A/N: Hi again. I will explain bits at the end, please don't kill me. The songs are formatted the same way as before. Okay I'll let you read now. Let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy it. P.S, I sorted chapter 20 and added a little bit here and there so if you want to go back and read it you can, it will still make sense if you doon't but the whole she can stand on her own isn't so random anymore and I added a bit to the flashbacks.

So on with the next chapter...

Chapter 22

"Well Beca, any thoughts?" Jesse asked his voice holding some venom.

"I- I..." Beca sighed frustrated with herself and her apparent inability to speak in, well any form or sentences. Jesse just nodded, a silent 'that's what I thought' before he put his head down and headed back to the group. As he brushed past her Beca grabbed his arm to stop him.

"No! You don't get to just walk away like that. I'm going to answer, I just need a minute to gather my thoughts okay?"

"You mean decide on your lie." It sounded like a question but it was more of a statement. Beca felt her temper rise.

"Why would I lie?! We've pretty much established that you can tell when I'm lying so really what would be the point?!" She started to raise her voice her anger showing through her tone.

"Fine Beca, what's your story for this one?" He asked his voice suddenly sounding more tired than angry.

"As you are aware I have told you, apparently more than once, why I kept up the lie. I didn't want to lose you, as selfish as it was." She too sounded tired now. "But it wasn't just like that, I couldn't lose you, I didn't know how. I didn't know how to let you go and I didn't know how to live if I did. I still don't know how you did it but in the just under a year we were together you pretty much managed to become my whole world. Then it all came crashing down, at first when I thought you had done it only to discover you hadn't and I'd done it myself as a result. I was devastated, you know that now but you didn't then and I couldn't let you know back then, I wasn't that person."

"And you are now?" He interrupted. "You're so much better now? You don't lie and manipulate anymore?"

"Look Jesse, I'm sorry I set you up that night. I deliberately refused to give you answers until you were too drunk to be able properly react and I thought you were too drunk to remember." She sighed again. "But do you want the real truth of that night? I don't know why I was acting like the war never happened that night, I missed you and it reminded me of the past and it just slipped out before I could stop it. I didn't really intend to tell you what I did when you were in that state. What I said was true but I never meant to tell you like that, I just wanted to get away from you because being near you was messing with my head. It was just supposed to be a distraction, but then you came back, and you pointed out the new Bellas' betrayal and I was drunk and it just tipped me over the edge. It wasn't your fault before you think I blamed you. I was the one who said I would tell you when you were drunk, I was the one who had been drinking and couldn't control my temper." She paused to look him in the eye. "Tell me I'm lying 'cause you know better than anyone if I'm telling the truth." He watched her for a moment before breaking eye contact. She sighed again, she felt totally exhausted now, all the events of the day catching up to her and most of all the fighting.

"I can't believe it was only this morning that we were happy in my bed. Is there any point Jesse? Should I really continue my story? 'cause if it's pointless let me know now and put me out of my misery. I didn't lie in that song. The whole war stemmed pretty much from our break up. The obsession with winning: a need to feel some kind of success, to feel like there was some reason to everything, even just to wake up in the morning. All it did was make that empty feeling so much worse. I spent the last nine and a half years almost moping about on that last stage. I accepted it was my fault but I couldn't move on, I didn't want to. I guess some part of me was convinced you felt the same somewhere deep down. So please Jesse, if I'm wasting my time just let me know, so I can finally let you go, move on." Her weariness was clear in her voice. She paused and sighed for what felt like the millionth time since this conversation/argument or whatever it was started. He just stayed silent. "Please Jesse just let me know. If it's pointless just tell me. I don't want to keep talking about it if it is. I need to forget it all and move on if that's the case but I need you to say it. I haven't really asked you or needed you to do anything for me at all this week, not from you specifically, so please just grant me this. What do you feel?" She begged of him. He opened his mouth to speak when Fat Amy came up to them and put a hand on each of their shoulders pointing them back to the group.

"It's your turn to sing Jesse." She explained as she pushed him ahead towards the circle. She then turned to Beca and put her arm around her to help support her. "You okay flatbutt?" Beca looked at her in surprise.

"I haven't heard you say that since we arrived this week."

"Yeah, well. I got kids now, got to at least try to bring them up right but you looked like you needed a reminder of the good old times. Actually it was Bumper who suggested it would be a bad name for the kids to pick up. You wouldn't imagine him being the serious parent would you?" Amy explained.

"No, definitely not, but honestly it's hard to imagine each of you like that. I guess one of you have to do it. Might as well be him."

"How's things with Jesse going?"

"I don't even know if there's any point in trying anymore." She explained with yet another sigh.

"I'm sorry flatbutt, but don't give up just yet, you don't know what's going through his head."

As they reached the log circle they both sat down on the log that Beca and Jesse had previously been occupying before she was called to sing.

"Amy. About what I said earlier today-" Beca started in a whisper but they were suddenly both distracted when Cynthia Rose stood up and joined Jesse in the centre. He had asked her to lead his song of choice with him. It was causing a stir for several reasons. No one had sung a duet yet and no one had picked someone of the opposite sex to sing with, even as just back up. As they started to sing Beca felt her heart sink, it felt like her world was crumbling for the second time in her life.

