Disclaimer: Total Drama is owned by Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network while the Nostalgia Critic is owned by Doug Walker of Channel Awesome and the AVGN is owned by James Rolfe of Cinemassacre.
Note: Someone else has favourited my story! It's a user known as MrRayNay. God, this just overwhelming! Also, I've also requested commissions from other artists on Deviantart to do my tweens in Total Drama style (by 8liana8), Kids Next Door style (by pinkandorangesunset) and Powerpuff Girls Z style (by BiPinkBunny). Check them out in my favourites section. Anyway, on with the show.
Once the dust has cleared from the landslide, all of the campers were getting their head together.
"Alright," Lauren exclaimed in an irritated tone, "was the landslide even anticipated!? I'll bet it was to make the cave darker and the challenge more desperate!"
"Well complaining about it is not going to solve anything here," Jenny said, "Remember, we have a half-hour time limit. Ooh a flashlight." She found a flashlight and lit the place.
"Oh thank goodness," Malcolm sighed in relief, "I was just about to go mental just now. Alright, let's see what we have for supplies." He searched the bags for food when he came across a whole roll of mentos and a bottle of cola. "Wait a minute. That's it?"
Confessional: Why so little!?
AVGN: Those goddamn kids need to learn not to &%^# around with me. So I swapped the sandwiches over with the same bull$#!% that got me! (He eats a sandwich)
Malcolm: There's one thing you should know about me. I'm scared of the dark. I wasn't scared that time due to the lights of the moon and the glowing keys but this is pitch black darkness!
As Nessie quickly got the other 2 flashlights for the rest of the Mad Marmosets, Victor held onto the cola and mentos roll.
"Okay guys," he said, "I'm going to give each of you one mentos pellet each and I'll keep the rest." He proceeds to give the mentos to the 8 other campers and downed the other 6 without swallowing them.
"Oooh," Mari groaned at the sight of that, "doesn't that hurt?"
"Yeah, I wouldn't recommend doing that one your first try," Victor warned, "but after you practice many many times, you start to get used to it. Now watch me, Anarchy V do something cool."
As Victor began to down the cola bottle, Nessie used her flashlight to find an elevator before shouting, "Hey Marmosets! Come over here! I found the way in!" The Marmosets found her and ran over to the elevator; Victor was walking a bit slowly clutching his belly.
"Ow, my stomach is hurting," Victor groaned.
"Turn around then," Nessie ordered as she noticed the Crocosaurs gaining on them. Victor turned around to barf on them to slow them down before running into the elevator and making it go down.
"Aw crap! They're getting away," Lauren shouted, "Alright, let's take the fireflies. We cannot let the Marmosets win again!"
"I hear you," Jim said angrily, "When I see that little twerp, he's going down!"
The Crocosaurs then had to shimmy down the elevator shaft to try to catch up to the Marmosets.
Confessional: Don't try this at home kids.
Victor: Woo, hoo hoo! That was awesome! I really missed that old persona of mine.
Mari: I've seen the cola/mentos experiment before. That looked dangerous! Luckily Vicky barfed all the fizz up.
Jim: I do not like getting barfed on, okay!?
Meanwhile in the forest, Chris and Jonny were rolling nuclear waste cans over to the RCMP.
"Here you go guys," said Chris, "That's another round of toxic waste right here. Okay, rest time."
"Uh uh, no way," Jonny refused, "I got more barrels than you did! Get some more or I'm telling the boss!"
"So what," Chris taunted, "He won't believe you."
"You do realise the island is under surveillance all over," Jonny noted.
Looking like he had been shot in the face, Chris gave in, "Okay fine! I'll get the rest; you can go do whatever! Just leave me alone!"
"Yes," Jonny cheered in victory as he went deeper into the forest to find a little bunny.
"Aw, a bunny," he cooed as he picked it up, "You are so cute!" He hugged it tightly like it were a puppy but then he felt something sticky take it away from him. "Hey what the hell," he asked confused as he looked up a strange floating figure who burped, "Hey! You ate the bunny!"
"G'day," said the figure that resembled a floating BLU sniper with his legs bent upwards and his hands up to his head, "I'm Weaselcake."
