A/N: okay so this is the third chapter and I thought it would be a good idea to do a bit on Edward's POV. I think he has a lot to say, but it's up to you to decide if I ever do it again…
And since I do know how annoying an author's note can be I'm going to try to keep it short.
I'd like to thank my awesome friends for helping me come up with ideas and not getting bored with my constant babbling!!...and thank you for the reviews…I feel so honored…and yeah I know that sounded lame…and as much as this hurts me I have to say it though…
Disclaimer: I do not own twilight *tears*, but a girl can dream right?
Chapter 3: Edward's POV
"We all decide our own path, each decision we make brings us closer tour goal", those words have haunted me ever since Carlisle said them to me. I never thought about it before but it does feel like there is a path for me, one that I haven't set foot on, like a million strings keep me moving, but unlike what Carlisle said, my decisions hold me back.
Take Jessica, for example, we were alright. But she didn't hold my interest for more than five minutes; honestly the girl had no depth. She became predictable. It became a routine. I had resolved to end it since there was no left. I made a choice to cut the strings that hold me back. I started with Jessica.
But it seemed I hit a bump in the road. I wasn't sure what to do next.
In fact I was so troubled I did not care I had just accepted accompanying Alice to one of her famous shopping sprees. I really couldn't care less. The plan was to drop her off, help her carry tons of bags and then drive back. I had managed to convince Emmett to go, we could escape Alice and hit the arcade. But the second I saw her, standing there so beautiful but seeming so uncomfortable (weren't girls supposed to love shopping?). I was drawn to her immediately; all I wanted to do was to take whatever it was that made her feel that way far from her.
She saw straight into my eyes, I couldn't look away it was almost like she WAS my center of gravity. I looked deep into her eyes; it wasn't that hard, hers were so profound. Part of me knew how impolite I was at the moment but other part of my brain believed that if I looked away she would disappear as if she was an illusion. She blushed and looked away. I smiled at the sight of her tiny face turning different shades of red. My hand itched to cup her face, to hold her close, to have her close enough to feel the heat coming from her blush. I wanted to see those eyes again. And this may sound creepy, I admit but I wanted to go inside and hold her face so that I could get lost in her eyes, forget to breathe, to talk, and to forget my own name.
I felt a little pull on my shirt and turned to find my pixie sister.
"Weren't you guys going to the arcade" she asked, her eyes wide with innocence, a little too wide…
"On second thought you may need a man's opinion", Emmett replied and wiggled his eyebrows.
"Emmett you do realize I'm the one picking your clothes right?" Alice shot back.
"But you can take my bags back to the car", she finished dismissive tone and handed about fifteen bags each.
By the time we returned Emmett was eager to see another girl that was in the store as well. I peaked through the window but my mysterious blushing girl was nowhere to be seen.
All Alice could talk about was going back to school; Emmett being the nonresponsive sibling was quickly an outcast in our conversation. Not that I actually cared about what Alice did, but don't get me wrong I love her and all but I still can't figure out how something so small can be so annoying, but she knew something big was going to happen if she (of all people) wanted to go to school.
That night was the first night I dreamt of my mysterious girl.
Maybe it was just me or Forks was seriously messing my ability to recognize the sun or something because I swear that for some reason that morning seemed to be the brightest I've ever seen. It was…different, for the first time in a long time I felt carefree, happy. Even Esme, my mother asked if I was sick because I laughed at some joke Alice made that morning.
We got into my Volvo and drove to school. As I pulled into the parking lot a convertible caught my eye. It was a BMW M3, Alice was obsessed with them for about two days until some designers collection came out.
Speaking of the devil, I had barely parked the car when Alice was already out and waving. I followed her gaze toward a tall, slender blond haired girl. She looked like the kind of girl who worked in the fashion scene; her long, wavy hair flowed perfectly over her shoulders. Emmett gasped as he too acknowledged her presence, I on the other side preferred brunettes.
