JENNIE

The next evening Chahee and I are dining at Hush, a club in East Village. Their roof terrace is filled with a mixture of locals and East Coast millennials who have escaped their parents' homes for the night. We must be at least ten years older than the average crowd here, and I'm glad I dressed casual in jeans and an off-the-shoulder white top as Chahee looks completely out of place in her long, baby pink satin dress. Not that she cares; Chahee likes to flaunt her curves and thrives on being the center of attention. After a stint on a reality TV show—it was short-lived as she got sick of the cameras following her around—she's still regularly photographed on the society pages and is somewhat of a celebrity around here.

"Will you stop flirting with everyone?" I say incredulously when she smiles at another man passing our table. "What's up with you?" She's already made eyes at the DJ and our waiter, who are both in their early twenties.

"Hey, I'm just looking. Nothing wrong with that," she retorts, flicking her hair over her shoulder. "I'm sure Neil looks now and then."

"I'm sure he does, but you're full-on tonight."

"Just a bit of fun," Chahee says with a happy shrug. "I'm so glad to be out with you again and able to talk about saucy stuff without men around. Why was it always the four of us before?" She takes a sip of her white wine and helps herself to a piece of haloumi from the sharing platter between us. Her mood is bouncy and it's infectious.

"Yeah, why was that?" I smile and clink my glass against hers. "I prefer this too."

"So, tell me honestly." Chahee leans in closer. "Was it really as good as you said it was?"

"Yes." I shoot her a smirk and shift in my chair at the familiar flutter of butterflies. "It was mind-blowing." I lean in too and continue in a whisper. "I booked an appointment with my doctor for an STD test, so we don't have to be careful next time. It was her idea."

Chahee's eyes widen. "Next time?"

"Uh-huh." I narrow my eyes at her. "But if you tell anyone, I will kill you."

"Of course," she says, as if that's a given. Her expression turns serious then, and she regards me for long moments. "So, what are you going to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, you like to have sex with women. From what you told me, you prefer women to men, at least one woman in particular. So, are you gay? And if you are, what are you going to do?"

"I don't know." The question is one I've asked myself over and over today. "I don't have to decide now, do I?"

"No, but it's something to think about. Not that it matters if you're gay or straight," she hastily adds. "But if you're sure, you might want to talk to your kids at some point, so they're not totally taken by surprise when mommy suddenly starts dating a woman."

"But… I can't imagine myself dating a woman," I say.

"Can you imagine yourself dating a man?"

"No. I suppose that seems unlikely too now." I groan and bury my face in my hands. "Oh God, Chahee, what am I going to do?"

"Chill out. This can be our secret for as long as you want. But I think you're panicking and turning this into a way bigger deal than it is. Lots of people are gay."

"Like who?" I ask. "In our circles I mean."

"Our circles could do with a little diversity; I think it would be welcomed. Besides, this is the Hamptons. It's not like you're living with your mother in Beirut."

Chahee's words flood me with dread. "Please don't remind me of my mother. She wouldn't survive if she knew."

"She doesn't have to know, ever. How often do you see her?"

"Only about twice a year, and I usually visit her. She says her cats get upset if she leaves her home for longer than a couple of nights." I roll my eyes. "Her twelve cats. Even though they have their own housekeepers who tend to their every need."

"Her big, fluffy Persian cats. I've seen them, I follow them on Instagram." Chahee laughs. "Ruby is my favorite. The white one with the grumpy face."

"They all have grumpy faces," I say, laughing along. "She just had personalized four-poster mini-beds made for all of them. It's totally ridiculous."

"Well, there you go, saved by the cats. It's not like she's going to show up unannounced. And your uncle, that mega rich guy, isn't he gay? You said he has a male companion who follows him everywhere and I saw those pictures of you and him on his yacht; he does look a little camp."

"Yes, I'm pretty sure he's gay, but he'd never openly admit to that."

"But everyone suspects he is, right? And he never married?"

"No. He's still single at fifty. I think my family knows; it's just not mentioned." I sigh and take a long drink. "Enough about me. I don't want to think about any of this, it's making me anxious."

Chahee smiles at me and refills my glass. "Of course. Let's just dish some dirt."

"I've got some juicy gossip for you," I say, oddly relieved that my ex-husband has given me something to take my mind off Lisa for a moment. "Guess who's having a baby?"