Ch. 36

Walter felt better with each step he took back to his house. He practically flung his costume off to rush to the shower. When he came out dressed for work, he was in a good mood. It really did him good to see Laurie -- why had he avoided her to begin with? He couldn't remember anymore, really. Singing, he permitted himself breakfast before he walked slowly to work. It was good to not have to rush into anything, and oh -- even better, today was Saturday. That meant he had the day off tomorrow, and he had a pretty good idea of what he wanted to spend his day doing.

Walter busied himself with thoughts of Laurie that morning as he handled customers and aided Mr. Petersen. In fact, Agent Orange was so far gone out of his mind, all he could think about were his plans for a nice evening talking to Laurie. Now that her mother knew and she didn't actually seem to care as much about him dating her daughter -- as she initially seemed to have been -- he could actually see her without hesitation. It really was a liberating feeling.

At noon, Walter went to the diner across the street and sat down at a booth to order lunch. He was scanning the menu, not really reading it because he was too busy thinking about other things. A shadow passed over him and when he looked up, there was a blond man sitting across from him at his table. His green eyes were staring out at him and his mouth had the slightest hint of a smile. Walter thought he had seen the man before, and the first person he thought of was Ozymandias. But no, Ozymandias didn't have eyes like that.

Oh, right, the man who came to order the sport coat from the store. He remembered now. But looking at him, Walter knew the man wasn't here to talk about garments. In fact, Walter was pretty certain he knew what the man was here to talk about.

"Agent Orange," said Walter curtly, as if he had been expecting him.

"Rorschach," said the Agent, nodding to him. Walter wasn't surprised.

"Here on your lunch break?" asked Walter.

The Agent laughed heartily, though his eyes displayed no warmth.

"Oh, you are quite clever, aren't you? Very good with words, dry sense of humor. Very efficient at dealing out the punches, great strategist and yet two sides of yourself war against another. Really, there is nothing efficient about that. How can there be when you truly can't decide on what you want?"

The words seemed to tumble out of the Agent's mouth as if he were reciting a speech he had memorized. His eyes were still fixed on Walter, and he smiled again, courteously, a smile so much like the ones he left at all his crime scenes. The Agent had such an intriguing face, a face that had something wrong with it, though at first glance he was normal; too normal, in fact. No, his face was fine -- really did remind Walter of Ozymandias -- but it was his eyes that gave him the creeps. There was something missing behind them, as if he was cold inside, only calculating and never truly feeling.

"Why did you attack Nightshade?" Walter asked him.

"Oh, Rorschach, shame on you and shame on me," said the man, shifting in his seat. "I didn't mean to do that -- you know I didn't -- I didn't attack her at all, in fact. She just got in the way, is all. Needed her unconscious, but didn't expect the man to get in the way. No matter, I got rid of him for you, didn't I? I hoped that she would accept my apology as I am really quite sorry in regards to the matter. I do not wish to harm my colleagues in any way."

The Agent did not look at all remorseful as he said these words.

"What are you doing here?" asked Walter.

"I came by to see you -- isn't that what you wanted? You were looking for me, were you not?"

"Yes."

"Think you can catch me, right?"

"Eventually."

"I'm sure. But until then, we'll have so much fun, won't we?"

"Why are you doing this?"

The Agent paused, as if he hadn't expected Walter to ask that question, or at least in the way he did. Walter had asked with interest, in fact. No, it wasn't Walter, but someone else outside of him that was trying so hard to get in. Walter didn't like that. He was awake now, more on guard, and this time he had caught it. He had remembered what Laurie had said to him, and he had been watching this time.

"I told you," said the Agent in a voice that suggested that he was quite tired of Walter's attitude. "I'm working the same way as you lot are, fighting crime, making the world a better place, one step at a time. It's a small world after all."

He sang out the last line in monotonous notes, smiling at Walter and cocking his head as if he were making a joke, but those eyes were still cold and emotionless.

"I have so much fun here," the Agent said, looking around. He was practically vibrating, and his leg was moving up and down in a nervous gesture that made the table move. "Here in this city. See, I was in California before this."

The Agent paused as if to wait for Walter to say something, but Walter was silent, so he continued.

"Was in California -- in fact, was working to make a name for myself. Killed a girl, even. Bates. Have you heard of her? Had everything worked out. All my ducks in order. Then I kept reading about the Crimebusters and you got me so keen on the idea I just couldn't resist."