I was not her sight that made me smile, it was what presence meant. The only thing Alice had told us about the girls was that they were somehow related. If this girl was attending school then maybe my mysterious beauty would too.
"Hey Rose! Nice to see you again!" Alice squealed as the girl approached with some guy behind. They were both very similar; he had sandy blond hair and piercing blue eyes. He was tall and could be mistaken by some actor.
"Good morning Alice! Let me introduce you to my brother Jasper. Jasper this is Alice the girl from the store I told you about" she said making the appropriate hand gestures.
"Hi nice to meet you, Welcome to Forks!" Alice stated eyeing him with interest.
"Oh where are my manners, this are my brothers Emmett and Edward" she said rather proud.
What the…?
Alice, proud to be our sister?! All she does is to constantly scream at us!
Emmett and I both shared the same confused face. I tried to hide mine but I don't think it worked since Alice elbowed me.
They started chatting among themselves and clicked immediately.
I knew where this was heading. Yep these guys will end up together; there was some undeniable chemistry among them.
Soon enough I felt like the fifth wheel.
For a moment I thought they had forgotten of my existence, not that I minded. I was busy scanning what little I could see of the high school building searching for a pair of captivating brown eyes.
"Edward, Jasper's in your first period class!" Alice squealed pulling me to my classroom.
"Bye Ed, see you around Jasper" Alice said over her shoulder as she walked away leaving me alone with the new guy.
Maybe I could get him to talk about his relatives, his angelic relatives.
Yep, that sounds like a good enough plan for me.
Jasper was actually a pretty ok guy, really easy to be with. Like he could actually calm you with one word. During that class hour we talked about many things. He talked about his family, Rose's obsession with cars, how they came to live with his uncle. It was easy to tell he liked my sister and I wanted to get him talking about someone I recently learned was his cousin…
So I thought about a casual approached, one that didn't look that stalker-ish.
I started by warning him about Alice's compulsive shopping disorder and how I had seen Rose the other day, and trying to sound really casual (ok maybe I overdid it…my bad) I asked about the other girl.
"Was she your cousin?" I asked trying to hide my curiosity.
Jasper looked puzzled.
"Yes, but I thought you might have known her. She has always lived in forks"
Now it was my turn to look puzzled.
"You didn't recognized her?" he said, humor embedded in every word.
I shook my head and a smirk appeared in his face.
"I suppose Rose has done her work well. But honestly she didn't change that much,"
He studied my confused expression and continued.
"I must explain then. Ever since I can recall when Rose and Bella get together, there is always a mission. Bella is forced to change her wardrobe and stuff. Girl stuff" he finished with a bored expression.
He's probably witnessed this a thousand times. But the image of my mysterious girl did not go with the one of the only Bella in town.
Not to be mean or anything, it's just that you normally do not associate the name Bella Swan with the concept of my mysterious girl.
"Bella Swan?!?!" I asked a little too loud.
Or maybe it was that there was so much silence but whatever the reason every student turned to look at me and so did Mr. Varner my trig teacher.
"Is there a problem Mr. Cullen?" He asked narrowing his eyes.
"No sir" I muttered.
And the bell rang, thank God!
As I walked Jasper to his next class we spotted Bella. Her hair laid gently on her shoulders, perfectly straight this time. She wore a blue v-neck blouse (ugh I'm spending too much time with Alice!), it looked breath taking on her, accentuating her naturally milky complexion. Her cheeks were faintly flushed in a soft pink and her eyes were glued to the ground.
Jasper was honest she didn't change that much, but those little changes were the ones that made me completely vulnerable. Yes she was still the same timid Bella but yet there was something I had not noticed on her before. She was naturally beautiful, unlike many girls. She was undoubtedly unique.
She looked very concentrated on the ground below her feet, Yes the same clumsy Bella.
And just as I thought this she fell down. Again I had the same strange urge to protect her even from herself. I mentally cursed myself for not being fast enough. By the time Jasper and I arrived at the scene, Bella had already landed.
