She went home and lay down on the couch, staring at the ceiling fan. Pregnant. A baby. A family. Another being to look after in the future. The future. The thoughts just kept swirling around in her head, over and around, repeating themselves. What should she tell him? Should she tell him? What would she do with a child?
She thought of Suna, of Aki, of Temari. Tears sprang to her eyes and she shook her head. How could she tell him? It would be like trying to lay claim to him. They would think she was just trying to keep him by her side. She didn't want that. He couldn't leave Suna. She couldn't leave Konoha. Why had she gotten herself into such a hopeless relationship? And now this; why had she let this happen?
"I always thought I was so smart." She laughed, tears streaming out of her eyes.
She couldn't tell him. She'd keep this her secret. A child of her own. After all, a long distance relationship with Gaara? He'd probably lose interest in her soon enough. It would be okay; she knew she could live without him, just as he could live without her. They would drift apart, and she would have a child; he never needed to know.
She thought of Kurenai, and her child. Kurenai was okay; she was happy now, with Asuma's child. Sakura should be happy; Gaara was still alive. She tried to stop crying, thinking that way, she really tried. But it was so hard, and it hurt so much.