Mako Mori knows this will most likely go wrong.

She knew it the moment she lifted her black umbrella to meet Raleigh Becket for the first time, heavy rain and the hustle of a resistance carrying on in the background.

She knew that no matter how badly she wanted to be a jaeger-pilot, to bring some sense of vengeance to the board, to finally prove herself- she shouldn't have.

So, behind her want and determination she knew, back then, that when she asked Pentecost to go up against Raleigh to test their physical compatibility she was only going to set herself up.

Of course, she wasn't wrong. Of course, Raleigh wants her to be his co-polit.

Conflicted, both accomplishment and dread filled her at that moment.

And something unfamiliar, deep in her chest, simmering with warmth.

Looking back on it, Mako should have been aware far earlier, should have quit before she was too deep.

But, really, she actually couldn't have.

The world needed saving, it still does.

She's supposed to stand here in the connpod and feel prepared to go out there, to face the giant alien monsters that wait deep in the ocean, ready to be a hero.

But right now, unfortunately, Mako doesn't.

Honestly, she feels all to anxious, far too split, undecided about her own internal conflicts and emotions.

Because, hell why didn't she notice beforehand?

Something should have hinted at it, at least. She should have caught herself slipping before she fell.

Mako didn't though, so she stands here, across from Raleigh, and drowning with the realization that she thinks she might love him.

A part of her, perhaps the reasonable part, wishes to go back in time to warn herself. To, like... see if she can avoid this.

She isn't exactly sure how any of that will work.

In fact, she has no clue. Who knows? Maybe she'll look away whenever Raleigh's about to smile. Maybe Mako will forget all about eating together, high up and bathed in warm, orange-ish lighting as they gazed upon their- the jaeger. Dismiss the way the memory still pulls at her, still makes something crawl up her throat and threaten to expose her childish feelings.

Mako knows she most definitely has to prevent herself from thinking about how it felt when Raleigh held her, how he was practically an anchor for her as she embarrassingly chased the rabbit, helping her be guided back to what was real in that moment, not some memory from years ago.

But that will be very, very difficult. She knows that much.

With little knowledge on what to even do with her emotions, with her love, whether she should feel this way or not, she hesitates before looking over at Raleigh, all suited up in shiny black as he gazes at her, focused.

Maybe it's because of their previous time in the drift together, maybe it's all of their time in general. Maybe a bit of both. But she feels it, feels him and her lips press into a thin line, blinking slowly.

It's that small moment of humble acceptance, knowing even the best of their performance might not cut it, that they might not return.

That here, in the jaeger, may be where both of them lose together.

It is true, yes, but Mako shifts uncomfortably because why wouldn't it be only natural for her to finally notice she's in love with Raleigh right before they just might die.

It is painfully unfair, she's upset, she wants to say something about it, express her frustration towards the world for making it this way and turn to Raleigh and tell him how much he means to her.

But Mako doesn't, instead, she freezes when Raleigh shoots her a concerned and curious look.

Of course she was ridiculous enough to forget that it's a two-way street, that he can read her just as much as she can read him.

"You okay, Mako?" He asks, and even the way he has almost always made sure twists her stomach, that unfamiliar feeling returning to her far too often to be named that anymore. It's practically one of the top three prominent things she does feel every time she is around him.

Which she doesn't really want him to catch onto yet. As if they have the luxurious guarantee of tomorrow. She knows they don't, but still hides that bit of her away from Raleigh, still cowards out of telling him.

Instead, she half-lies so at least she's telling some truth. "Yes, just... trying to do my best. For everyone, for the world."

They just click together so easily it's hard to deny their dynamic is smooth, molded with scolding yet providing hands that give Mako a hard time when she wants to move on from loving him.

So she watches, the back of her mind in awe, as Raleigh nods, understanding instantly as he looks at her. "The pressure. I get it. But don't let that go to your head, Mako, don't let your fighting skills get impaired."

Mako nods, holding her breath.

"You're great in a jaeger, the drift is strong," Raleigh says, so sure and firm Mako believes him as he glances ahead. throat bobbing. "You can do it. We can finish this."

Mako hates how, in a moment like this, with the fate of the Earth relying on them, how she registers the blush on her cheeks.

It's up to her, Raleigh Becket, Stacker Pentecost and Chuck Hansen to destroy the breach and save the world.

She still isn't okay with the mere thought of Pentecost being in a jaeger. Having it be the reality sends her off the edge. But she pushes that down because what can you really expect in a 'go big or go extinct' situation. Nothing good.

Still, she stays standing, waiting in the conn pod with Raleigh and regaining herself as she peeks over at him. "You?" She prompts, and Raleigh quickly figures out that she's now asking if he's okay.

The first thing she gets is a long sigh, and between silences and workers running around to get ready, she has no idea what that is supposed to entail.

