Total Drama Tween Island Chapter 20: Total Barf-fest, a Total Drama series + Web Shows Crossover fanfic

Disclaimer: Total Drama is owned by Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network while the Nostalgia Critic is owned by Doug Walker of Channel Awesome and the AVGN is owned by James Rolfe of Cinemassacre.

After finishing round 1, which were simply bananas, the kids went on to round 2, which was chocolate cake.

"Hey, why's the cake a bit dry," asked Lauren.

"Yeah, I forgot the *$&#ing milk," the AVGN confessed while Sh*t Pickle was pissing Lauren off.

Mari appeared to be the only one who is not eating any part of the cake.

"Do I really have to do this," Mari sighed, "I just got reminded of Angelina's superior body. I am not getting fat!"

'Nessie' thought about this and ended up saying, "Well unfortunately, if you don't do what everyone else is doing, you will never be cool again."

Mari then reluctantly began to eat her cake.

Confessional: Pick your poison. Weight gain or ridicule.

Mari: I'm sorry. I don't like ridicule. Nor do I like hard scenarios.

Bedlam: You saw what I did. When you exploit other peoples' weaknesses, you can get them to do as you say. That is my strategy for this game.

After the contestants had finished the cake, the Nostalgia Critic announced, "Okay, that was too easy. But then, your stomachs have limited capacity so it may get harder later. Now we are up to round 3!"

Chef got 8 bowls of ice-cream that the Nerd prepared and distributed them among the kids.

"Hold it," Lauren said quickly, "You know I am lactose intolerant!"

"Oh what," the Nerd said frustratedly, "Well tough $#!%. That's all you're getting!"

Anyway, the kids were enjoying their ice-cream, including Malcolm.

"Wow," he exclaimed, "You can make milk into this? No wonder it's so good! I love milk!"

"Well good for you," said Victor.

"I don't want to complain or anything," Jim interrupted, "but I was kinda expecting steak for lunch instead of wussy dessert stuffing. At least have someone barf already!"

So then round 3 was over and everyone was feeling a tad full. As for Lauren, her belly was gurgling loudly and she was groaning a bit.

"Cut me a break," Lauren groaned in between gurgles, "if there is one more dairy food then I'm out of here!"

"Uh oh," the Critic said, "Looks like Lauren is already having a stomach ache."

"What's going on," Leroy said waking up, "I'm hungry."

"Leroy, you'll have to wait until someone barfs," the Critic said sternly, "only then will you take their food."

"Fair enough," said Leroy as he went back to sleep.

Victor was rubbing his full belly when he noticed Mari was looking a bit bloated. He poked her belly to hear her giggle when Kyle showed up.

"What the hell are you doing," Kyle asked.

"Vicky's tickling me," Mari said gleefully.

"What, her tummy's poking out," Victor responded, "I couldn't resist."

"Whatevs," said Kyle, "You see Leroy? If you spew, he takes your food."

"Fair enough," said Victor.

"Okay, on to Round 4," the Critic announced as Chef laid down 8 chocolate milkshakes.

"Oh cool," Sheila said as she quickly started drinking her shake.

"Oh you've gotta be kidding me," Lauren groaned in disbelief.

Malcolm saw that his girlfriend was in distress so he raised his hand after finishing his shake.

"Yes, Malcolm," said the Critic, "What do you want?"

"Lauren isn't looking too good," Malcolm replied, "Could I have her shake?" Lauren could only smile at that.

Confessional: How cute.

Lauren: Normally I wouldn't let anyone say my real name. But Malcolm is my boyfriend so I can make exceptions. Besides, he stood up for me. (Belly starts gurgling and she clutches it in pain).

"No can do," the Critic denied, "If she pukes, it goes to Leroy. You know, the pink monster."

"Sorry sir," Malcolm said in disappointment.

"Ugh," Lauren groaned, "Do I have to do this?"

"It either that or a big wedgie after this," Jim threatened.

