A/N: Another one in only two months! Woo. And I remember the days were 2 updates week were slow. God, what have I come to. Anyway, yes I have once again updated. Chapter 33 of 35. Yay, we're getting there. And I can't believe it's been about a year since I started this story, though I'm gonna miss it when its gone. But we aren't there yet so let's not think about it. And apparently I'm back to babbling. So, again there's quite a lot of flashback but we're nearly through that. So I guess I'll leave you to read it now. Let me know what you think, I hope you enjoy it and see you at the bottom.

Disclaimer: I do not own Pitch Perfect or its characters etc...

So on with the next chapter...

Chapter 33

Fourth Year at Barden

Beca slowly began to stir from a deep sleep. She couldn't recall a night in recent times when she had slept so well, even taking into account the alcohol. As she lifted her head from the pillow she was greeted with the very fortunate knowledge that this time she had managed to escape a hangover. Strange considering the amount she drank the night before. That was blurry. It was upon trying to recall those memories that she realised exactly what she had been using for a pillow. Or rather who she had been using for a pillow. It wasn't a feeling she was used to anymore and as she looked down at his face she felt panic rising. She had slept with Jesse! Her mind began to race. 'Didn't he have a girlfriend? How had this happened? Didn't he hate her? Oh god, what had she told him? Or done to him?' Suddenly all her thoughts came to a halt as one realisation sets in. He could wake up any minute. She had to get out of there. Quickly. Before he woke up. It was then that she realised her next task.

Somehow she had managed to end up trapped between Jesse and the wall. That meant she would have to climb over him to get out of bed. She couldn't help but wonder if he had put her in this position on purpose. She could almost vaguely remember him saying something to that effect but she couldn't be sure whether it was something her mind had cooked up or whether it was from a time he used to joke about it when they had first got together. Slowly and carefully she extracted herself from his side, her body instantly missing the skin contact, then proceeded to climb over him. Once she was safely stood up on the other side of the bed she sighed in relief. Quickly she gathering her clothes that were scattered around the room. She then began to get dressed as quickly and quietly as she could. She wasn't accustomed to this kind of behaviour, she just knew she couldn't stay. She wasn't ready for this. She didn't know how to deal with it, she couldn't. She silently crept across the room to the door and gently opened the door, sneaking out. She couldn't help but look back at his sleeping form. Memorizing his face as she was sure this would be the last time she would ever see it. The idea pained her and almost made her run back and climb into bed with him again but she stopped herself. Forcing herself to close the door. She couldn't do this to him, not after everything she had already put him through. She had to let him go, let him make his own fresh start. Without her. She felt a tear run down her cheek before she promptly wiped it away. She didn't get to cry about this. It was her own fault after all. As she turned to leave she came face to face with Benji.

The announcing of the winners seemed to take forever to Beca, 'and probably for everyone else,' she thought to herself. Finally after a long speech praising them all for their effort and team work and deeming the week a success they started to announce the placing. Beca noticed the third place team was one of the newest groups of Bellas and Trebles. It was hardly surprising when she thought about it, they were all used to this kind of thing; these performances. Some of the groups hadn't performed in nearly a decade. They were beyond out of practice. This was why Beca nearly missed it when her team was awarded second place. The cheers from all round was nearly deafening and she couldn't help but feel this victory, even if it wasn't a first place victory but a second, meant so much more than the ICCA's ever had. Because this one was about more than a competition. Perhaps their first ICCA win could compare, but even then, there was something extra special about this one. Maybe because they were competing with their friends. Maybe because she was working with Jesse too and here he was standing beside her, celebrating with her. Maybe it was because it seemed to signify the end of the war or that she'd finally gotten Jesse, the love of her life; if you liked that kind of thing, back. Perhaps it was all of them.

