Xie Lian was now thirty-nine years old. His hair was now unkempt and on the long side, to shoulder-length. He usually had his hair up in a bun or a half bun, or a ponytail. He should cut his hair short for his once-every-three-years haircut soon.
Perhaps he was asexual, he never quite felt aroused by anyone, so he stayed single and had no children. He still played with the children from the orphanage—or rather, group home as he learned the proper modern terminology later—he used to donate to, anyway, and that was enough for him. In fact, he worked there. Perhaps he's been single for this long because he only made enough money to support himself, and in his social circle full of similarly poor women, no one wanted to consider him as a partner. Everyone used to tell him how handsome he was in his youth, but he looked rather different now (for the better, Xie Lian thought, as he shuddered at the memory of being too famous for his own comfort back in the day), and he didn't think that he was particularly handsome. Just a plain, close-to-middle-age man who helped take care of the children at the group home for very little money. The children there ranged in age between seven to seventeen, so they were too young to remember who Xie Lian was, thankfully, but some of the teachers and administrators recognized his name, much to his embarrassment. He just told them that he was a recovering drug addict from his celebrity days, who was willing to take any job.
His parents were living much more lavishly and had offered him to live with them until he figured something better out, but he did not want to bother them at this point in his life, so he refused to receive any money from them at all. He received much love and support from them growing up, he hoped that he'd be able to help take care of them if they ever needed him.
What about Xie Lian's own wealth? Right after he resigned from Heavenly Capital Records, his financial advisor recommended that he put all his equity in some kind of a mutual fund, which he did, and he has lived off of the interests earned on that fund ever since. Unfortunately, he had much debt to his record label (the industry standard was that the record label lent money to the artist to spend developing and marketing their music), and he had other debts from living a bit too lavishly at the time (though it was nothing compared to other celebrities), so his total net worth was unfortunately in the tens of millions rather than the hundreds of million people usually thought Xie Lian had. But it was enough for him to earn hundreds of thousands to a few million in interest each year from his fund, and that was more than enough. He also sold his real estate, since he did not care for them at all. He hid the wealth he actually had from his parents for now, because he didn't care to explain why he wasn't using it to live a more decent life.
As expected of a monk. A privileged one at that, he remembered My Qing saying to him while harrumphing about a decade ago, when they reconnected after so many years of not seeing each other. They were hanging out at a coffee shop, one in the suburbs close to where Xie Lian lived. It was in an old building from the 70s, the coffee there tasted mediocre, and there was usually no one else around whenever Xie Lian visited. The privilege of choosing to not spend your money, rather than not having money to spend at all.
Mu Qing used to be his publicist, who also acted as a marketer and agent somewhat. Most publicists would be extremely polite to their client so that they'd have a good reputation in the industry and be able to work with everyone, but Mu Qing tended to have no filter. That worked for him, because Mu Qing was someone Xie Lian recommended Jun Wu to hire himself after seeing his talents, and no one dared to seriously insult Xie Lian's publicist/marketer/agent back then. He gave everyone his mind, and was not scared of regretting what he said later. And he knew who was who in the industry really well–from the journalists and bloggers to indie artists and staff at major labels. He also knew the kind of music that was out there and how much they sold and what venues they tended to perform at. He was very passionate about the music industry. He was rather talented as a singer/songwriter himself, though he had more of an indie feel to his music. Heavenly Capital Records did not hire Mu Qing as a songwriter or sign him as an artist for this reason.
As the years passed by, though, the Internet was becoming more prominent and allowed artists to be their own record label and manage their own marketing, so Mu Qing went on to do just that. With his intimate knowledge of the music industry and the network he developed inside it, he was doing quite well for himself despite being an indie artist. Xie Lian always had the sense that Mu Qing disliked the kind of music Xie Lian was known for, but it wasn't like Mu Qing was the only one who thought that his music was mainstream pop trash, and he was only happy for Mu Qing's success.
Yeah, yeah, if you had the money you'd get the best assistants around, buy the most expensive ass car around, buy a god-damned castle in Europe, yada yada yada, Feng Xin said mockingly next to him. You grew up with nothing with just your single mother who worked two jobs, we heard you the last six dozen times that you mentioned it.
Mu Qing glared at Feng Xin, his hand looking ready to crush his cup of black coffee.
Feng Xin used to be Xie Lian's songwriter. He was one of the very best for the style of music that Xie Lian was known for, but now it seemed that he had changed record labels from Heavenly Capital to this new one called the Ghost City Records. Feng Xin said that he liked how artists were treated better there. To that, Mu Qing thought that no record label was a good record label, that everyone should be an indie artist.
It's all right, Feng Xin, Xie Lian had said with a small smile. I know, I grew up very privileged, Mu Qing, and it is what allows me to choose to live like I am now. I feel perfectly fine with it, no need to worry about me.
