The air outside was positively frigid, her every breath coming out in wispy tendrils of fog that curled past her face in the wake of each step that she took. The skin of her cheeks prickled from the bitter chill, and she tried not to think about the unsightly flush that had undoubtedly broken out across her entire face by now, a splotchy mask of red against her naturally fair complexion. At least out here there was no one around to witness.
Normally on a day like today she'd be barricaded in the warm shelter of her room, cocooned in the soft, cozy embrace of a fleece blanket while she buried herself in an engaging novel and sipped from a thermos of hot cider spiced to perfection. She didn't at all care for the cold. She could do without the aching numbness that gradually crept into her fingertips and toes, the way the icy air burned against her sensitive skin with every sharp gust of wind that cut past. But the three layers she wore beneath her parka were doing their job well enough, and the fur-lined hood ensured that her ears remained comfortably toasty.
Besides, she had no intention of missing out on this beautiful winter wonderland stretched out before her. Because while Sissi Delmas may have hated the cold with an iron vengeance, she absolutely adored fresh snowfall.
Her boots carved shallow trenches through ankle-deep drifts, the snow giving way underfoot with a satisfying crunch. The narrow trail she followed carried her on a meandering path through a stretch of dense woodland, a remote oasis of calm and solitude that was a welcome break from the buzzing hive of activity that was the Kadic Academy campus. The ground here was undisturbed except by the occasional thread of animal footprints that crossed here and there, emerging from the treeline on one side of the path before disappearing back into the depths of the wilderness to parts unseen. All around her was a captivating dreamscape of immaculate white powder canopied by a clear blue sky, the morning sun's rays filtering through the weave of tree branches embowering the trail overhead.
There was something about the sight of fresh snowfall that always brought to Sissi a deep feeling of nostalgia, a longing for simpler times when the world still felt so very new and magic lurked around every corner. There were memories, vivid and flawless, bringer her back to those days in her life when she was very little, to a time when Maman was still committed to the pretense that family was the most important thing in the world to her, a time before Papa had fallen into consuming himself at all hours in his work just to get through his days, a time when she still had her best friend in the whole world, when the two of them would talk and laugh and play together without the faintest care or concern.
A time when she still had Lenore.
On snowy days like today the four of them would venture out together into the freshly remade world to mold and sculpt it in all the ways their imaginations could conjure. They would have snowman building competitions—Lenore and Maman versus herself and Papa, always ending in long and silly debates over whose came out better—or go sledding down the tall hillside just beyond their property until their legs ached from climbing, or spend the day carving an entire coterie of snow angels into the soft powder across their whole backyard, returning indoors dusted head to toe like sugar cookies.
Those days had been filled with laughter and joy, treasured memories that danced before her vision now as she admired the dreamy landscape that surrounded her, drinking in the ethereal calm and indulging in the way the snow glittered like millions of tiny diamonds packed tightly together when it caught the sunlight just right. She thought back on those times in her life fondly still, even while understanding that those precious moments were long gone for her now.
Up ahead the trail ended at the edge of a small clearing, the sight opening up before her as familiar to her as home, her own private sanctuary in a cold, frozen world. She breathed a contented sigh as she emerged into the full, unbroken light of the sun, indulging in the warmth of it against her cold-stung cheeks, and she paused to soak in the welcome heat and to take in the pristine sight around her. The glade was a broad, oval patch of land where the trees here had thinned considerably, giving way to an oasis of open space within the dense woods. Not a single blade of grass or stray stone dared break the uniformity of the snow, leaving the entire area carpeted in a flawless canvas of sparkling white. The trees stood tall and silent all around her, their branches heavy with thick layers of clinging snow and frost. Here and there were steep banks where the snow had been blown into sloping mounds by the wind.
They looked so soft and inviting, those pillowy hillocks. In another life, she would be diving headfirst into one of those snowdrifts, tossing powder high overhead in a crystalline shower that would dazzle her eyes with the spectacle of sunlight breaking into a million fractals of prismatic splendor. She would swim through the icy fluff like a clumsy winter fish, arms and legs thrashing up powder into a miniature flurry until she was completely frosted in shining crystals, clothes, hair, and all.
And Lenore would be right there with her, launching her body into the waiting drift after her like a cannonball, sending up a plume of white to shower back down upon them both, reducing the two of them to fits of endless giggles. They would spend an entire day carving tunnels through those very hillocks of snow, turning them into molehills riddled with child-sized openings, pretending they were digging their way to fairyland.
A wave of sadness sliced through the serenity and nostalgia. Sissi promptly banished the visions from her sight, rooted herself firmly back onto the bedrock of her surroundings, swallowing down the sharp ache budding in her chest. That was the risk that came with remembering, the price that never failed to exert itself upon her if she was so careless as to keep pushing against such fragile boundaries. There was no indulging in those happy moments of her past without the inevitable confrontation of everything that was now missing in the present, that life long lost to her with no hope of ever getting back. It was a dangerous tightrope, filament thin, that could send her teetering off and tumbling back down into that all consuming darkness that only seemed harder and harder to drag herself out of each time she succumbed.
She knew well enough where her own limits lie, and better still not to test them. And so she sought the calm and beauty of her surroundings, using the distraction to her advantage, clasping the many seals back into place with methodical care.
