So I really want to make this story good, so if you think I'm doing anything wrong or have any suggestions please let me know!
The next morning I heard Roman whispering my name and lightly shaking me I rolled over and looked at him annoyed.
"What is it?" I said
"Calm down girl" he chuckled "I'm just heading to the gym and then to get some food and wanted to know if you wanted to come?"
I looked at the time and saw 9:30 I groaned and got up walking to my luggage to pick out work out clothes and my outfit for the day.
"I'll take that as a yes" Roman said while I walked into the bathroom
"Oh no that's fine take your time, I'll wait here" I heard him say through the door. I rolled my eyes and put on blue nike shorts and a black nike workout top and running shoes, I put my hair, long brown, into a high bun and packed black ripped skinny jeans and a black tank top for later and decided I'd just get my make up down at the arena.
I walked out the bathroom and over to the door opened it and turned around staring at Roman.
"Oh so we can go now my queen?" he asked while walking past me, i playfully slapped him on the arm and he laughed.
We worked out for about 2 hours. We both were really into working out and just lost track of time, we both showered at the gym, separtely of course then drove over to Chipotle to get some food. We ordered and took our food to go sit outside.
"So why don't you do cross fit with Seth anymore?" Roman asked me while taking a bite of his food.
"It's not my kind of work out. I mean it's a good one and I learned a lot while working out there with Seth but I like lifting weights and doing treadmills more. " I shrugged.
Before he could answer 3 teens walked up to us gawking over Roman.
"Can we get an autograph?!" one said excitedly. Roman put his fork down smiled and said of course while he was signing autographs the one in the middle looked back and forth between us and looked confused. After he handed them their autographs on napkins she looked at him and said "Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure thing, what's up doll?" he gave her his undivided attention.
"Are you two dating outside the ring?" my eyes went wide and I looked down at my food and started eating.
"Oh um..no, she's just a good friend I'm engaged."
"Oh my God! I'm so jealous of her!" the girl squeeled and Roman just did an awkward smile.
Her friend looked at her surprised then grabbed her arm "Sorry to interrupt you two, we just wanted to get autographs thank you" she said while pulling her friend away.
"Well...that was weird" he said while looking at me.
"I know.. you'd think with how into your life fans are they'd know you were engaged."
"With all the rumors they like to make up they'll never know the truth"
"Except you just told them."
"Is something wrong with that?"
"No not at all, it's the truth after all right?"
"Then what's with the change in your attitude?"
"What are you talking about? My attitude didn't change"
"Yeah seems like it" he stared at me intently, I always got nervous when he did it's like he was searching for something and it always made me uncomfortable. I looked down at my food and started to move it around.
"I just thought you were more private than to tell 3 random girls you're engaged. Just surprising is all"
"That's all?"
"Yeah.. i'm full and it's almost 1" I said looking at my watch "we should head back to the hotel to get our stuff, check out and everything."
Roman just looked at me for a few tense moments before he nodded and packed up his food and we walked to the car and headed back to the hotel.
I finished packing all my stuff before Roman so I went to stand in the lobby and wait for him, Seth and Dean. I already checked out for me and Roman and saw Dean doing the same. When he finished he walked up to me and smiled.
"Hey Rox!" he said while smiling.
"Hey Dean.." i said quietly
"What's wrong girl?" he asked while looking at me concerned.
"Nothing." I responded and looked at my phone. Dean was always a good friend and knew when to drop things so he started playing around with his phone.
I don't really know what was wrong. Ever since our lunch got interrupted I just felt kinda down, not really sad more just blah and I didn't even know why. I started feeling more and more sad so I walked in front of Dean and just stared at him until he looked up from his phone.
"You okay?" he asked and put his phone in his back pocket I looked down for a second then just walked up to him and put my arms around his midsection and rested by head on his chest and let out a big sigh. Instead of questioning me he just wrapped his arms around my back and ran one hand through my hair comfortingly.
We were there for a few minutes with Dean just hugging me. I was always so grateful to Dean he saved me from my past and never left me. I really did love him. I heard Roman and Seth's voice and hugged Dean a little tighter. Seth went to go check out so Roman came up to me and Dean.
"Hey Dean, Rox you okay?" He asked while lightly touching my back. I nodded my head and moved my head to where i was face first into Deans chest. I heard Roman whisper to Dean asking him what was wrong and felt Dean shrug and just rub his hand up and down my back as I sighed again.
"Ready to go guys?" Seth asked, I let go of Dean grabbed my bags and started walking to the car. Roman and me usually sat in back while Dean sat in front if Seth was driving when Roman was about to climb into the back seat I cleared my throat and said "Rome..do you mind if Dean sits back here with me?"
Dean and Seth looked at each other confusingly while Roman looked at me questioningly.
"Uh sure..." he said and went to the front seat.
Seth climbed in the drivers seat while me and Dean climbed in the back. I scooted close to Dean and put my head on his shoulder. I felt someone staring at me and looked in the review mirror to see Roman eying me, I closed my eyes and acted like I was sleeping all the way to the arena.
When we pulled up to the arena I got my stuff out of the car and walked straight into the building, when I stopped to look at the map to see where the divas locker room was I felt a hand on my shoulder I turned around to see Roman standing there.
"Rox..talk to me. What's wrong?"
"Nothing" I said while looking at him.
