In Another's Shoes: Chapter 5
by Nubial Sheep
Summary: A short trip outside of the investigation headquarters has unforeseen consequences for Light, L, and Misa. When the three are forced to (quite literally) spend time in each other's shoes, will they adapt, will they grow, and most importantly; will things ever be the same?
Disclaimer: Death Note is the copyrighted property of Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata, not me.
Hello, my wonderful readers: I have updated again! Today I bear not only a new chapter, but good tidings as well! This November I will be participating in National Novel Writing Month (abbreviated NaNoWriMo), during which you write a 50,000 word novel over the course of November. My participation is rather loose, though. I'm just using it as incentive to get back into a daily writing groove. I'm going to be working on new material for this story as well as several others I have planned, so progress will be made!
Another Announcement: I'm in the market for a Beta! I already edit and spellcheck my work, but it would be great to have someone to check for more general continuity or to give me plot ideas; nothing too big. If anybody is interested, give me a PM and we'll work something out.
I give my sincere thanks to htotheizzo's generous plug for this story from her own fic, "A Vicious Circle". It's a lovely tale involving L, kidnap, and lots of beautiful, gruesome torture. I recommend it to anybody who's reading this that isn't already a fan of hers. To show her my gratitude, I have dedicated the title of this chapter to her story. You'll understand why it fits once you read the chapter. (~_^) I love you all!
Chapter 5:
A Vicious "Cycle"
As Light drifted up out of unconsciousness, his first thought was 'Please let it be a dream, please let it be a dream, please let it be a dream…' His hands slowly reached up towards his chest, hope swelling up in his mind while dread dragged at its edges. As he lowered his hand towards the soft plaid fabric of his pajama top, his fingers felt, instead of firm pectoral muscles, the soft fleshy volume of breasts.
'No no no nononononoNO!!! Damn it!"
Light's eyes flew open to see the familiar interior of the bedroom he shared with L through a curtain of haphazard golden hair, mussed by sleep, and a wreath of too-long lashes.
"What an odd way to wake yourself up, Raito-chan. Are breasts really that sensitive?"
Light shot an icy glare over at L, but did not stoop so low as to rise to his bait. The detective was sitting on the opposite corner of the bed, mantaining his balance while crouching oddly and cradling a laptop with his knees. Light felt his stomach twist as he observed his own body, taking in the uncharacteristic qualities that L had brought to it. Brown hair unconditioned and uncombed had lost its smooth, impeccable lustre and instead poked out in all directions like a bird's nest. Back too hunched, clothing too wrinkled, even the set of the muscles in his face was wrong.
Light looked away got out of bed and moved to the wardrobe, opening it to find a variety of new clothes. The outfits were simple: shirts, sweaters, pants, jackets and essentials in Misa's sizes. They were just the right kind of unisex; masculine enough in the cut and color palette to allow Light his dignity, yet form fitting enough to keep from being "butch."
Light reached in and pulled out a simple pair of jeans and a sweater warm enough to ward off the chill of the morning. Reaching into the drawer where he normally kept his undergarments, he found that there were also some new additions there as well. Light's felt the heat rising in his cheeks at the sight of the bras. Though they were rather simple in shape and style, devoid of any frills, lace or bows, Light couldn't help but feel bile rise in his throat as he snatched one at random off the top. After he had gathered everything, he pulled L off his perch and headed for the bathroom to change (Misa had requested that Light change in private keep "that voyeur" from seeing her naked). once he was in, chain slipping under the door, Light tore out of his nightclothes and into his day wear with unmatched efficiancy, never once taking his eyes off the bumpy texture of the ceiling or turning to face the mirror. Misa was a pretty girl for sure, but he really wasn't ready to see her naked yet, if ever. Ew.
The remainder of the morning before the investigation team arrived would have been almost normal if they could ignore the fact that they were not themselves. Misa came up to eat breakfast with them, and the three ate, for the most part, in peaceful silence. In the silence, however, Light would sometimes slide irritated glances at L as he dropped sugar cube after sugar cube into his tea, while Misa would keep looking at light and cocking her head when she thought he wasn't looking, as if to get a loot at the back of his, that is to say her own head. The meal finished without incident, and they departed to the investigation headquarters while Watari cleared up their plates.