"I'm alright." He tells her, it is not the entirety of it, though, Mako knows it. Then wonders how simple it must be for Raleigh to catch onto her lies. Her head spind s a little, but she manages to find herself with some footing, blinking up at him. "But I think even winning will cost us at this point. I believe in us, definitely. Just-"

He stops there, eyes averting some place elsewhere and Mako's eagerness to know what he was going to say burns the folds of her brain, desire blooming inside her at the worst time when her mind tries to distract her and focus on the echo of Raleigh's laugh from hours ago.

She has a possible clue, with the drift advantage and all.

It's intense for a second, she feels it, Raleigh's aching need to say one last thing while his body refuses the request.

Mako frowns. "What?"

Raleigh blinks, surveys the whole conn pod, and bites his cheek when he finally lets his eyes settle on Mako.

"Nothing, I can tell you when we get back."

Mako takes the defeat regrettably, and nods as it falls into a suffocating silence where they both try to hide their thoughts.

It doesn't last too long though, because a bit of Raleigh shifts, a piece of him saying 'screw it' as he stands up straight.

"You know, Mako, all those years I spent living in the past. I never really thought about the future," Raleigh says, honest, genuine, and of course he glances over at her, sparing a small smile. "Until now."

Mako's heart thumps. Raleigh huffs.

"I never did have very good timing."

And she's never been so torn on whether to hate or love someone like this until now.

She swallow, unsure, heartbeat in her ears. "What does that mean?"

Again, Raleigh leaves her without a proper answer as he grins wide enough to cover any hints of regret. "Tell you after we save the world, okay Mako?"

She wants to decline, wants to ask him over and over again to tell her right now or she may never hear it. That this is there last chance to say anything.

But, thinking about it, it's hypocritical seeing as she won't dare to open up about the way she feels towards him, the way she wants him, the way she cares for him so, so, so much.

So they both end up saying nothing about.

Underwater, Mako lifts her hand, holding a button so everyone can hear her and forcing herself not to cry. The jaeger is in a bad shape, ocean water is probably leaking in somewhere. Oh wait it is, she can see it. And they don't have a giant robot arm, either.

What's really the worse, though, is Pentecost is saying his goodbyes, and she doesn't want to believe it, like a little kid.

But of course Raleigh ends up being right about this, of course Pentecost tells her that he'll always be there. In the drift.

She says it at once, hoping he heard, that she loves Pentecost, her father, hopes he knows she won't give up.

Mako doesn't choke on the humid air when he's gone, doesn't buckle over, and it's for him, it's for the world- but mainly, during that moment- it was for her father.

Pentecost is right, she can find him in the drift. Even when he's dead. She knows it.

When Mako's eyes flutter open, everything is a bit blurry at first, the sound of waves sloshing against one another is a little disorderly, a lot of uneasing.

But it comes back to her like a spring as the pod opens up and oxygen nearly swallows her whole, once deprived from it, she takes a big breath before looking around with desperate eyes.

Where is Raleigh?

Mako tries to stay a little optimistic, but it's impossible. She can't be the only jaeger polit who survived. She doesn't want to be. There's no way he's gone.

Then, a little ways, the second pod- Raleigh's pod- emerges from the water, surfacing and Mako doesn't hesitate one second to dive into the ocean and swim over.

Heart pounding, heat pounding even louder, she settles herself ontop of the pod, rushing and urgent as she opens it up.

Mako can not lose him too. Simply refuses. So she reaches for him, cupping the sides of his face and calling his name, every inch of her begging for Raleigh to open his eyes.

She fumbles a little, moving her hands to his neck and silently pleading she finds the sign of a beating heart.

Her throat tightens, worry crashing over her as she scrambles for words, voice cracking as Raleigh's still expression faces her. "I can't find his pulse." But she has to, she needs to. Even with her eyes tearing up, even with her heart being torn at right now, ripped from the inside out. "I-" She might hate herself for even saying it. "I don't think he's breathing."

He's not, maybe. She doesn't fucking know. She's crying now, she's pulling him towards her and holding him as close as possible because it hurts. It really, really hurts.

Hurt isn't even capable of capturing the way every part of her drops, down to the ocean floor, shattering.

He can't be gone. Mako doesn't want Raleigh to leave too.

She won't have anything. Never. She'll lose the man she loves.

Then, she hears it. Hears him. His hitched breath, trying to move, trying to get some air. She feels his eyelashes against her chin as Raleigh pulls back, as she pulls back.

He's there, he's here, and he's smiling. Alive.

"-squeezing me too tight." He exhales, then inhales again. "I couldn't breathe."

A wide grin spreads across her face, between all the devastation, relief and high, uncontrolled giddiness lights up in her. Mako even giggles before hugging him.

Raleigh hugs back, they move, and her arms are slung over his shoulders and their foreheads are pressed together and she can't stop smiling.

