Disclaimer: Don't own, so don't sue!

LTJM: Yeah, poor Loomer, but hold your breath because it might just get worse. Don't worry, things will get better....or will they? Anyway, thanks for the review! Peace!

Ch 4: Drowning Lessons

"Fag! Fag! Fag!" the blurry faces around me chanted over and over. I felt myself spinning around and around. The faces blurring more and more until only words and sounds could penetrate my senses. The sounds of jeering and the word fag echoed throughout my mind over and over. My eyes saw black and the noises stopped abruptly.

A small light appeared, chasing away the darkness inch by inch until I could see four shadowy figures standing before me. I looked around by it looked like I was standing on an invisible platform in the middle of pitch black. The four figures before me seemed to float more than stand and I had yet to see their faces. Two were about the same height and standing closer together than the other two. The middle one was taller and bulkier and the last was shorter than all three and smaller in stature. There was no noise, not even breathing. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"Your worse than dirt, fag. Your going to Hell. You'll never be happy. Pray for death, fag, pray." came a familiar low gravelly voice.

'Dad, your wrong, your going to Hell!' I wanted to say, but I felt like I wasn't in control of my body. It felt cold and numb, unmoving. The only thing that seemed to work was my eyes and ears, for I could hear and see my father. His figure was illuminated in light and he began to laugh.

"Your wrong. Die." I didn't remember seeing him carrying a knife, but he had one in his hand as he lifted his arm and threw it. It flew in slow motion toward my face but I couldn't move out of the way, I was frozen to the spot.

'No!'

"NO!" I shot up and blinked rapidly. It wasn't dark or cold anymore, quite the opposite, but I was unfamiliar with my surroundings. I felt a cool hand on my forehead and turned to my left. A woman, who looked to be in her mid thirties, moved her hand back to her lap and smiled gently at me.

"You have a fever, a broken nose, a few broken bones, and a lot of bruising. You should lay down, your ribs aren't in very good shape." Just as she said that several spasms shot through my body causing immense pain. I groaned and let her lower me back down onto the couch I was laying on.

"Where am I?" I winced at how weak I sounded and the pain that speaking caused on my face.

"Your safe, I'm Laura Bigby. I believe your dating my son." she said slyly, not a spark of disgust on her face. I managed to quirk my lips in a small semblance of a smile.

"Yeah." The silence that followed was extremely awkward and I was about to fall asleep again when she spoke up.

"What happened Billy?" I snapped my eyes open and swallowed nervously. "Don't worry, I'm a therapist, whatever you tell me will stay confidential unless you wish otherwise. I'll treat you just like any other patient." 'Oh Lord, a shrink?! Just my luck...'

"I was kicked out and then I got into a fight at the park. Its no big deal." It was a lame story and I knew she knew I was lying, but she didn't push it, thankfully.

"Okay, get some sleep. You aren't going to school tomorrow."

"What about Ned?" I doubted him going to school alone was going to be pleasant. She smiled wryly.

"He isn't either." My face must have shown my confusion because she chuckled.

"We need somebody to take care of you while my husband and I are at work. Ned was happy to volunteer. Now sleep." I yawned and snuggled into the covers.

"Thanks." I mumbled. I heard her get up and walk away before falling into another fitful sleep.

I opened my eyes to see three shadowed figures. My father was gone but his laughter still rang through the air. Low and sinister. His body was gone but it felt like he was all around me. It felt like I was being watched but I couldn't turn my head to look around. I was still standing on the blackness but the 'air' around me felt heavier, more suffocating.

"Poor little gay boy. Mommy and daddy don't love you anymore. You don't have any friends now. Your reputation is gone, don't ever show your face around here again, or we just might bash it in." The two silhouettes were illuminated and I saw my two friends Jerry and Buzz taunting me. Their laughter mixed in with my fathers making a loud raucous noise that was beginning to make my head hurt.

The chanting began again, getting louder every passing moment. I heard the jeering and laughter multiply until it felt like I was in a small room packed with hundreds of people just laughing at me. Taunting me. Chanting 'Fag' over and over. The sounds bounced around in my skull until I thought my head would explode.

I felt claustrophobia overcome me and my throat constricted restricting each breath. I was drowning in the noise and I still couldn't move my body, just stare hopelessly as my 'friends' laughed and taunted me. They pointed and doubled over in laughter just like all those times I wedgied or tripped a kid.

'No stop it!' The chanting, taunting, and my father's sinister laugh warped around me, becoming louder and faster every second. I felt like my head was going to split open and something warm trickled down my neck on each side, pooling at my collarbone. Blood. MY. Blood.

"Agh, NO!" I ignored the pain that lanced through my head and chest as I struggled to gather my breath. I was gripping so hard my knuckles were white and my fingernails were tearing through the thin blanket and digging into my palms.

"Loomer, relax! It was just a dream!" My head shot to my left to see Ned looking worriedly at me. He placed his hands on mine and I relaxed them. He turned my hands over and grimaced at the wounds my fingernails created. "Lay down, I'll go get the first aid box."

I gingerly laid back, careful not to move to much. I reached my hands up to my neck and ears and sighed in relief when I felt no blood. I looked back up when Ned sat down again.

"Gimme your hands." I held them out and he clumsily cleaned and bandaged them. "That should be alright until my dad gets back. Hes the one that checked you over. Hes a doctor."