So Lauren gulped and slowly drank her shake through the straw, with her stomach pains getting worse as time passed.

"Okay, I can't do this," Lauren said very sickly, "I think I might…" Her cheeks puffed up indicating that she may have to puke now.

"Okay, that's enough," Sheila declared as she finished her shake to get up and help Lauren to the bin, "Follow me now." She directed Lauren over to the bin so that the tomboy could let it all go in there.

"Oh, and Lauren is out," the Nostalgia Critic announced, "You know what that means."

Kyle grabbed what was left of Sheila's shake and threw it into Leroy's mouth as the monster yawned and then ate it.

"Well, that's that," said Sheila as her belly gurgled and it was already a bit big, "Ooh, that was a bit much."

"Aw, that is bull$#!%," the AVGN denied tauntingly, "there's still like 3 rounds left! I'm just about to finish making round 5. Wait right here."

As the Nerd worked on the 5th round, Sh*t Pickle was being all around annoying to the Crocosaurs what with the constant bouncing around the place and calling out its own name repeatedly.

"Hey! Get away from me," Li Zhang shouted as Sh*t Pickle bounced over near him. The smell of the thing was enough to make him projectile barf on the thing and onto Chris, leading to a lot of laughter.

"Dude, that was not cool," Chris complained.

"Then go clean up," the Critic ordered Chris, "Li. Get out."

"Fine," Li Zhang said not caring, "Not like I cared about this challenge anyway." So the boy went outside.

"Well with that," Chris announced just as he was about to leave, "the Marmosets are still fully intact but it looks like the Crocosaurs need to start holding it in big time." He then left to clean up.

"Hey Nessie," Malcolm said to the cowgirl, "You're getting a bit big there."

"Hey," 'Nessie' retorted after looking at her bloated stomach, "So are you!" Just then a big strawberry tart was presented to her, "Even so, I gotta win this!"

Confessional: Your stomach will lose no matter what!

Li Zhang: Cut me a break! The pickle made me do it! I saw it run off into the woods but who cares!?

Bedlam: I am not fat! I'm just a little bloated. (Pats her stomach). I can take a little more. Everyone else will likely pop if they don't puke!

Lauren: (Pukes into a bucket that's in her hands).

"Noland," the Nostalgia Critic requested the big bug, "Please make sure Chris goes back to the corner."

"Jawohl," said Noland as he flew outside as the campers ate their tarts. Due to being full, they ate slower than before.

"Ooh," Mari groaned as she rubbed her belly halfway through her tart, "my tummy hurts. I wanna stop!"

"Hey, no leaving the table until you puke," the Critic yelled.

Mari was just about to stick her finger down her throat when Victor started to rub her belly when he was done and then she burped in response, "Thanks Vicky."

Victor blushed at this as he took a bit of tart and put it in Mari's mouth to eat while the pressure's off.

"Ugh crud," 'Nessie' moaned at this, "Screw this!" she walked over to the bin to stick her finger down her throat and throw up into the bin to leave the mess hall and her tart went to Leroy.

Confessional: God forbid if she did it elsewhere that was likely 'working class' standard.

Bedlam: Look at those two! Being all lovey-dovey and $#!%. That makes me sick!

Sheila was slowly going through her tart burping and belly rubbing in intervals when she noticed Jim was going through it easily.

"Jim, you have a banana, a slice of chocolate cake, some ice-cream, a glass of milkshake and now a really big tart in your stomach," she pointed out, "how are you not sick by now!?"

"What can I say," Jim said confidently, "my stomach is big unlike yours! I can finish all 7 rounds and still not get sick."

"Is that confidence genuine of merely a façade to cover up your inner insecurity," she stated cryptically. This made Jim a little nauseous and he went to the bin to puke.

Confessional: Well played, hippy girl, well played.

Jim: How dare she! I thought Nick was joking when he said Sheila could see into people's minds! I'm just a little scared of dad, that's all! He's all I'm scared of.