It wasn't hard. She had years to get it perfect.
Her feet carried her forward on a wandering trek that loosely circumnavigated the clearing near its edge. Sissi made a quiet survey of the transformation the previous night's flurry had wrought on her familiar hideout, noting the contrast against her memory of previous visits when the palette of the landscape was dominated by a verdant spread of Spring's lush, thick greenery, or the vivid spectacle of reds, yellows, and oranges of Autumn's eclectic brush. Now, with all that fresh powder covering the ground and crowning the bare trees, the woods looked positively otherworldly, her private glade reminding her of someplace remote and foreign, a land isolated from the outside world in more than just distance.
A perfect place to just linger and admire. A perfect place to lose herself, if just for a little while.
She diverted her path towards the heart of the glade. She considered now the natural features surrounding her, seeking out a good spot where she might sit and bask among the picturesque scenery, at least for as long as her body would tolerate the oppressive chill. The sparse scattering of trees occupying the space offered many enticing prospects. Her needs were simple enough, a soft cushion of snow beneath her, a sturdy frame at her back to lean against. All she really need consider was her preferred view.
There wasn't much thought involved in the task. She let whimsy guide her, taking her time wandering along an aimless course. She'd know what she was looking for when she saw it. She was rounding one of the more compelling prospects when her eyes alighted on something that stopped her short in her tracks. The sight was strikingly out of place, a shape carved out from a piled mound of snow out in the middle distance, distinct and familiar in form. It took only a small effort to resolve the contrast between the bleached glare of the white powder and the conspicuous figure half submerged within it.
A person, lying face up in the deep depression of their own silhouette, splayed out and unnervingly still.
An uneasy foreboding seized her then. The body was far too still, still as the mound of snow piled around it. Suddenly the cold was a very distant thing in her mind as she broke out into a run, a rising panic sending her heart hammering in her chest.
She had heard enough stories of unfortunate victims freezing to death after getting caught out in sub-zero temperatures. They flashed through her mind now in an ugly montage, and Sissi hoped beyond hope that she wasn't running towards a corpse. But when she was close enough to see the person in proper detail her stomach twisted in nauseous fear and a pained gasp rose out of her as recognition struck her. The girl's eyes were closed as if in peaceful sleep, her straight, dark hair splayed across the snow like an inky black halo. Her already pale skin was bleached a ghostly white, her thin lips tinged a frightening shade of blue.
Sissi's breath hitched in her throat as hysteria began to set in.
"Yumi!"
Her voice came out in a panicked squeak, her throat constricting in from the crushing grip of her horror. The splayed form of Yumi Ishiyama was still as death. How long had she been out here like this? What if she was too late to save her. Sissi crashed to her knees at the girl's side and seized her by the shoulders, and she began to shake her wildly, hoping beyond hope Yumi could be roused back to consciousness.
"Yumi! Yumi, wake up!"
She didn't know what she had expected to happen, what the proper reaction a person near death should have had under such extreme circumstances. What she hadn't been prepared for was for the frozen body to spring fully to life without warning, lurching in a shuddering jig, the mouth opening to emit a shrill squawk, the eyes bulging open, large pools of white surrounding black islands of dilated pupil staring straight back into her own. Sissi, for her part, let out a blood-curdling shriek as she flung herself backward and away from the freshly reanimated corpse, collapsing onto her back in a cloud of white powder where she continued to backpedal through the snow in a delirium of fright.
"Sissi?"
The sound of Yumi's voice, clear and lucid, was enough to snap her back to her senses. Sissi immediately stopped her flailing, and in the following interim she simply laid there in the upturned snow and stared, shocked and dumbfounded, at the suddenly revived and clearly perfectly healthy girl who was anything but dead. Her body had yet to catch up with her, her heart still hammering behind her rips, her chest heaving, plumes of hot steam clouding the air in front of her with each sharp exhalation.
Yumi was staring right back at her, her cheeks no longer pale but flushed with the fresh rush of adrenaline that was surely coursing through her now, the blue tinge of her lips replaced with the soft pink that was their typical shade. She was wearing a look of wild shock as if, for all the absurdity of the notion, it was Sissi whose presence was out of place in this remote and isolated wilderness.
A dizzying cocktail of emotions was storming through her now. The lingering traces of terror and grief that still swam through her system now mixed with the fresh surge of shame rushing in to take its place, shame for getting caught up in what had to be some twisted joke at her own expense, one which she had gone and completely fallen prey to like the idiot she was. Then there came the anger, dim at first, and then roaring into a blaze of fury that burned ever hotter until it filled every part of her. She shoved herself to her feet with a new surge of strength and whipped the freezing snow out of her sleeves without noticing the bite of cold from the invading crystals, and aimed a white hot glare on the other girl.
"Just what the hell is wrong with you, Ishiyama? I've had some pretty messed up pranks played on me before, but this is a whole new low, especially coming from you."
"Prank?" Yumi's look darkened, her eyes narrowing, brows bunching together in accusation. "Are you crazy? You're the one who jumped me. I was just lying here minding my own business. How do you figure that even makes sense?"
"Just stop it!" Sissi snarled. She hated that her eyes were stinging. She had to keep blinking repeatedly to keep her vision clear. "This is not funny. I really thought you were dead. Why would you even fake something like that? I don't care what you think of me. You'd have to be the worst kind of person to ever think that was okay."