"So your moms a shrink and your dads a doctor? Damn."

"Yeah, its really unfortunate. I can't hide anything from my mom and my dad can tell when I'm faking a sickness." I snorted and he grinned.

"Yeah, just horrible." I joked. There was silence for a little while and we just watched the television until Ned broke it.

"So your dad..."

"...yeah."

"I'm sorry." I had to grin, Ned was too nice.

"It isn't your fault."

"Well, in a round about way, it is my fault." I looked over at him and raised an eyebrow. He was sporting a guilty look.

"How do you figure?" I was amused and couldn't wait to hear his reasoning.

"Well, if I hadn't said yes when you asked me out, you wouldn't be in this situation! Or if I hadn't came to the closet so late we wouldn't have been caught! Its my fault we got caught!" I was kind of hurt. 'He regrets being with me?' Instead of showing my hurt, I glared.

"If thats how you feel then maybe we shouldn't be together." Ned looked lost for a moment before looking shocked.

"What?! I don't want to break up!"

"Well, you obviously regret getting together!"

"No I don't! I'm glad we are together, I really like you! Besides, if there was ever a time to stick together, now would be that time!" I felt my anger drain away but I was still a little hurt.

"I like you too."

"So we aren't breaking up?" I smiled and shook my head.

"Naw, we aren't breaking up." He smiled back and leaned over to kiss my forehead lightly.

"Good." We sat in silence again watching TV when Ned broke the silence again, looking excited about something. "This is great!"

"What is?"

"We just had our first real fight! We're an official couple now!" If I was in one of those anime shows I love to watch all the time, I would have a huge sweat drop on my head.

"Uh, we weren't before?"

"Well, I guess technically speaking, yes we were, but now its like we just crossed the first bump in the road and we are closer now, right?" I couldn't help but snort, Ned was such a girl.

"Your such a girl, Ned." He rolled his eyes and smiled.

"Anyway, how do you think everyone at school is taking the news?" For a moment I thought back to my dreams, but shook that out of my head. I can't think like that.

"I don't know. I would hope that people are okay with it, but I've never been one for wishful thinking." Ned seemed to think about it before smiling.

"Whatever happens, I'm sure it'll be alright. If nothing else, we've got each other." I smiled at how corny he just sounded.

"As corny as that was, your right, and that is good enough for me." After that we just sat in silence together, enjoying the companionship, and watching TV. After a while I fell asleep again.

I sighed in annoyance when I recognized my surroundings. Another dream. Crap.

Only one silhouette stood in front of me and it was completely quiet, thankfully. I waited patiently for whatever this silhouette was going to say, silently pleading for something positive, but that would've been to good to be true.

"Its too much pressure. You'll break and let the only person who still cares for you down. He'll be crushed. He'll hate you forever. You have no one. Your a failure in everything that you do. Your a curse that brings misery to everything you touch." The figure stayed in the dark but I didn't need to see to know who it was.

'Ned, don't say that. We're in this together, right?' I wished so hard I could speak. If there was anyone I needed on my side, it was Ned.

"You'll sink under the pressure soon enough. You won't be able to handle it. Your a failure, always have been, always will be. Failure." I was sinking. I felt an unnatural weight on my shoulders, like the gravity had been turned up enough so that I couldn't lift my arms, or even a finger. My head fell to my chest under the unknown weight. My feet were slowly sinking into the blackness, one tiny bit after another.

I could only watch as the seconds ticked by like hours and each second my body sank more. I couldn't look up and I couldn't struggle. I was frozen in place. Complete silence encompassed me. At least with the noises from before, I knew I was alive, but it was so quiet and still now. I realized that the pressure on my body wasn't just from above, it was all around me. It was crushing my torso, so I couldn't breath, I couldn't even blink. I felt the same warmth slide down my neck from both of my ears and down my chin from my nose. I could see the droplets of blood fall from me in slow motion and disappear into the darkness with the rest of me.

I was now hip deep in darkness. My hands were completely submerged and it felt like gel. The blood pouring from my ears and nose continued to flow and I wondered if I would bleed to death before suffocating in the gel. The drops fell methodically, creating a dripping noise that was slowly driving me insane.

I wondered if Ned was still standing there, watching me slowly sink to my death. Thats all I could do now. Think. And Think. Nothing responded to my commands to move. I could only watch as the darkness crept up my torso slowly and think.

The darkness had swallowed my body up to my neck. I stopped thinking a while back and just watched.

Closer.

Up to my chin.

Over my mouth.

Filling up my nostrils.

My eyelids slide shut.

Almost there-

"Wake up!" came a small echo.

'What?' I wanted to open my eyes, but the gel was sealing them shut.

"Jesus, wake up!" the echo came again, louder this time.

'I can't.' I willed my eyes to open up with every last bit of strength, but they wouldn't.

"WAKE UP!" the words were loud and pleading. They didn't echo and it sounded like they were shouted right in my ear. My eyes slowly opened.

"What the-? Ned?" Ned's face was inches from mine. He looked frightened and scared, like he was about to cry. "What's wrong?"

"You stopped breathing...."

......What will happen next!?!?! You'll only know if you read the next chapter or read whats below and use your imagination! Whatever works!

I love twists, but poor Loomer! In the next one Ned gets some angst, too! Yay for Angst! But I also love me some Fluff, so yay for Fluff!