AN: This story is based on the song "Cry To Me" originally recorded by Solomon Burke. I also took partial inspiration from the scene in Dirty Dancing that employs the aforementioned song. Slight Merthur and ambiguous time setting as per usual. All I'l give you is that Arthur is king and there is no past or present Arwen. Enjoy :)

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"Cry To Me"

"Umph!" cried Elyan as he was run into from behind by a speeding figure in a knight's cloak.

"Somewhere to be, mate?" Gwaine called at the barreling individual that continued to stomp his way down the castle hall.

The cloak then flipped around to the baffled knights, revealing himself as the currently enraged King Arthur clad in only his day clothes and cloak. "Have either of you seen Merlin?" he said curtly. Gwaine looked inquisitively at his patrol partner. Elyan threw him a shrug as he held his battered shoulder. The roguish knight gave the king an up-and-down glance.

"Can't say we have, but I'd be avoiding your wrath, too. What's got your breeches in a twist, princess?"

Arthur's scowl deepened. "This is the fourth evening this sennight that he's just been… missing! You'd think by now he'd start taking his job more seriously!" He paused to rein in his anger. "Do either of you have any idea where that fool could be?" he seethed.

"You've checked with Gaius?" Elyan asked.

"Obviously," Arthur fumed.

It was Gwaine's turn to scowl. "Calm down, you asked for the help, mate."

Arthur's stony expression cooled some with guilt from his outburst. "I'm sorry, Sir Elyan, but I've checked all of the usual places. I've checked his room; he's not there. I've asked Gaius; he hasn't seen him since this morning. I've even checked the tavern! Twice! He's nowhere to be found."

"Well maybe you should check the unusual places; our Merlin is nothing if not unusual… and wily," Gwaine proposed. Elyan tilted his head and quirked his lower lip in assent.

Suddenly the gears began to turn in Arthur's head and he was once again barreling just below a jog down the corridor.

"You're welcome!" the long-haired knight called after the king. No response was heard.

"Cry To Me"

After trekking up his third abandoned turret of the night, Arthur opened the door at the top of the structure and gazed around. Gwaine had a point with Merlin being an evasive man. No one would expect Merlin to hide in the abandoned parts of the castle. Well no one except Arthur, who knew his manservant well enough to predict his unpredictable patterns of evasion. He also knew that Merlin quite preferred a quiet view when he was doing his brooding. Thus the first thing he noticed upon opening the door was the view. The citadel was mostly quiet and placid save for some children being pulled inside by parents. Some of his knights were milling about on patrol. A few lanterns were lit inside and outside homes. The Sun had set only a quarter of a candlemark ago, so the sky was a woeful amber. His kingdom was breathtaking. It sobered and tamed his temper.

The second thing he noticed was a distinctly Merlin shaped figure.

The furtive man was perched carefully on the edge of the turret in one of the spaces made for archers. The turret itself had been blown open a few years ago by the dragon that had attacked Camelot, so the space was far wider than it ought to be. Merlin was unmoving with just his legs hanging over the edge of the stone. Arthur didn't know what to make of the sight, but he was quickly tuned into the atmosphere Merlin had created. He saw fit to sit beside Merlin and observe the dusk.

Merlin, for his part, only noticed his companion once he was bending down to sit on his right. He startled so hard he might've fallen if Arthur hadn't tugged him back by the hem of his tunic. He looked at his king bewildered. Before Merlin could ask about his sudden presence, Arthur spoke.

"Thought I might find you up here," he paused, "well, maybe I didn't at first. Yet here you are, avoiding your chores and keeping this view all to yourself." He took his eyes away from the citadel and gave Merlin a look. "Tell me, have you been spending the past nights up here instead of attending to your king?"

Merlin stammered quietly, "I-I… I'm sorry, sire. I'll go and finish my chores right away." He quickly turned his face away from view and made to stand up.

Arthur swiftly moved to grab the squirrely man again. "Sit," he said with more amusement than anything.

Merlin reluctantly got situated again, still keeping his face away from his companion. Arthur's amused stare turned into a bemused one as a breeze made itself known. His friend wasn't even dressed in his usual brown coat. He was missing his characteristic neckerchief as well. His bare alabaster skin made him look much younger in the chill. It was odd considering the weather was currently between winter and spring. The temperature had still refused to rise any higher than jacket weather, which showed in Merlin's trembling shoulders. It was why Arthur had donned his cloak before pursuing his missing manservant - in case he had need of travelling outside (which he did to get to the tavern) in his search.

Seeing the rising intensity of Merlin's trembling, Arthur decided to pull Merlin towards him. Gently, he gathered the end of his cloak with his left hand, then used it to grasp Merlin's upper arm and bring him closer. Merlin resisted at first, but eventually gave in and sidled next to Arthur within the snug knight's cloak. The cloak was warm, but the body heat coming from the king himself was warmer. However, the shivering only increased in severity, and Arthur tried to catch Merlin's eyes to no avail.

"Merlin…?" Arthur pressed lightly.

The quivering manservant finally turned his face to the heated body beside him. The pools in his eyes were undeniable, yet Arthur could see Merlin was adamantly keeping them from spilling over. It was as if Merlin didn't want to show his weakness. Arthur was - in truth - only half surprised. Merlin had been pulling back from him all week. The quips were brief and few and the work he hadn't managed to dodge was done quickly enough for him to skirt away with minimal conversation. Merlin could be a bleeding heart, but he'd hardly ever come weeping to Arthur with personal issues.