The Agent held out his hands and smiled at Walter.

"Left the place, came here with a new identity; wanted to join the family. Really wanted to meet the Comedian more than anything. You know how funny he is? Wish I could be more like him one day, but he has a knack for insight that I just don't have. Can't relate to people -- me, not him -- but he can; he's all alone but he makes himself that way. Not born into it like I was, though it took me a while to realize I was different. See?"

The Agent picked up the salt shaker and started to twirl it around the back of his hand.

"Magic," said the Agent, more amused by what he said than by what he was doing. "Really like the Comedian. He makes me laugh. So I thought I'd get a laugh too. Hope he isn't sore about me stealing his image, don't mean to offend -- just a tribute. Just a nod at the genius."

"What did you do to Ozymandias?" Walter asked, finally.

"Oh, him," said the Agent, face distorting in disgust. His eyes were as cold as ever. "Tried to make him see things my way. He actually attacked me, can you believe it? I showed him, though. In the end, he agreed with me; the hypocrite. Sometimes you need a little aid when you don't think you can win by force. Me? I'm no Comedian. Can't defend myself against anything. Know my chemicals though, and know what makes people do things when given the right amount. No offense to your girlfriend, really."

Walter stiffened, a cold feeling rising up in him. Agent Orange knew too much about him, too much about him and Laurie.

"What do you want with me?" Walter asked.

"Don't look at me like that," said the Agent, laughing. "I know I don't know some things but I know that look and I haven't done anything that warranted that look."

Walter said nothing.

"I want to join the Crimebusters," the Agent said, simply.

"Take it up with Metropolis," Walter muttered.

"Want to ask a more respectable member."

"No."

Agent Orange stared at Walter as if he had just spoken in a foreign language. He sighed deeply and appeared quite resigned.

"Very well. Then let the game of wits begin."

"What?" Walter squinted at Agent Orange, hoping by doing this he would make more sense, somehow.

"I'm going to kill more people, Rorschach," said the Agent. "And if you want to stop me, you're going to have to find me, and on my terms, my turf."

"What makes you think I can't just turn you in right now?" asked Walter.

Agent Orange laughed.

"In broad daylight?" he asked, incredulously. "What will you do -- attack me? Tell everyone, look here, it's the Agent Orange, just like you see in the papers. Who will believe you? Nobody. In the end, you will be the one who gets in trouble."

He's right, you know. Better to play along and catch him at his own game. We'll find him; we know how he works now. Shut up -- just, shut up. I don't need your help, whether you think so or not. Fine by me, but when you need me -- really need me, you'll know better than to talk. You'll see, one day you will find that my way is the only way to do things.

No. Walter had his own way too.

"You're a reasonable man," said the Agent. "Not as reasonable as Ozymandias, but you will have to do."

Walter studied Agent Orange's face. He knew how he looked like now. Who looked more sincere? Him? Or the Agent? He calculated their features in his mind, trying to determine which one of them looked less imposing. Agent Orange appeared a bit more easy going, but Walter was still dressed for work and looked respectable.

"Hope you catch me soon, Rorschach," the Agent laughed. "Otherwise you're not going to have much crime left to fight."

Walter felt something stir in him and he fought against it. It made him angry.

"You think you have everything figured out," Walter said, in a cold tone to match the Agent's eyes. "But I'm not Rorschach."

Agent Orange's face twisted into a confused grimace.

"I'm Walter." Walter stood up. "And I don't take shit from anybody. Pardon my French, Mr. Smiley Face."

"What are you--" said the Agent, as Walter slipped around the table and put his hands on him. "What?"

Walter pulled Agent Orange roughly out of the booth and twisted his arms behind him.

"Help!" shouted the Agent. "Murder!"

Everyone was looking at him; at them. Walter nodded to some people and looked them in the eyes.

"He's causing trouble," he told them with as much sincerity as possible. It helped that he was right; just putting it in simple terms, really. Someone nodded, most resumed eating again.

Walter shoved Agent Orange as he ushered him along. He took him outside, where he searched him for anything lethal. Of course he wasn't armed -- he hadn't been expecting a confrontation. The Agent was arrogant, just as Ozymandias had been. The Agent protested and laughed at the same time.