Everyone worked even more diligently than normal that afternoon, avoiding any conversation more than short questions and clipped requests to pass a document or a dropped pen. Nobody made eye contact with anyone else, instead gluing their eyes to their papers in a concentration that was far too strong to be real. All of them were completely avoiding any discussion of the events from the day before. Tension hung in the air between them all like a fishing line strung taut, but nobody was willing to break the silence and confront what was hooked at the end of it. At one time Matsuda tried to lighten the atmosphere with a quick joke aimed at Misa, but faltered when he saw the icy stare directed at him from the blond teenage idol, and realized that he was speaking to the wrong person. Face red with embarrassment, he buried his head in a report, ruffling the papers around loudly and pretending to read until he realized that it was upside down.
Light, too, was not working as he should, though he was much better at hiding his lack of progress than the others. However, he was slacking off not out of awkwardness or social discomfort, but because for the past half hour had been suffering from terrible, gut-twisting stomach cramps. He had never felt such a constant, pulsing ache before, as if his pelvic bone had been turned into a rubber band and then stretched and twisted in painful knots. Whenever he shifted in his seat the pain increased exponentially, but he was too stubborn to admit his condition to anyone. He sat still in his chair and just rode the out pain, desperately hoping that it would end. Just another moment, he though, and it'll wear off. It'll go away. Just wait another minute...
However, after yet another hour of waiting, the cramps had only grown in their strength. He could barely stand them anymore, and had begun to unconsciously hunch over in his seat, his heart rate rising and his skin growing sweaty with exertion. He wasn't even making an attempt at feigning diligence, having lost almost all conscious thought to the red haze of agony that clouded his vision and blurred his senses. His gut was clenching and unclenching, his bones were pulsing with fire, so much so that he couldn't keep an even face any longer.
"Is Ratio-chan not feeling well?"
Damn, L had noticed. Light knew that at this point it was useless to try to deny his condition; it was evident he was suffering from something. Maybe he could brush it off as something minor...
"It's nothing, Ryuuzaki."
"It doesn't look like nothing, Raito-chan. It looks like you are in pain."
Light kept his tone easy and light, though it was a strain to keep the pain from leaking in through the cracks. He rolled his eyes lightly, as if mocking Ryuuzaki for his paranoia.
"It's just a small stomach ache, Ryuuzaki. I think may coffee may have disagreed with me this morning. Don't make a big deal out of it, I can still work."
It was just after Light finished had the last sentence that an even greater pulse of hot red pain burst like a popped bubble in his stomach, hitting him so unexpectedly that Light gasped and clutched his stomach with its force. Ryuuzaki narrowed his eyes.
"It does not look like a minor stomach ache, Raito. It looks like some sort of cramp, and if it is painful enough to make even you react then it must have been going on for some time. I think you need to take a break."
Light gritted his teeth, though out of frustration or agony he couldn't say. L just smirked smugly, an expression that fit so perfectly, so naturally on Light's borrowed face that Light himself was momentarily distracted from his aching pelvis by the fleeting impression that he was looking into a mirror. L continued to speak, this time his mellow tones covering a mocking lilt.
"…It's not like Raito-chan has been working, anyways."
By now the whole team had looked up from their papers, tentatively, to watch the exchange. They all needed some sort of distraction, and fights between L and Light were always quite spectacular, and even Soichiro enjoyed watching them, his eyes holding a small glint of pride that his son could hold his own against L, a master of multiple martial arts, skilled in self defense and copeiera. He would of course, give his son a good scolding and a long lecture about non-violence afterwards, but the pride was always there.
Before the conversation could continue however, Misa let out a gasp and stood up from her spot on the floor, black-rimmed eyes wide, L's face contorted with her tearful apology.
"Oh no, Misa-Misa is so sorry, Raito! Misa should have remembered that it was going to start today! Misa is so sorry for not telling you!! She should have known that it was today because she had just gotten off the pill and..." After that, Misa's speech began to crumble into unintelligible babbling as her ears went red and her eyes began to tear up.
Now everyone was staring at her, some stares perplexed, and many disturbed. It was L who next spoke, slowly and clearly, as if confirming a suspicion.
"Misa-Chan, do you mean to say that Raito-Chan is going through his...?" Though L trailed his sentence off, Misa seemed to understand what he was referring to, and nodded, sniffling unhappily and sending sorrowful looks at Light.
"I'm so sorry that you have to go through it so soon, Raito! I should have told you that I get really bad cramps, and you could've taken some aspirin, and I'm sorry and--"
"Misa, calm down. What are you talking about?" Light tried to make his voice low and soothing, though Misa's girlish tones weren't quite so suited to his inherently masculine charm. Misa made a move to answer him, but L cut her off.
"Misa-chan, Raito-chan, I believe we should continue this discussion outside of the investigation room. We do not want to disrupt everyone's concentration more than we already have. Even if Raito-chan may not be feeling well, that doesn't mean that all of our progress must halt." Saying this he shot a glance filled with thinly veiled chastisement all around the room, immediately causing all of the older men returned to their work, though they were internally disappointed that they wouldn't get to witness a fight.