The animus fled Yumi's features in a rush, and her eyes went wide with sudden understanding.
"Wait, hold on." She raised a hand to signal pause while she worked through some internal calculations, her gaze shrewd and probing as they pierced Sissi's own burning stare with unwavering composure. "You're telling me that you found me lying here...and your first thought without even checking was that I had frozen to death?"
"And just what else am I supposed to think when I see someone lying in the snow, pale as death and not even moving," Sissi shouted. "Why else would you look like that if not because you were trying trick me into thinking you were dead?"
Sissi was sure she had never felt so angry, and it did nothing to help in the least, the way Yumi was suddenly, surely smiling at her. It was tight-lipped at first, as if she were trying to hold it back and failing. Then her lips parted in an eruption of snorting chortles, a breathy fit of laughter that quickly escalated in force and pitch until it hit a crescendo that rang across the glade, echoing back to them off the surrounding trees. Soon the older girl was doubled over, shaking and breathless, her face brightly flushed and her eyes tearing. The sheer intensity of it was jarring, like what Sissi was witnessing was more catharsis than joy.
It was enough of a spectacle to give her pause, and in that pause her sure and righteous anger began to diffuse under a budding confusion, a nagging uncertainty weighed under a sense that she was missing something, or else Yumi had simply departed all notions of sanity and this was the final result. As long as Sissi had known her, the girl had never failed to present herself with an aura of frigid detachment, regarding her at the best of times with a numb indifference that bordered on hostility. Even in the familiar company of her friends, what accounted for joy in the normally stoic girl was debatable at best, a muted smile here, a clipped laugh there, a resting scowl for every other mood. Which was why her present hysterics were so bizarrely out of place.
And here, that compulsive tick reared its head, as it always did in moments like this, distracting her from herself, drawing her full attention to the girl in front of her, demanding that she account for this bizarre inconsistency. If there was one thing Sissi couldn't stand, it was being confused, and right now Yumi was confusing the hell out of her.
"You...you actually thought..." Yumi could barely choke out the words as she finally collapsed onto her back against the snow mound, her whole body shuddering as she gasped for air between choking fits of laughter. "That's...that's why you were screaming like a banshee. Oh god, your face, it all makes sense now."
It took a fair bit more time for her to finally calm back down, her laughter gradually dying down to subdued giggles until she had fully managed to regain her composure. Eventually her body went ceased shaking, her eyes closed once again as she settled back into her previous state of calm. Then her eyes opened again and focused back on Sissi, and a gentler smile graced her lips.
"I'm sorry. I'm not making fun of you, honest. It's just...god, you nearly gave me a heart attack, you know."
"I gave you a heart attack?!" Sissi balled her gloved hands into tight fists with renewed ire. "After what you just put me through you have the nerve to say that?"
"I must have been drifting off or something when you jumped on top of me," Yumi went on. "I had no idea you were even there. I don't think I've ever been frightened so badly my whole life. My body's literally shaking right now. My heart is still trying to burst out of my chest."
It was Sissi's turn to be struck by that jarring shock of abrupt and uncomfortable understanding, and then came hot needles of embarrassment to join the frothing mess of everything else already going on inside of her in that same moment. If Yumi hadn't been lying there in some tasteless attempt to prank her...well, it wasn't hard to imagine the other side of that encounter.
Yumi let out a softer laugh this time, a sound of relief and release, pure and guileless. Her eyes slid closed again, and she spread her arms out just the way she had them before when Sissi first saw her and nestled herself back into her icy furrow. Her body fell still once more, and as the seconds ticked past the only movement was the gentle rise and fall of her chest. Her face was was a mask of blissful calm, like she was just taking a nap.
It was in this interim that Sissi noticed, for the first time, just how underdressed Yumi was for such cold weather. She had apparently ventured out of doors without a coat or even a proper sweater. The thin long-sleeved shirt she presently wore seemed barely suited for mid-autumn, let alone this deep and unforgiving winter chill. And then there was Yumi's complete lack of gloves, a cardinal sin as far as Sissi was concerned. And her bare hands were resting right up against the frozen snow, bone white with cold. Just the sight of it made her own hands itch in sympathy. It was enough that Sissi marched right up beside the older girl, looming over her with hands on her hips and a disapproving scowl on her face.
"You're going to freeze to death, you know."
This prompted Yumi to open her eyes again and regard the girl standing above her with a cryptic expression. Then she promptly closed them once more.
"Yeah, and why do you care?" There was no malice in her tone. If anything, she was being flippant with her.
"I don't!" Sissi straightened and folded her arms across her chest. "But I may as well say something since you clearly don't have the sense to dress yourself properly. What were you even thinking, coming out here dressed like that? Are you trying to get yourself sick or something?"
"I was hot."
If that was supposed to be an answer, Sissi could only take it with an even more urgent sense of concern for Yumi's mental well being. Was she not aware they were in the middle of winter?
"And the snow feels really, really good right now."
This was stupid. Sissi considered turning around and leaving right then and there. If Yumi wanted to spend her day bathing in snow that was her business, and if she turned into an ice statue in the process all the better.