"Here's the thing we started out friends
It was cool but it was all pretend
Yeah yeah
Since U Been Gone"

"Your dedicated you took the time
Wasn't long till I called you mine
Yeah Yeah
Since U Been Gone"

"And all you'd ever hear me say
Is how I pictured me with you
That's all you'd ever hear me say"

"But Since U Been Gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you (thanks to you)
Now I get (now I get)
What I want
Since U Been Gone"

"How can I put it? You put me on.
I even fell for that stupid love song
Yeah, yeah
Since U Been Gone"

"How come I'd never hear you say
I just wanna be with you
I guess you never felt that way"

"But Since U Been Gone
I can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on
Yeah, yeah
Thanks to you (Thanks to you)
Now I get (Now I get) what I want
Since U Been Gone"

"You had your chance (you had your chance) you blew it
Out of sight, out of mind
Shut your mouth I just can't take it
Again and again and again and again"

"Since U Been Gone
Since U Been Gone
Since U Been Gone
Since U Been Gone
Since U Been Gone"

He was among the last to sing while they had been gone a few others had sung, one of the Trebles had gone with 'Ronnie' by Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons. It had strangely hit home with Beca from the bit she had heard when she had followed Jesse. Another one sang about a more current time with 'Hold Me Now' by Thompson Twins. Someone else also did The Beatles' 'Yesterday' about how they had lost a girlfriend when they had become a Treble purely because she was a fan of the Bellas so she had left him. One Bella sang 'We are not Alone' by Karla DeVito, a song hated to admit she recognised from The Breakfast Club, from one Bella who was against the war, she was a current one who clearly had fallen for a Treble and didn't see all the differences between the Bellas and the Trebles that the others claimed existed. There had also been a few songs by The Script after Beca had sung one. So far there had been: 'If You Ever Come Back', 'Nothing' and 'Exit Wound'. Some of the songs were about Bellas while others were about life after college.

He had watched Beca the whole time he was singing. It was pretty dark out now, in fact Beca had heard someone mention it being nearly 11pm, and they had yet to have dinner so it had been decided that after Jesse had sung his song they would prepare some sort of food to eat. Beca used this excuse so the moment he finished singing she got up and Fat Amy, understanding what had just happened, helped her over to her tent that someone had kindly erected, and delivered her bags to, for her while she was unable to do it herself. Once Beca was settled safely in her tent Amy stayed outside as a 'guard dingo', so no one (Jesse) could bother her. She heard him follow them and Amy prevent him from coming in for which Beca was very thankful. She just couldn't deal with him right now. She wasn't sure if she ever would be able to.

Beca was beyond sick of crying now, that didn't seem to stop the tears, but she was still very sick of them all the same. She hadn't expected Jesse to do it like that. Still, at least now she knew. Wasn't that what she wanted after all? To know how he felt. Well, now she did. He was done with her. All the lies had finally split them up for good. She curled up on top of her sleeping bag and tried to think of something else. She found herself wandering back in time again.

Fourth Year at Barden

All the Bellas were gathered in the converted gym for their first practice with the new Bellas. Beca had them all sat on their chairs waiting for the meeting to commence. Once they were all sat down Beca started to cast her eyes over them all. Not one of them was absent even though most of them had broken the oath.

"How many of you were Trebleboned last night?" Beca asked deciding to just go with blunt. There was some shuffling but no one spoke up. "I know the answer I just wanted to give you a chance to come forward." She said in a disappointed but hard tone. "Dolly, Polly, Molly, Olivia and Nicola, I'm disappointed in you. You all broke the oath. You are hereby disinvited. Hand over your scarves, take your chairs and go." Beca instructed.

She had really been talking to Aubrey way too much. They all did as she said. Some with a huff and others with tears. Never had this many Bellas been simultaneously kicked out and now the Bellas were too low on numbers to compete. Still Beca wasn't done. "Donna, I expected more from you, you too broke the oath and are hereby disinvited from the Bellas, please turn in your scarf and go."

Donna just stared at Beca's expectant face for a moment before doing as Beca asked, tears threatening to fall, explaining how it was an accident. Beca just shook her head at her. The few remaining Bellas just sat there in shock until Donna had left.

"What the hell Beca?!" Fat Amy demanded.

"They broke the oath!" Beca defended.

"But Beca, we don't have enough numbers to compete now." Jane added gently. Her input had surprised Beca, she normally just sat back, still she didn't let it deter her.

"We will just have to hold new auditions" Beca decided on the spot. Truthfully the predicament with the Bellas breaking the oath had kept her up much of the night after Jesse had pointed it out to her. After many hours Beca had finally realised that regardless of their numbers they just had to go. She also knew that was exactly what the Trebles' plan had been about, taking away their group members and weakening them while also making them unfit for competition as they didn't qualify. Beca still had to do it even if it did meant the Trebles won that battle, she would just have to think of a way to fix her numbers problem. And now the solution had finally come to her. They would hold new auditions for the Bellas.