"Hi, I'm Jonny," Jonny greeted the figure, "I'm cool right now and I would like to know what you do on a daily basis."
"I do this to friends," Weaselcake said as he inflated, glowed violet and shouted, "Cake!" A chocolate cake immediately appeared in Jonny's hands.
"Oh wow," he said in awe, "thanks!" He began to eat the cake as Weaselcake stared on.
Confessional: This cake is no lie!
Jonny: (eating the cake) Wow! I befriended a freak! And he gave me cake! (His belly gurgles) Oh boy, I ate too much. (He covers his mouth)
Nostalgia Critic: That little boy is learning a lot about Total Drama. He's right; I am watching you Chris!
The Mad Marmosets were heading along the trail nicely as Malcolm analysed some gadgets and their instructions.
"It says her that arm bands start off green," Malcolm read, "at the 15 minute mark they turn orange; at 5 minutes left they turn red; if's there's skull and crossbones the lava's coming. Alright guys, put these on." He threw the gadgets at his teammates as they put them on their arms.
"All right, these armbands should tell us the time left," Jenny said as another Christian Brutal Sniper showed up in their way, making them scream.
"Wave goodbye to yer heads, wankas," Christian Brutal Sniper shouted as he slashed at them as a bat flew in his face. He was running all over the place until he fell down the cliff, leaving behind his fedora.
"Hey, look at this," Malcolm said as he picked up the hat, "Maybe Manitoba Smith will help us here."
"I don't know," Victor said playing along, "these impressions are hard to pull off." But then Malcolm put the fedora on Victor's head turning him into Manitoba Smith who said, "G'day mates. What can I do for ya this time? Is there another dinosaur?"
"No, we are cool," Mari replied, "we just want to find a big red gem."
"Red gem," Manitoba said intrigued, "I'm in. I'm naturally drawn to riches and precious minerals." He licks his finger and puts it up in the air for a few seconds before saying, "Come on. This way." The Marmosets followed Manitoba through the tunnel.
Confessional: Maybe that would be good for Victor's resume for geology.
Manitoba Smith: When I'm not saving damsels, I spend my free time looking for precious mineral because, let's face it, they look beautiful.
Meanwhile a bit behind, the Crazy Crocosaurs were recovering from friction burn in their hands from sliding down a deep pole.
"Ow, my hands hurt," Lauren groaned, "Stupid long-ass cable. Well we gotta put these arm bands on." So she threw two arm bands at her team mates and they all put them on. "Apparently these things will stay green for the first 15 minutes," she explained, "They will turn orange at 15 minutes, red at 5 minutes and a skull and crossbones means the lava's coming. I read the instructions."
"Eh, whatevs," Jim shrugged as he began conversing with Li Zhang, "So anyway, I beat of others that I find inferior. For example, Victor is a Jew and that is what my pa calls an unholy race; hence they are targeted. What do you think is an inferior race that must go?"
"How about the whole human race," Li said coldly as he held the fireflies, "you have no idea what they all put me through!"
"Woah," Jim gasped, "So what is it that made you seem inferior to them?"
"Ugh, I'd rather not say," Li muttered, "but seriously, it was bad. And I fear if you found out about it, you would just beat me up. I mean what if you met someone who saw you as weak?"
"That'll never happen," Jim said confidently.
"What about the Ku Klux Klan," Lauren commented up the front, "they're an ultra-conservative group that sees blacks as inferior scum, much like the loser Confederates."
"Well they're not here," Jim said smugly as he heard a low, ominous growl, "Um, did anybody hear that?"
"Let me see," Lauren said as she and the other Crocosaurs turned around to see a giant bald gopher roaring at them. They screamed at the sight and ran away from it.
Confessional: The Confederates were to America like America was to Britain, a rebellious state much like Kosovo to Serbia.
Jim: I wasn't scared! That gopher caught us by surprise!
Lauren: My dad always told stories about the KKK. He knows this because he had a black friend who was murder by them. Ouch.
Li Zhang: I'll give you a hint at my deformity that ruined my life. It involves my eyes! And that's all I'm saying.
Meanwhile with the Mad Marmosets, Aurora was conversing with Nessie.