Misa bowed her head and began to move towards the door, silent but ears flaming red with a stew of embarrassment and shame. Light made a move to nod, but it came out as a grimace accompanied by a groan of pain as another wave of cramps overtook him. The three exited the room, and made their down a hallway on their right until they reach a bathroom. The only sound as they walked was the muffled thuds of their footsteps on the carpet and the clink of the chain as it moved, glinting as it swung and caught the light. Light now found it easier to distract himself from the pain erupting just under his stomach by concentrating on his breathing and the beat of their footsteps. When they arrived at the lavatory, L left Misa and Light by the sink while he rummaged around in a cabinet near the toilet. For a moment nobody spoke, but finally Light broke the silence.
"Ryuuzaki, Misa, what is going on? It's just a stomach cramp. We didn't all need to come down here just to fetch me some pain reliever."
L responded in his usual monotone without ever ceasing his search, periodically taking out bottles and jars and tubes of toothpaste, only to replace them moments later.
"Those are not ordinary cramps, Raito-chan, they are menstrual cramps. Misa is scheduled to start her period soon, and therefore you are going to undergo it, since you are in her body. I thought it would be helpful to have her here to instruct you, since she has the most experience of the three of in this event, and she can give you advice about how to weather the symptoms. I thought we should come here for privacy; since even I, with my limited social skills, can tell that it is not the most proper subject to speak about in a work environment."
Light stared at him blankly for a long moment. Truthfully, he knew very little about the workings of the female body. He had heard, as all boys did, about how girls became emotionally turbulent and unnaturally aggressive at a certain time each month, and he had basic knowledge of both male and female anatomy from a scant few mandatory sex education classes, but beyond that his highly intelligent mind drew a complete blank. He didn't have any idea what happened during a girl's 'time of the month', and had never thought to investigate the subject. Despite his utter lack of knowledge, Light was not particularly willing to fully disclose the scope his ignorance to anyone, but especially not to L. So instead of requesting a more in-depth description of exactly what was going on, he didn't speak at all..
Then, of course L just had to ask the question that would expose him. It would have appeared to be a completely normal, innocent question if Light hadn't known L enough to know what emotion really lay behind it.
"Raito-kun, do you know what goes on during the female menstrual cycle?"
Light gritted his teeth together in annoyance, but did not answer. L finally straightened up, placing a bottle of aspirin, a small cardboard box covered with brightly colored labels and an equally colorful plastic box on the cream-colored surface of the countertop. He unscrewed the cap of the aspirin bottle, tipped two slender white pills into his hand, ran a glass of water from the tap and handed both to Light, who gulped down the water and the pills so fast that anyone with less self-control might have choked. L waited until Light was finished before he spoke again, and though his expression was quite neutral, his hidden smirk was evident in his voice.
"I will take Raito-kun's silence to be an affirmative. I would have thought, having a younger sister in the house, that Raito-kun would have been at least somewhat educated about the subject; it is really too bad that he is so uninformed."
L stacked up the smaller box and the bottle of aspirin on top of the larger container, handed them to Misa, and turned out of the room, leading the others further down the hallway and into a moderately large sitting room, furnished simply but comfortably, and in a style reminiscent of a hotel. Watari was already there, and seemed to have set up a laptop and a digital projector in the far corner of the room, with the image residing on a blank screen that had been pulled down from the ceiling. L nodded to Watari and thanked him, plopped down gargoyle-like on the couch and motioned for Light and Misa to take the seats next to him. As soon as everyone was sitting, the lights went off and Watari pulled up the first image in the slideshow. The first picture was an illustration of a woman's pelvis that showed the placement of the reproductive organs within it, which were note altogether dissimilar shape from the head, ears and trunk of an elephant. L began to narrate, indicating specific parts of the image on the wall with the aid of a small laser pointer.
"The menstrual cycle is a set of recurring, hormonally produced physiological changes that occur in females who have reached puberty. The length of a cycle varies between each female, but the average length of time between each period of menstruation is 28 days. During menstruation, the uterine lining, or endometrium, is shed.
In order, here, here, and here" L directed the small red dot produced by the laser pointer at different parts of the image, "are the ovaries, fallopian tubes, and the uterus. The ovaries," the red dot now circled around to indicate each in turn, "which we shall address first, are made to produce thousands of ova, commonly referred to as eggs, upon reaching puberty. This process is driven by hormones, called estrogen and progesterone, that are produced in the ovaries upon the arrival of puberty. These two hormones have many effects upon the female body, one of which is the production of ova.
