AN: This was written and conceptualized around the release of JJK chapter 221 - 222. Events that happened after chapters 221 - 222 are not accounted for.
Trigger Warning: Tragedy, Character Death, Angst
Enjoy!
Just like any other day, his mother would blankly stare at the window. Sometimes she would laugh, sometimes she would be talking as if there were other people in the room when it was just the two of them. With his blue eyes, he would observe his mother…
She would mutter names of people he didn't know. He once asked her who they were… and for the first time in his life, the kind and gentle mother has become a hysterical banshee. Since then, he never asked her about them.
The child longed to see his mother's true smile. He once saw a picture of her mother, taken long before he was born. In the photo, her mother's eyes reflected life, emotions and determination. Now they were completely opposite. Her eyes look dead.
He wondered what happened to his mom. How can a woman with so much vigor in life turn into a lifeless doll?
"Nee.. Aunt Shoko… What happened to Mama?" He asked when she visited. Aside from the people who bring them what they need and cleans up the house, she's the only one who visits them.
"What do you mean, darling?" He showed her the picture he found. Shoko almost burst into tears with what she saw. There were four people in the photo. It was taken when Shoko was still a freshman in high school, that time before hell broke loose.
When did she last see Utahime smile like this? After all the deaths and tragedies they have been through, it was difficult to remember. If not for this photo, Shoko would probably not recall that there was a time where she was truly happy in her life, not simply passing through life, waiting for death to take her.
Shoko stared at the boy again. Somehow she felt bad about wanting death to take her too. If that happens, what would happen to this little boy? She would trust Utahime with her life, but now when she's like this, too broken yet still alive.
She hugged the little boy. If the world had once laid its hope on the person who has blue eyes like this boy, maybe she can hope too, even if for a tiny little bit, that things will get better… eventually…
That night, the little boy was having a hard time falling asleep. He watched his mother if she might wake up anytime upon the lightest movement. As soon as he noticed that she was deep in her sleep and no signs of her having a nightmare, the boy stealthily got up and went outside.
He sat on the engawa and let his little short legs sway back and forth as he watched the moon and the stars. It was such a peaceful, beautiful night.
Until…
A man descended from the sky and greeted him. "Yo!" the man said. This wasn't the first time he encountered his man. From time to time he would pop-up in random places at random times.
Despite meeting several times, the little boy still hasn't figured out if he was a fairy, a ghost, Santa, his guardian angel or an entirely different mythical creature. He was tall, he had white hair and the man's most striking feature was his blue eyes. He would often tease him but at the same time the little boy often caught the tall man staring at him longingly. Nonetheless, the little boy finds his presence comforting and aside from his mom and Aunt Shoko at least he has another 'person' he can talk to.
"Palms up," the tall man said. Oddly enough, the little boy followed his command. A second later, the boy had a full bag of sweets in his hands. The little boy can't contain his smile, he loves sweets. But he rarely has it since his mother doesn't like it when he eats sweets. Aside from this 'man', Aunt Shoko is the only one who gives him some.
"Thank you!" the little boy smiled delightfully.
The length of their encounters were as random as when and where they would meet. Sometimes their encounters would be short, as if the tall man was the wind who just passed by. Sometimes their meetings would be long enough for the tall man to tell stories to the little boy until he falls asleep. There were times when the 'man' would show up whenever the moon was up in the sky, there were also times when seasons would change before he showed up again.
Unfortunately, their engagement this time was cut short when the little boy heard his mother hysterically screaming.
"Megumi!"
His short chubby little legs were already running to his mother before it occurred to him that he should say goodbye to the blue-eyed man. He turned around to wave goodbye and thank him for the sweets but he was mesmerized with the man's melancholic expression.
"Why does he look so sad and in pain?" the child wondered.
"My little boy Megumi! Where are you?!" his mother shouted again, which made the little boy forget what he was thinking and focus on going to his mother as soon as he could. Together with the cold soft breeze that blew, the blue-eyed man disappeared.
Her mother's hair was messy and her eyes were sore from crying when the boy saw his mother. Her facial expression immediately switched from panicking to relief when she saw him.
