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First of all… thanks to whoever it was that told me how to short-sheet her bed, the thought of it was funny but I know she would probably have come and joined us in the middle of our bed or something. Like a big smelly dog. Ewwwwwww.

And to those of you who suggested I leave him, well I can't. see, I am a big arsed fool in love and I know there is no way… no way in hell I can even breathe without him let alone live. And he is so cute, so dumb, but so cute. And genuinely sorry when I point out an obvious thing that normal people see. After all, he was raised by her and is blinkered.

Anyway, I took your advice and at the breakfast table I tried to ask her calmly in conversation why she threw all my things out.

"Were they yours?" she asked with huge eyes, her hands clutching at her pearls, and before you ask she really does wear bloody pearls. Her Sweetie Darling got them for her ya know. Ergh. F.M.L. Anyway, Jack became defensive and told me that he thought, maybe she didn't know they were mine and was clearing away stuff from an old flame or something.

I didn't really know what to say, I really thought his ex-wife Lucia had been the only one here but he had brought others here too? And men's items? So, now I know with a feeling of gut dropping clarity that Jack has had another man here in that bed.

I didn't know what to say so the conversation went back to Jack and COW, leaving me to chew over the facts so far. Jack has had lovers before, sure. Male and female, since he's bi. So am I and so have I. Not a deal breaker at all but, this place was special and he really made out like I was the first one here.

Does he tell all his conquests that?

Mind you, Lucia was his wife and he has told me… and she had too… that he has never considered anyone else for marriage. He only married her because she was preggers. Alice is a lovely little girl but her COW grandmother has little to do with her. A daughter. Apparently the old COW put on such a display at the gender reveal that Jack had to take her home, leaving Lucia alone to clean up the food from the floor. Apparently COW can tip tables when enraged. Like it was deliberate, the sex of the baby.

Even with Jack showing her in a book, she still believed Lucia deliberately had a girl child to spite her, knowing the need for an Heir. An Heir. Like they are the Rockefellers or something. Can you believe it?

It was the only time I know of that he stood up to her and chastised her.

So she had a 'heart attack' and wound up in hospital with the doctors all confused as apparently she was in perfect health. LOL So Jack now treats her like spun glass and she reminds him constantly of her 'bad heart' and takes these little pills that I am sure are tic-tacs in an old medicine jar. But you know how it is, Mama's Boy believes this.

So after a night of stewing and then this morning's theatrics I told Jack I was going home since I had things to do and the promise of a romantic weekend was a wash. He was upset of course, tried to talk me down in his usual manner. Lots of soft kissing, panting and pulling at my clothes like some sex would sort everything.

I know.

I am a dirty dog that does not usually give in but today I was pissed.

So my lovely friends, I write this at home in my little dingy flat. OK, my penthouse apartment I thought I was soon moving out of into Jack's lovely apartment across the way. As I stand here looking at my life crammed in here aroid me, I see glimpses of Jack but... he's not everywhere. He never settled with me. Is that a sign?

My only thought now is, how can I let her win like that. I feel stupid, I gave in again and she was triumphant.

I love Jack, with all my heart and I really want this to work. Us to work. But I need to find a way to cut those apron strings… or maybe the umbilical cord as it seems like she is still trying to breathe for him sometimes.

Any advice moving forward would be appreciated.