Even when her face is soar, even when they're asked it they're alright, even when helicopters fly over their heads.

Because even after all of that, she has Raleigh. He's alive and they're both holding each other, and right now it's absolutely everything she needs.

Mako all but drops onto the medical bed, legs aching for a break that she gives with a long sigh, ready for the jaeger program's finest (only) doctors and scientists to crowd around her and Raleigh, who actually is sleeping on an identical bed three feet away from her.

He deserves it, to pass out like there's nothing left to do for the day and finally, it's just time to sleep. His hair peeks out from the dip of the pillow and the arm he's splayed up on the bed, and Mako smiles fondly.

Still in love.

Mako sits silently on the bed, knees hugged close to her chest as Raleigh mumbles about something lowly with the doctor.

His voice soothes her a little, not that she would ever actually admit something like that. But for now she secretly floats, trying not to think to hard about everything, and just listen to words she can't make out.

Of course, she fails, and Pentecost is there again, as she imagines what he looked like in that moment, so steadily stating how she could find him. He sounded so certain, so confident Mako would find him.

She's ashamed in the fact she's been trying not to think about him this whole time. It's not fair to him, it's not right. She has no clue what's wrong with her.

Well, maybe she does a little. She just knows that... that, well, Pentecost is going to be a very challenging topic to process. She knows how much she still wishes he was here, how it's never going to happen.

Mako understands that's going to be something that will weigh her down for a while.

But, for now, she wants to focus on what will be easier, what won't make her relive that moment again.

So, once Mako sees the doctor leave, she smiles at Raleigh. "Good morning, Mr Becket," She says lightly, earning a smile in return as Raleigh moves around to face her. "You fell asleep rather quickly last night."

"What can I say? I was tired."

"Of course." If Mako had switched places that day, she'd still be sleeping right now, absolute exhaustion pinning her to the medical bed after saving the world.

Raleigh scoffs. "And you weren't?"

"Eventually I was," She says with a hum, catching the glint in his eyes from the bright florescent lights and biting her cheek. "I stayed up thinking a little."

Raleigh tilts his head, brows raised slightly, and she attempts to shrug. "You know, about what you are going to tell me because we're back."

She watches as Raleigh pauses, then the memory clicks in as his demeanor shifts, glancing around and huffing out a breathless laugh. "Oh, right." He sounds like he's being lead to the stage where a new shiny guillotine waits for him, ready to drop the blade on him for a crowd. When he notices Mako smiling teasingly at him he throws his arms to the side. "Mako."

"So what is it? Tell me," She urges, crossing her legs and leaning towards him, buzzing with various types of energy. Anxious, excited, what even distinguishes them at this point.

"I just, uh," He starts only to trail off into a quiet glance, then, looks down at the ground and back up, swallowing. "Not sure if this would be the right time."

With this again, Mako frowns. "There's a time for it?"

He almost looks guilty, like he knows her thoughts, like the moment is playing through his head to.

'I never did have very good timing.'

So why is Mako even waiting? If he ends up not choosing the best time for things, she might as well decide for him.

She does, startling Raleigh as she abruptly gets up from her bed and sits down at the edge of his, knees bent and eyes determined.

"Raleigh."

Raleigh blinks at her, throat bobbing, and he seemingly caves at the first try, reaching gingerly for her hand.

"I don't know what this will do, but I know I almost didn't have the chance to tell you anyway," He says, and already Mako's heart swells up in her throat, anticipating any next words with a seized chest. She waits, Raleigh's gaze softens, and it's all lead up to here. "So I'm sorry for not telling you sooner but..."

He huffs, face pink. "I'm pretty sure I love you. I don't- it's okay if you don't feel that way, I just had to-"

"Raleigh," She has to call again, placing a hand on his shoulder. His jaw snaps shut , then he opens it nervously, running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah?" He asks, unsure and it's just like the way Mako was, stumbling over herself to speak with Raleigh, so doubtful that Raleigh would ever feel the same.

But he's said it, confessed it in truth and sitting right here, waiting for rejection. Which won't be the case, because she smiles, laughs, and kisses his forehead.

"I love you too," She whispers, and Raleigh's smile is brighter then anything in the room, his hands at her sides are warm and caring, and his eyes are so perfectly scanning over here, a mumbled request falling from him that she nods instantly to.

So then, the most wonderful thing is Raleigh's lips on hers, shy, gentle, but undeniably curious and eager.

They're kissing, and for a moment she's just with Raleigh and only Raleigh, pulling him close and never wanting to let go.

They end up likd they did on the pod, foreheads pressed together and smiling like idiots.

And maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all, loving Raleigh. Because at least Mako has this, has Raleigh, and Raleigh has him.

It feels nice, great even, to have someone, and Mako thinks she has a fighting chance to push through everything and still stay standing.

So Mako laughs and Raleigh does too.