But there was something deeply unsettling about seeing her lying there, still and placid and disturbingly corpse-like. The adrenaline induced flush of color was already draining fast from her features, and Yumi was once again the striking resemblance of one of those vengeful ghosts out of a Japanese horror flick. It was strangely chilling.
"What kind of weirdo rolls around in snow wearing next to nothing, anyway?" Sissi huffed, speaking more to distract herself from the unpleasant imagery than anything else.
"This weirdo," came Yumi's glib reply, and her blanched lips twitched into a smirk even as the rest of her remained perfectly still. "Look, I'm fine, Sissi. You can go back to whatever it was you were doing. I'm not going to let myself turn into a popsicle if that's what you're thinking."
Sissi didn't budge. "How can you even stand that? Just looking at you is giving me hypothermia."
She shivered involuntarily as she imagined herself in Yumi's same position, snow touching her bare neck, her unprotected hands and wrists, the cold creeping through a too-thin layer of clothing.
"I don't know. I just like the way it feels." Yumi answered. Her voice had gone serene as if her bed of snow was actually a bed of clouds. "It's...stimulating."
Sissi simply stared. "You're nuts. You must be out of your mind if you actually enjoy the feeling of freezing your butt off. I wouldn't go outside like that if you paid me to, never mind let snow actually touch my bare skin."
Yumi surprised her with another laugh. When her eyes opened again she regarded Sissi with an uncharacteristic look of fondness.
"Don't knock it 'till you try it."
"I think I'll pass, thank you very much. I like being able to feel all my fingers and toes."
At this Yumi drew in her arms and planted her hands into the snow at her sides, to which Sissi cringed in internal protest as she watched them sink into the icy powder. In one smooth motion she pushed her self into an upright seated position, drawing her knees in close to her chest. Her brow rose in light-hearted accusation.
"If you hate the cold so much then why are you all the way out here talking to me then? I'm sure your room is nice and toasty. Don't you usually hide out there on days like this?"
A spark of surprise that Yumi knew even that small little detail about her personal habits.
"I'm here to make sure you don't freeze to death," Sissi snapped back. "Not that I know why I'm even bothering."
Yumi was smiling again in that infuriating way of hers. "Aww, you came all this way out here just to keep an eye on me? That's surprisingly sweet of you. I'm flattered."
"Of course not!" Sissi scoffed, and she turned away with a show of disgust. "I've got better things to do than babysit the mentally challenged."
"Oh really, like what?" Yumi's eyes flashed with earnest curiosity. Now she rose to her feet, and with her greater height Sissi was now forced to incline her head to maintain eye contact. Those cold-bleached hands disappeared into the hip pockets of Yumi's jeans, and for this Sissi was enormously grateful.
"Like..." She quickly stopped herself. She wasn't seriously going to entertain Yumi with an answer? What business of hers was it anyway why she was out here? She didn't have to explain herself to this girl who had never shown so much as a passing interest in her life since they first met. Sissi let out an exasperated huff instead. "It's not like you would understand anyway."
"Try me." Yumi's features had lost all traces of their earlier mockery as she watched Sissi with what she could only read to be true and genuine interest.
There was no ignoring the spike in her pulse. It was not merely the uncomfortable strangeness of the girl being so uncharacteristically sociable with her, it was the an unexpected impulse, the desire even, to answer her. They had never gotten along before, and there had certainly been nothing in recent events to upset that dynamic. But she seemed genuinely interested in her now. Was it Yumi's sincerity that Sissi found so disarming?
"I love the snow, okay?" She snapped out in a sharp retort. "That's the only reason I'm even out here in this awful cold. I couldn't possibly stay inside on a day like this."
Yumi didn't reply right away. For a stretch of time she stared at Sissi in careful study, her brown eyes flicking about as if taking in every minuscule detail, building a map, to what Sissi could not guess.
"Huh, I never would have pinned you as a nature girl. You're pretty much the last person I'd expect to see all the way out here."
"I could say the same about you," Sissi shot back.
"Well, true, I'm not exactly a nature girl myself. But I wasn't missing out on all this." Yumi spread hands, gesturing to the expansive blanket of white powder underfoot. "I guess you could say, we have something in common when it comes to snow."
Sissi scoffed. "Hardly. You won't catch me literally bathing in it."
"It's your loss, really. But it is beautiful, isn't it?"
"Huh?" She didn't quite follow.
"This..." Yumi gestured all around her, "the trees, these woods, everything."
"Well yeah. It's pretty," she said stiffly. She folded her arms again, wary, guarded.
"Winter has to be my favorite season." Again Yumi's features became serene as she gazed again off into the placid wilderness surrounding them. "Everything looks so clean after it snows, doesn't it? I mean, there's something about it that makes the world seem brand new again. Everything looks magical, kind of like stepping into a fairy tale."
Her eyes were back on Sissi again.
"That's why I came to this spot. It's nice to pretend like no one else in the world exists, even for a little bit."
The stiffness in Sissi's shoulders slackened. Yumi's words resonated within her in a way she didn't expect, reaching into that deep, lonely place that hadn't felt the touch of camaraderie in so long. The two of them really did share the same passion, at least when it came to this, when it came to snow.
Gradually her arms fell to rest at her sides. What tension that still lingered in her appeared only in the small fidgeting of her hands. Her mouth wanted to speak, and yet there no words. Just a feeling, an ache, like there was something she desperately needed right then, if only she could figure out just what it was. For now Yumi was lost in her own private world, silently indulging in the pristine beauty of their surroundings, wearing a tranquil expression wholly untroubled by painful, buried secrets.
