Is It Better To Reign In Hell Than To Serve In Heaven?

by Yuna Yami Mouto

Sometimes, despite all the good they've been to and for him, the ADA is simply not good for Dazai at all, not when the PM used to treat him so differently. Or: the difference between a mafia prince and a detective agency's fool, where the PM somehow seems less toxic than the ADA for our favorite suicide-enthusiast

Is It Better To Reign In Hell Than To Serve In Heaven?

Summary: Sometimes, despite all the good they've been to and for him, the ADA is simply not good for Dazai at all, not when the PM used to treat him so differently. Or: the difference between a mafia prince and a detective agency's fool, where the PM somehow seems less toxic than the ADA for our favorite suicide-enthusiast

Despite how much it might vex certain people - one Mori Ougai in particular - the Armed Detective Agency had been a whole lot of good for one Dazai Osamu. Their light may burn him on a daily basis but Dazai liked the way it burns: it reminds him that being a good man isn't easy and that he has to put more work into it, even if it's just an act. He, after all, knows perfectly well that he'll never actually become the good man Odasaku had wanted him to be, but that's okay.

As long as he can keep his promise to be on the side that saves people and as long as he can help some orphans, Dazai is content.

Besides, the Agency was good in that it made him realize just how fragile life is and how hard it can be to protect it. He's sure Odasaku would be exceptionally pleased to learn Dazai had gone out of his way to learn how best to preserve a life as how he used to only think of the best way to end it.

This, unfortunately, did not extend towards his own life, but oh well, you win some, you lose some, right? His attempts have increased but, thankfully, they weren't the serious attempts he used to make in the past; after all, if he is to keep his promise to his fallen friend, he has to live, at least for a while longer, right?

But really, between Dazai's attempts, no matter how silly and ineffective they were, and his propensity to find trouble due to being far too familiar with what trouble looked and felt like due to his past occupation, the Agency could only attribute his survival in the two years he'd been with them to pure dumb luck because they certainly hadn't done anything to keep him safe or alive.

One of the most dangerous examples was when he'd gone missing for a couple of days when he let Kyouka kidnap him for the Port Mafia and no one tried to investigate his disappearance. Sure, the whole thing had been orchestrated by him personally and he could escape at any point in time, but the Agency hadn't known that, not even Ranpo. After all, at that point in time, they hadn't even known of his former affiliation with the Port Mafia. Ranpo had suspicions, but not even he could deduce that Dazai used to be Mori's most prized Executive and one half of the infamous Soukoku and the President had only known Dazai wasn't just some lowly grunt because he needed to know that there was a possibility that, one day, the Agency might be attacked in an attempt to forcefully take Dazai back.

Dazai remained 'missing' for half a week before he bothered to return and it was no thanks to any of his coworkers. Only Atsushi had even questioned his absence, which sort of warmed Dazai's cold, empty, black heart.

And despite this not quite being the first time his coworkers left him high and dry because they 'trusted his ability to survive like a cockroach', it was still jarring compared to how he was used to such situations being treated. Dazai, at first, figured that was simply protocol, which had also confused him since even the mafia, who had hundreds of men, went out of their way to at least make sure their subordinates didn't betray them, let alone the Agency which had so few members. But he quickly realized usually only he was pushed to the side in such situations. He didn't know what to think about that so he just pushed such pondering aside and instead just did his best to act out living the life of a good man day by day.

Until he got kidnapped, for real this time.

And by a more organized and informed group than Dazai could take on all by himself without dying in the process.

So Dazai did the only thing he could do: he preserved for as long as he needed to in order for the Agency to actually seriously investigate what might have happened to cause such a long absence.

He didn't consider he might receive assistance from a different source.

00000

Akutagawa Ryunosuke was not pleased. The Port Mafia had received news of a new potentially dangerous group in Yokohama and the Boss had decided they should try reaching out to the Agency so they might get ahead of the threat instead of just reacting to whatever bullshit might come their way. He sent out Akutagawa to inform Dazai-san so they might arrange a meeting between the two organizations and potentially have Soukoku work together again, as well as let Shin Soukoku team up, too, to work on their teamwork.

And while Akutagawa is always eager to be around Dazai-san so he can prove his worth and strength to his (former) mentor, he was not looking forward to working with those detectives, especially the Jinko. There was just something about the teen that pissed him off and it no longer even had to do with Dazai-san, which had been a shock and a half. But if Dazai-san and the Boss want him to work with his rival, then so be it; he'll show Dazai-san how much he'd grown on that front, too, and have him be proud of him and praise him!

So it was with newfound determination that he all but marched right into the Agency's office and pretty much ignored everyone and the way they prepared to fight in favor of trying to find that all too distinctive, bandage covered figure. He furrowed his brow when he didn't find Dazai-san in the office, which was kind of weird. He could have sworn the man at least kept up the pretenses of doing work.

"State your business here," snapped him out of his musings when he felt a gun press against his temple and he suddenly felt very ashamed of himself for letting that blond guy sneak up on him like this. Dazai-san, Chuuya-san and Gin would all be very disappointed in him if they were ever to learn of this.

"Where is Dazai-san?" He asked, making sure not to appear antagonistic or violent in any sense. Besides his own desire to see the man, Akutagawa had actually been sent to inform Dazai-san directly, as per the Boss' orders, which was not unusual. Dazai-san had become something of a liaison between the Port Mafia and the Armed Detective Agency in the wake of recent events since he had been the only one who hadn't lost his head over the House of the Rats of Dead and had instead led both groups to a satisfying end as soon as he'd managed to get his hands on a phone and claw his way out of a hospital room. That, and everyone of importance hoped more and more by the day that Dazai-san would return to the Port Mafia in the near future in light of these recent events where the Agency had proven utterly incapable of keeping track of Dazai-san and keeping him protected.

Dazai-san would have never gotten shot if he'd been with his own men, Chuuya-san, Hirotsu-san or Akutagawa.

"Why should we tell you?" The ginger haired teen with the illusionary ability asked with a hostile tone but Akutagawa didn't rise to the bait. He had to show Dazai-san that he was working on his patience and temper!

"The Boss has information for him that I am to relay so they can arrange a meeting between our organizations," he replied, figuring being straightforward would be the easiest and fastest way to get this over with.

"Oh, thank goodness," the Jinko breathed and deflated somewhere in the room. He was beside Kyouka at a set of desks when Akutagawa bothered to seek him out. "But, uh, Dazai-san isn't here right now, Akutagawa."

"I do have eyes, Jinko," he replied, rolling said eyes. "When will he be coming back? I can wait."

The frustrating ideals-obsessed blond that was Chuuya-san's inadequate replacement sighed in what seemed to be irritation before he finally took away his gun and instead massaged his temple as though to ward off a headache. "That bandage-wasting machine hasn't been in to work for three days, so we don't know when he'll actually come back. If you leave us with your number, we can-"

But the mafioso interrupted him before he could get any further than that. "Wait, what do you mean Dazai-san hasn't been in for three days? Is he on a mission or something?" He asked with a frown before moving further into the office space, going towards what he recognized must be Dazai-san's desk. It was more or less organized in the same manner as how his desk had been when he'd been an executive, only with far cheaper materials. The only expensive items on the desk were a fountain pen that seemed to be the style Ozaki-san liked, therefore probably a gift from her for what Dazai-san had done for Kyouka, and the item Akutagawa was looking for.

It was a weird, real onyx statuette of an actual mackerel mid-jump out of the water, only it was hand-wrapped in bandages in specific places. For almost as long as Akutagawa had known Dazai-san, the man had had that statuette on his work desk. The one time it nearly accidentally broke when a drunk subordinate had bumped into his desk while delivering a report, the man had ended up in a hospital for three weeks and needed months of therapy sessions to recover from what the Demon Prodigy had done to him.

It was obviously a gift from Chuuya-san, something the other had given Dazai-san sometime when they were sixteen. It was part of their inside joke. After all, Chuuya-san had a slug key-chain he kept on his person when he knows he doesn't have missions that day.

However, unlike the key-chain, the mackerel statuette had a secondary function besides being a decoration that was part of a gag gift war between two rivals. Based on which direction the statuette is facing, should Dazai-san not be found, it is a message whether he needs backup and how quickly. If he wasn't wrong in his interpretation and if the meaning hadn't changed, then Dazai-san had not intended to go missing.

With panic suddenly coursing through him, he whipped out his phone and immediately dialed Chuuya-san. If anyone would know where Dazai-san is these days, it's the gravity manipulator. When Chuuya-san picked up after three rings, Akutagawa did not wait for any greetings or pleasantries, instead going straight to business. "Chuuya-san, I'm on that assignment the Boss sent me at the Agency, but it seems that Dazai-san has been unaccounted for for three days."

"HAH!? What do you mean that stinky mackerel has been missing for three days?! What the fuck!? Are you even sure he's not just up to his usual tricks? If this is a prank he set you up to, Akutagawa, I will make you practice hand-to-hand with me for a week!" Akutagawa had to lean away from the phone lest he go deaf from Chuuya-san's yelling. When it was safe, he returned his phone to its proper place and replied.

"The fish statue is not indicating that Dazai-san is unaccounted for in accordance to a pre-set plan. And you know I would not joke on this matter, Chuuya-san, and neither would Dazai-san." It was true. Since the first fight against Shibusawa six years ago, when only Chuuya-san had been able to decipher a hidden clue Dazai-san had left in order for Chuuya-san to find him so they could end the Dragon Rush Conflict, Chuuya-san had insisted that Dazai-san must develop a system so Chuuya-san knows when his partner actually needs backup so they would avoid the brief panic of believing Dazai-san was dead in a ditch somewhere.

Of course, when Dazai-san had left, such a system wasn't needed anymore and Akutagawa had always thought it had been Chuuya-san who had gotten rid of the mackerel statuette. It had never occurred to him that Dazai-san might have simply taken it with him. It was quite the pleasant surprise to find it here, but did it even serve the same purpose?