"Where have you been Megumi?! " she hugged the little boy a bit too tight, frightened that he might go somewhere that he can't go back from. "Please don't ever disappear like that again."
The little boy felt sorry for making her beloved mother like this, but at the same time he found it odd. It felt like his mother wasn't really referring to him but to someone else. He wondered who it might be, and what happened to him that his mother has become like this.
Gojo was flying when he was laughing like an insane person and just like how his emotions crashed, he landed on the roof of an unknown house.
It has been quite a while since he heard her voice and he heard that name. Nonetheless it still shook him to the core.
"She must have truly hated me," Gojo said out loud. "She loved that kid way more than she loved you," a voice in his head said.
He used his forearm to cover his eyes. His whole body was trembling. Memories from that incident were playing in his head again.
Gojo just wants things to be over. He just wants to be with Utahime and their newborn son. But why does it have to be like this?
Why does he have to choose on who will live and who will die? Why does it have to be one's death over the lives of the majority? Why does it have to be Fushiguro Megumi who has to die for everyone else to remain alive?
Satoru loved all his students. But Megumi was more than just a student. To him, Megumi was his son. Why does things have to be this way?
Why does being the strongest mean that he has to make the toughest decisions?
However, no matter how difficult things are, a decision has to be made.
"Hollow Purple," with a heavy heart, Gojo launched his attack. His target, Fushiguro Megumi.
Megumi didn't even bother to defend Satoru's attack, he didn't have the face of a desperate person who didn't want to die. He looked in peace, as if he had completely accepted his fate.
Satoru had always hated this side of Megumi, thinking that death would solve everything. He preferred that for once, Megumi would desperately cling to him, begging to save him because he wanted to live, that he wanted to see what his future looks like outside of the hell they were living in. . The boy was too young to die like this, Megumi deserves -
"Megumi!" Despite all the noise, a scream stopped Satoru's thoughts. He knew that voice very well.
But that shouldn't be possible. He made sure that she and their newborn son were tucked in a safe, tranquil place far from this pandemonium, just like how Shoko advised him.
"Mothers might be the strongest people we know, but they can be vulnerable too, physically, mentally, and emotionally right after they have given birth. Make sure that Utahime is secured from all of this mess when that time comes. Got that, Satoru?"
"Megumi! No!" that voice shouted again, now more distinct. This time, Satoru turned to where the scream came from, the face he saw was all too familiar - Utahime's.
She was the last person Satoru wanted to witness this, because just like him, Utahime considered Megumi as her own son and no mother should ever watch how her son is killed.
He looked at Utahime, at the path where his Hollow Purple is headed, and at the people around them. Just like the loud incomprehensible noise around him, his thoughts were in a mush.
Finally there was silence. When the smoke cleared, there was nothing left. Megumi's existence was wiped out of this world. Everything was finally over. But Satoru's anxiety was far from over.
Satoru walked towards Utahime. She was now sitting on the floor, head down, expression unreadable.
He has daydreamed this scene lots of times, when he and Utahime are finally reunited. She would welcome him with a hug and bask on his scent and wrapped around each other's arms. They would greet each other.
'Tadaima."
"Okaeri."
But reality is far different from what he imagined.
When Utahime looked up, what reflected on her eyes were not the soft loving eyes he had always been looking forward to. She looked at him like someone who look at their son's murderer - with anger, loath and disgust.
It took months before things got sorted out. Satoru has been busy during the clean up. He was dragged here and there asking him to do all sorts of things.
For once he was cooperative since it favored him. The busier he gets, lower the chances of being tempted to see Utahime, and actually follow Shoko's advice.
"Give her time, everything that happened, what she has been through, it's a lot to recover from, especially what she witnessed you do."
He might be away from Utahime and their baby, but he made sure that they were well taken care of and all of their needs are covered - a nice house with a beautiful garden and nice view, housekeepers who would keep the house clean and do all sorts of household chores, and a monthly allowance more than enough to cover whatever the mother and child might need. Afterall that's all he can do given their current situation.