Sissi envied her for that.
It was then that she noticed the way Yumi's body was shivering, quite violently in fact, as if it were making a desperate bid for warmth against the frigid air, though the girl seemed completely oblivious to her own affliction. Here she was reminded of the too-thin shirt top Yumi was presently wearing, and she wrinkled her nose in sharp disapproval and planted her hands back on her hips.
"Really, Yumi. Just look at you. You're shaking like crazy. What were you even thinking, going out in this freezing weather dressed like that? Now you're probably going to catch pneumonia and die and your darling Ulrich will be so upset he'll throw himself into the Seine in grief."
Yumi looked down at herself and seemed surprised by the sight of her own trembling limbs. "Oh, wow. Guess I didn't realize how cold my body's gotten? Hold on a sec."
With that, the older girl turned and made her way back to the snowbank she had previously been lying in. Sissi watched as she crouched down beside it, and from a hollow of snow she hadn't noticed before, Yumi extracted a poofy winter coat followed by a pair of colorful wool gloves. She wrapped herself in the cozy-looking coat and fitted the gloves onto her frozen hands as she made her way back to Sissi's side.
"There. Much better." When Yumi caught Sissi's look of surprise she grinned. "You didn't think I actually came all the way out here in just my shirt, did you? Come on, Sissi. I'm not stupid."
Sissi allowed only the tiniest bit of humor to seep into her scowl. "You're still completely insane, you know."
Yumi laughed, and somehow the sound didn't seem so odd this time. "You're not wrong. But I can't help that I love the feel of snow against my skin. It just feels so good to me, honestly can't get enough of it." Her look then became conspiratorial, her smile twisting into something more suggestive. "I would have just taken everything off if I thought I could get away with it."
"Oh god, please don't!" Sissi clutched herself as a cascade of phantom pinpricks crawled across her skin at the thought.
"What? I used to do it all the time when I was little," Yumi said. "My mom even caught me at it once. Let's just say, she wasn't at all happy about it. Not in the least. Never heard her scream that loud in my life. You would think she found me with my head chopped off or something like that. It was actually pretty funny."
"Seriously, how are you even still alive?" Sissi really couldn't comprehend how the girl in front of her had managed to survive childhood when she spent her winters rolling around naked in the snow for fun.
Yumi gave another shrug. "Honestly, the cold really doesn't bothered me. Never has. In fact, I usually get really warm when I bundle up for the outdoors, no matter how cold it gets outside. I guess my body just runs hot. Just wait. In a little bit, I'll get super warm and I'll just want to take all this off again. It's a curse, really. I always wind up getting all sweaty from overheating and if I don't compensate my clothes end up drenched and smelly. I promise, it's not pretty."
"Sounds like a nice problem to have. Want to trade places?" Sissi was monstrously envious. The cold always managed to find her no matter how many layers she wore to protect herself. If she wasn't keeping constantly active out of doors, the chill would inevitably creep its way into her bones, making her feel stiff and numb and absolutely miserable. How nice would it be to be warmed up from the inside instead of always having to barricade herself from the outside with blankets and heaters to cope?
"Do I have to take the attitude too?" Yumi replied with a cheeky smirk.
Sissi furrowed her brow. "Ha-ha. You're such a riot. Surely you've missed your calling as a comedian."
"You really can't stand the cold, can you?" Yumi's expression sobered and she gave Sissi a more sympathetic look.
"No, I can't," she grumbled. "My body simply refuses to hold onto heat. My fingers and toes are already getting numb from just standing here doing nothing. I've got three sweaters on under this and it's barely making a difference."
Seconds passed where Yumi stood before her in quiet study, the gears of thought turning. "Take off your glove," she commanded.
"What! Are you crazy?" Sissi brought her hands to her chest in a defensive reflex. "Do you want me to get frostbite? I just told you I'm freezing right now."
"Trust me. It'll help. I promise."
Sissi didn't see how further exposing herself to the elements was supposed to help, but the assuring look Yumi was giving intrigued her, and she was desperate enough to try anything at this point to return some feeling to her suffering digits.
"Fine," she grumbled, pulling off her left glove and stuffing it in her pocket. The cool air stung her bare skin immediately and she let out a string of silent curses aimed squarely at Yumi and her ridiculous ideas. The older girl stepped towards her, pulling off both of her own gloves and tucking them into her coat pocket. The color in her hands had already returned, and Sissi had the creeping suspicion that the pink skin was anything but cold. Still, when Yumi reached towards her with those hands she found herself holding her breath in nervous anticipation.
And the next thing she knew, her hand was wrapped, top and bottom, in both of Yumi's own. In that instant her touch burned almost as much as the frigid air. Sissi let out a sharp gasp at the sudden sensation of heat, then there was pure pleasure as the warmth poured into her, chasing away the numbness and aching discomfort. At that moment she didn't want Yumi to ever let go.
"Better?" Yumi asked, wearing a smile of self-satisfied pride.
Sissi nodded with a hum of approval, all her attention focused on the glorious warmth. "Wow. You weren't kidding about running hot. Now I'm really jealous. I want this all the time."