"Wait, that shitty bandage waster actually kept the mackerel?" Chuuya-san asked, sounding appropriately astonished, before he seemed to realize that there were far greater concerns at hand. "Wait, that's not important right now. Shit, so he's really actually missing? And for three days? Didn't those useless detective friends of his look for him?"

"Apparently they haven't even tried."

"... What. The. Fuck?!"

'Yeah, my thoughts exactly,' Akutagawa thought to himself. "What should we do, Chuuya-san? Three days unannounced is too much, already. I don't think we should wait any longer."

"No, you're right. But let's just cover our bases first. Call Hirotsu-san. He and Dazai have been talking recently. I'll call the Boss and inform him and I'll also contact Doc Glasses to see if maybe they are scheming something together. And if not, we might need the Division's support to scour Yokohama without facing repercussions."

"Yes, Chuuya-san."

"I don't know whether you should go check that dorm he lives in for clues just yet, but stay with the Agency. Try to find out anything you can from them, if the fuckers even know how to wipe their asses without Dazai there to hold their hand through these kinds of situations. We'll keep in touch. Notify me the second you find something out."

"Of course, Chuuya-san."

With that, they both hung up and Akutagawa immediately took a seat in front of Dazai-san's laptop. Powering it on, he could already tell that there was no way Dazai-san kept any useful or confidential information on this computer. There was only one profile on the computer and the username and password were printed out and taped down to the desk, meaning literally anyone could access it whenever. Still, to be thorough because Dazai-san and Chuuya-san both would be disappointed he hadn't checked, he combed through the files Dazai-san kept on there, just in case, but it was all Agency missions and cases and half-assed reports that Dazai-san had clearly not bothered to put much effort into. Curious, Akutagawa found the instances the Agency had interacted with the Mafia, including the time they had kidnapped Dazai-san, only to find the basest report of how Dazai-san had been missing and had returned on his own several days later. The report wasn't even written by Dazai-san, but rather the Jinko. It seems that, as if by habit, Dazai-san was keeping the Mafia's secrets, as no names or places were mentioned. It made Akutagawa feel a strange but special kind of way that was really weird but reminded him of the warmth whenever Dazai-san praised him or acknowledged him.

Now even more determined to find the man, he turned a serious scowl towards the Agency members that were supposed to be Dazai-san's coworkers but clearly didn't know how to properly appreciate having someone like Dazai-san on their side. "When was the last time any of you losers saw Dazai-san and did he say anything out of the ordinary?"

"Excuse me?" The doctor asked back in a clearly offended manner, but Akutagawa couldn't care less.

"Dazai-san is missing. None of you did anything about this for three days. That is unacceptable, therefore if this is indeed a serious case, the Port Mafia is taking over since you lot are so incompetent. Therefore, I want you to tell me whether Dazai-san was acting in any particular way that is out of the ordinary for the him you are used to. I will not repeat myself again."

"And why should we tell you anything?" The ginger illusionist asked with an attempt to appear threatening. Too bad for him Akutagawa was trained by Dazai-san and was exposed to far worse intimidation tactics just when Dazai-san was displeased his bandages got wet.

"Your doctor is right there; I could just start chopping you all up until you talk," he replied casually, his Ability activating and threateningly hovering beside him in a proper way to intimidate someone.

"Dazai-san didn't say anything strange nor was he acting differently when he left work three days ago," the Jinko quickly cut in before there could be an unnecessary bloodbath. Out of everyone present, only he seemed worried for the brunet, too, thus Akutagawa actually found him the most reasonable and tolerable person in this room at the moment.

"I don't see why you're making such a big deal out of it," the man claiming to be the world's greatest detective commented around a snack he was munching on. "Dazai disappears off of the face of the earth all the time and it's always utterly random, but he always comes back and everything goes on as if nothing had happened at all. Even Kunikida made space in his schedule for such instances." The blond nodded at that, making Akutagawa scowl. "Therefore you're just blowing things out of proportion, Dazai-fanboy."

Akutagawa stared at these people as though they've gone insane as they all more or less nodded in support of what Ranpo had said. Dazai-san was surrounded by idiots. By the most ignorant fools Akutagawa Ryuunosuke had ever met.

Deciding he'd wasted too much time on this utterly useless exchange, he ignored the detectives in favor of calling Hirotsu-san. The man picked up after two rings and just like with Chuuya-san, Akutagawa didn't bother with pleasantries and instead got straight to the point.

"I'm afraid I haven't heard from Dazai-san since four days ago, Akutagawa-kun," the old mafioso replied with a terse, displeased voice that couldn't quite hide his worry. To be expected: if there was anything or anyone that could take down Dazai-san, Yokohama was once again facing a very dangerous threat. And not only that; Akutagawa had seen the way his (former) mentor and the tactical leader of the Black Lizards interacted. Only the blind wouldn't see that the man was fond of the former Executive similarly to how a grandfather might be of their grandchild. "Have any orders been issued?"

"Not yet. Chuuya-san has to contact the traitor-spy and the Boss."

"It won't be long now, then."

"Yes, I agree."

With that, they ended the call, only for Chuuya-san to call him back the next second. He answered immediately.

"Doc Glasses doesn't know anything and Dazai hasn't contacted the Boss, either. Warn the Agency that we're on our way. The Boss himself is coming." With that, Chuuya-san hung up and Akutagawa just put his phone back in his pocket, facing the Agency.

"Several Port Mafia members, including Chuuya-san and the Boss, will be arriving shortly to investigate Dazai-san's disappearance. A word of ... friendly advice." He said with a grimace. "Don't interfere."

The goody-goodies, of course, protested this, but Akutagawa just ignored them and waited for his superiors to arrive, no doubt with a whole team of bodyguards as well as Mafia members specialized in these kinds of cases. He wondered how many of them would be Dazai-san's old subordinates. Honestly, out of everyone, they were the ones most likely to be of any use in finding their old boss.

Not five minutes later, while Akutagawa was fighting the urge to just kill Dazai-san's new partner who kept screaming nonsense at him, the doors to the Agency's office burst down, flying right off its hinges, as Chuuya-san led the march into the room with purposeful steps, zeroing in on Dazai-san's desk where Akutagawa still was, those blue eyes finding the mackerel statuette and frowning. Seems Akutagawa had interpreted the signs correctly. Behind Chuuya-san was the Boss, as well as Ozaki-san and Hirotsu-san. Some of the men in the entourage were, indeed, from Dazai-san's old squad.

As always, when it comes to Dazai-san, the Port Mafia pulled no punches.

00000

Mori Ougai was extremely displeased when he got the news his former protege was missing.

He'd been in the middle of trying to convince Elise-chan to try on a new dress he'd bought for her, a really cute sky-blue one, when he received the call from Chuuya-kun, utterly ruining his day.

Now, Dazai-kun disappearing without leaving a notice or something was not too unusual. However, it was extremely unusual for it to last three days. For anything exceeding a 48 hour estimate, Dazai-kun left a signal to let people know whether he simply needed space or if he was out there doing something dangerous or stupid. He'd started doing it mostly because of how worried and mother-henning Chuuya-kun became but it developed into a habit he wouldn't break even if he had a concussion, was high as a kite, sleep deprived and drunk all at once. Finding out his old medium for such messages still existed implied Dazai-kun still did it, more or less subconsciously.

Learning that, despite the recent events where Dazai-kun had been kidnapped by the Mafia, supposedly teamed up with the enemy only to end up stabbed and poisoned or got shot by a sniper hired by Dostoevsky, no one had done anything about Dazai-kun's absence until Akutagawa-kun discovered it had Mori out of his office in less than a minute and marching towards the Agency with Chuuya-kun, only to be joined in the lobby by Hirotsu-san and an entourage of men who had once served under Dazai-kun. They were, of course, handpicked by Dazai-kun and thus some of the best the Mafia had to offer; they would be quite useful. Ozaki-kun waited for them by the cars.

They broke quite a few laws in their haste.

Every second mattered now.

It's not that he doubted Dazai-kun's ability to stay alive when captured by an enemy, but to capture the man unawares either makes them incredibly, stupidly lucky or dangerously skilled and competent. If the latter was the case, Dazai-kun could be in terrible shape after three days. He wouldn't have spilled any secrets, of course, but not everyone can interrogate successfully with words alone like he can; Dazai-kun is bound to be quite beat up.

Just the thought of it sent both chilling and boiling rage through his veins.

He and his former protege had a very complicated relationship, true, but Mori had never taken any special delight or pleasure from seeing the brunet in a bad shape. For all his depravities, Mori had become a doctor to help people. He may have strayed quite a bit from those first noble notions from his youth and he'd broken his oath more than once and will no doubt do it again and again in the future, but that didn't mean a part of him that was still a doctor didn't exist. And the doctor part had often reared its ugly head when around the suicidal child he'd taken in as an accomplice and apprentice all those years ago. Mori had saved Dazai-kun from the brink of death, be it from battle wounds or ones he'd inflicted upon himself, more than anyone else, even Chuuya-kun. And for all their falling out had been a disaster, it was far from the worst that either of them could do.

To this day, Mori had a special place in his cold, twisted heart for Dazai Osamu and he knows that he, too, is still, in some way, important to Dazai-kun, even if it's only as reassurance of the safety of the rest of his loved ones that he left behind in the darkness. The chances of them reconciling are minimally low, but never zero. Dazai-kun will, very likely, never forgive him for sacrificing Oda Sakunosuke for the Permit and Mori will probably never feel a 100% safe around the only man who could slit his throat without Mori first being aware of it coming, but there was still a chance they could, at the very least, work together towards keeping Yokohama and all of its citizens safe again.

And in order for that to happen, Mori had to make sure Dazai-kun came back alive and whole.

Otherwise, there was no telling what Chuuya-kun, Akutagawa-kun or even Q would do when seeking revenge.

Besides, Elise-chan had always been strangely fond of the little Ability user who could make her disappear with a single touch. Mori wasn't exactly sure what that meant for himself, but he knew the manifestation of his Ability, at the very least, would throw a fit if Dazai-kun gets taken from them in such a manner. She'd been plenty angry when he all but chased Dazai-kun out of Port Mafia the first time around.