"Stop lying to me!" he kind of yelled. Roman rarely ever yelled at me and i had issues with yelling so I flinched.
He took a deep breath and looked down at me "I'm sorry for yelling okay. I just hate when somethings wrong and you won't tell me. You always stop for fans and you ignored so many out there, you were hugging Dean like he was your life saver, and you didn't even want to sit with me.." he trailed off.
"Well...technically he is my life saver." I said but the way Roman looked at me I could tell he was frustrated but concerned. "Dean's my best friend and I just needed him. He makes me feel better."
"I'm your best friend too right? Do I not make you feel better?"
"Wait..are you jealous of Dean?" I asked
His eyes went wide for a moment before he composed himself "No. I'm just saying you pulled away from me and have given me the cold shoulder since lunch."
"I'm sorry. My mood just dropped. You know how often that happens. Nothing against you Rome really. It's just Dean has put up with that for years so naturally I go to him. It's nothing okay?" I looked at him. He seemed to be questioning me but finally just said okay and walked off. I think I hurt him but I'm not sure how.
I walked into the divas locker room and sat in the corner looking at my hands. For some reason I felt completely alone. Obviously I had Dean but if I told him the events leading up to my mood dropping he would lecture me, Nikki would lecture me, Roman would probably look at me like I had three heads and never talk to me again, and even though Seth and Cesaro were my friends we were the friends who you are only friends with because of mutuals. I just wanted someone to hold me and tell me what I was feeling and thinking because I didn't even know.
After the Smackdown tapings we all walked to the car and put our bags in.
"Since I'm wide awake I figured I'd drive us to the next city and you guys can take over tomorrow sound good?" Seth asked us and we all nodded.
While Seth climbed into the drivers seat Roman and Dean both looked at me.
"I don't care who sits back there with me ok?" I said and walked off to get in. Roman climbed in the back with me and we were off. It felt tense in the car. Well to me it felt tense but to those 3 it seemed fine they were laughing and joking and having a good time.
When we finally arrived to the next hotel in the next city we all checked in and got in the elevator. Dean and Seth were on the third floor while Roman and mines room was on the fifth before Dean got off the elevator he hugged me and told me to text him if I needed anything. When the doors shut the elevator filled with awkwardness and I hated it. We made it to our room and I took my usually spot, the bed furthest from the door and Roman grabbed some things from his luggage and went into the bathroom. I heard the shower running so i put on some loose black sweats and an over sized TWLOHA shirt , put my hair in a ponytail and crawled into bed.
Suddenly I felt tears running down my face and hugged the pillow next to me extra tight and started crying. I didn't hear the shower stop or the bathroom door open, I sniffled and next thing I knew Roman was kneeled down beside my bed staring at me. I looked up at him and he started wiping my tears away with his thumbs.
"Sweetheart.. Talk to me."
I sat up and he sat down on the bed next to me. I pulled my knees to my chest wrapped my arms around them and just stared at the wall. I felt him put his arm around my shoulder and squeeze it.
"Rome... I don't know what's wrong.." I just kept staring at the wall.
"How can you not know what's making you cry Rox? I don't get it."
I sighed and looked at him then back to the wall.
"I just don't.. I felt fine earlier but now I'm...I'm just not okay."
"Not okay how?"
"I .. forget it Roman it's all okay" I shrugged his shoulder off of me and laid down on my side. I felt the weight in the bed shifting then Roman pulled my arm til I was lying on my back. He was lying on his side his hand holding up his head staring at me.
"It's not okay Rox. You're crying, that's never okay in my book" he said while looking down at me.
"I feel alone.." I whispered
"You're not alone. Not ever. You have me, Dean, Nikki, Seth, Cesaro and so many others."
"I know.. but I feel alone." I rolled over on my side and held my head up like he was and looked in his eyes.
"I can't explain why but I do. I just feel unimportant and alone. Like I have all these feelings and thoughts swirling around and I don't even know what they are but they make me feel like no body cares. No matter how many times people say they're there for me I just keep feeling like they're going to leave eventually.."
"I am never going to leave you. Rox..you're my best friend, you're the one who keeps me strong on this road, without you I would have lost my mind."
"You want me around because you need me."
"I do need you"
"So if you didn't... you wouldn't keep me around..."
"That's not true Rox. I need you but I want you around too. You are just this amazing girl. You're such a protector, once you care you will go to hell and back for people, you make people earn their trust with you, you make them feel important like they make a difference and mean something, you have..this light about you that just brightens my day. And that's why I need you but girl don't take this wrong, you're grumpy as fuck in the morning, you hold it against people what have happened to you in the past, you have a temper problem and have a smart ass mouth at wrong times some times"
I looked at him shocked and was about to say something before he put his finger up to my lips.
"But even when you show your flaws, when you're yelling at me because the traffic light turned red, i STILL want you around, and I think that shows how much you mean to me, yeah you bring a lot of positivity to my life and I love you for that but don't think just because i appreciate all that and need it, don't think that's why I'm your friend because even on your worst days and with your worst attitudes I still want you around."
I just stared at him for a bit before i wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly instantly he hugged me back.
"I love you Rome" I said into his ear, I felt him smile against my cheek, kiss it then he said "I love you too"
My heart skipped a beat and I knew this was eventually going to lead to trouble but I didn't care right now all I cared about was how much better he made me feel.