"Wow, you smell really nice today," said Aurora, "what's your secret?"
"Oh please," Nessie said mockingly, "I'm not gonna tell you. Daddy doesn't want lowly commoners like you knowing secrets of his pretty little princess. Sorry if I hurt you."
"It's alright," said Aurora before noticing her arm band turn orange, "Oh no. We only have 15 minutes left!"
"Bugger me! Yer right," said Manitoba Smith as he noticed his arm band turn orange and he came across a mine cart, "Come on! We can use these to speed up the journey!"
So the Marmosets were on the mine carts riding on the rails.
"All right guys," Manitoba ordered, "We gotta stick together!"
"Um, I don't know about that," Malcolm said sceptically as he noticed that the other cart containing the girls was on the other rail.
"Well bugger me," Manitoba cursed, "alright ladies, jump down! I'll catch you!"
Mari was the first to jump off into the cart with Manitoba and Malcolm; she wanted to be with him (as Victor). Next came Jenny and then Nessie, the latter was reluctant as she feared ripped clothes but she did it anyway.
"Whew," she sighed, "I thought I was gone."
"Come on Aurora," Manitoba cheered, "you can do it! I'll catch you!"
"Okay," Aurora said hesitantly, "but I want to see Vito after this to make it worthwhile!" Unfortunately, the other mine cart went in another direction leaving no hope of rejoining her team mates. Eventually, she noticed that the track ahead was broken.
"Oh no," she screamed in fear of death before praying, "Oh God, I am so sorry for my valley girl attitude! Please don't send me to hell!" And then the cart flew off into the crevice.
Confessional: Here lies Aurora. She looked cute and died cute. Wait what? She's still alive?
Aurora: I honestly thought I would die like that! But somehow I didn't because of some flying bug. It's too complicated to explain really.
Meanwhile with the Crazy Crocosaurs, Lauren, Li Zhang and Jim were running away from the giant gopher.
"So tell me L," Jim asked Lauren, "Is this the Ku Klux Klan?"
"Not exactly but close," Lauren responded as she noticed her arm band turn orange, "Oh crap, we only have 15 minutes!"
"How about less," Li Zhang shouted as they saw a cliff ahead of them; it was either jump off and risk dying that way or get eaten alive. Li ran the fastest so he stopped first. Then Lauren bumped into him and finally Jim; the force was enough to push Li off the cliff and the fireflies along with it.
"Nice going brickhouse," Lauren scolded Jim.
"Alright I'm sorry," Jim apologized, "for that one accident only. Might as well beat this guy up."
So Jim began beating the living crap out of the gopher sending it underground.
"Nice one," Lauren commended Jim as she noticed a green glimmer in the distance, "Hey, that's our gem! Let's take that narrow path right at the wall. It'll be like a video game."
"Eh, when in Rome," Jim shrugged as he and Lauren began shuffling along the wall being careful so as to not fall down to oblivion.
Confessional: The wall shuffle is a common feature in many platformer and action/adventure games. Don't believe me? See for yourself!
Jim: I never really was scared of that gopher. I've seen worse.
Lauren: Wall shuffling is not easy. Doing it in pitch black without a light source is even harder! My gymnastics skills are my back-up though.
Meanwhile in the mess hall, Chris has entered after a long hard day of getting rid of toxic waste.
"Oh boy, what a hard day," Chris said to himself, "But I've only now realized that I get paid that way. Good thing the show's paying for its arrivals so now I can be rich!"
"Um excuse me," the AVGN said from behind the counter, "what is this about this show buying toxic waste?"
"Hey, you heard nothing," Chris shouted.
"It's alright," the Nerd said apathetically, "I don't give a $#!% anyway." He proceeds to eat ice-cream.
"Um, excuse me bro," Chris asked the Nerd, "where did you get that ice-cream? This camp didn't come with any."
"Yeah, I made it myself," the Nerd responded, "I took classes for the hell of it. You know in cartoons when people eat ice-cream when they're sad? I'm doing the exact same thing. Wanna know why? I'm playing Peter Jackson's King Kong on the Nintendo DS! Now that is a $#!%ty game!"
"It's okay," Chris said, "I just wanted a latte." He went over to the kitchen to make a latte only to find the Nostalgia Critic doing the exact same thing.