When they finally reached the Armed Detective Agency's office building, Chuuya-kun was the first out of the car and already marching up the stairs. Mori followed hot on his heels, Kouyou-kun and Hirotsu-san flanking him as their men formed a perimeter around the street or followed them into the building. Two thirds of the men going in with them used to work under Dazai-kun; it was a good decision to take them with them. If there was anyone out there capable of working under impossible conditions to reach peak performance in perfect time, it was the people Dazai-kun had trained to meet his expectations and standards.

Chuuya-kun made his signature entrance by all but kicking the door down and marching over to what must have been Dazai-kun's desk, where Akutagawa-kun seems to be going through his (former) mentor's work in search for possible clues. It was a good move to make; whether Dazai-kun had been actively investigating whoever had taken him - as was most probably the case - didn't really matter, as if there was anyone who would know about new gang movements or the rise of an organization in Yokohama, Dazai-kun would have definitely been the first to notice it and investigate the commotion. The Demon Prodigy had once been the heart of Port Mafia's intel, be it gathering or safekeeping. No one had known more of their or anyone else's secrets than Dazai-kun.

Knowledge was power and Dazai-kun had always been very good at wielding it.

"It definitely wasn't a planned leave of absence, Boss," confirmed Chuuya-kun seconds after inspecting Dazai-kun's desk. He moved to the drawers and flung them open, quickly taking out the false bottom and walls to check through Dazai-kun's hidden files for clues.

"Akutagawa-kun, status report, please."

The twenty year old nodded, coughed, before he summarized everything that had happened so far. Mori's eyes took on a rather steely, cold edge when he heard that the Agency had done nothing about not only this disappearance, but almost all previous ones, too. And they seemed to not be taking Dazai-kun's suicidal tendencies nearly as seriously as they should. Even if it was all a joke, which it wasn't, they shouldn't be taking it so lightly. The only one who seems to be still showing any concern for Dazai-kun's well-being in this office was the weretiger. Mori will have to issue orders for his subordinates to go a bit easier on the teen from now on when their organizations inevitably clash again.

"Boss, it seems that there's been rumors of a new group coming into Yokohama," Chuuya-kun called out, extending a hand that held some files written in Dazai-kun's secretly incredibly neat handwriting and the shorthand he usually used during the research phase of his plans and schemes. "They arrived this week and haven't made any moves yet. This could very well be the first thing they've done in Yokohama since arrival."

"Are you suggesting that the lad was their primary or only target?" Kouyou-kun questioned, finally turning away from glaring the Agency into submission so that the mafioso may do their work in peace. "If that is the case, then they are either incredibly foolish to target him without getting a good enough foothold in Yokohama's underworld or they're incredibly smart and well informed if they knew he still pulls a lot of strings and can get any information he wants so they made sure he can't recognize a pattern in their MO."

"But who would want to take that stupid Dazai out that desperately?" Dazai-kun's new partner asked, apparently now more interested in the investigation going on than trying to kick them out.

Hirotsu-san sent him a deadpanned raised eyebrow. "Do you want that list in an alphabetical or chronological order?"

"What," a new, very familiar voice cut through the commotion just then and Mori immediately turned towards it with an 'innocent, friendly' smile that hid none of his blood-lust currently simmering just beneath his skin. "Is going on here?" Fukuzawa-dono had his eyes trained on Mori as he asked but he'd definitely checked the state of his employees already and found them unharmed or else the katana would already be flashing and slicing.

"I see you guys still work quickly when Dazai-kun is involved," Sakaguchi Ango, who was behind the swordsman, commented, fixing his glasses. "I have footage of the incident," he explained before anyone could ask about his presence, showing a disk as he stepped around the President. "Dazai-kun was kidnapped from Oda's grave-site in the late afternoon, four days ago. We were lucky the church and the gates have security cameras and that the graveyard is on that cliff, so it has only one entrance slash exit, otherwise we wouldn't have any clues at all."

"Wait, so that idiot was actually kidnapped?" Yosano-kun asked and Mori tsked at his former subordinate.

"As incredibly unlikely as it seems," he said faux conversationally. "One out of twenty kidnappings is a genuine situation and sometimes Dazai-kun needs help getting out." Even when he really did get kidnapped, Dazai-kun would be able to come back on his own three out of five times without any assistance whatsoever.

The boy was an expert torturer, so he knew how to manipulate his own torturers into doing him the least damage. He had an incredible pain tolerance, so even if he's hurting all over, he can make it out of a situation and to an extraction point where backup could come for him even with broken bones. No lock on this earth, no matter how old or new, seemed capable of keeping him in/out or trapped. It's almost impossible to get him drunk, his tolerance for drugs and poisons is also very high and even if he were to become delirious, he was still incredibly, sharply in control of his inhibitions and his body. He was also incredibly agile with his hands so no weaponry is safe from his sticky fingers and Mori and Chuuya had both made sure he was more than proficient with knives and guns so he can defend himself when his partner isn't there or in the state to do so.

What's more, Dazai-kun had always been an insomniac and he didn't feel hunger until he hadn't eaten for at least three days, so depriving him of his basic needs won't make him crack, either. Mori had only added to his resilience to harsh conditions by making him live in a shipping container for nearly two years until Chuuya-kun found out and made a fuss about it after he discovered no one had been there to so much as slow Verlaine down during that unfortunate time. Waterboarding also wasn't a torture method that would work on Dazai-kun, given he seems rather fond of taking dips into rivers in hopes of drowning.

All in all, Dazai-kun usually had every skill he may need to escape on his own should he get kidnapped, but the Port Mafia still had to face the few situations where he needed them to come for him when it wasn't actually a part of his plan. Dazai-kun had become more careful of it during his last year with them after an incident where Chuuya-kun activated Corruption during a retrieval mission because Dazai-kun had flat-lined and Mori was having a hard time bringing him back with only basic medical tools but they were pinned down by the enemy. Chuuya-kun had nearly sustained permanent damage to his internal organs by the time that Mori had, by some miracle, stabilized Dazai-kun enough for him to wobble over to Chuuya-kun and stop Corruption. Both boys had spent nearly a month in the hospital after that.

Dazai-kun had actually started moving around with a constant contingent of bodyguards after that, if only to ease Chuuya-kun's mind so he can go on that overseas mission he was on during the Mimic incident.

After he defected, he must have laid low so he had clearly been safe.

After he joined the Agency, there was no guarantee of that anymore.

And, naturally, he no longer had bodyguards, either.

Thus, this situation.

"I must say I am quite disappointed, however, Fukuzawa-dono," he told his old partner slash bodyguard. The silver haired man's eyes narrowed quite dangerously, but Mori was not deterred. "Does your Ability not imply not only better control of all your subordinate's Abilities, but also a must to reassure their safety? Yet, as far as I know, you lot have managed to lose Dazai-kun at least three times before this incident just this half a year alone, during two of which times Dazai-kun was nearly fatally wounded. Does your sense of duty cover everyone besides Dazai-kun, just because No Longer Human stops All Men Are Equal from affecting him?"

Fukuzawa-dono narrowed his eyes at his employees, especially the green-eyed detective. "Why wasn't I informed that Dazai is missing?"

"He goes missing every once in a while so we don't really pay any heed to it anymore, Shachou," the black haired man replied casually. Chuuya-kun snarled at that but didn't say anything when Mori gestured for him to keep the peace. They didn't have time for this right now.

Gin-kun and Tachihara-kun chose that moment to enter the premises, followed by more of Dazai-kun's old squad. "Boss, there is no sign of breaking and entering in the dorm room. We swept the whole place for bugs and surveillance, but we found none. There also seems to be no ransom letter of any kind. Gin also said that things seem to be right where they should be, whatever that means. Also, does this guy eat anything other than canned crab? There had to be at least a dozen cans in the trash bin."

The other ginger mafioso present stilled. "Which brand?"

Tachihara frowned, obviously flabbergasted by the question. Mori would have been, too, if he wasn't used to Soukoku's uncanny understanding of each other where the smallest detail could be a Mount Everest-sized clue. "I don't know. It was in a red package?"

"It was orange, the one that was on sale last week, Chuuya-san," Gin-kun surprised them all by talking and, if possible, Chuuya-kun looked even more tense. He let out a string of curses that had the Agency members covering their youngsters' ears.

"Damn it, that shitty mackerel hasn't been sleeping for days, then," the fedora wearing man said, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "And now with three days of possibly being exposed to torture or even more physiological torture, we'll need to get that idiot to a hospital and actually make him stay there."

"We've prepared an IV drip and other medical necessities, Nakahara-san," one of Dazai-kun's former subordinates, one of the only five women he deemed capable and competent enough that Kouyou hadn't taken into her division yet when he'd been recruiting, promptly said.

"As expected of Dazai-kun's squad," Mori semi-praised before turning to the other subordinates. "Have you finished the sweep of the office?"

"Yes, Boss," the three in charge of said sweep said in unison. "Five out of six recording and surveillance devices we've discovered are Dazai-san's. The sixth, however, seems to have been placed more recently. Of course, all signals were jammed the moment we arrived in front of the building. We'll need half an hour at most to track down the source where the signal is going."

"Well, don't let us slow you down. Get to it."

"Yes, Boss!"

"In the meantime, we should assess the scene of the crime, no?" He turned towards the person who knew Dazai-kun the best. "Chuuya-kun, I trust you can spot any clues Dazai-kun might have left behind?"

"Of course, Boss."

"Good. Take whoever you want with you and report to me in an hour at the latest."

"Understood." With that, the redhead casually blasted out of a window, letting glass shatter and rain down onto the streets below. A moment later, they could all hear two cars speeding away, no doubt consisting of men Chuuya-kun had handpicked to help him investigate the place of his (former but not really) partner's abduction. Mori wondered how many of the subordinates chosen had been Dazai-kun's men.