"How are we supposed to do that?" asked Amanda, "We can't just set up new auditions without any warning. No one will turn up."

"I guess we could take the ones we had to turn down before." Gemma suggested. Beca wasn't exactly thrilled by that idea but it was quite true, auditions couldn't be just thrown together and besides all the same people would probably audition. Some of the ones they had turned down had been quite good but a lot hadn't been. They needed 5 new Bellas.

"Anna, Hannah and Sara were quite good. We almost took them instead." Fat Amy suggested.

"But the rest were terrible." Amanda commented. Lily also mentioned something about picking a couple and Beca sincerely hoped the part about stuffing them was just her ears playing tricks on her.

"Okay, we only need 2, so which 2 were least terrible?" Beca asked the others for their opinions.

"Well, Rachel and Bethany are a little tone deaf but won't fight you and are pretty good dancers. Erica and Lillian can hit the notes better but they attract attention and not the good kind while Natalie, Tracy and Vicky look okay and that will probably distract from their singing but they can also fade into the background. And Natalie isn't opposed to lip syncing or miming instead of singing." Fat Amy gave them all a run down.

"I guess we could take Natalie and Rachel while we try to look for some others." Beca decided, with little other choice the others just nodded their agreement.

They all knew they needed to start new rehearsals with the new girls as soon as possible, especially considering not all of them were up to the usual standard. This meant doing a second initiation and they needed to do it straight away. As there were 5 of them now and they had picked 5 new ones it meant they each had to 'kidnap' one. After finding out they were all free each Bella went to pick up their assigned 'chosen one'. Soon they were all lined up for their initiation as Beca made them take the oath. One main difference this time was that they all seemed a little more desperate to be there, it gave Beca more confidence that they wouldn't break the oath. They may have suffered a severe blow but they weren't about to let the Trebles win. Beca wasn't backing down.

Beca could hear them all being called to dinner. She was starving but she didn't want to face Jesse just yet. She could hear him outside talking to Amy. It appeared that he wanted to talk to Beca but Amy still had no intentions of letting him anywhere near Beca, she knew there was a reason Fat Amy was her friend despite the regular rather creepy comments often surrounding dingoes. She wasn't exactly sure what Amy's obsession with dingoes was about but she remembered Stacie mentioning once that she had asked and would now forever wish she hadn't, coming from Stacie that meant something, even Lily had avoided the subject. Eventually Beca decided her hunger won out. She sat up and wiped her eyes; fishing in a bag she found a mirror and fixed her makeup, not that there was much to fix after all the crying she had done today. She hadn't realised what a mess she had become and she hadn't had time to sort herself out since they left the Barden campus that morning. She still couldn't believe that only last night Jesse had told her that he didn't want to spend the rest of his life without her and now just moments ago, it seemed, he had said he was glad she was gone and was happier without her. Once she was sufficiently happy with her appearance she decided it was time to make her exit.

"Amy, I'm coming out!" She shouted to her friend and apparent body guard.

"Alright, just a second!" Amy yelled back before shouting for someone whose name Beca couldn't quite make out. "Okay you can come out now." Amy shouted again after a minute. Beca immerged from the tent to find someone else waiting to escort her to the food while Amy apparently was fending off Jesse who now decided he wanted to talk.

"Beca-" he started.

"No! I don't even want to look at you right now, just leave me alone." She interrupted him before leaving with her escort before he could say or do anything else while Amy stopped Jesse from following.

"I really messed up this time didn't I?" He asked turning to Fat Amy. It was more of an observation than a question.

"Yep. You messed up big time. Looks like if you don't really feel how she thinks you feel then you've got some apologising to do."

"Yeah," he sighed rubbing the back of his neck with one hand as he watched her go, "Yeah, I do."

As I said please don't kill me. The song you may recognise from the soundtrack. It wasn't fond of the song when I first bought it but now it is my favourite from the ones I bought, which is most of the songs off the CD. I will remind you that the songs can represent any period of their lives since joining. It doesn't necessarily mean that's how he feels now and he did sort of want to hurt Beca, if we remember his flashback he was a little unstable. As I have said in response to reviews, they have a bit of a role reversal going on right now.

So thank you OneShotWoman15, you're awesome. Who suggested all the songs in this chapter apart from Since U Been Gone and had also put up with a lot of my babbling and helped me if I have been a bit stuck. You may have noticed I didn't use one of your songs, I have other plans for it. I hope the others were used okay.

Right for my questions. I keep asking them in hope that at some point someone will answer them. Do you think Beca and Jesse should have a little none malicious prank war? When/if they are on better terms of course. Should the Bellas find out how Beca just lied to them. What do you think she almost told Fat Amy?

Now the out of curiousity questions: What do you think happened at graduation? What do you think about the Trebles' latest prank and Beca's response to it? How do you think Jesse feels about Beca now?

Let me know what you think. I hope you enjoyed it, if you review I will give you a mini summary of next chapter (fact not bribe) and see you in the next chapter. (*smiles*)