"Um, Chris," the Critic asked, "what are you doing here? The waste won't remove itself you know."
"Yeah, I just wanted to take a little break and have a latte," Chris replied.
"No lattes for you," the Critic shouted, "Only I can drink them! Now piss off!"
Chris left the building quickly just as the Nerd began saying, "Yeah, show that asshole! And ask nothing about the ice-cream; I made to eat it in order to play a bad game."
"Fair enough," said the Critic.
Meanwhile back in the caves, Aurora was opening her eyes after a long hard fall.
"Oh crap," she cursed, "I'm in hell. Curse my indulgence in make-up and being smug about it!"
Suddenly, she heard some clapping from nearby. Its source was a purple giant dragonfly-like insect whose foremost legs became claws; it also has a prehensile abdomen and has oxygen tanks connected to a network of cables covering the thing as if it were life support. It said, "Ah yes, it's about time you confessed your sins, young lady."
"AHH," Aurora screamed at the sight, "Who are you!? The devil himself?"
"I do not know how your religion vorks," the insect responded, "but no, you're very much alive. Mein name is Noland by ze way. I am a huge fan of zis show."
"Okay, Noland," Aurora said quietly, "my name is Aurora. And what is with the German accent?"
"Yeah, I already know you name," Noland said deadpan, "And I don't know your nations either. I originally came here to check on Corey who unfortunately became petrified. You know zat guy?"
"Uh yeah," Aurora replied, "He was Jenny's love interest. Last we saw him, he was like el fuego but L ended up curing him. Then he saved us from petrification."
"Oh dear," Noland sighed, "and I know her name is Lauren. Right now I'm solving a puzzle involving Li Zhang and vhy he is so cynical. Why am I doing zis? For $#!%s and giggles of course. Anyvay, here's ze data I've recorded from repeated viewings and close observations."
Confessional: Noland also stars in Super Tai Galaxy. Read it if you can.
Aurora: That was so close! But I've gotta redeem myself. I guess being socialistic wasn't enough. I'm giving up the beauty business! It's been corrupting me! And now to learn about Li Zhang's darkest secrets.
Noland: Vhat I have realized is zat Li's eyes look weird. If you could rewatch all ze previous episodes, look closely under his hat and see vhat I mean.
Meanwhile over at the Mad Marmosets, its members (sans Aurora) were waking up from their mine cart falling over.
"Ugh, is everyone all right," Jenny asked to everyone and they nodded, "Good. Sucks about Aurora though. Well we don't have the time to look for her."
"Um, excuse me" Mari asked, "since when are the torches that powerful?"
"They're not," Jenny said after noticing that the area is brighter than usual then she looked at the lava pool to her right, "Does this answer your question?"
"Yeah, I guess so," said Mari.
"Well we gotta get Victor up," said Malcolm trying to get Victor up after the fedora had flown into the lava, "Come on partner, get up!"
"After a while, Victor finally got up only to say as Svetlana, "Okay, I'm up! I was dreaming about that hottie Abdul."
"Ugh," Nessie groaned, "don't tell me he's gay." The others looked at her in disapproval; then she said, "Oops. What about this guy?"
She was pointing at Li Zhang whose hat had flown off. He got up and felt his head; he kept his eyes closed as he desperately searched for his hat. After a while, he grabbed it and put it back on.
"Whew, that was close," Li sighed to himself, "I thought they saw my eyes."
"Um, what is wrong with your eyes," Mari asked to which Li Zhang gasped, "have you got conjunctivitis?"
"That's none of your business," he said coolly as he saw a red light, "I assume you idiots are searching for that are you?"
"Yes, we are Mr. Pervert," Jenny said sternly as she noticed some stairs leading up to it, "We'll be on our way then." She led her team up the stairs to the gem. Li Zhang, not giving up without a fight, decided to handicap them by throwing rocks at them to handicap them; one of them hit Svetlana to summon Chester.
"Hey, quit throwing your rocks you whippersnapper," Chester told Li off as he noticed this arm band turn red, "Hey what's with the colour change?"
"Oh no," Jenny said in horror as she looked at her arm band, "We only have 5 more minutes! We gotta get going guys!"
