Author's Notes: The ending is a bit rubbish, I know, but the next two chapters are important ones and connected to the end of this one as well, so I had to tie it up somehow. I hope you like it, though, and – just like always when the chapters are closely connected, I'll try to update as soon as possible.

Day Twenty-Three: Making Up Afterwards

Much to Jack's surprise, Ianto wasn't hiding in the library but had went out instead. 'Out' turned out to be a place he'd never seen before but that was mostly likely on Earth as Ianto was sitting on the edge of a cliff, swinging his legs, as Jack approached him.

"Where and when are we?" He asked anyway and Ianto turned around to face him. He looked vaguely guilty and uncomfortable as well as a bit lost – his back hunched and his whole posture making him seem smaller – but he nodded to Jack to sit next to him anyway.

"Venus, a bit after the birth of the Solar System," Ianto said and narrowed his eyes at the Sun and Jack looked at it long enough to realise that it was indeed the same one – just a lot closer than it was from Earth's point of view. "It was like that before the carbon dioxide started getting too much for it to bear."

"Oh," Jack was trying really hard to keep the conversation civil, but it wasn't working very well; not when he had to bite his own tongue to do it and when he could feel the waves of tension coming from Ianto. "Look, about that in there–"

"Never mind," Ianto said quickly, but Jack shook his head. "No, listen to me. At least once, let me talk so we can get this sorted once and for all, okay?"

Ianto looked at him for a long moment, his expression unreadable, before nodding wordlessly.

"I'm trying really hard to keep up," Jack started quietly. He wanted to place all cards on the table – finally – so they wouldn't need to go through this again. "And it's difficult sometimes – you die, you come back, you disappear again, you show up from the Shadow Proclamation's Asteroid months after your own death and you're suddenly a completely new person. All of a sudden, I have three Time Lords on my hands and they have inter-relationships even weirder than the ones we had at the Time Agency, but that was still fine. I got through that, and it's okay. It's all good, because we reached some kind of an agreement and I stopped feeling like the human tagging along. But... you do realise that you're really hard work sometimes, don't you?" Ianto looked away into the sea and Jack tapped his chin mildly, turning him back to himself. "Look at me," he whispered. "Really look at me. And tell me, do you really think that I'd let you go? Just like that, just because I might suffer later?"

"I'm not worth it." Ianto's voice was hoarse, as if he hadn't used it for weeks. "I'm really not worth the trouble, Jack, because you're right. I've done nothing to justify the effort you're putting into this."

"Let me decide that," Jack said, his voice gentler than it had been in a long time when it came to Ianto. "You are worth the trouble, and you need to understand that, but you also need to speak to me. I can't figure it out just like that. I can't always know what you want or how you feel."

"It's sort of a two-way street, Jack," Ianto reminded softly and the Captain found himself smiling.

"It is. And I know that I'm not the most open of people either, but I swear to you, I'm not hiding anything that's worth mentioning. You would have hated the man I'm keeping hidden from you."

"The same might be true for me." Ianto stared at him for a long moment and Jack raised an eyebrow, requiring further explanation. "We've talked about this once. You probably think I don't remember it, but I do. You miss your Ianto – the one from before the 456 – and I told you that I don't remember most of that; the one before the House of the Dead. You don't want me. As far as I know, you might hate the man I am now."

"I don't," Jack hurried to say. "I just wish you could have an instructions manual sometimes. It's not much fun figuring it out myself."

"I know," Ianto said quietly, twisting his body to face Jack as they sat on the edge and kiss him briefly. "I know. But everything's happening so fast. I feel like I can't stop even for a moment, just to check who I am and what I've become. I'm not really sure about anything anymore. I've lived with the mind of a human for at least two years. I remember Canary Wharf and Lisa and Torchwood and yet sometimes it's like that's never happened at all. Like I've been in the War and suddenly I'm here and... there are days when I wake up and I'm not even sure where I am. I look around, I look at you or at myself and I can't remember my own name. And then this. Regeneration. I had no idea what to do and.."

"I get it," the Captain said carefully, looping an arm around Ianto's shoulders and bringing him closer. "But... you could try, couldn't you? I know that death is still a bit of an open wound and I'm sorry for opening it again, but we could try and get through this together, couldn't we?"

"We could," Ianto conceded carefully, lacing one hand with Jack's free one. He seemed unconvinced, though, and Jack suddenly had an idea.

"Tell you what," he began. "We could get the Doctor to get us to a planet – a peaceful one, where nothing ever happens. He's been proposing a double date for ages, so it'd be a good idea, yeah?"

"Yeah," Ianto echoed and gracefully stood up, bringing Jack with him as they got back on their way to the TARDIS. "And, Jack? I'm sorry."

Jack smiled encouragingly. "It's okay. As long as we make it through this together, it'll always be okay."

Ianto returned the smile hesitantly and the Captain got the feeling that something important was happening in his head right now; some decision invisible to everyone else was being made. "Always."