My Favorite Regret

Chapter One: Never Be The Same

Lily opened her eyes to complete darkness. It took her a moment to remember why it was pitch. She reached up and removed the cloth from her eyes. As her eyes adjusted to the light she realized that not only was she in a room at the Leaky Cauldron, but she was alone. Lily couldn't believe she had a one night stand. 'What in the hell was I thinking?!' It was so completely out of character for her. She wasn't a virgin, but she never did anything rash when it came to relationships and she never had a one night stand. Of course that might be because no one had ever made her feel like she had last night. She wished she could blame it on Maddy keeping her drink topped off, but Lily was no light weight.

Lily grabbed her bra and put it on as well as her dress, but she couldn't for the life of her find her knickers. Then she realized. 'He probably took it for a trophy.' Lily soothed out her dress and groaned. Maddy was like a bloodhound when it came to sex. 'Please let her be sleeping.' Lily loved her best friend dearly, but a girl had to have some secrets right? She grabbed her wand and apparated to her room. Lily made quick work of undressing and getting a bath. She was in her closet with just a towel wrapped around her. She had just grabbed the shirt she wanted to wear when Maddy made a sudden appearance.

"So how was it?" Lily's mouth dropped. How could Maddy possibly know when Lily hadn't even said one word. Maddy had ducked out early with a good looking man she met on the dance floor, as usual. So it wasn't possible that she'd seen Lily with the mystery guy. Maddy smirked at her. "Relax, you have some very telling love bites there Honey." Maddy was a witch Lily met in college. They were complete opposites, but they had been paired to share a dorm. At first it was hell on Earth. Lily thought of her new Yank roomie as a female Sirius. Then one night Maddy had come home after being beaten and robbed. Lily had patched her up and took care of her. Ever since they had come to an understanding of friendship.

Lily's hand went to her neck. "Creeper, you scare me sometimes." She avoided the question. She grabbed some jeans and went to move past Maddy. "Do you mind?"

Maddy looked at her nails. "Not at all." Lily knew she was never going to get past her until she talked.

Lily sighed. "You're barmy. " She shook her head as Maddy grinned proudly. "Alright, it was mind blowing, I can't even begin to tell you how fantastic it was. And now I'll probably never see him again." She added on a sad note.

Maddy's mouth dropped open. "Why the hell not?" If a guy got the reserved Lily to use those kinda words to describe sex, then he must be a God. This couldn't be a one time thing. "Don't underestimate a great shag, it's a very powerful thing."

Lily turned a bright red. "I umm… Idon'tknowwhoheis." She turned her eyes up innocently as she waited for Maddy to interpret what she had just mumbled. She didn't have to wait long.

"You slept with a guy without knowing who he is?!" Maddy leaned forward and felt Lily's forehead with the back of her hand. "You don't feel hot." Lily pushed her hand away. "Hell must have frozen over."

Lily rolled her eyes. "I get it." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Fact is I don't know who he is and he was gone when I woke up, so I'll never know." She started dressing. "At least I don't have to hear you whine about how I need to 'get laid' for a while."

Maddy let out a loud laugh. "There's no such thing as too much sex, especially the mind blowing kind."

.: 1 1/2 Months Later :.

Lily was laying down on the cold bathroom floor yet again. She didn't know what she ate to cause this but it was going into the category of foods I will never eat again. Surely food poisoning ended after a week? She closed her eyes as she felt a cool cloth pat at her brow.

"Lils babe?" Maddy sounded like she was tip toeing around glass. Lily groaned in response. "Did you use protection on New Year's?" Lily's eyes snapped open and she immediately moved to retch. When she finished she laid back down on the tiles. "I'll take that as a no." Maddy said quietly. Maddy herself had a scare once and knew Lily would most likely try to convince herself that it wasn't possible and it wasn't necessary to check. "Lils, you haveta check. Trust me, its better to know." She also knew that until they saw a healer who confirmed it, Lily would try to reason it was a false positive.

Lily's mind was racing around in chaos. 'What the hell have I done?' She knew she wanted kids at some point, but she had hoped she was at least in love before getting pregnant. Now here she was 24 years old and pregnant by a one night stand with a man she didn't even know what he looked like. Her parents must be rolling in their graves. She forced herself to take in a big breath of air. "I can't do this alone." Her eyes were glossy with tears. "I…"

Maddy hugged her friend. "You're not alone. Now lets get you into a shower, cause you stink." Maddy wanted to make her laugh and it worked. She never underestimated the healing power of a laugh. "Maybe buy you a new toothbrush while we're out."

Lily came out of the shower and used a spell to dry and smooth her hair as well as add some light make-up. She put on the clothes Maddy had brought her. Luckily this time it was not the skimpy club outfits she usually tries to get Lily to wear. An hour later Lily was sitting in a waiting room and going insane. To anyone else it looked like Lily had had 10 expressos in 10 minutes. She was fidgety and checking to clock every minute. If Maddy hadn't stopped her she'd be pacing like no other. "How much longer?" She asked Maddy.