"Here." Yumi let go of her hand, to her immediate lament, and proceeded to slip off Sissi's remaining glove and pocket that as well. She then took hold of both her hands and guided them to the back of her neck. She cooed with bliss at first contact. Yumi's skin was fire beneath her frozen palms. It was even warmer than just her hands alone, and Sissi practically melted at the sensation. Yumi pressed both of her own palms against the backs of Sissi's hands in a sandwich of heat that left her purring in delight.
"Mmm..." She moaned. "That feels incredible. How do you keep so amazingly toasty?"
"Well, your hands are absolutely freezing," Yumi remarked with a smile. "It feels good, actually. Like putting ice against my neck."
"Then I guess this works out for both of us. I get toasty hands and you can get off from your cold fetish. Win-win."
Yumi tried valiantly to hold herself together, only to dissolve into a fit of laughter, to which Sissi couldn't help but join in. The two of them spent the next few minutes giggling away like little children. Eventually, they sobered up and Sissi took a moment to simply enjoy the feeling of warmth that now seemed to suffuse through her entire body. It had been so long since she had felt immune to winter's icy grip, and she was reluctant to give it up any time soon. In truth, she wanted more. She wanted to wrap herself in Yumi's abundant warmth. She wanted to bury herself into the other girl's embrace and soak up all her heat until she couldn't stand it any longer.
"You know, I think I know a good way we can warm you up properly," Yumi said with a tone suddenly laced with mystery, her brown eyes flashing mischief.
Sissi felt her heart skip a beat. Their close proximity suddenly seemed far less innocent. Still, she retained her cool. "Oh really? And how's that, exactly?"
Yumi let go of her hands then and took a step back, breaking away from Sissi's touch and stealing away her precious warmth. She knelt down in the snow and Sissi watched in rising alarm as her bare finger sank into the soft powder, hands cupping beneath it to capture a heap of it between them.
She took a preemptive step back. "Yumi Ishiyama, don't you dare!"
Too late.
With a wicked grin, Yumi hurled a perfectly formed snowball straight at Sissi's face. She only turned away just in time for it to smack against the side of her hood, bursting apart into a thousand tiny shards of ice that sprayed across her face, many of the splintered fragments infiltrating the nooks and crannies of her hood to nip at the skin of her neck. She let out a yelp of surprise and brought a hand up to her face to brush away the flakes that were clinging tenaciously to her lashes, only to catch Yumi gathering up yet another handful of snow for a second assault.
Sissi wasn't about to take this lying down. As soon as Yumi let fly her second snowball, she sidestepped it with a deft skill that clearly surprised the older girl, and the snowball sailed past her to land as a dud somewhere off in the distance. In that same instant she ducked low to scoop up ammunition of her own, and this she hurled at Yumi before the girl had any time to react. It was immensely satisfying when her own snowball hit its target dead on, and she let out a victorious laugh as watched her adversary spitting out a mouthful of snow.
Yumi had no idea who she was up against. Now she was about to find out just how bad an idea it was to start a snowball fight with a Delmas.
"You know, I used to make snowmen with my little brother all the time when we were younger."
They were both lying on their backs on the snowy ground, Yumi with her coat spread wide open, Sissi with a more conservative arrangement of having zipped down her collar just enough to bare her neck. Against all odds her body was furnace hot.
"Hiroki would always mess up the shape and I'd get so mad and yell at him for not doing it right. We'd go back and forth until one of us got mad enough to start throwing snowballs. Then we would completely forget about the snowman and start an epic battle." Yumi laughed softly and swung her gaze back to Sissi. "We always had so much fun when it snowed. Our mom would have to come out and literally drag us inside because we would refuse to come in on our own. Even long after the sun went down and it got super cold. We just loved playing in the snow that much."
A miniature Yumi frolicking in the snow was a funny thing to imagine, but also undeniably charming. Sissi found it impossible not to smile at the mental image. She wondered if the two of them would have gotten along at that age, especially when it came to their shared love of snow.
"Mom always made such a big fuss about us spending so much time out in the cold, but I think she secretly liked seeing us having fun together like that," Yumi continued. "She always said those were some of the few times she ever saw the two of us actually getting along. I tend to think she was exaggerating. I'm pretty sure we weren't that bad. I think Hiroki and I get along pretty well, all things considered."
Sissi couldn't help feeling a stab of envy. "You and your brother are close then?"
Yumi's expression shifted, a sober overcast taking hold. "Yeah...I mean...we don't always see eye to eye, but I'd rather have him around than not." The corners of her mouth tipped downwards, and she averted her gaze to the sky overhead. "I think we were a lot closer when we were little. Now he just wants to hang out with his friends most of the time and he pretty much ignores me for the rest of it. I guess I get it. He's older now and wants to do his own thing. I should probably be happy he doesn't lean on me as much anymore, but I kinda miss when he used to come to me for every little thing. It made me feel...well, needed."
Is that what it felt like to be an older sister, being someone that was relied upon for everything from emotional support to supplying answers to all of life's puzzling questions? Sissi wondered if she had been so needy in her youth, if she had always been expecting too much, more than was ever capable of being given. Is that what had broken things in the end?
Sissi didn't realize she had drifted until she caught Yumi's hand passing back and forty in front of her face.