"What's wrong?" Arthur said in a breath.

Merlin only averted his eyes again and bit his lip with some force. He was visibly battling to keep the tears in place. It was as if letting them fall admitted something he hadn't wanted to share. Arthur knew whatever it was wasn't to be suffered alone; it was wearing on Merlin like stone. That couldn't continue. Arthur squeezed Merlin's side with the cloak and leaned even farther into the other man. He grew more concerned as Merlin simply stiffened in response. Arthur's frown deepened.

"You know you can tell me anything, you idiot," he said endearingly. "Talk to me, Merlin. Why are you up here? Why are you avoiding people? Why are you avoiding me? Talk to me."

He reached his right hand up to turn Merlin to him by the chin. "Cry to me."

At that Merlin reached around and melted into Arthur's warmer frame. He clung to the king in a tight embrace and shook violently with gasping - but otherwise silent - sobs. Arthur wrapped his arms and cloak around his friend in an attempt to comfort him, but also keep him from teetering off the ledge. His shoulder grew wet as Merlin continued his quiet bawling. His own eyes became wet in response to the utter despair emanating from his manservant. The gasping breaths had eventually slowed just enough to let Merlin speak.

"I'm just -" another sharp intake, "I'm just so tired of the lies," and that was all he could say before he began to shake once more.

"Lies?" Arthur questions. "Who's been lying to you Merlin?"

"Nobody!" Merlin inhales sharply. "That's just it… it's me; I'm lying," he buries his face further into Arthur's shoulder. "I'm so tired of lying!"

It comes out as a shout-whisper that lands a blow somewhere deep in Arthur's chest. Of all the times he'd heard his manservant cry - scarce though the incidences were - he'd never sounded so…

Broken. Helpless. Defeated.

There was only one thing Arthur knew of that'd make Merlin this distraught.

"Is this about the magic?"

Merlin went rigid in Arthur's arms and immediately pulled back to inspect his king with wide, roving eyes. He began to stammer out an excuse before Arthur stopped him.

"Relax, Merlin. I've known for quite some time now; I'm not going to arrest you," he said with a brief, reassuring smile. "I was going to wait and let you tell me, but if it's causing you this much grief there's no point. You needn't worry about it anymore. I'm not angry… well, not anymore," he trailed off. Seeing the horrified look in Merlin's eyes, he pulled him back into his arms.

He wrapped the cloak again around Merlin's left side and used his right hand to pull Merlin back to his shoulder by the neck. He tenderly played with the short, curly hairs at the back of his friend's neck in an oddly affectionate manner. He waited until the muscles in Merlin's neck relaxed, then spoke again.

"I felt betrayed at first because you'd lied to me. You felt like you couldn't trust me, but I already trusted my life in your hands. I may have had too much pride in the past to admit that I owe you. You've saved my life countless times before even without magic. But over time, I realised that nothing's changed. I saw you protect me - protect the knights and others - with magic. Yet you never once sought any credit. I don't care that you have magic; you're still you - stubborn and dense though you are. I still trust you with my life, Merlin. God knows what would become of me if I hadn't. You truly are the bravest of all of us… and only now do I know it." Arthur pulled Merlin far enough away to look into his wide, wet eyes.

He continues feebly, "I hope you can learn to trust me in the same way. I hope you can trust me enough to confide in me - to cry to me."

More tears rushed from Merlin's eyes, but his lips slowly curled into the smallest of smiles. It was indeed small, but sincere - a glimpse of the normal Merlin. He mouthed the apology that he couldn't find the air to speak. Arthur just smiled and had Merlin rest his head in the crook of his neck.

They watched as the sky turned several shades before deciding on a deep blue.

Arthur felt a shift in the jaw resting on him, and a firefly appeared before him. It twinkled and danced patterns in the air in front of them before landing on Arthur's knee. He then saw a glimpse of shimmering gold from the body next to him and another firefly joined the other in a dance into the night.

Arthur raised an amused brow down at his warlock, who returned a sly smile in kind. His red-rimmed eyes glanced once, then twice at Arthur's lips before the king made his move for him. The kiss was soft and fleeting, but spoke a million volumes never put into words by the pair before.

"I trust you," Merlin said gingerly. "I trust you, Arthur."

Arthur hummed in assent, burying his nose in Merlin's hair.

"Thank you. Now maybe you'd like to come out of the cold? As much as the view is great, the breeze is more of a wind now and my cloak won't do much for us soon."

"But I was just getting warm," Merlin pouted, leaning up into the contact.

"Yes, but I'm sure you'll find my bed far warmer. After all, I can't leave you to freeze tonight in that threadbare cot of yours," Arthur said cheekily.

Merlin removed his head from Arthur to look up at him incredulously. Arthur took the opportunity to stand up.

He held his hand out for Merlin to take. "C'mon, don't you trust me?" he grinned teasingly.

Merlin smiled. It was something he hadn't done for a long time now. He was so worn out from lying to the one man he trusted and loved above all others. But now that the weight was relieved from his body, he swiped at his eyes and took Arthur's hand.

"Cry To Me"