It had truly been a tragedy when, after Dazai-kun left, his squad collectively requested to be put on office duty. Mori had not granted it at first, because this was an elite squad consisting of highly skilled and competent men and women even before they were thoroughly trained by Dazai-kun to meet his near impossible standards, but after he realized just how used the little battalion was of having every single move controlled and predicted by Dazai-kun that they can't work with any other commander, he granted it. Don't get him wrong, each and every single one of them was still perfectly capable of functioning on their own, but Dazai-kun had conditioned them into both a pack and a hive mentality where Dazai-kun was at the top of the hierarchy and his word was more than law, it was gospel. To go from that to any other form of command would have been hard enough, without the difference of Dazai-kun's way of doing things compared to everyone else's added into the mix. Mori wasn't even surprised that only Chuuya-kun and Hirotsu-san could get even vaguely similar results with this squad, given they were the only ones likely to know how Dazai-kun worked behind the scenes, too. It had still not been enough and thus, Port Mafia's elite squad had been all but benched until this day.

They will be of extreme use in this case, especially. It is their former leader they are retrieving, after all, and they had all been both enraged at hearing that he might have been kidnapped and elated to get back in the field for him again, even if it was only for one or two days, however long this search may last. Theirs was a special kind of loyalty, indeed, that would have really been worrisome if Dazai-kun had ever wished true harm upon the Port Mafia.

The Port Mafia men soon dispersed except for Mori's bodyguards as he gave the appropriate orders. As he was about to head out, too, to help with the search, Fukuzawa-dono boldly grabbed a hold of his elbow, stopping him in place. The former partners clashed gazes, but the samurai, for once, did not seem interested in showing hostility or truly clashing. "Let us help find Dazai, Mori-sensei. He is our member and we are allies; surely we can work together towards a cause both sides care so deeply for. Besides, with Ranpo's Ability, it will take no time at all to figure out what happened and where he might be."

Mori couldn't help but sneer. "Forgive me for not wanting to rely on your subordinate's nonexistent Ability for something of this importance, Fukuzawa-dono, for I do actually put great value in Dazai-kun's continued existence and survival. Your Agency had a chance to notice something wasn't right and act on it and instead, you only bother to worry three days too late. Had this happened under our watch, Dazai-kun would already be at Chuuya-kun's apartment complaining about having to eat vegetables as well as crab in his meal, whatever wounds he may have gained properly treated and on the way to get some proper sleep. Or maybe it wouldn't have happened at all; Dazai-kun's men are very competent and very protective of their Executive. But let us not focus on the 'what if's. Instead, hear me loud and clear now, for I will not find a need to repeat myself again at a later date: we are more than adept at finding Dazai-kun when he might be in danger. We do not need your incompetent 'help' slowing us down or jeopardising the rescue mission. Now, have a good day, Fukuzawa-dono, and pray to whatever higher power you may believe in that Dazai-kun returns through these doors at all; after all, we in the Mafia will make sure to make quite the enticing offer to have him back home."

He ignores whatever indignant protests his statement causes and instead marches on with Kouyou back to the waiting cars. Chuuya-kun should be reporting in soon; he's far more intelligent than most people give him credit for, after all. It's hard to appear smart beside someone like Dazai-kun, but that does not mean the redhead is stupid by any means. That and Chuuya-kun has that infamous Soukoku-sense; if anyone can sniff out any clue Dazai-kun might have left behind to help aid his own rescue, it will be none other than Chuuya-kun who will spot it first.

Unfortunately, for now, this is a waiting game, but in the meantime, Mori will prepare for his own expertise to be utilized.

He hadn't been the best underworld doctor for nothing, after all.

00000

Nakajima Atsushi is overall the one who was the most uneasy about the whole thing currently happening.

Dazai-san, his mentor, the man who saved him, gave him a home and a job, was missing and everyone else had treated it as a joke and Atsushi could have done little more than questioning the likeliness of the man's safety being endangered. It wouldn't have been the first time, but it also wouldn't have been the first time the brunet just disappeared out of nowhere only to come back when he felt like it.

It was a delicate balance of worrying and not raising any false alarms and he was still only just learning.

He figured his seniors knew Dazai-san better so he more or less followed their lead.

Until Akutagawa showed up and all but panicked at the news. Then the Port Mafia and their Boss came, too, and the Agency got a chewing out of the century. And then they stored off, leaving as though they hadn't even been there, off to find Dazai-san without a single glance back at the detectives who should have been the most capable of doing that work.

Sakaguchi Ango sighed even as he handed over a copy of the footage he'd mentioned to Ranpo-san, which the other all but snatched out of his hand with an indignant fury one did not often see on the man. The last time he seemed this angry, the President was nearly dying due to the cannibalism Ability. "You shouldn't feel disheartened for not understanding Dazai-kun. The number of people who get to see even a single crack or layer of his masks can be counted on both hands and still have free fingers remaining. And those who truly understand him can be counted on one hand and still nearly form a proper fist from it."

"He's our colleague," argued Yosano-sensei immediately, looking extremely pissed that they all got shown up by the Port Mafia Boss.

"And Dazai-kun was my friend," the bespectacled government agent shot back. "But I still couldn't understand him. Not like Odasaku-san could and most definitely not the way Chuuya-kun or, heavens forbid, Mori-dono still do. Dazai-kun simply doesn't allow it. And if Dazai-kun doesn't want someone to know something about him, well, I think only Dostoevsky could figure it out on his own despite Dazai-kun's wishes, though it definitely wouldn't be easy and would take quite some time even for him."

"Uh, bitch, what am I? A roach?" Demanded a huffy Ranpo-san but if Atsushi thought about it, he realized that Ango-san was right; not even Ranpo-san had known Dazai-san's exact past occupation, not even the President had known. They were only informed/able to deduce that he was not a mere foot soldier for the Port Mafia, but none of them would have ever guessed something as high ranking as an Executive.

Atsushi himself had only started to wonder at his mentor's former occupation in earnest when he realized Akutagawa showed more respect towards Dazai-san than he did pretty much anyone else, including the Boss himself. Now, seeing how the Mafia as a whole had reacted, he was starting to see just how important of a role Dazai-san had held in their enemy's(?) organization.

Ango-san did not bother to reply to Ranpo-san's honestly bratty attitude. "The Port Mafia is more than capable of tracking down Dazai-kun, as they've had years of experience with it and Chuuya-kun is basically a bloodhound for Dazai-kun; it's basically a Soukoku thing. However, as much faith as I have in the Port Mafia delivering Dazai-kun back safe and sound, I'd still prefer it if the Agency also had at least a bit of a hand in bringing him back, at least enough to monitor the Mafia and enough to make sure the government doesn't get involved."

"Why would the government want or need to get involved?" Kunikida-san asked and the other bespectacled man sighed, massaging his temples.

"Because Dazai-kun has enough information and blackmail to make the government crash and burn and should that information fall into the wrong hands, well, let's just say that Dazai-kun wouldn't even bother trying to stop it and the government is aware of this, thus always keeping an eye on him."

"Dazai-san isn't like that, though," countered Kenji and Atsushi and Kyouka had to agree. Dazai-san may have had a bad past, but he's clearly a changed person! He wouldn't want to cause something as catastrophic for the whole country as taking down the government if he could help it! After all, he clearly trusted government organizations enough to enlist their help to save Kyouka so surely-

"Dazai-kun is very much indeed like that," deadpanned the suit-wearing man. "I can't even blame him. The government has wronged Soukoku one too many times, after all. But enough about that. I just need you all to at least be there when Dazai-kun is extracted and rescued. If you can speed up the process of finding him, all the better. It is only important that Dazai-kun is returned." With that, the man bid them goodbye and took his leave as though he'd never even been there.

They all turned to Ranpo, who was now actually looking over the footage Ango had provided them with. "Is there anything you can tell us, Ranpo?" Asked Yosano-sensei, even as she prepared a bag of regular, normal medical supplies since her Ability wouldn't work on Dazai-san but he'd definitely need treatment if what Chuuya-san had said was right about Dazai-san's habits even before he was captured. Atsushi would be the happiest if he didn't imagine the sorry state his mentor might be in; even though he'd seen the man injured one too many times since he's known him, with the exception of the recent gun wound for which he ended up in the hospital, Dazai-san had always seemed unshakable, unbreakable, untouchable, even. Clearly, that was not the case, as No Longer Human only made him impervious to Abilities, not all types of harm.

"The group is definitely foreign, Birthish, I would say. Highly trained but no longer active soldiers; probably honorably discharged due to trauma or injury or maybe even just age that prevented them from being as effective in the field. I'd say some sort of special ops. Dazai was their very specific target and they seem to have been warned about him, as they seem to have used several methods to knock him out right on the spot, from hitting the back of his head, to chloroform gases to some sort of injection ... Is Dazai near immune to drugs or something? I know he's an insomniac so he doesn't stay unconscious for long but damn, this seems like overkill."

"Ranpo, focus," the President reminded and the great detective smiled sheepishly before focusing on the task at hand.

"Dazai was clearly an ordered target, because none of them show any sort of emotional response to having captured him. My estimate is that they've staked out the graveyard for the past week or so before the kidnapping took place. For all that the kidnapping happening didn't seem to be in alignment with Dazai's plans or wishes, he didn't seem surprised, which means he's been aware of their presence. I bet that if we were to go to that place," he pointed to the image of an unconscious Dazai-san being secured and carried away by six men. "We'd find a clue Dazai left in an attempt to communicate."

"So we have to go and find the clue before the Mafia does, right?" Junichiro asked, already preparing to dash off at the first order from the President.

The man, however, shook his head. "We shan't interfere. Don't give me that look; you all heard Sakaguchi Ango - the Port Mafia are more than adept at this kind of thing regarding Dazai. Nakahara, if no one else, would have already found whatever clue Dazai left behind, so going there would be an unfortunate waste of time. We need to be one step ahead of them if we even want to keep up."