"Oh dear," the Critic announced, "Only Shiela remains for the Crocosaurs. Will she fair against 3 Marmosets? I doubt. Now, is anyone ready for round 6?"

"I don't know sir," Malcolm said rubbing his big, gurgly belly, "I'm feeling really full here! I might pop if I continue."

"Really," the Critic questioned, "Well, can you resist chocolate?"

"Chocolate," Malcolm squealed in glee as Chef handed out 4 6x21 chocolate bars among the contestants. Malcolm was quickly going through his bar now completely ignorant of his bloated belly.

Confessional: No-one can resist chocolate right?

Malcolm: Back at the commune, there was this girl who made chocolate in the communal kitchens because she felt like it. I usually went there to relieve myself of stress because it was so good! Too bad she was like 18 but who cares now that I have Lauren?

Meanwhile, Chris was showing to get all the barf off of him. On his way out he bumped into Noland.

"And vhere are you going," asked Noland.

"How about if I rest in my cabin," Chris replied.

"Not vhile I'm here," Noland ordered, "you are going back to ze corner!"

"Hahaha," Chris laughed mockingly, "You and what army bug-brain."

Noland promptly grabbed Chris by the midriff and carried him away much to Chris's surprise.

Back at the mess hall, the remaining competitors had opened their flies to let their distended stomachs hang out. Victor was slowly going through his insanely large chocolate bar and putting bits of Mari's into her mouth much to her pleasure. Sheila too was taking slowly but was spending most of her time rubbing her aching stomach and burping.

As for Malcolm he was eating so fast that he started to choke.

"Oh $#!%," Kyle cried in shock, "Would someone care to do the Heimlich manoeuvre on this kid!?"

Chef quickly grabbed Malcolm and started to squeeze his midsection in the hope that he could start breathing again but since his stomach was loaded beforehand, he just puked…

…

Right on Chris as he re-entered the bulding.

"Ugh, dude," Chris complained, "I just cleaned myself!"

"Oh boy," the Nerd laughed, "this is *^$#ing funny! Back to the showers again!

"Oh my gosh," Malcolm screamed in shock at what he did, "I am so sorry!"

"Well Malcolm," announced the Critic, "you're out!"

As Malcolm left the building, what remains of his chocolate bar went to Leroy.

"As for the rest of you," the Critic continued, "Hurry up already! We gotta get to round 7!"

"And what might that be," Sheila sickly burped as her bar was finished.

"I'll explain what it is once the other two are done," the Critic finished as Mari and Victor had finished their bars, "Good. Our final course is pancakes! With maple syrup and strawberries."

"Yeah, I put so much work in these ^#*&ers so I'd like to see at least one of you eat it all," the Nerd taunted as he put down 3 plates of pancakes for Chef to pick up, "Chow down, mother^*#$ers!"

And with that, Chef laid down the pancakes in front of the remaining eaters, each plate having a stack of three.

"Okay, this is the home stretch," Sheila said to herself amongst her stomach gurgles, "I may feel very full and bloated, bordering on sick even and close to bursting, but I'm not stopping now!" She went ahead.

As for Victor, he too was munching down on his pancakes not paying attention to his swollen and gurgly stomach.

"Hey Mari," he said to his remaining teammate, "Want me to feed you like last time?"

"No way," Mari groaned, "I feel so sick! That's it! I'm done! You can finish this without me!"

She stood up and the damage had been done, her belly looked like a balloon that was overfilled. She walked over to the bin with one hand on her mouth and the other on her sore belly. Once she got there, she let it all out meaning her pancakes went to Leroy.

"This is delicious," Leroy commented, "I want more."

"Sorry but you can't have any more unless one of these kids throws up," Kyle explained when he noticed that both Victor and Sheila, against all odds, ate all of their pancakes, "which isn't remotely the case right now."

Confessional: So close yet so far.