I froze for a moment as I registered the fact that she looked so small and vulnerable lying in the ground like that. This new feeling increased, I felt guilty for not doing anything to prevent it. I had to get it right next time.
Wait…Next time?
But she was so stubborn. Kept insisting she was alright even when her newest accessory was a bloodied jean that hugged her legs perfectly and made her look so elegant and made her…ok focus Edward!
I managed to convince her to let me take a look, tried to sooth her but she was so nervous.
Was it for the blood or me? I think I'll like that…
I smiled at the thought and reached for her wound.
I gently wiped the blood and felt some sort of electricity when our skin touched. It wasn't painful it was rather…pleasant.
Her skin felt so soft, like feathers. She smelled like strawberries, it suited her so sweet and tender.
I wondered if her cheek was soft too.
I shook my head to try to block out the images forming in my head. It wasn't healthy for me to think about her like that. She looked so innocent, we were opposites.
I concentrated on her wound, like I had previously explained Jasper I had indeed learned some things from Carlisle.
I glanced over to Jasper and noticed he held her hand rubbing soothing circles on the back of her hand.
My body filled with another emotion. Was it jealousy?
No! He is just her cousin! I had to keep that in mind.
I decided to look at her instead and found myself lost in her eyes once again. What did this girl had that made me utterly wordless.
How was it that I didn't realize how beautiful she was? I must've been blind. She quickly looked away, blushing.
How dare she hide herself from me? Did she not realize that the sight of her eyes completed my wrecked world?
I had to make her look at me again. I stood up and Jasper let her hand go at the same time I let a breath out that I didn't know I was holding. I told them I was finished. She got up and I caught a glimpse of the panic in her eyes as she saw the tissues I used to wipe her blood.
She started falling but this time I would do my job properly.
I reacted quickly enough to catch her in my arms. She was so tiny and yet she fitted perfectly in my arms, as if they were pieces of a puzzle.
The electricity ran through my body again. She felt so warm. I wanted to hold her tight, to feel her breath on my face.
The thought made me look at her lips. They were slightly parted, with a soft pink color (at least her color was coming back). I subtly bent my head and felt her breath on my face, my mouth watered, I had an urge to close the gap between us and gently kiss her.
I walked into the nurse's room with a worried Jasper trailing behind. As carefully as possible I placed her on one of the beds. The moment she was out of my arms I felt incomplete, like she took something of me and I wanted her to keep it so she would never leave my side.
I did not like the idea of leaving her there so vulnerable and unsafe.
The period before lunch was by far the most excruciating of them all. I hadn't seen her yet. Rose said Jasper had a class with her previously and said she was fine.
Rose and Alice sat beside me, giggling at nothing and passing notes.
My leg jumped up and down while my eyes were glued to the clock. I needed to see by myself if she still breathed, not seeing her made me anxious. Time passed slowly igniting my rage.
How could I have such a bad luck? Why didn't I have any periods with her?
I watched as Alice sent Rose another note, they both looked at me and grin mischievously. I'm not sure I want to know what they are planning.
Alice quickly scribbled something and passed it to me.
Don't worry alright! I had a class with her and she's perfect…a little distracted…quite an impression you caused the poor girl!
I looked at her and rolled my eyes. She wrote another one and passed it again.
You like her right? You want to know if she is alive. See it with your own eyes… I think its cute… and so does Rose!...so consider yourself approved! You mind if I help, You can be such an ass sometimes!
I read each word carefully over and over again until they were cut deep into my mind.
Could Alice be right? I do want to know if she's safe and maybe I do like her but it's too early to say anything else right? But to ask for Alice's help was pathetic to say the least. Although she sometimes has this sixth sense about stuff like this.
I swear it seemed she could see the future.
I glanced in their direction and nodded. They grinned at each other and started to jump up and down in their seats.
We arrived together at the cafeteria and Alice gave Rose and I some directions. Apparently all I had to do was sit.
Easy If I wasn't sweating like a pig.
