Chapter 5

She took a step back away from Jax, her hands still held out at arm's length. She let go of his cut as she took in a deep breath. None of this was supposed to happen. She wasn't there to stir all of this shit back up. She was there to do her job and to leave it at that. But now… She dropped her head low, her eyes looking to her feet. She closed them for a split second before she saw him take a step towards her. She took a step backwards towards the door. Her eyes very slowly moved up to meet Jax's.

"I have to go," she whispered before turning around and walking out of the door. She could no longer stay in the club house. She knew what would happen next, and she couldn't let it happen. She stepped out into the bar, holding the tears back, she needed to be strong. She found her uncle and moved towards him.

"Do you still have the keys to my dad's house?" she asked Chibs. She knew the answer, and she knew that if she was staying in town that was the place she needed to be at.

"Aye, lass. Everything alright?" asked Chibs.

"Yeah," she let out a soft sigh, "I just thought it would be easier to stay there instead of here. Maybe fix it up a bit or something." She shrugged her shoulders, hoping that he would get the fact that she needed to be somewhere that Jax wasn't. Chibs looked to the other side of the room and seen Jax walking down the hallway with his hands shoved into his jeans pockets. Tessie didn't even bother to look in his direction.

Chibs reached into his pocket, pulling out his keys. He unhooked a couple of them and handed them over to Tessie. "Nobody's been in that house since ya left. Not even me," he said, giving her a faint smile. "It's probably one 'ell of a mess." Tessie shrugged, said her thanks, and asked Chibs to let Charlie know that she left.

Once she walked outside, she made her way towards her car. She needed distance. She wasn't there for herself, or for Jax. It was a job. A job that she shouldn't have taken, but she was the only one who could take it. She knew this whole thing would be a bad idea, but she didn't care at the time. And now, she knew that one way or the other, things were going to go the opposite direction than she had planned.

She had made it to her old house in one piece. Tessie was surprised she didn't cry the whole way there. She was stronger than this. This was no time to be a girl. She shook the thoughts from her head as she parked the car in the driveway. The place hadn't changed since she had left. Time had just taken its toll on the paint as well as a few other things. She wondered how bad the inside was.

She stepped out of her car, locking the doors, then making her way to the front of the house. She pulled out the keys that her uncle had given her, knowing which one was which, she unlocked the front door. Tessie pushed open the door and immediately the smell of dust and whatever else had hit her nostrils. The furniture was covered with plastic but the place needed air, badly. Before she moved to do anything else, she started opening all of the windows on the bottom floor. Some fresh air would be nice, and it would clear out most of this dust. Afterwards, she made her way up the stairs to the two main bedrooms and the main bathroom that connected the two. She opened all of those windows, saving her old room for last.

The moment she walked into her old room, she regretted taking this job and coming back to this place. The room was full of memories that she hadn't thought about in the decade since she had left. She walked over and opened the windows before turning around and looking at the place. At first glance, you wouldn't even realize this was a room for a teenage girl. There were posters of bands, muscle cars, motorcycles, and a few other things on the walls.

When she opened the closet that gave way this was a girl's room. All of her high school clothes were still there. Her short shorts, jeans, tank tops, hoodies, and anything else. Including the few shirts she had stolen from Jax or Opie once upon a time. She took in a deep breath as she stepped away from the closet, closing the door behind her.

She looked over to her dresser, smiling slightly as she seen the photos on her mirror. There was one of her and Jax when they were sixteen, the day after her father's funeral; and another of her, Jax, and Opie on the same day. She remembered that day. She spent most of it moping around the house until the boys came and took her away. They did everything they could to make her smile, and eventually get her to laugh. Gemma had taken those photos of them.

Tessie pulled the photo of the three of them off the mirror as she stepped back towards the bed behind her. She sat down on the edge of it, looking at the three of them in this photo. So much had changed since then. And too much of it was because of her. She was scared. She left because she was scared. She never told anyone that. Not even Charlie. She left without a word, knowing that it would hurt everyone she loved. But it was the only chance she had to live a different life outside of the Outlaw one.

She let out a deep breath that she hadn't even realized she was holding in before standing up and putting the photo back on the mirror. That was another lifetime ago. She had a job to do now. She needed to get her head straight and focus on that. She pulled the cell from her pocket and called Charlie up. She let her know they had a place to stay and that she was going to unload the car, before she headed back to TM to pick her up.

It took Tess only twenty minutes to put their suitcases where they needed to be. Part of her was trying to procrastinate going back to that place. But she knew that she had no other options than to pick up her friend. She sighed as she stepped out of the house, locking it back up and working her way to her car.

When she had made it back to the club house, she realized that other people had started to gather. It was a regular party. Other bikers, crow-eaters, and whoever else was brave enough to show up, had done so. Tessie had a feeling that this meant Charlie would want to stay and hang out, try to see if anything would happen. But Tessie knew better. She parked her car, stepping out and walking around, watching the people start to gather outside. She sat down on the rear bumper and folded her arms across her chest.

She would never admit it out loud, but a part of her really missed this place. It was home. It was her family. And she took the coward's way out leaving like she did. She dropped her head, looking to the ground as she pushed her body off the car. She walked towards the clubhouse door, moving through the crowd. It was already becoming a regular party and it was barely five in the evening.

She walked over to the bar, noticing there was nobody keeping an eye on the alcohol. If this night was going to go the way she had thought, she needed a drink. She reached behind the bar, grabbing the bottle of Jack just as someone grabbed her wrist. Tessie laughed, knowing that she would know that manicured hand from anywhere. She cocked her head over her shoulder, flashing Gemma her grin.

"What d'ya think you're doing?" Gemma laughed lightly.

"Well, I was going to pour me a drink since nobody else was here," smiled Tessie. Gemma grabbed two glasses and sat them down in front of them. She popped the lid off the bottle and poured the brown liquid into the two glasses.

"Welcome back, Tess," smiled Gemma as she raised her glass. Tessie clinked hers with the older woman's and let the warm liquid run down her throat. Liquid courage, as her father had always called it. The only reason she stuck with her select few drinks. She seen Charlie and Juice, Charlie giving Tess a slight wave, she returned it. Her eyes wandered around until she found Jax, he was sitting with some skinny blonde. Her legs took up most of her body, and those heels. Tessie shook her head, noticing that Jax had noticed her, and she downed the rest of the liquid in the glass. She was officially jealous. Shit.