"Hey, earth to Sissi. You okay? I feel like I said something wrong just now."
Sissi averted her gaze, feeling her cheeks warming. So much for keeping her guard up. "No, I'm fine. I was just...lost in thought for a moment."
"Anything you care to share?"
She hesitated. A long moment passed where she only stared at Yumi, trying her best to read her expression for some hint of hidden malice or ill intent. There was simply none to be found, only a genuine look of kindness and that inquisitive glint in her eyes as Yumi watched her with what seemed to be inexhaustible patience. There followed a strange sensation of tumblers clicking into place somewhere deep within her, and she felt something loosen and come undone, bringing to the surface a flood of unexpected emotions. She wasn't sure why she said what came next. Maybe it was the fact that Yumi was being so friendly with her now, or that she had been so candidly sharing bits of her own past, but she was speaking before she could even stop herself.
"I used to have someone like that when I was little, someone I was really close to."
She paused to swallow the unexpected lump that had so aggravatingly decided now to make a home in her throat.
"Her name was Lenore. She was pretty much my best friend in the whole world. We did absolutely everything together, me and her. On snowy days like today, we would spend all our time outside having all kinds of adventures. We would go on arctic expeditions through our neighborhood or build giant snow forts and pretend we were rulers of our own kingdom. We'd race sleds on the hill near our house and get into crazy snowball fights that lasted hours. We also built loads of snowmen together. It's funny, we used to fight a lot over them too."
That was an understatement, of course. She and Lenore were always squabbling over something or other, snowmen or not. Arguing was nearly their principal mode of communication, disagreeing over every little thing just for the sake of being disagreeable. There was never any real anger behind it. It was just another dimension of their relationship that no one else could seem to understand but them. It was just another thing that made them them.
"Sounds like the two of you were really close," Yumi mused. "Did you two know each other from school, or did you grow up in the same neighborhood?"
Again, Sissi hesitated. She had already said more than she ever thought she would dare. Did she dare to take things further?
Did she have the strength not to?
"No...Lenore is my sister."
Yumi's eyebrows shot to the sky, then her body followed as she shoved herself upright and stared down at Sissi from a seated position. "Wait! you have a sister?"
It was impossible to look at her then. Sissi could feel her cheeks burning under Yumi's wide-eyed stare. Of course, what should she have expected? No one at Kadic knew of the existence of the elder daughter of Celine and Jean-Pierre Delmas. She was simply never brought up. It was an unspoken rule kept between she and her father. As far as all her schoolmates and teachers were concerned, she was an only child. They had no reason, no right to know anything more about her personal life, and she had been perfectly happy to let it stay that way.
That is, until now.
Now she had given something away and she couldn't take it back, and to Yumi no less, a girl who was her rival at best, her sworn enemy at worst. It went against her most sacred principle, violated her singular taboo.
Never let your weaknesses show. Keep your scars hidden where no one can see them.
So why give that up now? Why throw all that away for Yumi Ishiyama?
"Yes, I have a sister." The words came of their own accord, and Sissi no longer bothered to try to restrain them. "We just don't talk about her...ever. She left the country, anyway, so it's pretty easy to act like she doesn't exist. I haven't seen or talked to her in years. I don't even know where she lives now or how she's doing or anything at all. Its not like she ever bothers to keep in touch."
I mean, at this point she wants nothing to do with me...and honestly I can't really blame her.
"There's...not anything else to tell, really. It's not really a part of my life I choose to share with anyone. I don't even know why I'm telling you all this."
"Wow...just, wow..." Yumi's astonished expression melted into one of gentle scrutiny and she examined Sissi as if with new eyes. Then her face softened further and she gave a small, compassionate smile. "Will you tell me about her?"
Sissi felt her throat grow tight. This was the closest she'd ever come to talking about this sacred piece of her past with anyone outside of her family. She wasn't expecting the pain to surface so easily in spite of all the locks and barriers she had put into place to keep it at bay. There were the happy memories, yes, but also there were those painful experiences she kept tightly bottled up, traumas of her past that she would much rather forget. And yet, she didn't want to deny Yumi anything. The look on her face was so earnest, so sincere, and Sissi found that she wanted to tell her everything and more. She wanted to pour it all out of her, to finally relieve herself of the burden of keeping it all locked up inside.
She swallowed hard to push down the lump that had formed in her throat, and took another slow breath to steady herself before risking speaking again.
"We were best friends growing up before...before our parents eventually split up and Lenore left with Maman while I stayed with Papa. She's four years older than me, and believe me, she never let me forget it. We're pretty much twins, at least that's what everyone loved to tell us, except she somehow always managed to look ten times prettier than I ever could without even trying. I've always been super jealous of her for that. We were really close growing up, pretty much inseparable. And Len always made sure I knew the proper way to do everything, how to dress, the right way to talk and how to act around people so that all the other kids would like me and want to be my friend. And it always worked too. She was a wizard at making people like her. You'd probably hate her, though. She was a million times more of a diva than I could ever be." She forced out a watery chuckle that sounded a little too much like she was clearing her throat. "Sorry, I'm not really good at talking about this."
"No, it's alright." Yumi's tone was gentle and full of honest sympathy. "You don't have to talk about her if you don't want to. I didn't mean to dredge up bad memories. I'm pretty sure there's a good reason you never bring her up."