Now, every month or so, the ovaries release an egg, in the process called ovulation. The egg comes down the fallopian tubes here, until it reaches the uterus. The uterus, to prepare, is coated along it edges with a thick, cushioned lining of blood and tissue, called the endometrium. If the ova has been fertilized, it will become stuck in the endometrium, and begin to grow. If, as often is the case, the egg has not been fertilized, the endometrium is shed in order to flush the useless egg out, going through the vagina in order to exit the body. It is this process which is called menstruation, and which usually takes a period of three to five days to complete. The amount of blood lost through this period is normally between ten to eighty milliliters, the average being thirty-five milliliters.
Common symptoms of menstruation include abdominal or uterine pain of varying degrees (sometimes referred to as dysmenorrhea), back pain, menorrhagia (heavy blood loss), physical bloating, puffiness, degrees of emotional fluctuation sometimes including an increase in irritation commonly associated with the term premenstrual syndrome (abbreviated PMS), and migraine headaches."
Finally, the presentation was finished. The lights came back on, the screen retracted, and Watari folded the laptop and put it away. Misa was a bit pink in the face, but had calmed down. Light's complexion was shifting through various shades or bright red, green and ghostly white, his eyes staring off into the distance. When he had finally regained enough composure, he began to ask questions.
"You mean girls have to go through this every month? I have to go through this every month? It sounds so uncomfortable and… messy. How do they deal with it? And how, exactly, do you know all of this, and why in god's name do you have a slideshow of it?"
Despite Light's rising crescendo of outraged indignation beside him, L spoke just as monotonously
"As a detective, I need to be prepared for any possibility. It can be vital, in many situations, to have knowledge of the innate physiology of both male and female bodies. As for the show, Watari kindly set it up for me while we were getting our supplies. Now, as to your other questions…"
L motioned for Misa to pass him the parcels that they had previously acquired from the bathroom, and once he had them in his hands he took the first, and pulled the top open. Inside the box was a large amount of small, uniform objects that Light did not recognize which were all wrapped in identical pink plastic wrappers. L withdrew one deftly with his slender hand, holding it delicately with the bare tips of his thumb and forefinger, while his other hand began removing the object from its plastic wrapper. When he was finished With this done, L held out the object to Light, waiting until the blond hesitantly took it from him, face revealing equal parts morbid fascination and dread, and began to examine it.
The object was a long, thin cotton cushion of an approximately rectangular shape. As light examined the back, he saw a strip of thin paper-like plastic that covered two strips of some thin adhesive material. As Light analyzed the object, L spoke.
"This, Raito-chan, is a sanitary napkin, oftentimes referred to as a pad. It is made to be positioned along the inside of the underwear in order to absorb the excess menstrual flow. The adhesive on the back helps it stay in place. Throughout the course of the day, the sanitary napkin will become full, and will have to be replaced. Misa-chan, normally how many times a day do you have to replace them?"
Misa blushed bright red with surprise at being addressed so suddenly, but calmed down as she looked away for a moment, calculating, before she answered.
"F-four to six times a day, depending on things…"
"And how long does your period of menstruation normally last?"
"Eto… usually six to seven days."
"So we will make sure to have each bathroom stocked with a box of these for the next week. "
Light's ears were flaming bright red by now. "I can't wear this, Ryuuzaki; it's like a diaper!" he muttered harshly, flinging the offending napkin to the floor in front of him in disgust, crossing his arms over his chest, but uncrossing them as soon as he felt the way they squashed into his alien breasts.
"It's degrading enough having to wear women's… undergarments… but this is just -- urgh!!" Light was too enraged to even finish his sentence, instead ending with a growl of agitation.
"Raito-chan shouldn't throw things on the floor. Watari has a hard enough time cleaning everything up without you adding to his duties."
"Shut up! I don't want to do this!"
"You know, you do not have to use a pad if you do not want to, Raito-chan. There are other options available to you."
Light glared skeptically, at L, scowl still firmly set in place. L ignored him, instead leaning down to set the box of pads on the floor under him and picking up the smaller, yet unopened box. Pulling the top flaps of cardboard apart, L reached in and withdraw a small object wrapped in white paper. Inside the paper was a short, thin cylinder of cotton sheathed in thin white cardboard. L then turned to light, eyes wide and quite innocent.
"Now, shall I explain to Raito-chan the proper method of inserting a tampon?"