I took my 'assign' seat and took out a deodorant and sprayed lightly. Emmett took a seat across of mine and eyed me suspiciously.
"Nervous Eddie?" He asked nodding towards the deodorant on my hand.
"No!" I answered a little too quickly.
"Rose is mine!" He said with such seriousness I never thought possible coming from Emmett.
He narrowed his eyes and I swear I heard him growl!
"Chill Em, He's got his eyes fixed on another female", Alice stated casually lying a hand on his shoulder.
"Aw…Has the oh-so-mighty-Ed finally caught his maiden?" Emmett said returning to his old self.
"Shut it!" I snapped and crossed my arms.
Jasper approached our table with a giant mountain of food on a tray, he placed the food on the table and studied my face. He smiled and simply answered "Alice orders"
Oh
He headed towards a seat at my side when Alice Screamed and pulled him.
"No! Leave that seat to Bella! You'll seat over there!" she finished pointing at a chair two seat away from mine.
Alice sat beside Jasper leaving two seats available, one beside Emmett and one beside me. Obviously Rose will seat with Emmett, so…
Oh
I searched for the familiar face, finding Bella on the lunch line with Rose behind shooting nervous glances at Alice.
Her big brown eyes scanned the room, and I noticed she had her hair pulled into a ponytail with a few flocks of her hair loose.
Alice stood up and waved to get their attention.
I could tell everyone in the entire cafeteria had shut up and was watching our little show.
Rose waived back and towed Bella over. Rose as predicted sat with Emmett, leaving Bella with only one choice left.
Her heart-shaped face went blank when Alice asked her to take a seat.
Evil pixie, she obviously looked uncomfortable.
Bella sat down quickly and concentrated on her food.
I spent almost the entire lunch hour conjuring any words to come out, but my body didn't respond. Every time I inhaled my senses were clouded by her intoxicating smell.
She had a thoughtful yet peaceful look; I couldn't do anything but memorize her features, imagining how her cheeks would feel like against my hand.
"Hey Bella what's your next period?" Alice asked interrupting my daydreaming-about-Bella time.
"Biology I think" she stuttered.
Alice kicked me from under the table, and I realized MY next class was biology!
"We should be lab partners" I blurted, "You know MY next class is Biology too!"
I want to die; I'm probably the most pathetic guy ever! 'Lab partners' honestly!
She looked at me and the sight of her smile made me smile like an idiot.
"Sure", she answered looking away while blushing furiously.
The bell rang, Bella and I walked out of the cafeteria but excused herself to get something she had forgotten. I walked by myself into the classroom, grinning like the idiot I am.
I went over to one of the empty table in the middle and sat. I felt the seat beside me scrape the linoleum floor but when I glance to see Bella I found Jessica, my ex-girlfriend.
She wore a specially revealing shirt and a very short skirt. She crossed her legs revealing a little more skin and placed one of her hands on my thigh.
"I've missed you baby" she said trying to sound sexy.
"Well I didn't" I answered and threw away her hand, I should incinerate this jeans later.
"And keep your hands to yourself" I finished.
She looked shocked for a minute.
"I get it your playing hard to get", she croaked, a devilish smile playing in her lips.
You had to give to her, the girl was persistent.
I scanned the room looking for Bella and found her making her way towards one of the last tables in the back.
I quickly gathered my things and went after her, I saw the Newton kid eyeing Bella and making my same move.
I was quicker and manage to block his path whispering
"Don't even think about it", He looked shock but narrowed his eyes.
I saw her stumble and quicken my pace in time to catch her, I used one arm to steady her and placed my things on the table. Her back was turned to me so I bent and whispered softly into her ear.
"Do you have some type of fondness towards the ground that I should know about?"
She blushed and quickly made her way to her seat leaving my arms with that hollow feeling once again.
"I thought you'll be with Jessica" she stated still not looking at me.
"I rather spend time with someone that has more brain than a fly if you don't mind" I joked.
And for the first time, I made her laugh.
Hope you like it!
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