She was quickly nominated to accept their trophy, though not as grand as the one she had raised in the past she still held it high with all the same pride as she handed it to her group. The first place group was another group Beca recognised to be current Bellas and Trebles. Once the initial celebrations on stage and in the changing rooms had taken place they had been moved to a hotel where it was announced by their mysterious organisers that a number of rooms had been reserved for them as had a function room for them to host their usual celebratory party. Upon reaching the room the alcohol had immediately started flowing. Beca however couldn't help but want to forego this party. It was not that she wasn't happy or in a celebrating mood. It was more that she felt she needed to talk with Jesse. That they needed to sort through the last of their problems, so that they may finally move forward.

She was however under no delusions that she would be able to get her wish anytime soon. She was after all one of the runners up and not to mention famous for her part in the history of the Bellas, and to some degree the Trebles too. In fact the moment she had walked into the room she had been dragged away by the Bellas to celebrate 'girl style' as one of them called it, and Jesse too had been dragged away by the Trebles. One thing Beca noted however was that even though they had initially split when they entered there was little disdain towards each other and after the initial promises to 'have a night to remember (or to not be able to remember)' they had all integrated quickly and Beca had finally been able to find Jesse.

"Hey, there you are." She said as she managed to grab his arm and pull him to the side.

"Hey," he responded lightly.

"Feel like getting out of here and carrying on our talk?" She offered, trying to keep it light but the implications of her words automatically weighed it down.

"Sure," Jesse agreed. "Though be warned, they made me take a shot." He explained nodding to a group of the Trebles, Bumper being one of its members.

"Okay," Beca began to lead him out the room, "shall we get a room?" She sounded a little hesitant. Jesse nodded and gave his details to the receptionist, ordering a room with a double bed. Beca couldn't help but smile at that. She was fairly certain that he wouldn't make her sleep alone but the fact that he was planning that in advance warmed her heart a little.

Upon reaching the room Jesse let them in and Beca made a beeline for the bed and sat down, indicating for him to follow suit, which he did.

"So, Graduation..." Beca started but trailed off unsure how to continue.

"I don't think we really need to rehash what happened that night." Beca nodded at his suggestion, figuring it was partly because she couldn't remember much and assumed neither could he. "But I do want answers for the next morning." He went on, his tone serious.

"Okay, you're right." Beca nodded, though she was dreading this part. "You do deserve answers." She paused gathering her thoughts, Jesse waited silently for her to continue, she took a deep breath then started again. "I was scared. I knew how I felt but I didn't know how you felt. I couldn't remember much of the night before. I mean, last I checked you still had a girlfriend. And we hadn't spoken properly in years. And you seemed to hate me and I loved you. And I panicked. And-"

"It wasn't true." Jesse interrupted.

"What?" Beca asked confused.

"I didn't hate you. I hadn't got a girlfriend. We had broken up. We had a fight about it earlier that night."

"I remember seeing you together that night, that's when I started drinking and things got blurry."

"Yeah, that was our fight. She accused me of not being over you. Maybe she was right. I don't know, she thought that was why we broke up."

"Was it?" She couldn't stop herself.

"At the time no, looking back now, maybe, probably. I think I told you that we had broken up. I remember us fighting."

"I remember being so jealous, I'm not surprised I went after you eventually."

"I never hated you either Beca. I always loved you. I guess that's what I really hated. That I couldn't stop."

"I always thought you did. That's why I had to leave. I couldn't stay and face you. I didn't know how and I wasn't strong enough then either."

"I never regretted what happened that night, I wasn't ever mad at you for that. But I was so angry that you just left while I was sleeping. Guess my memory of that night is better than yours." He commented referring to the fact that he remembered what she didn't.

"That's why you were so upset when you thought I was doing the same at the beginning of this week." She put it together.

"Yeah, I guess. Though at the same time I think I wished you had just done it. It would have been so much easier. I really didn't want to talk to you or deal with you at all. At the same time I couldn't help myself every time I looked at you. Just like before."

"That's why you avoided me." She voiced her realisation.

"Yeah. You know you told me you loved me." He told her, referring to Graduation night again.

"Oh god, I did?" She couldn't hide her embarrassment. "I'm not all that surprised really. Horrified, but not surprised."