Mu Qing now glared at Xie Lian. You! He pointed his index finger angrily. You had us worried! You disappear from us for years, and now you're working at a group home? You didn't even know what those were, you thought you were donating to an orphanage like it was the freaking 50s or something!
Xie Lian raised his hands like he was surrendering to a cop, as if trying to show that he had no weapons in his hands. I know, I've worked there for a few years now, I realize how much I didn't know anything about all this.
Working with the foster kids, huh Xie Lian? Mu Qing said, rolling his eyes. And you tell me not to worry? I might have been a troubled kid in school, but the foster kids I knew were even worse! And you're working with GROUP HOME foster kids?! How are you even managing to last this long?
Feng Xin looked puzzled. What's a group home? And why are you being racist toward foster kids?
Mu Qing glared at Feng Xin at first, but then rolled his eyes and sighed, looking tiredly at him like he wasn't even worth his anger. After working in his group home, Xie Lian could understand Mu Qing's reaction quite a bit, though he admitted there was a time when he was like Feng Xin and had no clue about all this at all.
How dealing with unwanted children, or children who could not be taken care of by their parents or relatives, varied from place to place. For where Xie Lian lived, the government usually tried to place children with relatives if their parents were either dead or not fit to raise children. Sometimes, that could not be worked out because the relatives were not fit to raise children either, or the children themselves were too mentally disturbed from being raised by their unfit parents, so the relatives could not handle the children. Those children went into foster care until they could be adopted. Younger children tended to get adopted right away, but children older than seven had nearly no chance of being adopted, or so Xie Lian kept hearing from the kids at his group home. And since foster homes are meant to be temporary, and since some foster parents are disturbed people themselves, the children end up moving from city to city, a lot of them far too often. Xie Lian knew too many children who moved twenty-some times in only twelve years of their life. As a result, some of these children grew up with absolutely no semblance of love or connection in their life, and the mental health consequences of that was often severe. The ones who could not stay at a foster home would start living in a group home of maybe around ten or twenty kids, and if they still constantly misbehaved (perhaps they were extremely violent toward the other kids, perhaps they dealt drugs, perhaps they tried vandalized something, etc.), then they would get sent to the group home meant for severely maladjusted kids. The group home that Xie Lien worked at was not too bad in his opinion—he thought that most of the children there were relatively well-adjusted. He did not think that he could handle working in the ones for severely maladjusted kids, though.
In other countries, Xie Lian heard that there were privately run orphanages telling poor parents that they will raise the children well on their behalf for a small fee, then mistreat the children severely to gather as much donations from people sympathizing with the kids as possible, most of which ended up with the owner and not the children. Truly, the world was too depressing for Xie Lian to handle sometimes. He tried to think of the kids at the group home who had said nice things to him, and those who kept in touch with him, and of the many inspiring journalists and activists he followed on social media who tried to bring attention to these issues and try to improve them. Or repeat the mantra, Life is suffering , as he had as a monk. Anything to help keep his peace of mind.
Feng Xin listened wide-eyed to Xie Lian's stories of the extra-disturbed kids he's seen. Fuck, that's fucked. I can come in and volunteer, I have time.
That won't help, they'd hate pretend-do-gooders who won't understand them and who will leave sooner than later like you. You think I'm constantly angry? Try hanging out with them! Mu Qing interjected testily. Drug addict parents think they can raise kids, pop out babies and traumatize them, then these kids end up in the system which traumatizes them even further, if that was possible. Then they turn 18, get dropped like a hot potato with no further help from the system, unlike normal kids who usually get some kind of support through college. They in turn turn into homeless drug addicts popping out future foster kids.
Now now, most foster kids I've met aren't that bad. Besides, we appreciate volunteers at our place, we'd rather have them than not have them, Xie Lian placated. I, uh…
Xie Lian wondered if he should tell them about this thing that would horrify Mu Qing further. Feng Xin would probably be fine with the information.
What? Mu Qing glared at Xie Lian while crossing his arms.
Xie Lian looked guiltily at Mu Qing, making himself small to brace himself from his reaction. You know the fund I talked about? Effectively my retirement account? I donate most of the interest I earn to the group home I work at.
Mu Qing widened his eyes, and dramatically slammed the table and stood up from his chair. I told you that you're too giving, you damn monk! You give to yourself, THEN to others! You fill your own cup before pouring out to others, I don't care how small you think your cup is, it's bigger than you think! How are you going to live in YOUR retirement?! You think you're helping the situation? Your fund won't last forever, at some point this home won't have your money to rely on, and then what? What you're doing isn't sustainable, what you're doing is to set up the system so that only monks like you can work in the system! A system's gotta work for normal people, Xie Lian, a system can't count on friggin' everyone to be a martyr! And you know someone's going to find out and then publish tabloids about what a hypocrite you are by helping just one group home, and a relatively well-off one at that, right? Just pay more in taxes by playing the lottery or something and mind your own damn business!