"The President is right," Haruno-san says as she shows them a tablet. It was showing what seemed to be recently acquired footage of the graveyard, where a group of mafia-black dressed men combed through the area that had been shown on the security video Ranpo-san had just been viewing, with the very distinct form of Nakahara Chuuya suddenly all but flying towards a certain spot, picking something up and moments later barking orders at the others before the Mafia simply left the scene. "I've taken the initiative to contact Katai-san and he was kind enough to provide us with this footage from five minutes ago. Nakahara Chuuya has found a clue. Katai-san was able to get a glimpse of the item-" she said as she flipped to a blurry image that had already been zoomed in and sharpened as much as was possible. "-but says he's not entirely sure what this is, besides looking like a piece of electronics."

"It looks like the Port Mafia standard communicator," Kyouka-chan surprised them by commenting. "They're usually used for larger collaborations between squads during a live battle. They're made by a tech company that works solely for the Port Mafia as of six and a half years ago. There's no doubt about it; I may have never used one myself, but all assassins in training were taught about them and their standard use."

"That doesn't really look like a communicator, though," commented Kunikida-san while frowning at the image. "I can't imagine something of that shape ever being near a person's ear or even attached to their clothing."

"It's part of the communicator; it amplifies and isolates the signal. It has a wireless earpiece connected to it. That part is usually kept in a pocket or some place near your person," explained the former Mafia assassin.

"So if it isolates the signal, doesn't that mean that, without it, the frequency is available to everyone?" Tanizaki asked and Kyouka-chan hummed in thought.

"Well, I suppose it would be available to anyone who can catch the frequency, but they'd need to be pretty close to catch it without the amplifier."

"So we still need a general idea of where Dazai might've been taken if we want to have any hope of finding him," their resident doctor said with a frown.

"But can't Katai-san do something?" Atsushi felt the need to ask. "I mean, like taking over the Eyes Of God or something with his Ability and tracking down Dazai-san the way Dazai-san had Fitzgerald do for Dostoevsky? Or we could just ask Fitzgerald himself for the favor?"

"We don't even know what Dazai offered Fitzgerald in the first place to get his cooperation," the President said with a resigned-looking scowl. "It is unlikely that anything short of our Permit would be the cost of any help we might get in return. And most definitely not if the Port Mafia decides to reach out to him, first. I doubt we'd have anything to negotiate with if they get involved."

"I'm sure Dazai-san would find a way," the weretiger muttered to himself but it seems that the others have heard him because they all paused.

"I never realized just how much actual work and effort Dazai put into the behind the scenes things he does," Kunikida-san said with a conflicted look on his face.

Ranpo-san surprised them all by replying to that. "That's because we can't flaunt that we have the Demon Prodigy protecting us from the shadows. What? Surprised?" He asked them with a condescendingly arched eyebrow. "I mean, I have to admit, it took even me until I saw him and Mori interacting to realize just who we had in the Agency and how lucky we've turned out to be that Dazai decided to turn over a new leaf for whatever reason, but in hindsight, it's quite obvious. Still, even before we knew the true extent of his involvement with the Mafia, when we were all deliberating over whether we should let Dazai join the Agency or not, it wasn't just Kunikida who vouched for him."

"Wait, Ranpo," Yosano-sensei interrupted, looking a little miffed. "You approved of Dazai back then behind my back? Even when I told you he unsettled me?"

"I'm not sorry," was all she got in response to that, making her scowl fiercely. "Look, whether you lot realize it or not, Dazai is the one who's kept the Agency from encountering any significant bumps in the road until we took in a certain weretiger with a bounty on his head and a bone to pick with Port Mafia's Rabid Hellhound. His knowledge, understanding of the underworld and just pure politics, as well as any connections he has in the other parts of the Tripartite System is what's kept us afloat when we stumbled upon highly sensitive cases involving the upper echelons of either the government or the Port Mafia. I don't know exactly how he does it and that's for the best, really; it's highly illegal activity that the President and I turn a blind eye to." When everyone turned to the man, Fukuzawa-shachou nodded to confirm this. "Point of this whole little tangent is: Dazai is far from a lazy bum who does nothing but provide comic relief around the office and the rare wise input. He's a vital part of what keeps the Agency safe. And dangerous enough that no one else but the Mafia or the government try to seriously take us on. If we lose him, we're not just losing a valued coworker; we're losing an edge we can't afford to if we want to continue functioning."

"And yet, despite knowing all that, none of you react when Dazai-san goes missing?" Atsushi can't help but ask, half accusing and half incredulous. Atsushi knew his mentor was something else, that he always had a plan, a solution, to practically every situation. He also knew how much too-much Dazai-san can be, that he can do silly and stupid things that make people doubt how serious he might be, but still! Even if Atsushi hasn't been around for the other two years Dazai-san has worked for the Agency, recent history, if nothing else, shows that the man's disappearances could mean a huge shift is going to happen in Yokohama. Shouldn't that, at least, be reason enough to take such instances more seriously?

"Dazai does it far too often for us to try and decipher when he's actually in danger and when he's just trrying out a new suicide method to skip out on work," Kunikida-san - weakly - defends and Atsushi frowns as something occurs to him.

"Wait, weren't they angry we took those as a joke, too?"

"Who was, Atsushi?" Kenji-kun asked, for once not smiling or cheery.

"And what about?" Naomi-san also asked, for once not molesting her brother in public.

"Both the disappearances and the suicide attempts. Yeah, I'm pretty sure they were really angry about them both," he said, trying to recall the details of all the mafiosos' reactions to how they usually 'handle' Dazai-san in such situations. "Yeah, the Mafia Boss and Chuuya-san looked rather angry when we dismissed it. Even Akutagawa showed enough emotion to display how displeased he was. Maybe we've been too ignorant? Maybe we shouldn't have taken them as jokes."

"We never knew he was actually serious," Tanizaki weakly said, looking vaguely ashamed.

"No, we knew," Ranpo-san cut off, looking out the window with a distant expression. "We all just collectively chose not to do anything about it because we were uncomfortable, because we didn't know how to deal with it. And that's on us. The Armed Detective Agency is supposed to help people, yet we couldn't even help Dazai."

The entire staff looked incredibly ashamed of themselves as they realized that Ranpo-san, as always, was right. Atsushi himself could only clench his fists and grind his teeth. He should have done more for the man who had saved him. He was still far too weak. He needed to get stronger, not only so he can stand as a worthy opponent to Akutagawa in six months, but also so he can protect Dazai-san, who clearly needs more protection than they would have ever realized on their own had the Port Mafia not stepped in this time and told them, practically spelled it out for them.

Would they have even acted on time, this time, had the Mafia not gotten involved? After all, no one had acted at all when the Mafia kidnapped Dazai and that's the longest time the man's been missing to date since Atsushi started working at the Agency. No one had batted an eye, even after he said he had been in the Mafia's captivity all those days. They'd just demanded a report. And while Dazai-san seems to have had that ... encounter completely under control and managed to come back on his own, would that have been the case now? When he seems to have been caught off guard? Would the Agency have found Dazai-san dead after a few more days when they finally deigned to investigate his disappearance? Or would any and all clues, traces and trails of him be gone, whether he was dead or alive, never to be found again? Would it be his fault for not insisting more on how uneasy he felt each and every time his mentor disappeared like this? Especially after all the recent events?

"Then we just have to do better," Fukuzawa-shachou said, breaking Atsushi out of his spiraling self-pitying thoughts. "We'll make sure Dazai is safe from both himself and outside forces from now on. And we will find him."

"That's the spirit," a new voice said, coming from the open window near the couch, and everyone whirled around, weapons and Abilities ready, to see a strange man dressed in a long brown cloak and English-style hunting cap, casually sitting there, the expression of a satisfied yet also indifferent tabby on his face. From what little Atsushi could see of his hair, it was multi-colored and he had a mustache. He also seemed to be a man in the more mature stages of life, but the confidence he held himself with suggested he was still perfectly capable as when he had been younger. He also held a cane in one gloved hand.

"Natsume-sensei?" The President asked before anyone - namely Kunikida-san - could demand the man introduce himself and state his business here.

"Hello there, Yukichi-bozo. I'd like to chat, really, but we're on a tight schedule," the man - Natsume, apparently - said as he extended a slip of paper to the person nearest to him, which just so happened to be Kenji-kun. The blond took the paper seemingly without a care or worry in the world, making a confused face when he opened it.

"I'm still not the best at navigating a city as big as this, but isn't this in Suribachi, the great big crater on the edges of Port Mafia territory?"

"Indeed you are right, young lad," purred the newcomer.

"Is that where Dazai-san is?" Atsushi couldn't help but ask, couldn't help but hope that, perhaps, they can make sure his mentor was safe and sound, or will be soon enough.

"That is correct, young weretiger."

"But why there?" Kunikida-san asked, taking the slip when Kenji-kun handed it over for the senior detectives to inspect. The President, on the other hand, didn't seem to be questioning the validity or source of this information whatsoever. Atsushi could only hope that meant that the man was really trustworthy.

"I'd say a sense of poetic irony. The incident in Suribachi seven years ago is, after all, where Dazai-kun first gained his grandourous infamy, after all," this Natsume man replied. "I suggest you hurry up. Dazai-kun's partner has already figured out where he's being held captive and Ougai-bozo is on the move. And while I trust that Ougai-bozo really wouldn't want to risk Dazai-kun's life or well-being, I'd sleep better at night knowing the boy has indeed returned safe and sound."

"Sensei, how do you know Dazai? It sounds like you've been personally acquainted," asked Fukuzawa-shachou and that's something everyone else seems to have noticed as well. Ranpo-san was even frowning suspiciously at the man, which can never be good. But he was helping them find Dazai-san so surely he can't be a bad person, either, right?

Except literal criminals, butchers, murderers and torturers were the first ones to even begin the search ...

'How is this even my life?' Atsushi couldn't help but wonder.

"Let's just say that, once upon a time, three friends walked into the bar and the youngest among them took one look at a cat and decided to bow," the strange man retorted with amusement and Fukuzawa-shachou's eyes widened at the cryptic piece of information. "Ever since, milk and sardines and plenty of belly or behind the ear scratches waited for the cat each time the trio would visit, or even when they wouldn't. Hence, I decided that, should Dazai-kun ever need anything, I'll provide. I am the one who got him discharged from the hospital and provided him with some vital information he needed to get Dostoevsky arrested."