The Marmosets ran up while Li used kung-fu to jump his way up.
Confessional: Hurry now! The lava's coming!
Victor: Don't you just hate it when your alternate personalities come out at random? I do.
Li Zhang: Blast! I'll get them next time!
"What," Aurora gasped in shock after finally learning Li Zhang's secret, "He's been bullied over something like that!? That little tidbit is totally harmless!"
"I'm sorry but zat is vhat happened," Noland said as he was drawing something on his scrapbook, "So now I vill tell you some advice. Bullies are oblivious to the fact zat zey may vell be insulting zemselves as vell. No one person is exactly ze same; ze genes can alter at pure random like vhen your race developed blonde hair. You're aware of mutation right?"
"Um yeah," Aurora replied, "It's when your genes mix up giving you cool new features."
"Exactly," Noland confirmed, "Now, before I let you take ze ruby, I saved your sorry ass from oblivion 'cause you remind me of Mimi. She vas ein great singer! Okay, now you may take the gem." He then flew out of the cave so that Aurora could grab the ruby and hightail it out of the cave but then she ran into one last obstacle.
"Not so fast, Latina," Lauren said.
"Um, hello," Aurora reminded Lauren and Jim who blocked the exit, "we have like 5 minutes!"
"What," Lauren gasped as she noticed he arm band turn red, "Jim! Get the emerald! I'll slow her down!" So Jim ran up to take the emerald while Lauren held down Aurora. That's when Li Zhang and the Marmosets showed up.
"Aurora," Jenny ordered, "You have the ruby! Get the hell out of here!"
"What does it look like I'm doing," Aurora shouted as she broke free of Lauren as she ran out of the cave after Jim. Then Malcolm saw his arm band hit the skull and crossbones.
"Oh no," Malcolm shouted as the cavern shook from geothermal activity, "Quick! Everyone out!" He then went to pick up a tired Lauren and carried her out of the collapsing cave.
Meanwhile outside, the Nostalgia Critic eagerly awaited the campers' return from the cave while sipping his latte. He then notice Jim run out with the emerald.
"Looks like Jim made it out first," the Critic announced, "The Crocosaurs win!"
"Well, it's about time too," Jim exclaimed as Aurora ran out with the ruby followed by everyone else right before the exit closed off in a landslide.
"And who are you," the Critic asked Noland.
"I'm Noland," said the bug, "I'm volunteering for internship in honour of mein friend Corey. Yeah, I'm a huge fan of zis show!"
"Fair enough," said the Critic, "Marmosets, you have to figure out who to vote for tonight."
Confessional: At long last!
Aurora: Thanks a lot Noland! If you hadn't held me back, we would've won!
Jim: Looks like it's the Critic's trailer for us!
Meanwhile in the mess hall, Jonny and Weaselcake were playing Go Fish; the latter was glowing cyan to levitate the cards. Suddenly, the AVGN came in.
"Hey kid," the Nerd said, "I need to tell you something."
"Sure. Fire away," Jonny said.
"Well I've overheard Chris say something about this show paying nuclear power companies to dump waste on this island. From there they send the waste to the RCMP for profit needed to pay for the employees."
"What," Jonny gasped, "Is that true!?"
"Yeah, I don't believe it either," the Nerd responded, "But tomorrow I want you to monitor Chris and I don't mean like a partner, I mean in addition to that like a spy. Take note of what you see. You go that?"
"Uh okay," Jonny accepted.
Confessional: Uh oh, the plot thickens.
Jonny: If what the Nerd said was right, I should be able to show questionable evidence to the RCMP first chance I get. But it'll be a while to gather up anything worthwhile.
Later that night, all of the campers sat on the tree stumps for the elimination ceremony. The AVGN, Noland, Chris and Jonny stood near the flag pole and the Nostalgia Critic held a tray of eight marshmallows. Victor was seen downing a cola bottle.
"Um, Victor," Mari asked, "Why are you drinking cola?"
"It's for my Anarchy V act," Victor replied, "What happens when you down 5 bottles worth 600 millilitres each like I did? One big pee session in the a few hours."
