Bella

"Miss Bella?" Carmen is looking up at me with large eyes.

"Hmm?" We're walking to go get her hair braided while her mom and grandma enjoy breakfast together before their family meets up for a glass bottom boat ride later on.

"I heard my mom tell my dad that my Uncle Edward did something to himself." She's swinging our joined hands between us, and I'm enjoying her company. It makes me wish that my sister Lauren wanted kids.

I'm not thrilled to be talking about Edward, but Carmen wouldn't know that; she's eleven. "What did your uncle do to himself?"

Carmen stops walking, looking up at me. "Daddy said he 'cock-blocked' himself. What does that mean?" Her face is so earnest that it takes everything in me not to choke on my own spit.

"Oh, sweetheart. You uncle just, uh, put his foot in his mouth." When she gives me a confused look, I go ahead and laugh. "It's an expression. He said something stupid, to me, and I called him on it."

"So, he was mean to you, and you told him not to be?"

I laugh again. "Pretty much. I like your family, and I like your Uncle Edward. I want to be friends with all of you, but sometimes, adults don't think all the time before they speak."

Carmen rolls her eyes dramatically. "My mom tells me to think before I speak all the time."

"Well, it's important. But even when you do think, sometimes you still make mistakes. Your uncle and I are new friends, so we don't know each other well; we need time to figure each other out and not make each other mad." I smooth a hand down her hair and smile. "But no matter what, you and I will still be friends."

"Promise?"

"Promise. Wanna get matching braids?" I wink, and she smiles brightly. With that mini crisis averted for the time being, the only thing I can think of now is having to face Edward later on. Because, naturally, I'll be joining the Cullen clan for the afternoon festivities.

I'm sitting on a bench on the stern of the boat, with three-year-old Didi curled up in my lap, sound asleep. She'd been fussing and not listening to her parents, so when I started to feel a little seasick, I took her to sit with me, and the gentle rocking of the waves lulled her to sleep.

I'm focusing on the horizon and rocking her gently when I hear a clear voice next to me.

"Can I join you?" Edward is standing over me, hands in his pockets, looking thoroughly chagrined.

"Well, since you can't walk off the boat in the middle of the ocean, I guess you better." I scoot over a little, but there's more than enough room on this bench seat for the two of us.

"Do you want me to take her? She weighs a ton when she's asleep." Edward offers to take his niece, but I shake my head.

"She's fine. I just got comfortable actually." I sigh and angle toward him, "Look, I'm sorry."

Edward shoots me an even more confused look. "What could you possibly be apologizing for? I was such a dick to you. On your honeymoon, no less."

We share a look and burst out laughing. I try to rein myself in before Didi wakes up. "Maybe I was being a little 'friendly'." I shrug and nudge him with my free elbow. "But I wasn't trying to jump your bones. If you're feeling like I've somehow third-wheeled myself into your family vacation, that might be accurate."

Edward hangs his head, and I wonder if he's going to acknowledge anything I just said. "I think my family has obviously adopted you." He looks up and smiles gently at Didi, lying in my arms. "You're here alone and hurting, it's like … you're like—"

"A wounded animal?"

Edward chuckles. "I wouldn't go that far, but maybe. Look, I'm sorry I got weird and also that I sort of hit on you in a roundabout way. You don't need that right now."

I stick out my free hand. "Friends?"

"Friends. Let me take her; Maria might want to wake her up before she sleeps too long anyway. Go get some water or a snack. You look a little green."

I grimace. "Thanks, buddy."

"No problem, pal." Edward scoops his niece up and walks steadily over to his sister-in-law. I watch him slip Didi into Maria's arms as Jessica comes to sit beside me, offering me a bottle of water.

"So, Carmen told me about your conversation with her earlier," Jess says as I take a swig from the bottle.

"Did she mention how I almost choked when she said your brother 'cock-blocked' himself?" I watch as Jess processes all the information and starts to laugh.

"She did not, but I'll have a word with her about repeating everything she hears." She leans back, surveying her family on the boat. "Are you two good now?"

"Yeah, we're fine. I hate to say this, but I might need to step back a little." I turn to face her, and she nods.

"I thought you might say that. We're a lot; I'm a lot. I—" I cut her off.

"You're great; your entire family is great to just welcome me in, but Edward made a good point just now. I'm here alone, and I'm hurting. I think I might need some time just for me." I sling an arm around her shoulders. "But you are absolutely meeting Lauren and my girls when we all get home."

Jess sighs under my arm. "Okay. I love Maria, I really do, but she's so much younger than me and I don't know—"

"Edward said it was hard for you to keep friends." She eyes me.

"Sometimes. Girls are bitches, Bella."

I laugh. "Yes, we really are. Rose and Alice can be a pain in my ass, but they would do anything for me, and Lauren is a champ." I pull her into a side hug because I want to comfort her, but I also realize that Jess is a true friend. I want nothing more than to see her and spend time with her off this island.

"All right, enough of this sappy shit." She wipes at her eyes quickly. "Do you think we're ever getting off this boat? We've been out here for hours!"

I laugh. "We've been out here for 90 minutes … of a two-hour excursion. I think we're heading back now."

Jess sits with me until we're pulling up to the dock, then she goes to help James wrangle up her kids. Edward helps me off the boat before everyone else and walks with me off the dock because I definitely do not have my sea legs today.

"Thanks. I don't know why I feel so off today." We reach one of the quick-service restaurants, and he runs inside to grab me some juice and crackers. When he comes back out, we sit together for a few minutes.

"Uh, so Jess says you're taking some time for yourself." I nod, and Edward nods in return. "Good for you."

"Thanks. I was only here for three days before I met you, and I leave in five days. I like spending time with your family, but I think it's important for me to be alone a little bit. I'll have to get used to it." I shrug, nibbling on a cracker as Edward nods.

"If you want to talk, here or back home, let me know. It's not the same, but I've been where you are." I smile at him.

"Thanks. I think I'm gonna head up to my room." I stand but find myself too wobbly still.

"I'll walk with you." Edward stands, offering me his hand and grabbing my snacks. We walk in silence back to my room, and when Edward makes sure I'm tucked safely inside, I realize that I don't have that type of safety net anymore.

The idea of a big strong man to take care of me. Garrett is gone and I'm alone. I'll always have Lauren and my friends, but the traditional idea that I had in my head is gone.

I change into some pajamas and climb into bed, propping myself up to watch some hotel TV and get some rest. I'm snuggling down, trying to get comfortable, when I look over and see the juice and crackers Edward bought for me.

"Maybe it's time to buck tradition," I mumble to myself.