"Hah!" Ranpo-san suddenly laughed. "Of course Dazai would find the best informant in town and make friends! Crafty beanstalk!"

"So you're here to help us find Dazai-san?" Kyouka-chan asked, but not nicely or kindly as she usually would. Her face was hard set and her tone a bit cold, eyes furrowed in a glare. Atsushi was suddenly reminded that Dazai-san was very important and almost a mentor to Kyouka-chan, too. It seemed like Dazai-san had a thing for helping orphans ...

"I, unfortunately, can't personally get involved, nor do I need to. Nakahara will be more than enough to get Dazai-kun back and Ougai-bozo is more than skilled enough to treat the injuries he has sustained." The entire office either tensed or gasped at the confirmation that their fellow Agency member was, indeed, harmed. Fukuzawa-shachou looked even more guilty than he had before. "The Mafia will take care of the enemy organization, but I need you to take Dazai-kun back with you lest the government think he decided to go back to his old ways. The Division won't be able to vouch for him for the second time, especially not since half of them were still convinced he was behind Shibusawa's bullshit a few months ago. Ango's and Santoka-bozo's word is the only thing keeping him from the government's greedy hands, but it seems they've finally resorted to less than legal means to acquire Dazai-kun."

"What do you mean?" Demanded Yosano-sensei.

"So that's the reason behind his kidnapping?" Ranpo-san half asked, half stated at the same time. "They were hoping they could arrest Dazai, but with his records erased, basically giving him a clean slate, and Ango and Mori vouching that Dazai was helping defeat Shibusawa and then helping capture Dostoevsky, thus saving both organizations' leaders, Dazai is an upstanding, innocent citizen out of their reach. And they want him for his Ability, right? No Longer Human is unlike anything else in the world; only a fool wouldn't covet it, especially if they desire control over Ability users."

"Yes, that is correct," confirmed Natsume. "However, it's more than just them getting impatient; other world governments have started hearing about No Longer Human, too, and have become interested, intrigued, curious. The group that has taken Dazai-kun this time might have been hired by the Japanese government, but many governments have sent secret agents or forces through their underground organizations. The Special Abilities Division has managed to thwart quite a few from even entering Yokohama, including those sent by Great Britain's own Order of The Clock Tower, but this time, they couldn't."

"Because they had the government's invitation," Kunikida-san said with a heavy scowl. "They were set on taking Dazai as soon as possible."

"Before some other organization might get their hands on him before they get the chance, indeed."

"Then what are we waiting for?" Tanizaki-kun asked, looking at everyone in the office.

"He's right. We have a suicidal maniac to bring home," agreed Kunikida-san and everyone's mood started shifting towards battle-readiness.

Yosano-sensei even had a very frightening grin on her face. "I'll go get my cleaver."

Everybody shuddered and didn't question it.

Natsume took this chance to leave.

Lucky bastard, everyone thought.

(Haruno, meanwhile, wondered why the man seemed so familiar to her when she was sure she'd never seen him before in her life.)

00000

Nakahara Chuuya hated how his day has been going so far.

It had started a bit more shitty than it usually did, since there was some sort of breach in one of their warehouses last night so he had to investigate it. Then Akutagawa made that fateful call and Port Mafia has been scrambling and running around like headless chickens as their superiors try to figure out how best to approach Dazai's newest 'fuzz up'.

The visit to the Agency had only managed to enrage them more, with Chuuya needing to be more or less restrained before he crushed the entire building under vicious gravity for the blatant neglect they were showing his (former?) partner and the Boss leaving it at cutting words and taunts. Chuuya wished he could have at least gotten the chance to give them a piece of his mind; he hadn't kept Dazai alive for three years and then for months since their fateful reunion only to have these fuckers let the bandaged bastard die because they were too lazy to give a fuck.

Going to the graveyard, where they found their final clue as to locating Dazai, had been surreal. Chuuya hadn't really known Oda Sakunosuke all that well, but he'd definitely exchanged a few words with the man. Dazai had certainly been rather excited, and genuinely at that, to introduce the important redheads in his life. Hell, Chuuya was pretty sure even Ane-san had been introduced to the man, basically making him an official unofficial part of Dazai's inner circle. Hirotsu-san, who had met the man even without such an introduction, had certainly seemed to respect his skill and dedication and had even said Oda was good for Dazai. Chuuya will not lie that there were times when he got a bit jealous of the older man, but he knew Dazai tended to attract people who he needed the most to teach him about different aspects of life that made living beautiful, even if the brunet didn't seem conscious of it.

After all, Chuuya's unwillingness to give up his humanity even for a second, even if it meant he was giving himself a handicap in a fight by not using his hands, had had a hand in making Dazai consider it worth it to stick around in the land of the living for a bit longer. Q gave Dazai something akin to a younger sibling who needed him, the same later for the Akutagawas even though poor Ryunosuke only met the cold, calculating Dazai the Boss and their profession preferred and not the Dazai who had argued with man and monster over Chuuya's humanity. Hirotsu-san had been the first one to show Dazai any proper respect as a leader and had established, basically, how subordinates should be treated but also had somehow developed a familial relationship with him that neither verbally acknowledged. With Kouyou, though, it was different, Dazai-calling her Ane-san and the woman scolding him like a younger brother whenever he and Chuuya got up to their usual antics.

Oda and Ango were just a part of Dazai's collections of bits and pieces of humanity, of what made life worth living. Even Mori, in his own way, was there and, of course, the Agency was later added on, no doubt.

So losing even one, let alone two such precious and rare bits must have been quite the hit for Dazai. Chuuya still didn't know the full circumstances behind Oda's death but he knew his partner, in part, blamed the Boss. Perhaps not enough to enact some sort of revenge, which was a blessing for the Mafia, but enough that he was ready to leave and to threaten the Mafia as he needed to achieve his own goals.

Standing in front of the man's humble grave overlooking the ocean under the shade of a tree with church bells chiming behind him had made Chuuya feel almost like he was standing in front of Rimbaud's grave again. Perhaps Oda had been Dazai's Rimbaud, the one person who gave him hope that there might be something human within his hollow soul. Just for that possibility, Chuuya had to pay a silent moment of respect to the grave before he devoted his attention to finding Dazai. Oda would not be happy that his young friend was still missing.

It didn't take long to find the communicator piece and it took even less time to figure out which frequency it was set to; Soukoku's old go-to frequency that only they used to communicate solely with each other. Chuuya, when connecting the communicator to a computer and additional signal amplifier waiting in one of the cars, brought thoughtfully by one of Dazai's former men - indeed some of the most competent individuals and teams within the Mafia, rivaling the Flags in efficiency even though they covered the difference in outright strength and skill in numbers - found out that Dazai wasn't even all too far from the graveyard. He was definitely close enough for the communicator to still catch some noise from the earpiece, even though it wasn't clear enough to decipher what was being said.

Chuuya immediately relayed this information to the Boss, the general localization now serving to narrow down the search for the signal for the bugs from the Agency, allowing the technicians put in charge to completely ignore all bouncing decoy signals around Yokohama and instead focus on the ones in the area.

By the time Chuuya arrived for the tactical meeting planning the retrieval raid, Dazai's possible location was narrowed down to two possible buildings out of the four signals that had been bouncing around in that area. "The only reason we can't get a definite location is because the buildings are too close together on the overall scale. It would only take more time than necessary to isolate the single signal. We have more than enough men to attack both places at once," the Boss explained. "Hirotsu-san is already preparing the strike teams. I'll lead one raid, you lead the other. Kouyou-kun and Hirotsu-san will accompany me; you take Akutagawa-kun. I also figured you should be the one to choose the location you want to raid."

Chuuya had frowned at that and thought it over before giving any sort of reply. "Is it possible for me to choose when we get to the buildings?" His elders and subordinates all seemed confused and surprised by the request, even the Boss seemed to have genuinely not been expecting that, but he gave his permission. They all saw the reason behind his request as soon as everything was ready and they set off to the area. Gunmen set a perimeter within five minutes that encased the whole three blocks surrounding the two buildings which were two streets apart. The second Chuuya was on the scene, the location on the right had something in his instincts tingling; a sensation he vaguely remembers feeling each and every time he uses Corruption, the sensation getting stronger and stronger with each second before he's brought back. One may even call it his Dazaidar. His mackerel locator beacon. "If you don't mind, Boss, I'll be taking this one."

"Of course, Chuuya-kun. Remember to keep us updated," the former doctor replied, him and his chosen squad already turning in the other direction. Perhaps that much men would be overkill even if the man wasn't Port Mafia's Boss, but tonight wasn't just about retrieving Dazai; they had a bold enemy organization to kill, to wipe them off the face of the Earth and send the clear message that, even when he's not actively Port Mafia, the Demon Prodigy was still theirs and off limits. This is a lesson Chuuya will gladly teach a thousand times over, to numerous idiots, for the rest of his life if he needs to.

After all, Dazai was his partner, not to mention that he laid claim on his life when they were fifteen. Anyone who challenges Chuuya's dibs on when that man can die deserve whatever hell he unleashes upon them for daring to interfere with Soukoku's Soukokuness.

"Kill indiscriminately," was the only instruction he gave Akutagawa and the men who would follow them in to take care of any stragglers or runners while the two higher ranking mafioso focused on Dazai. Chuuya knows his partner will need help just getting out of here, let alone any medical assistance he might need, so having to focus on both him and the enemy would be tiresome, especially since Chuuya will have to be the one to haul his ass out. Akutagawa was almost as weak as his mentor in that regard, the both of them all skin and bones. Chuuya swears he'll fix that one of these days. He'll even get Gin to help him.

