Eddie walked arm-in-arm with Travis, her boyfriend of about one month, as they had finished another date and he was walking her home to her apartment. They had met through a mutual friend and hit it off immediately. Though Travis was not conventionally handsome, he was still a catch.
He was smart, fun, compassionate, caring, and always the gentleman, opening doors and pulling out seats for her. Most impressive to her, he never ever tried to make a move other than a playful kiss on the cheek or a sensual kiss on the lips. Whereas most guys would try anything to get her in bed on the first date, Travis wasn't that kind of man. To Eddie, this made him even more attractive.
Truth be told, being partnered with Jamie on the job made Eddie realize she needed to up her standards when it came to men. Though she and Jamie had agreed to keep it professional after a drunken kiss a couple years ago, she kept mental notes of how Jamie treated female cops he interacted with at the precinct as well as women he helped on the street. If she couldn't date Jamie, she could at least look for good qualities Jamie had in other men.
She was hesitant to seriously date after her traumatic assault by Jake Singer. Sure, he had been a stock trader who was into yoga and easy on the eyes, but she should've known that did not mean he was Grade A material. In the back of her mind as a woman and as a cop, she knew this. But when you're a little too desperate for romantic connection, facts like that become technicalities.
It was completely Singer's fault, not Eddie's. "No" or "I can't" absolutely meant "No" or "I can't". But, she also had to admit if her antennae had been up a little more, she might've picked up on the weird signals before she even went on the ill-fated outing.
This is what made Travis so great. He was a good man, no weird signals or vibes. Not a good guy, but a good man she desired and wanted to go to the next level with in their relationship.
"Well, here we are!" Travis cheerfully observed as they arrived in front of Eddie's apartment. He leaned in, his lips dancing with Eddie's. Eddie groaned, feeling the heat rise within her.
When their lips parted, she looked at him with a longing in her eyes, a longing she hadn't shown anyone since that one drunk night with Jamie outside her apartment, the very place her and Travis were standing. This time, she was drunk with hope.
"Stay with me, tonight," she whispered, her right palm on his chest. "Please?"
Travis backed away from her slightly. "There's uh… There's something I need to tell you. Something I think you should know."
Oh no, Eddie thought. He's got a girlfriend and I'm the other woman. Wait, no. He's secretly married and I'm the mistress!
"No. It's not like that," Travis reassured her as if he could tell what she was thinking. "I want to… I want to stay the night, but I think you should know… I've never… Been with anybody before."
"Oh," Eddie said. As if there was a delay between what she was hearing and what it meant, when it registered in her mind, her eyes widened. "Oh!"
"Yeah."
Eddie knew she needed to proceed with caution. Both her and Travis were in their late-20s, she had her first time years ago in college and she personally knew no one that hadn't, but that wasn't everyone's life experience. In the end, all she really knew is that she cared deeply for Travis and didn't want to embarrass him.
"I have to ask," Eddie said, eyes curious while remaining kind. "Why? It's not like there aren't bevies of beautiful women in New York City."
"Well, first of all," Travis said raising his right pointer finger into the air, "I'm looking at the most beautiful woman in all of NYC right now."
Eddie blushed. Good comeback, she thought.
"But, honestly…" He stopped, looking down to the ground embarrassed.
"Hey," Eddie said, clasping his hand in hers. "It's me."
Travis exhaled. "I'm not exactly Ryan Gosling or John Mayer, Eddie. I mean, I'm alright. But women tend to not give me a second look, the whole brother not a lover thing."
Eddie nodded sympathetically. In the past, she was one of those women Travis described. If she could go back and smack her college-age self, she would. If she could go back and backhand the women who treated Travis like that, she'd do that, too.
"Also," he continued, "I never wanted to sleep with someone just to sleep with someone. I wanted to sleep with someone that I really, really cared for. Someone I…" He looked deeply into Eddie's eyes as if he was looking into her heart – no, her very soul. "Someone I could love."
Eddie felt it.
"And that person is you," Travis continued. "I do want to stay with you, tonight… But I want to be honest, too. And, considering what I just told you, if you want to call it a night or whatever, I underst–"
Eddie leapt into Travis' arms, kissing him deeply. She wanted him.
Their lips parted. "Spend the night with me. No judgement. No pressure. Just two adults who want to enjoy each other."
"Okay," Travis said quietly.
They rode up to her apartment in the elevator. Eddie felt her insides melting like butter, thanking the Universe that her apartment was only two doors away from the elevator. As the elevator lifted them above the ground floor, they just held each other and swayed to the silent music playing that only they could hear. It was their world, their night, and it was no one's business but their own what they did or did not do behind closed doors.
Later that night, Travis and Eddie laid in Eddie's bed, bodies pressed against each other. They took turns caressing each other, gently kissing each other. Eddie knew Travis would never be the same, but it wasn't like some dumb college hookup where she made a man out of some guy. Travis was already a man who didn't have to prove anything to her. And yet, she knew losing your virginity was no small matter.
"Hey," Eddie said, looking up at Travis. "You okay?"
"Yeah," Travis whispered. He closed his eyes as if in thought. As he opened them, he looked right into Eddie's eyes once more like he had done outside her apartment earlier that night.
"Eddie?"
"Yeah?"
He paused. "I'm glad it was you."
Eddie smiled sweetly.
She kissed him tenderly.
"Me, too."