"Okay then," Mari said as she poked his bloated belly filled with 3 litres of cola before resting her head on it and listening to gurgles.
"Well well well," the Critic said, "It's about time the Monkeys lost! Well actually they're called the Marmosets now but who cares? If you are of the Crazy Crocosaurs, please take your marshmallow."
Jim, Li Zhang and Lauren did just that, leaving only five marshmallows. Then the Critic continued, "Marmosets, I will explain to you how this goes just so you try this out yourself. These marshmallows represent life here on this island. When I call out your name, get a marshmallow. If you get nothing, you have to walk the Dock of Shame and board the Boat of Loser to get the hell out of here. And now the questions. Jenny, how do you feel about Li Zhang's stunt on you?"
"It was wrong and immature," said Jenny.
"Aurora, what are you hiding?"
"Just you wait Mr. Critic," Aurora said.
"And Victor, will you please do a one man show?"
"Uh, no," Victor declined.
"Okay then," said the Critic, "you may now go vote."
Confessional: It's voting time!
Nessie: Uh to be honest, I don't know who to pick. (She gasps as Bedlam takes over) I do. (She looks at the voting booth.
After the voting was done, the Critic noted something weird, "Well, looks like a unanimous vote tonight. But we'll get to that later. The first marshmallow goes to…"
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"Victor,"
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"Mari,"
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"Jenny,"
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"Nessie,"
There was now only one marshmallow left. Aurora and Malcolm looked on in suspense. "And now there is only one marshmallow left. Only one of you can have it and that person is…"
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"Malcolm."
Malcolm went to get his marshmallow while Aurora sat there watching the Venezuelan flag go down.
"Well Aurora," said the Critic, "you're out of the game now. Piss off."
"Fine by me," Aurora said calmly, "I have to atone for my stupid behaviour. I am as of now dumping Vito. Before I leave, I have one thing to expose about Li Zhang."
"You wouldn't dare," Li Zhang growled.
"Yes I would," Aurora continued, "Li Zhang is misanthropic because he was likely bullied a lot a few years back. All because of one deformity. And that is…"
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"Heterochromia!"
She quickly removed Li's hat to expose his mismatched eyes; the left one was green and the right one was blue.
"What do you think you're doing," Li Zhang shouted, "Do you want me to go through hell once again!?"
"That was because you were a mutant. And I've learnt that bullies go after wierdos like you. Now before you say anything, I would like to say that somehow, in our own little ways, we're all mutants. Think about it. A cave man wouldn't recognise us! Well, I better get going. See ya."
She left the island in a wave of goodbyes as the campers went back to bed, still shocked at the revelation. Li Zhang was no longer angry but rather very timid as he returned to the washrooms to be alone.
Confessional: I did not see that coming!
Li Zhang: How could she do this to me! Now the whole world knows! (Starts sobbing)
Jim: Mismatched eyes? That's it? Poor guy. No! No wimpy thoughts! His kind is inferior! I will not let my father down! (Sighs)
Nessie: (as Bedlam holding up 6 votes for Aurora) So long, loser. Hahahaha!
The Critic then went on the Dock of Shame to give the outro, "Oh boy. I did not see that coming! Well I guess it'll make room for more drama then! Will Li Zhang recover from the exposure? Will Lauren appreciate Malcolm's heroism? And what the hell is Victor planning? Find out next time on Total Drama Tween Island!"
And that was episode 7. I had fun writing for Aurora. I feel she was inspired by Mimi Tachikawa from Digimon. She cared for her looks a lot but had a good heart. Too bad this is where she leaves. Also, if you want to know more about Weaselcake, check out the Gmod videos staring him.
Votes
Aurora: N/A
Jenny: N/A
Malcolm: N/A
Mari: N/A
Nessie: Aurora x6
Victor: N/A
XXXXX
Aurora- 6 (the votes were tampered with)
Mad Marmosets: Jenny, Malcolm, Mari, Nessie, Victor.
Crazy Crocosaurs: Jim, Lauren, Li Zhang.
Eliminated: Midori, Jonny, Nickolas, Sheila, Abdul, Aurora.
Next time: Jonny becomes a detective, Victor's prank ends up affecting the whole cast and the immunity idol is found.