you up and ready for the trial?"

"Yes."

"And so are Miza and Anna?"

"Miza is not coming."

"What? No Miza needs to be there remember the jury-"

"Fuck Carne I'm not taking an 8 year old girl to a rape and murder trial!" Elsa looked down at Miza who was staring at her. She took the phone away from her face and mouthed 'Its ok Miza.' Before storming out the front door.

"Elsa do you want Hans to get the time he deserves or not?"

"Hans will get his time and he sure as hell will get it without sacrificing Marco's younger sister!" Elsa pressed 'END' on the call and stormed down the driveway, Anna and Jack following after her. Instantly her phone rang again and she answered it.

"Elsa this is important, you're Miza's caretakier-"

"What the fuck does that have to do with Hans not being insane?"

"The jury will feel sorry for you-"

"I DON'T CARE! Miza is 8 years old and she's already experianced things most people will never have to deal with. No Carne Miza is not coming to the god damn trial. "

"Fuck Elsa!"

"Don't you have any humanity?"

"Thats why I'm DOING THIS, do you really want Hans back on the streets b the time he's forty?"

"If that means Miza will live a somewhat happy life then yes!"

"What? NO ONE will live a happy life with that bastard on the streets."

"Thats why he wont be there."

"Elsa is Hans is set free early-"

"I take full responsibility."

"Thats not wha-" Elsa threw her phone on the grass before he could answer, and slammed herself inside of the car.

.:*:.