"Vala I know what all that's happened, I could never make up to you what I caused. But I………I want to start all over again. I want to get to know you all over again. Now from this very beginning. I want to do whatever it takes to win you back, no, I mean for you to trust me. I mean anything. I do love you, whether you believe it or not, it's up to you. I can wait; I can wait for however long you want. No strings attached, for whatever it takes from me. I want us to start from the beginning."
Vala's face held no emotions for him to read. In the back of Daniels mind, he would do anything to get Vala back. Vala looked Daniel in the eyes and physically held her breath for a few seconds and breathed out a sigh before answering Daniel.
"I want a divorce."
Daniel sat up abruptly and starred at Vala. Her request had taken him off guard. He felt slightly light headed as if someone had taken his heart out and sucked the life from him. He shook his head in denial at what he heard. His mouth felt dry and his breathing became labored. He scooted back near the tub as he felt nauseas at not hearing the words, but felt like they were slamming into him like a sledge hammer.
"Di…….di………divorce?" The words stuck in his mouth. He thought he was going to cry, but held it in. He swallowed, trying to coat his throat with moisture. He tried several times to clear his throat, to come to some conclusion of what he just heard.
Vala looked at Daniel without an ounce of emotion. "Yes Daniel. You said anything. Your exact words. You said you would do anything to win me back or for me to trust you. Are you lying?"
Shaking his head. "No, no, I……..I'm not lying. I would never lie to you Vala. But……….but I had………
"But what Daniel? Too big a sacrifice on your part. I told you I never asked to be married. You did this on your own. I was half out of it down on the planet and now I have a chance to think freely of what's happened in those few days. Why can't I have a choice this time, or is that too hard for you to understand?"
Vala controlled her anger and only felt a sense of calm come over her. It's the first time she felt in a position of strength for a long time.
"I had a surprise for you. I…………I…………I had it arranged that ………………..excuse me." Daniel stood up and walked from the bathroom. He walked briskly to the room and out the door. He walked outside his house and sat on the stoop. Sam, Teal'c, Mitchell and Carolyn were confused. They knew something had happened between the two; something dramatic. Carolyn motioned Sam to go to Vala's room and she asked Mitchell to make some fresh coffee.
"Teal'c I need you to sit with Daniel and just see what happens. I'm going to see Vala." Said Carolyn.
Daniel sat at the end of his stoop, starring at nothing. He had to get out of Vala's room. He couldn't breathe and he was becoming dizzy. His world had turned into an emotional bout with himself and now Vala. His head was reeling from the emotional blow dealt, without malice to his ego. He thought that Vala would ask for something simple for him to trust him with, but not this. This was too much; he thought about all the red tape he had Jack and General Landry go thru to give Vala a citizenship. He thought about what they will say, when he tells them, Vala wants a divorce. Teal'c had seen Daniel double over to wrench, and had motioned Mitchell for a wet towel from the kitchen. Daniel never saw Teal'c come up behind him and set beside him as he wrenched over the side into his bushes. When Daniel finally stopped; Teal'c handed him the towel to clean his mouth and sat and said nothing. Daniel sat up and continued to stare into the warm breeze as the sun slowly shown over the shadow of the trees. It glassined across his drive, emanating its rays onto his green grass. He watched as the breeze shook the trees, and then he sank his head into his hands. Teal'c without hesitation put his hands on Daniel's shoulders and watched the sun shine over the trees, as the breeze slightly shook them. Teal'c just sat in silence, waiting for his friend Daniel to recover from whatever pain he was feeling. He waited as long as it would take.
Sam had walked in and found Vala's bed empty. She looked around briefly and headed towards the bathroom. Vala was sitting on the floor, starring at the walls. Not really looking, but just struck dumb by Daniel walking out on her without a word. Sam knelt down beside Vala and put her hand gently on her shoulder, so she wouldn't startle her.
"Vala? Are……….are you alright?"
Vala shook her head slightly to the left and right. "He left Sam." Vala's tears threatened to fall. "I asked him for a divorce and he just got up and left."
Sam hung her head down and sat down beside Vala. She pulled Vala into a hug. "Oh, Vala, I'm so sorry."
Vala continued to stare out at the walls, tears streaming down her face. "I…….I finally told him Sam. I told him what made me angry and why. His face Sam; I remember his face when I was being tortured. He never said a word. Of all the things I could have forgiven Daniel, it's his face of disgust that hurt me the most and then he tells me, he did it to put on a face of defiance. He never once thought about what that meant in my eyes. I felt so ashamed Sam, I told him I felt like nothing to him."
"You're something to him Vala. I know he loves you and I know that we were even mad at him for awhile at not speaking to you. But Vala I don't know if you know this; but each time we escaped, he was the one to hold you, talk to you, other than Teal'c. Daniel sat down and held you every moment he could get. He kept you warm, when you hardly had any clothing and when he saw you being tortured again, by Ba'al, he's the one that asked, no, begged Ba'al to take him and leave you alone. I've never seen him so terrified in his life Vala. Every single moment he couldn't be with you, he broke down and cried. "
"Really Sam?" Vala asked as if a child, looking for approval.
"Yes, hon; he never left your side after coming from the planet and even when Adria took you away, he lost it Vala. He couldn't bear to see any more harm come to you. He cried for you Vala. I've never seen Daniel so open and vulnerable."