Misa blushed from beside them, fiddling with her gothic necklaces in an attempt to distract herself, while Light's whole face had gone a heated red. His voice, laced with fury, was dangerously low as he asked,
"What do you mean, 'insert?'"
*five minutes and one altogether too detailed explanation later*
"I know Raito-chan must be going through his post-menstrual syndrome, but I really must insist that you calm down."
L's voice sounded a little odd, but then again, he did currently have a tampon stuffed up his left nostril. He ducked to avoid a small, feminine and surprisingly accurate hand as it lunged forward to make quick work of his second nostril. As he ducked down his hand came up to grab his wrist, but Light had anticipated this and retracted his limb.
"Calm? You bastard! How can I be calm?!? I'm bleeding from my uterus! I shouldn't even have a uterus! Now get over here so I can show you just where you can 'insert' this thing!"
On the last word the blond crouched and lunged while simultaneously yanking on the chain of his handcuff, pulling L towards him by his wrist while aiming the small cotton implement at his face. L did not resist the pull, but instead sailed straight ahead, crashing into Light and causing them to both topple over in a heap onto the carpet in a tangle of chain and limbs.
Then, the two of them found themselves in quite an awkward position. L was lying flush on top of Light, who was flat on his back, both of their blood still pounding in their veigns from the exercise. L pushed himself up a bit and found himself staring down into Light's surprised eyes. Both of them let their gaze stretch out into one long moment as they their labored breaths began to slow, neither moving. They were so caught up in that moment that they didn't hear the hurried approach of footsteps until the door lurched open and the investigation team came bursting in.
"What's going on? We heard shouting. Is everything okay—"
Soichiro's sentence abruptly cut off he caught sight of the figure of his son looming over the flushed blond, and his jaw fell. The room went absolutely still, absolutely silent for a long moment, before Matsuda, blushing and stammering, voiced the question that everyone had been thinking.
"R-Raito? What are you d-doing… with… to…Misa-chan?"
Then the adolescent brunette turned his head and looked at them, and all of them remembered who he was for now, for there was no mistaking the perfectly unaffected, calculating mask of L and the unaffected, serene mask of Light Yagami. The entire crowd visibly relaxed, because they knew that there was no way that the great detective L would do anything of the sort.
And then Aizawa noticed the tampon sticking out of L's left nostril and began to chuckle heartily, unable to stop himself. The rest of the team glanced at him quizically at first, but after glancing back at L, they caught site of it too. Then the chuckles and snickers spread throughout the men, and soon gave way to outright laughter that bubbled and frothed with merriment, completely washing away the tense atmosphere of the room. Even after L and Light had untangled themselves and removed themselves from the floor, the laughter continued to spill through the air like warm sunlight, some of the team laughing so hard tears were leaking from their eyes. The mood was infectious; even L cracked a smile.
And for a few golden minutes, Light forgot about his previous raging stomach cramps, his uterus, and the menstrual nightmare that he would have to live through for the next week. A feeling that was not quite happy, but warm and light all the same seeped down into his lungs like a short of fresh air
It was gone all too soon.
Author's Note:
So how did you like it? Was it funny, realistic, depressing, informative, stupid: what? Constructive criticism is always welcome! If I have made a mistake, I'd rather be informed about it than left ignorant (it's like when you discover you've had food on your face for half the day and none of your friends cared to mention it to you).
I have to admit that I thoroughly enjoyed watching Light suffer in this chapter, and that I will continue to enjoy it in the future. From the moment I started planning this story, I knew I'd have a chapter somewhere devoted to Light's first period. I had a lot of fun researching menstruation, and it was good experience translating the information into fitting L's way of speaking. I can totally see him sitting there, calmly explaining all the intimate details of the menstrual cycle or the proper use of tampons as if he was describing a serial murder case.
Was the whole "fighting and then tripping over onto each other" thing too cliché? It wasn't meant to be romantic or sexual or anything like that, but I needed to get the fight over with, and I chose it because it would create some wonderful misunderstandings if seen by a 3rd party.
On another note, because of possible future chapters I'm considering bumping up the rating of this story to Mature. It occurred to me that Misa may try to… explore her new body a bit. What say you, O Wondrous Readers? There'll be no pairings in this fic, mind, but some individual "private time" scenes are not outside the realm of possibility.
Hey, I just realized that I posted this on Halloween! Happy Birthday, L!! Everybody, sing "Happy Birthday" for him! If you're reading this at some later point, then sing "happy Belated Birthday" to him.
And remember: your reviews are what truly inspire me; they lift my mood when I'm down, and motivate me to write when I feel laziness setting in. Many thanks to all my reviewers so far: you're all awesome!