LISA
Fuck. Why? I wasn't meant to do that. My knuckles turn white from clasping the steering wheel so hard my hands hurt. Fuck. Now I've messed up her life completely. Jennie's expression as her daughter walked in on us will never leave my mind, and neither will Ella's gasp of disgust and utter shock. I knew there was a risk we wouldn't be able to keep our hands off each other, but I hadn't anticipated this.
Now she'll have to explain something to her daughter that she probably doesn't even understand herself. She'll have to explain why she was having sex with the pool woman on the kitchen counter and with that, there will be many, many questions she hasn't even had the time to reflect on.
"Fuck!" I curse, this time out loud, and slow down so my driving at least is less reckless than my behavior. What I did was selfish and stupid. I cancelled my client tonight because I couldn't imagine sleeping with anyone but her, and then I showed up at her house and acted like some horny teenager. And then her daughter walked in. Her daughter of all people.
I didn't go there with the intention of doing what I did. I wanted to apologize, talk to her so there wouldn't be any awkwardness between us. But then I saw her and all my restraint evaporated. No woman has ever made me behave out of character and make me loose myself like this. I have to get Jennie out of my mind and the only way to do that, is to cut all ties. I instruct my phone to call the Pool Masters office, and impatiently wait for someone to pick up. Luckily, it's Sam who I've known for years.
"Hey, Sam, it's Lisa here."
"Hey there. You okay?"
"Yeah. I was wondering if you could do me a favor. It's about the morning shifts I've taken over from Barry."
"Okay, what can I do for you?"
"Well, I know I said I was happy to do it, but the sitter told me the long days are too much for her. Do you think you could find someone else?"
"Oh." Sam pauses and I can hear tapping noises. "Let me have a look… Okay, we have options here. I can make some calls, but I can't promise anything. It should be okay, though; I'll get back to you."
"Thanks, Sam. You're a lifesaver. I'll talk to you later," I say, putting on a cheery voice. After hanging up, I call Hamptons' Escorts and I'm greeted by Jihyo, who sounds a little stressed.
"Hey, hun. It's Friday night and I'm really busy. Do you mind calling back later?"
"This will only take a minute," I say, getting straight to the point. "Will you take me off the system, please?"
"For tonight? I already took you off this afternoon when you asked me to," she answers impatiently.
"No, I mean, could you take me off entirely?"
"What?" She hesitates. "You mean you're not going to see out your three months?"
"No. I'm done." A sting of unease hits me when I realize I'm giving up my main source of income, but I simply can't keep doing this. First Mrs. Ashworth, and now this. It's becoming too much, too complicated, aside from the fact that I feel like I'm cheating on someone I'm not even in a relationship with and never will be. I'm angry with myself for letting it come this far, for doing the one thing I always promised myself I wouldn't: falling for a client.
"Babe, are you okay?" Jihyo's voice softens.
"I'm fine, just get back to your calls, we can talk later."
"No way. My bestie just quit out of the blue and I want to know why."
Frustration takes over and I slam my hand on the steering wheel. "Because I messed up, okay? I went to Jennie's house and I fucked her in the kitchen and her daughter walked in on us. You should have seen the look on her face." I pause and shake my head. "I can't do this anymore, Jihyo. I'm getting invested, and it feels too emotional now."
"Oh, babe." She sighs. "Are you sure?"
"Yes. Everything has changed; I had a good thing going but I know I won't enjoy the work anymore. I'm going to focus on setting up my new company for a while. I need a break." I need to get over Jennie. "Please cancel all my standing appointments too. I'm sorry if that gives you any trouble."
"No, no, I'll deal with it right away." She clears her throat. "It's going to be okay, babe. Just breathe. Can we meet up tomorrow?"
"Yeah. I'll pick you up for the market. Same time as usual," I say, and try to breathe steadily before I hang up.
Oh God, I've done it. I've taken the leap. My life now lays dauntingly uncertain ahead of me and I have no idea if my business will take off or not. Having something to fall back on was easy. Too easy maybe. But still, it was what I needed with Lily. It's time to focus and network now and forget about women altogether. If I stay busy enough, I'll be able to stop thinking about her and she'll forget about me too. Maybe this was the push I needed. It's better this way.