Vala let out a sob or relief. This was the first time that she even heard about Daniel holding her, or terrified for her. Carolyn walked in to the bathroom. She was listening behind the door, now wanting to interrupt Sam's revelation to Vala. She knelt down next to Vala also.
"Vala, I don't want to influence you about your decision on what to do about your relationship with Daniel. You know what's best for you. We can't make those decisions for you about what you want and how you handle what's happened to you. But I do know this; you have some very special friends behind you and they are there to help you when you need them or when they need you. But whatever you decide, begin when it's your time to do so."
Vala shook her up and down without saying a word. Sam looked at her to reassure Vala that she was behind her also.
"Sam, I think I want to take a shower. I have some things to think over."
"Ok, kiddo. I'll be right outside. We're all still here if you need us." Said Sam.
"I think I'll be in the kitchen with Col Mitchell. His coffee is too strong for me, and I want to make a fresh pot."
All three women smiled at that. Carolyn and Sam both left, hoping that Vala was feeling a little better, and that she had the strength to join them. Vala leaned into the shower, and turned it on, as hot as she could stand it. She let the tension drain from her body with each trickle of water, washing over her body. She decided to let go of her emotions and let it dissolve down the drain.
Carolyn and Sam joined Cam in the kitchen. True to her word Caroline made a fresh cup of coffee as Sam sat down at the table.
"So, what's going on with our two love birds? Daniel has not moved from his stoop since coming out of Vala's room. Teal'c is with him now."
Sam interjected, letting out a sigh. "Vala asked for a divorce from Daniel."
"Oh." Is all Mitchell could reply.
"There's more to it Cam, but, right now, it's up to them both, whether they want to continue their relationship as a married couple. But, I do believe there has been some progress on Vala's part. She seems to be more comfortable around the rest of you, and she's taking a shower. That's a sign that she's coming to terms about her worth. Otherwise she would stay in bed and give into her depression." Stated Carolyn.
"What about Jackson, Carolyn?" Cam asked.
"This is a big decision for both of them. He's going to have to come to terms about what Vala wants, not what he wants. You're his friends and I know you will be there for the both of them."
Before any of them could say another word. Vala opened the door and walked down the hall towards the kitchen. Caroline, Sam and Mitchell stood still as Vala walked over, poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down. All three looked at each other and then back at Vala.
Vala looked at Sam first, and then bent her head down, as her hands closed around the handle of the cup of steaming coffee.
"Sam, can you tell me where is Daniel?"
"Uh, he's outside on the stoop. Teal'c is with him. I……..I think Daniel needed some air."
Vala breathed in and closed her eyes and then opened them to look over Sam's shoulders to the outside. She stood up and started walking towards the entrance. Sam started to Sam something, but Caroline tugged on Sam's arm to stop her. Sam understood. Some things just needed to be worked out without them.
Teal'c heard the front door open and turned and looked over his shoulder and was surprised to see Vala. He smiled and bowed his head. Daniel had not heard or noticed anyone. His head was still in his hands, oblivious to anything. Teal'c with warrior stealth stood up and put a hand on Vala's shoulders and then went inside. Vala sat beside Daniel, without him even noticing the change. Vala watched Daniel with soft eyes for a few moments, sat the coffee down and gently grabbed his hands. She gently placed the coffee in his hands. Daniel was about to protest and looked up and was shocked to see it was Vala continuing to hand him a cup of coffee.
"Drink it's still warm."
Daniel stared at Vala for the longest time. His eyes were red from silent shed tears. He drank in her face, her eyes and hair. He did so love her hair. Vala believing he needed a little help, gently pushed the cup to his lips and he sipped his coffee, while Vala held onto the cup, not letting go. When he finally stopped drinking, he was afraid to let go of the cup, lest Vala would to. They both sat there, on the stoop, saying nothing, just holding the warm cup of coffee together.
After an hour or so, time seemed to stand still and Vala finally let go of the cup of coffee and turned to look beyond the trees, knowing that Daniel was starring.
"Sam told me that everytime we escaped, you held me to keep me warm."
"Yes." It came out a whisper from Daniel.
"She told me that………that everytime I was taken away, that it terrified you."
"Yes." A little stronger, but now quite above his whisper.
"She told me that you offered your life, to save me from Ba'al."
"Yes."
Vala's eyes were watering, but she held her tears. She said nothing, waiting, as the warm breeze shuffled the leaves in the trees.
With a lump in her throat. "I……….I didn't know that. You……….you never told me that."
Daniel stared at Vala, not really knowing what to say. "I would do it all over again, if it meant saving you from any harm."
Vala held her head down, feeling in the pit of her stomach the courage to speak to him.
"I……….I want us to be friends Daniel. I want you to know who I really am, not………not what you think I should be. I want you to talk to me, not at me. I can be infuriating sometimes, but you can still communicate to me, what you want. I……..I can't read minds you know."
"Yes Vala."
"I want you to love me for me Daniel, not because you believe it's an obligation. I'm not a contract, I'm a person; a good person."
"Yes Vala." Daniel was slightly starting to smile.
Vala slightly titled her head a little looking out towards the trees.
"I like the trees. They sway nicely."
"Yes Vala."
Getting up, Vala grabbed Daniel's cup of coffee.
"I'm getting another cup of coffee, wait here." As Vala opened the door to enter the house. She stood for a moment in the doorway, without turning around.
"I love you too Daniel." She walked in the house without saying another word and closed the door.
TBC