Victor: (his belly is very big and gurgly) Back home, me and my brother Jacques used to play the milk challenge together. After so many years of practice and barfing, I could now hold the gallon plus a bit more.

Sheila: (her belly is very big and gurgly) Yeah, I kind of have a weak spot for lollies and desserts. One time back home, there was this orange tree in the backyard full of oranges. Ever since I was a little girl I always ate all of them in one sitting before going to bed with a bucket close by. Now I could hold in about 15 oranges worth before I got sick.

Mari: I'm sorry but I don't think I'll be touching anything sweet ever again! (burps sickly) I'm going on a vegan diet for 3 days after this except for broccoli. (Spews in the hole in the seat).

After round 7, Victor and Sheila were called to stand up for a potential tie breaker. They were both rubbing their badly aching bellies which had grown to basketball sized and were hard as rocks.

"You two were amazing," the Nostalgia Critic said to the two of them, "I honestly thought you would lose long before this point. But now look at you! You look like you're having babies at 30 weeks! But you are both on different teams so I think it makes sense we go to a tie breaker."

"What are we supposed to eat now," Sheila groaned.

"Yeah. Any more and we may burst under the pressure," Victor groaned.

"Exactly," the Critic continued, "but I think the deciding factor would be the wafer thin mint." He then held up to such mints and gave one to each kid. They ate things and the Critic waited for what happened next. Suddenly, both of the kids' bellies were gurgling really loudly and their cheeks puffed up ready to spew…

…

Just Chris went back in; it was Victor who projectile barfed on him while Sheila managed to hold hers down.

"Oh come on," Chris moaned in frustration, "that's the third time now!"

"Oh yeah, you know the drill by now," the Nerd mocked Chris.

"And Sheila wins for the Crazy Crocosaurs," the Critic announced much to her excitement. She was then approached by Victor.

"Wait, you're not mad because you're stomach's weaker than mine right," Sheila suspected.

"No way," Victor replied, "The very fact that you ate way more than anyone normally would in one go and still not spew and be thin while you're at it meant you were the better player. Now if you excuse me, I gotta puke some more." He rushed out of the building to puke in the toilets.

Meanwhile at the Dock of Shame, Li Zhang was sitting and waiting.

"If I wanted to reveal my history, I'd start small with Lauren," he thought, "I saw her go for a swim. She should be back by now."

It was a while before Lauren climbed up the dock after a long hard swim. She was once again in her orange one-piece but this time she has no cap but rather goggles.

"Hey Li," she greeted, "What are you doing here? Here to stare at my body? Well don't! I know it's tempting given how my swimsuit is super tight on me but seriously, don't!"

"Hey, I wasn't planning on that," Li Zhang retorted, "I really came here to tell you exactly why I used to hate people so much."

"Oh, sorry," Lauren apologised, "I'm just a little sensitive. I need a new swimsuit. Yeah, I just swam an entire lap around the island. I saw a really, really tall cliff, the docks from which we went to Boney Island, a mansion of some sorts and a few sharks. Sorry, went off track. What did want to say?"

"Why I used to be so spiteful towards others," Li Zhang repeated.

"Very well then" Lauren accepted, "Lay it on me."

"Alright," Li Zhang began, "I used to live somewhere in the Qinghai province of China. In my preschool years, life was stable. But everything changed when I started school."

"What happened then," Lauren asked.

"Well as you know, I have heterochromia aka mismatched eyes. I was considered a weirdo in class and thus my classmates made fun of me."

"Don't some people grow out of ridiculing others based on appearances," Lauren questioned.

"These people didn't," Li Zhang yelled, "In fact, it got worse over the years. When I turned 10, they practically started vandalising my house! My parents tried to stop them but they were too weak."

"Did they come out alright though," Lauren asked shaking in fear.