"What are you going to do?" he asked through short bursts of laughter. "Take me to the police station? They'll lock you up with me for being crazy, mister!"

"Shut up," Walter told him.

Agent Orange was surprisingly compliant. Walter marched him through the streets to a familiar house. Walter pushed Agent Orange ahead of him and knocked on the door.

Hollis answered, and looked quite surprised.

"Yes?" he asked Walter uncertainly.

"I found Agent Orange," Walter told him. "Need to arrest him."

"Well, I..." Hollis started to laugh nervously, thinking it was a joke.

"This is Rorschach," Walter said. He had to use Rorschach's voice and he cringed to do it, but it got the message across.

"Oh," Hollis' eyes widened. "But I'm retired."

"Call your friends -- you should know someone on the force that can help. You said so yourself at the dinner, talking to Dan."

"I... all right." Hollis nodded and squinted at Agent Orange. "Are you sure it's him, though?"

"He confessed."

"Oh, Nite Owl, always to the rescue, but always thinking the best about others first," said the Agent. "Read your book, very interesting."

Hollis frowned and paused to stare at the Agent. Walter squeezed the Agent's arms until he shrieked.

"Don't pay attention to him," Walter told Hollis, who nodded.

Hollis went inside, and Walter stayed where he was. He didn't want to do anything too complicated that might compromise his hold on the Agent. Not that he expected him to get away. Under Walter's hands, the murderer's arms were soft. Of course they were. In the end, he was just a lazy killer. What did it matter that he had targeted more unsavory victims? He was still a sick monster masquerading as a man with a cause.

Agent Orange was very reasonable. That was what he had said to describe Ozymandias, but he had been referring to himself, as well. Ozymandias was all logic. Reason always won over men like that. Rorschach was reasonable, too. Governed by strong principles, but all reason nonetheless. Walter wasn't, though. He grew up in a tough neighborhood with a mother who made no sense; had no stability. He had to learn to respond to life through a different approach. Agent Orange had seen two sides of him, but had somehow expected one to dominate the other. Walter didn't appreciate that.

"You'll only revert back," the Agent told him, as if he had been listening to his thoughts. "It wasn't me, but it will be something else, and you'll go back."

Walter just ignored him. He waited until the police arrived and Agent Orange was out of his hands, then returned to work an hour late. Walter felt bad, and was almost prepared to tell Mr. Petersen the truth, even, but the old man was asleep again. A middle-aged couple was standing in the shop. The woman turned to glare at Walter as he entered.

"It's about time," she said. "We're here to pick up our order, and he isn't waking up."

"I'm sorry ma'am," said Walter with an apologetic smile. "Something came up that I had to tend to, I'm afraid."

The woman's anger seemed to abate as she studied Walter.

"Well, that's understandable, I suppose," she said. She smiled at him.

Walter brought the couple their order. They left, satisfied. The lady had even tipped Walter, which surprised him. Alone with his thoughts again, Walter watched Mr. Petersen sleep. The rest of the day was quiet and relaxing. Walter spent most of it sewing buttons onto jacket sleeves. At the end of the day, he woke Mr. Petersen up.

"Oh, my good boy," said the old man, as he stood up. "It's such a lovely day. Why don't you go home early? Be young and free while you can."

Walter started to protest -- he hadn't sweeped up the shop yet -- but Mr. Petersen would have none of it. Walter ended up going to the hospital early to visit Laurie. Walter signed in at the front desk and walked up the stairs and into Laurie's open room door.

"I caught Agent Orange today," Walter announced as he strode in. Laurie was inside, as well as her mother, and Blake, who was off to the side reading the papers.

Blake was the first to react.

"What? Really?" asked Blake, setting the papers aside as if they were on fire. "No shit?"

"No, sir."

"Weren't you supposed to be at work today?" Laurie asked him.

"Yes."

"When did you find time to do it, then?" asked Laurie, frowning.

"I did it on my lunch break."

Laurie started to laugh, but Walter didn't. Laurie stopped and stared as she realized he wasn't joking. It was Blake who laughed when it was apparent that he was serious.

"How the hell did you do it, kid?" the older man asked him.

"I set up a trap," said Walter. "I let him come to me on his terms. I surprised him, though."

"How?" Blake leaned in with interest.

"I made him think I was Rorschach."

Blake laughed and laughed at that.

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To be continued...