Akutagawa was a little too enthusiastic to go back to his usual MO instead of sticking to that no killing for six months deal he made with the weretiger. The brat was too blood thirsty to hold it up and, besides, knowing their fucking luck, another war will break out in Yokohama soon enough and having Akutagwa imitating Oda would do no one any favors. Chuuya dealt with his own fair share of idiots; there were a lot more than they initially thought, given this was supposed to be a 'small' group. They still haven't run into the group directly responsible for Dazai's kidnapping and they better fucking hope it stays that way. Neither Chuuya, nor Akutagawa, nor any of Dazai's men following after them are in a charitable, merciful mood.

It was a bloodbath worthy of any and all Soukoku or even just Dazai related missions. No one cared that their expensive shoes or clothes were soaked in blood and entrails, too focused on their mission. Chuuya eventually managed to track down someone of higher rank and while he was no Dazai, he knew how to intimidate and torture for information, too. Within minutes, Chuuya was informing the Boss that his hunch had been right and that Dazai was held in a makeshift cell down in the basement of this building. He left the carnage to Akutagawa and the grunts, instead speeding through any and all idiots trying to get in his way to his partner.

Within maybe five or six minutes, he found Dazai all alone in a room that had clearly just been abandoned of any other presence. Chuuya's blood boiled when he saw the state the lanky brunet was in. He was bruised on the right side of his face, his lip was cut from where he had been punched and there was a nasty, though thankfully shallow gash on his temple. His clothes were dirty, his hair a mess, some caked blood here and there. What truly infuriated Chuuya, perhaps more than the sunken in eyes and extremely dry lips that suggested dehydration and the pallor that indicated starvation and exhaustion, among other things, was the bare throat and forearms.

These fuckers had dared take off Dazai's bandages and add a few more scars on the pale skin.

Chuuya was nanoseconds away from just letting his rage summon Arahabaki to the forefront even without his chant, when Dazai's eyes fluttered open, unfocused and dull.

'Shit, he's drugged.' And it had to be quite the drug or quite the dosage, too. Dazai had an incredible tolerance and resistance to such bullshit, so for him to seem so out of it ... Chuuya would rather not think about it or else he might just lose control.

"Chibi?" Came the inquiry on a heavy tongue, the nickname rolling off as though through water. Dazai blinked at him a few times before groaning, and it wasn't one of his aggravating, annoying fake groans, either.

Chuuya was by his side, breaking his shackles in seconds. One of them, he noted, had been undone, clearly before whatever they gave Dazai actually incapacitated the man, while the other still had the pin stuck in it, somehow hidden from clear view. Dazai had, apparently, managed to keep just enough wits about himself to not alert his captors to his spectacular lock-picking skills so Chuuya almost sighed in relief. But, then again, this was no indication that Dazai was safe from a potentially lethal overdose. It was Dazai, after all.

He didn't even grunt as he caught the taller man, easily holding him up despite the height difference. Dazai was like a limp noodle in his arms. "Shit, what did they fucking give you?"

"A right cocktail," groused the other somewhat coherently. "They realized pretty quickly that drugs don't really have the desired effect on me. I think I need to get my stomach pumped and a lot of IV and vitamins and shit."

Chuuya cursed some more as he rearranged the detective so he could more easily pick him up. "Any injuries I should be particularly wary of? I'm going to carry you out. The Boss has everything ready to treat you and don't you even dare start trying to protest that."

"Wasn't going to," Dazai admitted tiredly and now Chuuya knew for sure that his partner wasn't exactly in the clear yet. Whatever mix of drugs and sedatives were coursing through his blood were really doing a number on him. It was kind of scary to witness first hand. Even when Dazai had made attempts on his life by cutting or an overdose, he still had been more present than he was now. It made Chuuya want to decimate this whole building and everyone in it but he refrained. Not only were his subordinates here, but he also had to focus on Dazai. He'll go on a hunt if there was anything left to hunt after he's sure his partner was out of potentially mortal danger. "Honestly, wasn't sure what to expect ... Knew Chibi would come ... Wasn't expecting anyone else ... "

"Hey, stay awake, bastard!" The redhead commanded as he hauled his partner into his arms and started sprinting back up to the main floor and out of the building. The Boss should have arrived by now. He'll know how to treat Dazai and save his life. If anyone was an expert at keeping the bandaged bastard alive, it was Mori Ougai and Nakahara Chuuya. "And of course we'd come! You're still shitty Dazai. We're practically obliged to save others from your infuriating presence. Besides, can't have you spilling Mafia secrets with your blabbing lips and lolling tongue."

Not that either of those things were true. The Port Mafia had nothing to fear of Dazai revealing their secrets, for all that he'd threatened to do as such in exchange for his own safety before the whole three way war with Guild descended on Yokohama. If anyone knows how to keep a secret when they want to, it's Dazai. And the Port Mafia was most definitely not obliged to do anything regarding Dazai, they just wanted to. Whether anyone, including the man himself, would accept it, Dazai was still Mafia and the Mafia protected its own ... Most of the time, anyway. But usually, retribution was swift and gleeful, especially when someone so high ranked and precious was targeted.

Besides, the Boss can't welcome Dazai back into the fold if Dazai was dead.

And Chuuya can't kill Dazai with his own hands when he feels like it if someone else already got that honor which was bloody reserved for Chuuya by law or something.

So, yeah, of course they had to save shitty Dazai.

And the bastard would usually know it and taunt them for it, too. Which means this was definitely one of the worst states Chuuya had ever seen his partner in, which only increased his worry and his blood-lust. Arahabaki was practically screaming inside of his head for retribution, even with the comforting buzz of No Longer Human soothing the calamaty god inside of him. It's so rare for vessel and god to agree, but this time they did. Chuuya had the feeling he'll be able to cause even more chaos and destruction when destroying Dazai's kidnappers, if any were even left by now.

To prove Chuuya's worries were well founded, Dazai warned Chuuya he was going to hurl the second they reached the top of the stairs leading from the basement. The ginger mafioso cursed as he swiftly but gently put Dazai down and held him steady as the brunet threw up. After what seems like an eternity of emptying an already pretty empty stomach and a lot of dry heaving, Dazai calmed down and leaned against his partner like all the energy had been sapped out of him but he was still holding onto consciousness. He was also holding onto the left side of his ribs and his breathing had a hard time evening out, alerting Chuuya to the fact that the mummy wannabe hadn't told him if he had any injuries besides the obvious. He noted in his mind the possibility of at least bruised ribs before the world froze when Dazai looked up at him, barely lifting his head up enough to do so.

There was blood streaming down his face from his nose and his eyes looked bloodshot.

Chuuya very nearly started panicking.

Instead, he cursed like a sailor and forgot all about the ribs, instead hauling Dazai back into his arms and all but sprinting towards the exit. Dazai needs serious medical attention, yesterday! As long as the ribs aren't broken and poking at his lungs, a little jostling won't do too much harm. Might even keep the detective more awake and aware.

In less than a minute, he was finally out of the building, just in time to meet Mori as an ambulance owned by the mafia pulled up. The Boss took one look at his (former) protege and the cold fury that overtook his eyes would have made a lesser man quiver. Chuuya just relished in it, knowing all his actions will be sanctioned so if there is even anyone left to take revenge upon, he can do so as he pleases.

Still, they both prioritized the barely conscious man Chuuya carried over and put down on the medical cot already taken out of the vehicle. The Boss was already readying an IV drip as Dazai was settled before he took out his standard tools, taking Dazai's blood pressure, checking his eyes, listening to his breathing and checking his head for serious head wounds that might have caused a concussion. Miraculously, Dazai was not concussed, which will probably make things easier as he can rest without worrying of complications. His breathing seems to have also eased up but he looked more ready to pass out than in all the time Chuuya had known him.

"You can rest now, Dazai-kun. You are in safe hands. I'll just apply a drip that will help with the drugs in your system and the dehydration and malnutrition. I took a sample, we'll know in a few minutes what they gave you for proper treatment. When you're asleep, I'll treat your wounds. Chuuya-kun, I am sure, will be more than happy to attend any and all medical procedures I preform, so your safety is secured. You can sleep now-"

"Tower," Dazai interrupted, not seeming the least bit perturbed that it was the Boss treating him despite the shows of hostility he's made towards the man since he resurfaced on the Mafia's radar.

"Pardon?" Both Chuuya and the Boss asked, frowning at the former Executive, who was finally seeming less coherent.

"Order ... Tower ... "

The realization was swift and infuriating. The culprit, besides obviously the Japanese government, was the Order of the Clock Tower. They were either the first ones to make their interest in Dazai known, thus forcing the government make their move, or they were the ones who prompted the government to try and get their hands on the only Anti-Ability user known in the entire world. And Dazai, drugged up, exhausted, starved, dehydrated, beat up Dazai, had taken the time to gather information in between what seems to be torture sessions.

Oh, someone's going to pay.

"We heard you loud and clear, Dazai-kun. Sleep now," ordered the former underground doctor and Dazai actually listened, going limp on the cot even as two IV drip needles pierced the soft skin on the inside of his elbow. Chuuya waited in silence as the Boss worked, stewing in anger and the need for revenge. Finally, when all the initial prep work for further treatment was finished, amethyst eyes met opal. "Find Dazai-kun's capturers. Show him Port Mafia's full hospitality and report everything you can find out to me."

"Ougai-dono," Kouyou said, surprising them with her silent presence. Both men turned to the elegantly dressed female samurai, her blade still out of the scabbard within her umbrella, dripping blood onto the ground. "Leave that to us," she continued upon gaining their full attention. "We'll get all the information you need and when Dazai is better, you can compare notes. For now, Chuuya has a promise to keep to Dazai that you made in his name."

"Yes, please let Nakahara-sama stay by Dazai-sama," one of Dazai's loyal subordinates all but pleads. "We'll take care of everything else to Dazai-sama's standards, Boss. Once everything is in order and Dazai-sama is awake, we'll take over his security detail, as usual, and Nakahara-sama can hunt down all those even remotely or indirectly responsible for this situation. But we strongly believe that, until Dazai-sama awakes and is well enough to take care of himself, Nakahara-sama is the only one who will be able to safeguard him."

