"Hello everyone and welcome to our second round of fanmail responses. I'm your host, Don Karnage."

The co-host steps in. "And I'm your co-host, Rodrick Heffley. Today, in the Chair of Honor, we have an exceptional super villain – Elmo Sputterspark a.k.a. Megavolt!"

Megavolt walks right out to the chair with a smile. "Thank you one and all. It's a pleasure to be out here."

Rodrick gave another warm welcome. "And it's an honor and a privilege to meet you. The first question in your fanmail is if you could go out with any woman, alive or dead, who would it be and why?"

"That's quite a considerable question," smiles Megavolt. "If I could go out with any woman, alive or dead, I would really have to go with Yzma, because she could cast a totally powerful spell on my worst enemy, Darkwing Duck. The ideal such spell would be that when he comes withing 400 feet of me, one of his own feathers comes loose and tickles him in the groin for four full hours. And Yzma's charms don't end there. She's just as capable of a contagious smile, even more so than Cinderella. And even without a magic potion, she's capable or luring anyone, familiar or not, into a giant mouse trap, which to me, could be quite useful."

"Now for our second question," smiles Don Karnage. "What weapons would you recommend against bothersome Baloo?"

"If you don't have an electrical superpower, like I do," Megavolt answers confidently. "the first weapon I'd recommend against an enemy, like Baloo, is a high voltage taser. If you do go for that, I recommend carrying an extra supply of darts and batteries for it. Another good weapon would be a pouch of ninja stars, ideally sharpened on a very rough stone like sandstone. Another ideal weapon would be a laser dazzler. And if you go for that one, I'd recommend carrying carrying spare batteries with it as well."

"Time for our third question," Rodrick carries on. "How does flying the Sea Duck for Hire for Hire compare with tormenting Darkwing Duck?"

Megavolt answers with a smile. "I have to say, tormenting Darkwing Duck was a blast, but working for Rebecca has been a pleasure thanks to the contract of total pampering, that my bestie here, Don Karnage, dreamed up. Her cooking tastes like heaven. All the foot messages are more soothing than watching Darkwing suffer third degree burns. The money is every bit as good. And getting my pilot's license, at her hands was quite a milestone for me. Karnage, I fully understand you were an early pilot, but the same milestone was every bit as big for me. I don't know where she sent Baloo or why, but I've experienced plenty of comfort and happiness in his place."

Don Karnage mentioned something that Megavolt hadn't heard about. "You'll be glad to hear that once bothersome Baloo has swapped his two wings for 18 wheels. He's now under contract to me for ten years, hauling building materials here in the American mainland, which brings us to our fourth question. How would you like him contracted to you as a seasonal vacation butler?"

Megavolt can barely believe it. "I've always wanted to enslave Gosalyn and Honker, but Baloo is plenty good enough."

Baloo is watching the coverage from his sleeper compartment while Karnage carried on. "And after all this loneliness, he's sure to take the offer."

Baloo is now, hysterically excited. "Finally, finally, finally! I no longer have to be lonesome out here!"

But Baloo does not hear what Don Karnage tells Megavolt next. "Baloo won't cost you a penny, and if he doesn't do what you say, he gets more time in the tickle machine."