"Take a breath, that's it." Maddy saw her color improve. "Once they get us back there it won't take but a minute to find out." She put her hand on her friends. "Everything will be fine."

Lily took another deep breath. "I just never..."

"Lily Evans?" The healer asked.

"Here, I'm here." Lily stood immediately. Maddy sighed and followed Lily and the healer to an exam room.

The healer, Jacy, had rarely seen a woman as nervous as Lily before and she'd been doing this for 8 years now. "Tell me if I'm wrong, but is this your first time?" She saw Lily pale. "Its quite alright, everyone has a different reaction." She felt Lily's pulse. "Your pulse is fast but that's to be expected. Lets see." She ran her wand over Lil's forehead. "Temperature is normal." She looked at Lily. "This will feel a little strange, don't worry if it feels warm or cold." She pointed her wand at Lily's stomach and said a quick spell. Lily felt her whole body warm up. She found the feeling quite pleasant and it calmed her. "Congratulations Miss Evans, you are with child."

When Lily came to she was kinda numb. She couldn't wrap her mind around the fact she was pregnant. There was a human being inside her. Maddy was getting some juice for her from the cafeteria. Lily was so out of it she bumped right into Remus.

Remus smiled warmly at her. "Hey Lily." He kissed her cheek. "Are you alright?" He asked after a few seconds.

Lily shook her head out of its stupor. "Yes, I'm fine thank you. And you?"

Remus was about to respond when Jacy came out and handed her some vitamins and booklets on pregnancy. "If you have any questions, please don't hesitate."

After Jacy left she looked at Remus who beamed. "Congratulations." And she smiled although a little unsure. "So who's the lucky guy?"

Lily bit her lower lips. 'Good question.' "He's not really in the picture." Which wasn't a real lie. She smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, its an unusual situation is all."

Remus looked over his shoulder as there was a crash. 'Has to be Sirius.' He thought. Sure enough Sirius was on the floor with a beautiful blonde walking away from him. His attention went to Lily when she burst out into laughter. Almost hysterical laughter. He looked at her strangely and lifted an eyebrow. At least until the blonde came over and sat next to Lily handing her the juice.

"Sorry, there was this guy who wouldn't take no for an answer." It was then that Maddy realized that Lily was acting strange. "Lils, you okay babe?" Lily opened her mouth to answer when Sirius appeared in front of them. "Take the hint jackass." Lily smirked and she could tell Remus was just as amused.

Lily looked at Maddy. "Maddy, this is a good friend Remus Lupin and his friend Sirius Black. Guys this is Maddy Tyler." She watched Sirius ogled Maddy and Maddy rolled her eyes.

Remus stood. "Well we should get going, but congratulations again."

Sirius looked at Lily. "Congrats on what?"

When no one said anything Lily sighed. "I'm pregnant." She offered knowing Sirius wouldn't let it go until he knew.

Sirius looked at her finger and saw no ring, "Always pictured you as the type to say no until the wedding." He glared at Maddy as she stepped on his foot. "Well its been as much a pleasure as always, but Remus and I have a previous engagement. Unless of course your friend here wants to change my mind." Maddy stomped on his foot again. "Another time then." He dragged Remus away.

Lily looked at Maddy knowingly. "I knew you'd like him."

Maddy nodded. "Did you see his ass? That's gotta be top 3. You don't think I was too abrupt do you?"

Lily learned a long time ago the more physical Maddy was with a guy, the more she liked him. "I think he liked it. Probably bored of dating the usual." She took the juice from Maddy and took a long drink. "He's just as sexual as you are. The Gryffindor Sex God as it were."

Maddy smiled. "So that's where you know them from, school?" Lily nodded. "I hope you didn't date him…"

Lily let out a snort. "God no! He is so far from my type, besides there was always the whole James thing." Lily realized her mistake too late.

"And who is James?" Maddy looked at her like a cat looks at a canary. "And why am I just now hearing about this? You've been holding back."

Lily nodded."There were the three boys; James, Sirius, and Remus. They weren't just best friends but more of brothers. They were the most desirable guys at Hogwarts. Chances are that you had a crush on at least one of them. Remus is the smart gentleman, Sirius is the charming rogue, and James is the golden boy, a sort of balance between the other two, Since the third year of school James seemed to have quite the crush on me. He would ask me out almost daily. I always said no, but it wasn't until seventh year that he stopped asking me out."

Maddy looked at her suspiciously. "And what was wrong with this James?"

Lily sighed, "At first the fact that he had played every prank in the book on me. Then it would make me mad that he was always making a scene around me. And then there was the fact no guy wanted to ask me out when I was 'his' girl. It was just, well, it ended in seventh year when he suggested a truce. I wouldn't hate him if he stopped asking me out."

Maddy nodded. "And?…"

Lily sighed, "And then we graduated and I haven't seen him since." She looked at her watch and groaned. "I have to run, I'm late."

As Maddy watched her leave she knew Lily was leaving things out of her story, but getting personal details out of Lily was like pulling teeth, wisdom teeth.

AN: As always PLZ R & R. BTW this does take place in England, not America.