And as much as Chuuya wants to protest, wants to go on the hunt right away and tear apart any and all individuals or organizations responsible for Dazai's current condition, he knows they were right. Dazai hated hospitals almost as much as Chuuya himself did; the only thing that kept either half of Soukoku in a hospital long enough for at least the basic healing process to happen was the other one keeping him there for fear of complications in recovery down the line. Thus Soukoku guarded each other and kept each other company in any and all infirmary-like surroundings until either they are discharged or get too restless to stay in such a room any longer.

"If it's the same with you, Boss," Chuuya began, already moving to help load Dazai up into the back of the ambulance. "I'll be staying with shitty Dazai for a while."

The Boss seemed oddly satisfied with that and changed his orders. Before long, Hirotsu-san was in charge of Dazai's old squad and Ane-san was in charge of interrogation of all prisoners. Akutagawa reigned in his blood-lust and the extermination turned into a hunt.

As Chuuya and the Boss got into the ambulance with the unconscious shitty Dazai, something caught Chuuya's attention from the corner of his eye. Turning in that direction, he found the Armed Detective Agency assembled at the edges of the chaos the Mafia had made of the battlefield, staring at them stunned and with worryied expressions directed towards the ambulance with Dazai as the focus. The weretiger even made to come over but was held back by Dazai's 'partner'. Chuuya couldn't help but sneer at them, especially the blond. Dazai had been in their care and yet it had turned out like this. Never again will Chuuya trust the goody-two-shoes with his partner's safety. They did not survive Rimbaud and Verlaine and everyone and everything in between, including shitty Shibusawa and the rat, for these suckers to destroy Soukoku with their idiotic neglect.

Chuuya will have to talk with Dazai about all of this, will have to get him to reconsider at least moving out of the dorms the Agency was providing him for housing. Maybe have him move into Chuuya's spacious penthouse. That way he'll get proper heating, Chuuya's fridge was always full, his bathroom was top notch and Chuuya can keep an eye on him properly, both on the regular and right now, as he recovers and as the government and others suffer Port Mafia's retaliation for daring to touch their Demon Prodigy.

With a last sneer at the detectives, Chuuya slammed the doors of the back of the ambulance shut and ordered the driver to get them back to HQ, where the Boss can properly treat Dazai and Chuuya can wait for him to wake up and recover.

He'll have a stern talk with the Agency, as well as pay a visit to the others, later.

For now and forever, Dazai is the priority.

00000

Sitting behind several big screens and attentively studying each and every CCTV footage displayed before him in both real time and replayed, Sakagushi Ango couldn't help but sigh.

It was out of relief as well as defeat and frustration.

Dazai Osamu had been retrieved safely and was making a swift recovery, despite what seems to be a rather interesting and potent lethal mix of drugs in an attempt to keep him docile and vulnerable, to keep him from being the threat that he actually always is. The ones behind this miraculously efficient rescue were not, however, his current coworkers, but his former ones.

Ango had watched as former partner and protege tore apart anyone and everyone who got in their way until they got Dazai-kun back. He watched as Chuuya-kun carried him out, the taller man clearly in no state to be moving on his own. He watched as the Mafia Boss gave orders, no doubt regarding retribution.

He watched as the members of the Armed Detective Agency arrived too late to be of use and could only stand to the side and observe. He wasn't even surprised; no one could match the Port Mafia's obsessive need to keep the Demon Prodigy safe and out of enemy hands. They were, after all, possibly the only ones with even an ounce of understanding of just how truly dangerous Dazai Osamu can be when he puts his mind to it. It wouldn't even take them much imagination; Dazai-kun had already been the Mafia's wraith and showed them all of his darkness already.

In Ango was being honest right now, he can admit that he has mixed feelings about this whole ordeal.

The government, or maybe even several governments from all around the world, had just hired a mercenary group to track down and capture a single man. A single, incredibly dangerous and valuable man, no doubt, an Ability user with the most unique power in the world on top of that, but still just one man none the less. They used less than legal means to get what they want and were of the opinion that they will face no consequences for it just because Dazai Osamu is a former criminal, no doubt.

On one hand, Ango can almost applaud the audacity and the initiative these people have taken. On the other, Odasaku-san would be incredibly disappointed in him if he didn't try to help Dazai-kun to the best of his ability, despite all the lies and secrets that made up the man Oda Sakunosuke and Dazai Osamu used to know four years ago. Not to mention that Dazai-kun was doing his best to change, to become a better man, even if he cared little for such concepts outside of Odasaku-san's wish. So despite Dazai-kun's horrendous list of crimes, Ango wanted nothing more than to give his (former?) friend the chance to fulfill Odasaku-san's wish. Dazai-kun was, after all, not hurting or killing anyone anymore, not even his enemies.

Then there's the aspect of where Dazai-kun actually belongs, Odasaku-san's wish for him taken out of the equation. Ango had had hopes that the Armed Detective Agency would help provide Dazai-kun with the right kind of environment for the younger man to truly grow into his own, but he knew that was kind of foolish and naive of him; after all, Dazai-kun was, indisputably, born to be in the Mafia. The saying that his blood is Mafia black, more so than anyone else's, was so accurate that some of Ango's coworkers had actually tried to make the back-then teen bleed just to check the actual color of his biological blood. Ango is ashamed to have once had a similar thought process, but at least he'd waited until Dazai-kun naturally got hurt instead of instigating something to check the rumors. Still, the Agency had definitely given Dazai-kun new experiences to use as references and guidelines in being more 'normal-like', more humane, one would go as far as to say. It nurtured his softer side that the youngest Executive in Port Mafia history had rarely, if ever,had chance to display in the era of his former profession.

Ango had caught glimpses of it, don't misunderstand. Usually directed at his two - or three, if one counts Ozaki-san, who had been one of the first 'family members' a young Dazai-kun must have had upon being thrust into the Mafia world - favorite redheads, though in different ways, given how gentle and friendly he was with Odasaku-san and how brash and childish he was around Chuuya-kun. He treated those two so completely differently, like night and day, always worrying for Odasaku-san's safety while openly telling Chuuya-kun to catch bullets or stray enemy attacks. Yet his fondness for both men was undeniable.

After all, more than one fool had faced his wrath upon commenting even in passing how 'inhuman' Chuuya-kun's strength was, even though it hadn't exactly been meant as a slight against the gravity manipulator. It was still a stupid thing to say, especially around the ginger's partner, just like it was incredibly stupid to call Dazai-kun a monster around the other. Soukoku had always been strange like that, claiming nothing but hate between them yet being often times so unbearably soft or protective with the other.

If the Mafia did one good thing for Dazai-kun, it was pairing him up with Nakahara Chuuya.

Unfortunately, the Mafia seems to have been doing a lot better when dealing with Dazai-kun than the Agency has. After all, no one in the Mafia took Dazai-kun's attempts or disappearances as jokes. Even the bartender at Lupin had been informed by Chuuya-kun himself on one of the rare occasions Dazai-kun got drunk enough that he called his partner to come pick him up that he should keep knives, needles and cleaning products away from the actual bar area since locks mean jack shit to someone like Dazai-kun. So surely, if even a random bartender knew to take Dazai-kun's frequent suicide attempts seriously and if even the Port Mafia dropped everything to investigate any suspicious absences not previously announced by the man, then why couldn't the Agency, who were supposedly tighter-knit together due to their small numbers, do the same?

In a way, a very serious and important way at that, the Mafia was better for Dazai-kun. At least regarding his mental and physical health. Emotional is a bit iffy, but no one was perfect and Dazai-kun had always had a strange relationship with his emotions. Around the detectives, Dazai-kun seemed to be wearing more of a mask than ever; understandable, considering the Demon Prodigy was hardly a mask to begin with.

Perhaps if the truce between those organizations could persist, Dazai-kun could get the support he needs from both sides, since neither side can provide it fully to the extent that would make an impact? Ango knows that it's unlikely. Firstly, A5158, if no one else, will be out for blood, as will Akutagawa Ryunosuke. They won't rest until all those who've endangered Dazai are removed from the picture, including the whole government if it comes to it and the Port Mafia will hardly try to stop them; Mori-dono might even go out of his way to help them, if not Dazai-kun himself. After all, there is no love lost between either part of Soukoku and the government.

Secondly, the Agency might not be able to overlook the Mafia's blood-lust, especially concerning Dazai-kun and especially if they realize just how deep some bonds are. They might not be able to take it that Dazai-kun will find nothing but pleasure in the fall of the government, the same one that's been more or less unchanged since the Dragon Head incident or the creation of Suribachi city. Both incidents are rather personal to Dazai-kun, even if he'd only been present for one.

Again, Soukoku. That's all the explanation one needs.

Thirdly, the Agency and even the Special Abilities Division will hardly be able to overlook an international attack that is going to happen when the Mafia finally sets its sights on the Order of the Clock Tower and every and all other organizations that may have triggered the government into trying to take Dazai-kun so forcefully. The Agency and the Division share more similar traits in regards to morals than either do with the Mafia. Neither will be able to allow it, to accept it; they might even be pitted against them to prevent a near on declaration of war, though Ango is more than well aware that such a declaration may as well have been made, and not by the Mafia.

It's only a matter of time before they retaliate, though.

And if they have Dazai-kun on their side when they do ...

It's not going to be pretty, not for Europe at least.

Dazai-kun is very thorough.

And Arahabaki leaves very little behind its rampages.

Ultimately, Dazai-kun might surprise them all with the decision he makes when he is presented with the choice between the Mafia and the Agency. The brunet is known for being unpredictable, after all, but he does care about Yokohama to some extent and his promise to Odasaku-san 'binds' him to not simply destroy everything.

But would he choose the Agency over the Mafia?

Especially if something else comes along on the scale of the Guild, Shibusawa or Dostoevsky, where the Agency showed they are not enough to deal with it on their own even with proper leadership? Especially so when compared to the Mafia, which Dazai-kun can play like a fiddle to get the results he wants?

When push comes to shove, will it really be better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven?

Or will both crash in the wake of one man's humanity?

Ango doesn't know, but he knows who probably will.

After all, Dazai-kun always does.

OWARI