"Was it really, cousin?" he heard a whisper in his ear.

When he turned his head toward the sound he was greeted with blonde curls, blue eyes and a smile he hadn't seen in years.

"Cissy?"

She giggled.

"No, I'm just borrowing her image."

"You're the first of the three spirits," he said, his eyes widening.

"Right, cousin. I am the Ghost of Christmas Past."

She was younger than she was now. She looked to be fourteeen, and she wore a white frilly nightgown. Her smile was the picture of innocence and joy.

"Christmas Past?"

"I will show you the Christmases that have long since passed," she said. "Hurry up! We don't have much time, cousin. Come! Come!"

He left his bed and took her outstretched hand. She dragged him towards the window and opened it with a wave of her hand. He was at first surprised by her nonverbal spell, but then remembered that she was a spirit and not truly his cousin. He picked his coat and only managed to wrestle it on one arm, before she pulled him out the window.

"Cissy!" he screeched, eyes closed.

"Open your eyes, cousin! Look at London !"

He did as he asked and when he saw London his eyes widened in wonder. They were flying over London, he laughed at the absurdity. If this was because of the little he'd drunk at the pub he'd be going again! He saw the pub down below, and all the beautiful lights of the city. It was almost as beautiful as the night sky. They flew far out of London and over grassy hills.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see, darling!" she giggled out.

After a few moments, he saw it there. The Rosier Manor. It was surrounded with evergreens. It imposed itself over the nature around it.

They landed softly on the steps of the manor. Narcissa took a finger and placed it to her lips with a pretty smile. She opened the door and beckoned Regulus in.

He entered hesitantly, and was instantly hit with noises he hadn't heard in years. He followed the sound of laughter to the living room.

He saw himself running around the tree. He was seven. His cheeks were flushed and his smile was bright. Little Regulus giggled as Narcissa scooped him up.

"You were so cute !" Ghost Narcissa squealed.

Regulus turned to look at her, and Narcissa widened her eyes and smacked him lightly on the shoulder.

"Take the compliment! Merlin. "

Andromeda was sitting on the coach talking with Bellatrix. This Christmas must be before she left. Before anyone left.

"We're in 1969. Andromeda won't be gone until next year."

"Oh."

He looked on at the scene. Andromeda looked happy. He hadn't seen her in so long, he couldn't remember her face. It was strange to see her. They all looked so young and happy, even Bellatrix. That was all before, of course.

"Why are you showing me this? There's no point in seeing this," Regulus mumbled.

"Would you like to see something else?" she asked.

He looked over at Andromeda and Sirius. Sirius was 10. It was the year before he went to Hogwarts, and the year where they'd been the closest, constantly promising not to forget each other and to 'write everyday.' In the memory, Andromeda frowned at something Bellatrix had said, that she was now cackling about. Andromeda left the room quickly, leaving Bellatrix confused, Regulus could faintly hear the 'C'mon, 'Meda!' as she chased after her. Ghost Narcissa took his hand and suddenly the walls of the Manor were turning into the ones of Hogwarts.

Regulus looked around and found his past self sitting alone at the Slytherin table.

"This is the Christmas after Sirius left," he said, restrained.

The Ghost said nothing. None of the other Slytherins had stayed that year, and usually Regulus didn't stay either, but he didn't want to go back to the house yet that year with everything that had happened.

The door to the hall opened and there was no question as to who had entered for they were so noisy. Regulus still had no idea why they had stayed at Hogwarts most Christmases, when he was sure the Potters would've welcomed them all with open arms.

The Gyffindors sat at their table. When this had first occurred, Regulus had avoided looking at the table at all costs, pretending to be interested in his Christmas feast, but now that he couldn't be seen or heard he stared, unabashed. Sirius looked almost like he did in the previous memory-happy and free.

Then Sirius saw young Regulus from across the room and oh -Regulus remembered this memory now.

"I don't want to see this," he whispered, as his brother got up from the Gryffindor table.

"You made this past yourself," the spirit said.

"I want to see something else, please -" he was interrupted by his brother.

"Would you like to sit with us, Reg?"

The young Regulus didn't answer. Sirius sighed and ran a hand through his unkempt hair. Then his face became determined and hard as it often did, and he slammed his hands on the table.

"I know we don't get along, and I know I left without you-I'm not sorry for that. I did the right thing in leaving," he said. There was a pause and then he sighed "I just want you to know that you can always come see me, Reg… There's always room for you to eat with me and my friends."

As Sirius turned to leave, dejected by his brother's lack of response, the younger Regulus looked up at his brother's back and said:

"Like-like I'd ever share a meal with blood-traitors, half-breeds and mud-"

He'd said it quietly, so quietly that anyone would have missed it unless they were trying to hear what he had to say. Sirius turned anger and disappointment clear in every element of his presence.

"Shut it," he said, bitterly. "I know you all have already disowned me, but I disown you . You are no longer my brother. Goodbye, Regulus."

Regulus saw the tears prick up in his younger self's eyes, but what he hadn't been able to see at the time were the tears that pricked up in his brothers'.

"I can't -I can't change anything! Why show me this?! Do you delight in seeing me suffer!" Regulus yelled.

"What would've happened if you had gone with him?" the spirit asked.

"I couldn't leave… I'm the spare. I had to take his place."

The spirit nodded lightly, then looked at him straight on.

"What's stopping you now?"

"This!" he sputtered and raised his sleeve to reveal the mark there, "I-I can't very well go see him now!"

"Didn't he say you were always welcome?" The spirit pointedly did not look at the mark.

"That was before, spirit… Shouldn't you know this?" he said, frustrated.

"Don't you not believe in those things anymore?" she asked, sparing the mark a glance.

"Of course I don't," he let out a puff of air, "but it's pointless to look back at the past…"

"If it's pointless to look back at the past," she said, "then what is really stopping you?"

"You answer, since you seem to so want to tell me!" he replied, snarkily.

She stared at him dead in the eyes, with an expression he'd never seen reflected on the real Narcissa's face and said:

"Pride."