Author's Notes: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. But I had to separate it into two chapters because otherwise it would get about five thousand words long. Been there, done that, no that much of a good idea. I'm hoping that I'll be able to post the next one today despite the supposedly daily schedule. Worst case scenario is tomorrow morning.

Day Twenty-Four: On One of Their Birthdays

"D'you reckon we should tell them we have to get going?" the Doctor asked, scratching the back of his neck with mild curiosity.

"Nah," Jack said, leaning against the door of the TARDIS and crossing his legs at the ankles. "Leave them to it. They're having fun; why spoil it?"

The idea of Ianto and River alone in the wardrobe made him somewhat uneasy, but Jack repressed it as he thought about their plans for today.

Last night, they had gone to sleep, just to rest before the big day. Considering that the so-called double date was the same day as Ianto's birthday, they all wanted it to be special and plus, he was well aware that Ianto and River liked dressing up for any occasion they got – including a (questionably) human colony that vaguely resembled the early days of America and, even though he and the Doctor hadn't been bothered to change their clothes, he was expecting all sorts of cowboy references and had his fingers crossed against any hats included.

And was, unfortunately, proven wrong seconds later as the two young Time Lords reappeared into the console room, Ianto dressed in loose jeans and a shirt that had seen better days (or was purposefully made to look like it had went through several tornados), a pair of boots and a Stetson that the Captain deeply suspected was the Doctor's. River was wearing a skintight pair of denim shorts and the red plaid shirt that Jack had refused to wear several days back, her usual motorcycle boots up to her knees and, with a blinding smile, she took the hat off Ianto's head and placed it on her own, spinning around for their benefit and throwing the Doctor a questioning look, apparently daring him to voice his opinion.

It was an undeniably attractive scene, whether Jack liked to admit it or not, and it was also one more thing that the two of them shared – Ianto had delighted in the several undercover missions they'd had in Torchwood and Jack was pretty sure that Time Lord psychology couldn't erase that in a person. Every time he'd seen River she was in different clothes, and she seemed to enjoy the roles she played, so Jack thought that it was only fair to let them have fun with it while they could. Especially since they had got it just right; Ianto's clothes were (probably purposefully) too big on him and yet perfectly framing his long thin body, and River's attire outlined every curve of her figure in a way that clearly showed that it had been her intent.

"Yowzah," the Doctor said quietly and Jack agreed with the sentiment with heart and soul, even if his eyes were fixed on Ianto instead of her; Ianto who was currently approaching him with a small smile.

"Birthday and all," he said, as if excusing himself. "Decided to try something new."

"I approve wholeheartedly," Jack assured him and he looked him up and down as Ianto snatched his hat back from where it had been resting on River's curls. "Going to go all Mr Catch-me-if-you-can, aren't you?" He asked with a cheeky smile – one that was returned immediately.

"That would be the plan, Captain."

o.O.o

As it turned out, Ianto wouldn't make a very good cowboy.

Everyone else enjoyed the sunlight. River was lying down, practically soaking up the unusually bright rays, the Doctor was relaxed and even Jack enjoyed it – Ianto liked to drag him only to gloomy, rainy places and the Captain was starting to think that Cardiff had been a perfect habitat for someone like him.

Ianto was currently hiding in the shadows of the nearest tree and had so far resisted any attempt that Jack had made to lure him out under the sun.

"This is supposed to be a picnic. You're meant to have a sunbath. " River said, looking up at him from under the Stetson she'd conquered again. The Doctor had briefly protested against the injustice of everyone getting to wear it except for him, but had been quickly silenced with a kiss from her. Jack wondered absent-mindedly if she had both the Doctor and Ianto wrapped around her little finger because it was a Time Lady thing – who knew, they might have been like sirens – or because, if it hadn't been for his own cautiousness, he'd fall into the trap of those bright, blue-green eyes as well, but his attention snapped back to Ianto as the man shook his head.

"I'm good here. We might want to get back before sunset, though. From what I know, this planet gets really cold once the moon rises."

The Doctor nodded as he took a bite from his biscuit and Jack knew by his expression alone that it was trivia time. "That it does. We're on Petria-4 – relatively small planet but one of the few human colonies that developed a system with countries. That up there," he pointed to the large blue planet hanging in the sky, "Is their only moon. It's covered in deep layers of ice and when the sun goes down, the whole planet basically freezes up. The locals have a clothing system developed especially for that and they've adapted – they're humans, after all. During daytime, though... the temperatures are usually pretty high."