"No," Li replied grimly, "They were killed! Those were the same people that mocked me! They wanted me dead! So then I thought 'That's it!' I escaped to the mountains and spent the next two years in isolation. I had since declared humanity the ultimate demon. I… I…"

He stopped talking and started crying hard onto Lauren shoulders. She in response was shushing him.

"There there," she consoled, "No reason to cry. I don't want you to start hating people again. Look I know how you feel. I've had a bully problem myself and did get grouchy. But do you want to know why I didn't start hating people?"

"What," Li sobbed and sniffled.

"I've always had lasting support that is my mom," Lauren continued, "I was because of her I took gymnastics lessons and started giving them karma. I became a very popular student. People looked up to me but now that I've moved I feel a little guilty. But you know what, they knew I was leaving and thus trained to defend themselves in my honour. Plus I get to gather a new set of fans and admirers."

"You just got lucky there," Li mumble cynically, "I got strong after I gave up on humanity."

"Oh and another thing," Lauren lectured, "That was just one individual population of people. I'm sure there are plenty of others that are much friendlier. To give up now is really kind of immature don't you think?"

"Really," Li Zhang realised how stupid he was, "you're right! People can be a stupid pile of goat $#!% but it's good to know there are plenty of others who are much more decent. I've been even more of a fool than a Pollyanna! Just please don't tell anyone else. This is my business."

"Your secret's safe with me," Lauren said.

Confessional: That's how it happened? Wow!

Li Zhang: I am so glad this is off my chest. Lauren I believe is the most trustworthy person around here as well as the one I hung out with the most so it made sense to start with her. Do keep in mind; I'm still a tad cautious around people.

Lauren: Well, that's that. I wonder what happened to those losers that made him like that.

Meanwhile in the communal washrooms, Mari was done spewing into the toilet and trying to catch her breath.

"Okay, that was so gross," Mari said to herself when she heard someone else spewing into another toilet, "Vicky?"

She came out to see Victor letting fly into the john. He got off to rub his aching belly.

"Oh boy," he moaned sickly, "I'm never doing that again."

Mari approached Victor and greeted, "Hi there. Um, thanks for helping me out in the challenge today. If it weren't for you, I'd have lost the game at the end of round 4. So what happened?"

"Well out of me and Sheila," Victor explained, "I puked first. And on Chris no less."

"Don't remind me bro," Chris shouted from the shower to which both kids giggled.

"Anyway," Victor continued, "Sorry I failed my team."

At this, Mari thought hard at who should go: not her or Victor that's for sure but then she said, "Um, Vicky. I… I have something to say to you."

"What is it," Victor asked.

The only response to that was Mari pulling Victor in for a kiss, quite a passionate one no less. It was about 3 minutes before they pulled apart.

"Oh my god," Victor said in ecstasy, "Now I know how Malcolm feels. My first kiss! You mean you were in love with me this whole time?"

"Yes Vicky," Mari replied, "When I first saw you, I knew you were kind of cute. And your impressions are either really cool or funny. So, are you happy that we are now together?"

"You betcha," Victor said.

"Good, because I have one more thing to say," Mari concluded, "since we lost, I was thinking we should get rid of Malcolm. Why not Nessie? Because I still think she's kinda sweet on the inside. We only saw her dark side though."

"Well to be fair, most of us have one," Victor commented while thinking, "I hope Malcolm understands." "It's all a matter of keeping it private or using it where it really matters. Mine's on getting hard on Chris."

"I heard that," Chris shouted as he left the shower.

"Yeah I know I should cry for you right now," Noland said from the entrance, "But don't you have a time out to attend to?"

"Fine," Chris submitted amidst giggles from Mari and Victor who quickly got back to kissing.

Little did they know that 'Nessie' was eavesdropping the whole time.

Confessional: Oh boy.

Bedlam: So Mari still trusts that useless harlot known as Nessie? And she dragged her now-boyfriend Victor in to get rid of Malcolm? For security's sake, I'll just play along. See where this goes.