"Don't be, I'm kinda glad you did. Even if it did make me more angry at you to start with. It helped after. Made me realise I wasn't just a meaningless one night stand to you. Even if that's what it felt like at the time. It helped me realise you had to have another reason. I just really wanted to know what it was and it annoyed me that you wouldn't let me find out."

"I was just so scared. You know I turned back before I closed the door, thinking I'd never see you again. It was so hard not to just change my mind and run back to you."

"I wish you had."

"I know I couldn't. I still had so many problems. It took me so long to sort them all out. To be ready. Even if it was a hard 7 years and I often regret a lot of it, I couldn't change it. I wouldn't be here, we wouldn't be here, if I did. You know I almost didn't leave..."

Fourth Year at Barden

"Benji..." She whispered. She was caught red-handed.

"Beca." He sighed. She could feel the disappointment in his tone.

"I'm sorry Benji it's just..." She started to make excuses before she stopped herself. After what she had done to him with the fire she couldn't lie to him now. "Can we talk?" She asked hopefully, though prepared for disappointment. To her relief he nodded. Then again, Benji had always been too nice to refuse. She followed him through to the couches near the entrance and they both sat down. "I made a mistake Benji. I know that. I never understood what you meant before but I do now."

"Beca, you can't just sleep with him then leave him like this." He pleaded "He deserves better, you both do."

"I know he does. But I can't give him that. I can't be what he deserves. Not after everything I've put him through. And besides, I'm pretty sure he hates me now." She stated sadly, clearly holding back her tears. She wouldn't cry about this. Not this time.

"Beca, surely you know he-"

"I mean it Benji. I can't do this to him. I understand that now. I know what you mean. I couldn't do it before when I should have, but I can do it now. I can let him go. You were right. We both have to move on. And I'm going to let us both do that now. Like I should have in the first place."

"Beca-" Benji's voice was full of sorrow at her words.

"Better late than never right? I have to Benji, I need to do this. Please, just don't tell him. We both deserve to put this behind us and start fresh and this is the perfect opportunity. I got a job in L.A. just like I always wanted, and he... It's just better this way. Please, just wish me luck and let me go." She was almost in tears and Benji seemed to sense it so instead he just nodded and gave her a quick hug, being one of the few that could.

"Good luck Beca. I hope you find what you're looking for." She nodded before extricating herself from the hug and heading out the door. As it banged shut behind her Benji whispered after her. "But he still loves you..."

"He never did tell me." Jesse confirmed. "I looked for you at the Bella house but you were gone. Someone told me you'd gone to L.A. I'd missed you."

"If you really wanted me you could have followed. You didn't I took it was a sign you'd moved on. That you didn't care about me. I mean, I figured your career would take you there at some point so if you really did love me and wanted to try, if that night meant anything to you then you'd find me there and... I don't know." She trailed off feeling silly for even thinking such a thing.

"I thought about it you know. Getting on a plane, coming after you. I just couldn't do it. I figured you'd run for a reason: it didn't mean anything to you. By the time I figured it probably wasn't that it was way too late. Years even, if I turned up then you'd have wondered why it took me so long and I couldn't answer. Besides, I figured you'd moved on by then and I should do the same."

"God, we were so stupid weren't we?" Beca laughed slightly.

"Yeah I guess we were." He agreed. Beca yawned. "Ready for bed?" he laughed. She scowled slightly but nodded all the same. He held the quilt back for her to climb into bed before climbing in behind her and pulling her close as she snuggled into his chest.

After Graduation

Beca sat in her window seat as the last passengers were called to board the plane. She had immediately gathered her stuff and fled to the airport. She hadn't even said a proper good bye to anyone and had barely let anyone know where she was going. Still as she watched the world outside her window begin to move all she could think about was that she was leaving Jesse behind. She felt her heart break as the tears silently fell unchecked down her face. Her face turned away, hiding it from the world.

Okay, yes admittedly there were some sad parts in the chapter but I think it came out okay really. As I said, I know there's quite a lot of flashbacks but as you can probably tell we are about caught up. So, I will cut my babbling short here and see you next time. Let me know what you think, I hope you enjoyed it and see you in the next chapter. (*smiles*)