Jack looked around them. There were other people outside, of course, most of them just resting and enjoying their free time like the four of them did. There were mostly humanoids, even several species that Jack couldn't place by name but was sure he had seen before. Everything seemed absolutely normal and yet, there was something out of place. The people were moving, laughing and walking around but everything else was just... frozen.

"Moral of the story," Ianto muttered darkly. "No matter where and when I am, my birthday will be in a day hotter than the eighth circle of Hell."

"Why not the ninth?" Jack asked curiously – Ianto was usually terribly precise with metaphors – only to have River snort. "Because the ninth circle is supposed to be cold, genius."

"Please tell me you've read Dante's Divine Comedy," Ianto said with mock horror in his voice and Jack wanted to defend himself but just then, the Doctor shushed them all.

"What is it?" River asked, tension immediately replacing the light-hearted banter. Jack reached for his gun – more of an instinct than something else – and saw her and Ianto do exactly the same. The Doctor would be pleased. "Something wrong?"

"Look over there," the Doctor nodded to a small squad of uniformed guards – Jack guessed the status by the weapons practically sewed into their clothes – were walking among the people, saying a few words to everyone. The citizens just nodded and gave the guards their arm, after which they let it through some strange sort of scanner, then let them go and moved to the next ones.

Ianto finally stopped lurking in the shadows and came close to them, watching intently. "What do you think's happening?" His voice was quiet and focused and Jack briefly glanced at him to see that he was fully on guard.

"Counting the population, maybe," River suggested. "You know, for statistics."

It did seem to be something like that, because it didn't look like the people were forced into it, neither was it hurting them in any way. Maybe it was just a more advanced system than answering to all the questions they needed online. The last time Jack had seen someone do that was Gwen and Ianto in the Hub as they fussed whether they needed to put something about their job or just leave it at 'unemployed' so no one would ask questions.

Two men from the squad approached them, the first one holding the scanner and the second carrying a small device that probably showed the results. The one with the scanner had pasted a polite smile onto his face as he came closer and took in their borderline hostile expressions.

"Hello," he greeted. "You have nothing to worry about; this is just a routine check." When no one reacted, he made a step closer to them. "So if you would just... thank you," he added quickly when the Doctor silently extended his hand. He went through all of them, then looked at his colleague expectantly.

"Three Time Lords," the man said, still staring at the data he was apparently getting. "Two from Gallifrey, one from the Gamma Forests." Jack looked at River, surprised, and saw that she was frowning and ready to object. "And one human from Boeshane Peninsula." He smiled at them again. "Welcome to Petria-4!"

"Thank you," the Doctor said cautiously. "These scans, what are they for?"

"I told you," the man said with a touch of impatience as he pulled out another scanner out of his uniform. "Just a routine check." He took the Doctor's hand again, running it under the small purple light of his device.

"Marked," the man behind him said and the first guard nodded to himself, moving onto River. "So is she." There was a green light on top of the scanner, Jack noticed just as it approached Ianto and started blinking between red and green. "Unmarked. But... it's his birthday today, sir."

"Really?" The man looked at Ianto and he nodded. "What are you turning?"

"Twenty-six," Ianto said, apparently doing his best not to look like he wanted to fight back.

"Well, what are you waiting for, then? I'll make an exception, but I'll have to come check up on you in a week."

"I don't think I'd be here in a week," Ianto muttered and the man frowned.

"What do you mean? Ghanan is currently closed for visitors." Ghanan was probably the name of the country they were in, Jack thought as the Doctor put in, trying to save the situation, "What he was trying to say was that we're living in the mountain, so it might be hard for you to find us."

Thinking of the Doctor, did all his decisions have to be massively inconvenient, even when he was trying to do someone a favour? It was becoming kind of a habit.

"I'm sure we'll manage," the guard said, reaching for Jack's hand. As the scanner passed over his hand, jack tried to silence the feeling of dread that was rising inside him, but to no avail. Especially when the light turned red and the scanner started screeching quietly, and the guards's eyes hardened. "Unmarked."