"No! I want to tell you about her." Sissi held Yumi's gaze in an earnest plea, abandoning the last threads of restraint on her emotions. "I never get to talk about my sister. Papa always just shuts down whenever I bring her up, and I don't have anyone else I can tell. I'm tired of pretending like she doesn't exist. It's just...it's just really hard, you know?"
There was brief stretch of silence where Yumi simply stared at Sissi, her mind clearly occupied with some internal deliberation. Then she turned her attention to the scenery ahead of her, her gaze going distant.
"You know, my parents used to fight...a lot. They still do, really, but it used to be a whole lot worse. There were times when it got so bad it seemed as if my father would walk out the door at any moment and never come back." Yumi's expression darkened then, a tension winding itself in her shoulders. "What scared me more than anything was the thought that when it finally happened he would decide to take Hiroki with him, and that I would never see him again after that. We used to hide out in my room when Mom and Dad were at their worst. I would hold him tight and tell him everything was going to be alright. I didn't let him go until I was sure the fighting had stopped. Secretly it was to make sure no one could take him away from me. I have no idea what I would have done if it ever happened. Thankfully it never did."
All at once the clouds parted from Yumi's expression and the tension melted from her body. She straightened and turned her gaze back on Sissi, her cheerful disposition having returned.
"What I'm trying to say is I think I can understand how badly it must hurt to lose someone you were so close to. I don't know what I'd do if I ever got separated from Hiroki. He may be a royal pain sometimes, but I love him to death. And if it helps, I won't say anything about what you've shared with me to anybody else. You have my word. But I don't mind being the one you come to when you need to talk about this kind of stuff, whether it's about your sister or anything else, really. I want you to know that I'm here if you need it. I mean that."
Yumi's voice was soft and understanding. The words were a surprising comfort, considering they were coming from her of all people. Sissi smiled in spite of everything. "Thanks, Yumi. That really means a lot."
Yumi returned her smile in kind. "Any time."
A beat of silence passed between the two of them as they looked at one another with silent understanding. It had been such a long time since Sissi had felt connected to someone the way she felt connected to Yumi now. She marveled at the strange camaraderie that seemed to have blossomed out of nowhere between the two of them. It reminded her how much she missed having someone to share secrets with. In another life, the two of them might have been friends.
Really, what was stopping them from being friends now?
"Hey, I have an idea," Yumi said suddenly, her eyes lighting up with a playful glow. "We should build a snowman. Right here, the two of us."
Sissi felt a child-like thrill of possibility shudder through her. She couldn't remember the last time she'd built a snowman. Certainly not in all the years since her sister had vanished from her life. She looked out at the endless blank canvas that was their surroundings as a broad smile stretched across her face. Her mind raced with a thousand ideas of what they could build together. "Yeah. Let's build a snowman."
The two of them wound up spending the rest of the afternoon in that secluded glade. She and Yumi worked tirelessly rolling massive snowballs, helped each other hoist them one on top of the other, until they had assembled an entire crew of snowmen, one for each of their respective friends. They had tried their best to make them look the part, at least that was their intent in the very beginning, and when they realized the both of them were hopelessly talentless at sculpting, they resorted to making them look as ridiculous as possible instead, which provoked a great deal of laughter between them.
It was probably the most fun Sissi had had in ages. She had hardly felt the hours tick by as morning transitioned to afternoon, and the sun cleared its zenith on its steady track across the sky overhead. They had taken turns telling stories about their respective siblings, sharing past childhood shenanigans, juvenile disagreements, and embarrassing moments. She felt closer to Lenore than she had in years. It felt so good to be able to talk about her again, and she felt like Yumi really understood her, that she wasn't just indulging her to be kind or sympathetic.
She hadn't realized how much she needed that until now, someone to talk to and listen to her and share in her grief. It was probably the closest she'd felt to someone since her sister and best friend vanished from her life.
Before either of them knew it, the sky had begun to darken and the bitter cold turned savage in the dying light. The pair of them had long since stopped working on the snow sculptures, instead opting to sit on a fallen log and talk. Now that evening had descended, however, it was time for them to make their way back to civilization.
"We should get going," she said with reluctance, standing up from the log. "...Before we become permanent fixtures in this clearing."
Yumi stood up beside her and brushed the snow off of her rear. "Yeah, this is a bit much, even for me." She paused and seemed to contemplate something for a moment. Then she turned to Sissi with a smile. "This was fun. I mean, I never would have guessed today I'd be spending the day with Sissi Delmas and actually enjoying myself. Kind of wild when you think about it."
"Yeah, I had a really good time," Sissi agreed. "You know, you're not so bad, Yumi Ishiyama. Maybe you're even pretty cool."
"High praise coming from the ice queen herself."
Sissi straightened with pride and beamed. "I'll take it if it means I get to be the queen of something. Sissi the Ice Queen. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" She spread her hands as if presenting her snowy domain.
"An ice queen who can't stand the cold," Yumi reminded her.
"Well, you'll just have to keep me warm then." Sissi grabbed Yumi's hand and began towing her towards the trail leading out of the glade, delighting in the confused look on her face. "Now come on, before we freeze to death."
The humor quickly returned to Yumi's features, and she fell into step beside Sissi, not breaking the link between them. "As you command, your highness."