Satoru has yet to hold their son in his arms, he didn't even know what he looked like if not for Shoko sending him pictures whenever she visited them. He would smile whenever he looks at their baby's pictures and notices which feature belongs to which parent . Their baby got his spiky hair, blue eyes and lips. While the baby's long eyelashes, the color of his hair, and shape of his eyes were from Utahime.
One random day, Satoru thought that maybe it's a good time to see Utahime and their baby and teleported to where they are. He smiled at the earthy nature scent that welcomed him and the view of the flowers and plants growing beautifully in the garden. He was proud of himself, he knew Utahime would love this place.
He gripped the ring in his pocket. "You got this Satoru," and went inside.
Strangely, no one welcomed him when he entered the house. "Where is Utahime and the baby?' he wondered. He continued walking around, thinking that eventually he'll bump into someone. He might have been the one who bought the house but he didn't exactly know where things were and which rooms served as what. He just ordered the housekeepers to let Utahime do what she wants with the house.
A door ajar caught his attention. He entered the room and saw a crib. Finally he'll be seeing their baby!
It dawned on him that he is now a father. Seeing their baby in flesh, stirred all sorts of emotions inside - he was happy, proud, overwhelmed, and to be honest a little bit scared.
He knew this child could make him do anything. He'll happily give him the last candy he has, and he's willing to dirty his hands again and kill for this kid if he has to.
The baby smiled at him as if he recognized Satoru as his father. Satoru's hand reached down to this cute little baby who captured his heart. It was such a happy reunion, only Utahime is missing.
"Please… not the child…" Satoru heard someone say. He turned around to see Utahime, by the door, looking at him almost the same way she did after Satoru's battle with Megumi - with anger, loathing, disgust and this time, primarily fear.
"Please, spare my child," Utahime begged again, walking slowly towards the crib. Satoru moved his hand away from the baby.
Utahime knelt down at Satoru's feet, her whole body trembling. "Please… Please… Don't do anything to my baby… I'll… I'll do anything… Please let my child live. Please let Megumi live. " Utahime desperately cried, as she clung to his shins.
Satoru felt something he had been suppressing for so long, snap.
"Utahime, you're not the only one who lost a son here. I lost Megumi too! I lost a son too!" He wanted to shout miserably but looking at how Utahime is right now, he knew doing so would make things between them worse.
He teleported himself out of that place. Since then, Satoru made sure to stay out of Utahime's sight.
"What are you doing here?" Shoko greeted Satoru who randomly showed up at her office in the hospital.
"Cold as always huh, Shoko," Satoru greeted back, while Shoko continued reading some patient's charts.
There was a brief silence between the two of them.
"I visited our baby, and gave him a bag of sweets." Satoru said. "He's growing up so fast. He's more of a boy now than a baby. I wanted to spend more time with him but Utahime was shouting, looking for him."
Shoko knew how badly Satoru wanted to be a father to his child and to be a husband to Utahime. He wanted to be the one who would bring Utahime whatever she craved. He wanted to be the one holding her hair up when she's vomiting because of her morning sickness. He wanted to accompany Utahime in her pregnancy checkups. He wanted her to break his hand and curse him while she's giving birth. He wanted to stay up late too, taking care of their new born baby. He wanted to praise Utahime for being such a good beautiful mom when she feels like she's lacking and ugly. He wanted to be there, witnessing their baby's first steps, and first words. He wanted to compete with Utahime if their baby would say Mama or Papa first.
But with how things are in their little family, it seems like it will never happen.
"What a cruel world we live in," she sighed, closing a patient's chart.
Satoru peered through the window of Shoko's office. He saw a family of three leave the hospital. They look like your typical happy family, which made Satoru drown in a world of what ifs - What if they weren't part of the jujutsu world? What if he wasn't the strongest? What if they were just two ordinary people who fell in love with each other?
Would he and Utahime have their own happy ending?
AN: Hoped you enjoyed my fic! Do you have any line/s that struck or mesmerized you the most? Please feel free to share them!
I'm also on twitter (same username/handle). Follow me so we can fangirl GojoHime together.
