Nightmares and Dreamscapes

By: MissJayne

The cold morning air surrounded Leroy Jethro Gibbs as he stepped out of his car. The sun was shining somewhere above him, but it had yet to warm Arlington National Cemetery.

As his hands tightened on the flowers he held, he wondered briefly why the weather was so nice. It was a year since Jenny's death – a year since the light had gone out on his life for the second time. Why did other people get second chances and not him?

He walked past a flag at half mast, his feet following a path they knew by heart. Although he would never let his team know, he tried to visit Jenny at least once a week. Sometimes he would simply stand and stare at her headstone, and others he would talk to her.

He knew his team still worried about him, about how badly her death had affected him. With good reason too; he had lost the second love of his life and he knew he would never meet someone quite like Jenny. She had accepted the darkness that resided deep inside his heart and left it alone. Everyone else tried to change him; she had merely smiled and gone along for the ride.

With the years that had passed, he had learnt why. She had her own demons hidden deep inside of her. She had not wanted to share them either, both content to ignore the darkness and embrace the light that existed when they were together.

The headstone stood in front of him, mocking him with its empty words. No words could sum up how much Jenny Shepard had meant to him, no words could sum up everything she had done in her life. He glared at them for a moment as though they were the reason she was not standing beside him, teasing him and getting in the way of his cases.

He blew the air out of his lungs in one long breath. The red roses in his hands suddenly seemed inadequate for her. Memories of happier times came crashing back over him. He allowed them to come, regretting that they hadn't been able to put aside their differences sooner and thus spent more time together.

"Jenny," he croaked after a few minutes. He cleared his throat, deciding to try again.

"Remember Marseilles?" He picked the first memory that came to mind. "That stakeout. August. Stuck in that attic with no air, photographing everyone who boarded that Lebanese trawler. That second night, that's the first time we…"

He trailed off, fairly sure that he shouldn't be recalling that memory while standing at someone's grave.

The roses in his hands reminded him what he had come for. He sighed, running a finger over one of the petals. Kneeling down, he placed the flowers on the grass…

Only for a hand to swiftly emerge from the ground and grab his hand…

NCISNCISNCIS

Leroy Jethro Gibbs sat bolt upright in bed.

Another nightmare. They seemed to be a regular occurrence for him. He hauled himself out of bed and headed for the shower, knowing from experience that he would need to wash the sweat and fear away from him before facing the rest of the day.

It wasn't long before he found himself in his car, driving in the opposite direction to the Navy Yard. Vance had decided that it was safer to give him the day off than to deal with his expected mood on the first anniversary of Jenny's death. Gibbs felt that it was the safest course of action; he wasn't entirely sure how to behave. There was only so long that he could snap at his team and make sure that Jenny was not mentioned by name.

He followed a route that he been etched in his memory for some time now, making sure that he took the necessary precautions. No one appeared to be following him so he pulled up outside the house.

It was an older house, on the outskirts of DC. He knew from experience that the neighbors were friendly and knew when not to pry. He stepped out of his car, a bunch of red roses in his hands.

He didn't bother to knock, going for the hidden spare key instead. He might have a key of his own but she needed to learn that she couldn't leave a key outside, inviting anyone and everyone into her safe haven.

The door swung open easily and he entered. He smirked as he saw her on the stairs.

"Hello Jethro," she greeted him, hiding her surprise well and making her way down the rest of the steps.

"Hello Jen," he answered, drawing her into a hug and holding her close.

She pulled away after a little while. "I take it you've missed me," she commented, smiling softly. "How are you? How's my agency?"

"Agency's fine," he noted, following her into the kitchen as she hunted for a vase for her flowers. "Vance wasn't sure what to do with me today, so here I am."

"I hate witness protection," she grumbled, placing the vase on the table and turning to inspect her roses. "Is there a reason these aren't at Arlington?"

He couldn't exactly tell her that he hadn't left the flowers on her grave because he was afraid of her really being dead and grabbing his hand. Judging by the smirk on her face, she had a good idea though.

"Leroy Jethro Gibbs, you are a strange man," she grinned.

He grinned back at her before placing a soft kiss to her lips. "I'm strange?"

She nodded. "Do you have any plans for today? I mean other than standing in my kitchen and talking."

He pretended to think, before pulling her off her feet and heading towards the stairs.

"Jethro!" she squealed. "Put me down."

He ignored her, taking the stairs two at a time and hoping against all hope that his team weren't stupid enough to call him for the next few hours.

THE END