Later that night, the remaining 8 campers gathered at the elimination ceremony with Chef and Chris at the flags to the left of the oil drum, the AVGN, Noland and Kyle to the right and the Nostalgia Critic at the centre with 7 marshmallows on the plate.

"Um, L," Sheila said curiously to Lauren, "Why do you look a bit damp?"

"I'm not really a big fan of sweet foods," Lauren replied, "They make me slower and less flexible. I had to swim around the whole island just to burn them off." She noticed that Sheila was still very bloated and then joked, "And another thing, is it a boy or a girl?"

"Oh you," Sheila laughed as she rubbed her big gurgly belly, "I wish but the only thing I can give birth to now is a really big poo. And besides, I'm 12 years old; why would I want my own kids now?"

"Just messing with you," Lauren responded.

"Well as I've observed, maybe the team swap was a good idea," announce the Critic, "the Crocosaurs have made a serious comeback! And I do believe Chef is glad to make a recovery. I'm pretty sure you all know the drill by now so let's ask some questions. Lauren, how could having lactose intolerance make you barf? It affects the bowels!"

"I guess the gassy pain was so great that it made me want to spew," Lauren replied.

"Mari, how do you feel about being Victor's girlfriend?"

"I feel like I'm in heaven," Mari replied airily.

"Jim, what the hell are you hiding? A life of child abuse?"

"Hey shut up," Jim retorted, "That's none of your beeswax!"

"Fine," said the Critic, "Marmosets, time to vote!"

Confessional: It's voting time!

Bedlam: (She holds up a picture of Malcolm). The perfect scapegoat. Hahaha!

Malcolm: (He holds up a picture of Nessie). I still don't trust her.

After the votes were cast, the Critic said, "Alright, Crocosaurs take your marshmallows."

The Crazy Crocosaurs got their respective marshmallows leaving only 3 left.

"Now as usual," the Critic continued, "When I call your name, get your damn marshmallow…"

…

"Mari,"

…

"Victor,"

Only Malcolm and 'Nessie' were left without marshamllows. "And the final marshmallow goes to…"

…

"Nessie."

Upon that, 'Nessie' gladly got her marshmallow as the flag for the Central Commune went down.

Malcolm then stood up and said, "Well, there goes my chance for money. Come to think of it, I don't know what that is. I lived in a commune for Pete's sake! Never mind; Victor, you'll have to go on without me."

"I'll survive buddy," Victor saluted.

"Lauren," Malcolm said as he approached his girlfriend, "Goodbye."

He gave her one last kiss leaving her to blush as he got on the Boat of Losers and it sped off into the night.

"Well, that's that," said the Critic, "Now Sheila, I promised you a special prize for yourself tomorrow if you were the last one standing in the eat-off. Care to wait until then?"

"Yeah, I think that would be preferable," said Sheila as she burped from rubbing her belly.

"Good," the Critic concluded, "Well you and the others can go to bed now."

The final 7 went off to bed so that the Critic could give the outro.

"Well, we now have our final 7," he announced, "From now on, there will be no more team challenges. It will be every dude and dudette for themselves. Who will pull through? Who will suffer? Find out next time on Total Drama Tween Island!"

And that's episode 9. I originally planned to have Malcolm go much further into the game but then I realised he would become a bit boring so this is where he stops. He's been a good aid to Victor, now he must go it alone! Whether or not you like Malcolm, stay tuned!

Votes

Malcolm: Nessie

Mari: Malcolm

Nessie (Bedlam): Malcolm

Victor: Malcolm

XXXXX

Malcolm- 3

Nessie- 1

Mad Marmosets: Mari, Nessie, Victor.

Crazy Crocosaurs: Jim, Lauren, Li Zhang, Sheila.

Eliminated: Midori, Jonny, Nickolas, Sheila, Abdul, Aurora, Jenny, Malcolm.

Next time: The kids prepare for a talent show! Also Bedlam starts being naughty.