I know there's all that to consider, but hey I pay for these kids' college or trade schools should they wish to go to one, Xie Lian defended himself. We have one staff member for every two kids, a permanent residential assistant—that's me—and the kids get allowances to spend on whatever they wish. We hire a therapist they see every week, and we have people come in to teach anger control and sex education and such. The kids here do relatively well, we've only had minor fights and no teenage mothers in the years I was here, and the social workers clamor to place their kids here.
Feng Xin nodded, looking impressed. See? Xie Lian has it handled, it sounds like. You're too negative, Mu Qing, most things aren't as bad and impossible as YOU think.
Mu Qing's face twitched as he sat down. Maybe this is unfair to all the other foster kids. Maybe you should help the parents more so that the kids don't end up in the system in the first place, most of these kids' parents wouldn't be so bad if they had money.
I know, I wish that I had more money to help everybody, Xie Lian replied. But this is the help I know how to give, for now, and it's working relatively all right. Maybe I'll do something else in the future, but I don't want to stop and leave without giving them a way to keep what they have now.
Mu Qing sighed, and muttered, ….All right…
Feng Xin laughed. You're amazing as always, Xie Lian. It's great to hear from you again, let me know how I can volunteer at this place, and maybe add to your fund, though I probably won't contribute as much to this place as you have. He smiled wryly. I've got a lot more ego than you, I like having nice things, at least to the level that my friends have. I can't give up everything I have and put all my money and time into charity the way you do, Xie Lian.
Xie Lian smiled. No worries, that's normal, I'm the weird one here… For volunteering, the kids could always use more one-on-one contact with people, and if you could commit long term that would be even better. They really lack having a meaningful relationship in their life.
Mu Qing was silent, then muttered, Maybe I have some money to spare for your fund, too… Maybe I have time to volunteer a bit… See how it turns out…
Xie Lian smiled even wider.
Xie Lian was strolling through a grocery store to buy some supplies for the group home in a hoodie and jeans, his hair up in a bun, while the kids were in school. He had his cell phone ready in case anyone, staff or child, needed him. The facility had a cook come in every morning to cook all meals for them, so Xie Lian did not need to buy any groceries. He tossed snacks, fruits, medicine, toothpaste, and such into his grocery cart—and some tampons, pads, condoms—the pregnancy tests they had were going to expire soon, it was time to buy more of those, too…
As he strolled along, he came across the magazines section, where he saw some celebrity gossip magazines. Although he didn't miss being a celebrity, he did miss performing for his fans a bit. He saw that an artist called the Wind Master was very popular these days—the Wind Master was really well known for his? Her? Their? Androgyneity. The Wind Master apparently said in interviews that they didn't really care what pronouns people used for them, so Xie Lian went with what most people used for their pronoun, which was they/them/theirs. The Wind Master had a male body—according to interviews, they personally never felt a strong need to transition, but they always liked to wear women's clothing, and boy did they look beautiful when presenting as a woman. They managed to look handsome when presenting as a man, as well. Not only that, but they could sing as a man and a woman—their voice was something else. The Wind Master wowed everybody with a new kind of music that was both masculine and feminine, singing a range like no one else, and their costume changes in one song for both their male and female forms were extremely entertaining. They apparently used to be part of Heavenly Capital Records, but now belonged to Ghost City Records, which apparently caused other prominent artists to either switch to Ghost City Records or even to start there.
How did Ghost City Records become so prominent in a relatively short amount of time? Its CEO and founder liked to keep a low profile, so he never appeared in interviews or had his pictures taken anywhere. Xie Lian had been busy with the children, so he just never asked Feng Xin even though he worked there. Xie Lian decided to ask Feng Xin the next time they met. Ghost City Records was very, very small when Xie Lian heard about it from Feng Xin the first time.
Xie Lian decided to stop dawdling and move forward, then he saw that there was a tall, lanky man with an eye patch over his right eye in front of him, his hair and eyes dark. He looked like he was in his early thirties, and was wearing a red blazer over a black dress shirt and black skinny jeans, with a flashy butterfly-shaped earring on one ear. He stood out quite a bit in the middle-of-nowhere suburbian grocery store Xie Lian was in.
Hold on, Xie Lian thought to himself as he couldn't help but stare at the flashy red man in front of him a little bit, as others in the grocery store did. He looks familiar…
The flashy red man turned in Xie Lian's direction. Xie Lian felt ashamed at staring at him for a bit too long, and was getting mentally ready to be berated for it, but the man flashed a brilliant smile and said happily, "Gege!"
Xie Lian remembered. The boy with one missing eye from the group home, from nearly two decades ago! One of the ones Xie Lian invited to come watch his concert, that he spent a little bit of time with when he volunteered!
What was his name again?
A/N: Gosh, when I started googling "orphanage experience" like an idiot, I completely underestimated how bad the current foster care system is in the US. I hope that I gave the topic some justice, but I totally understand if you want to yell at me for not giving the topic the consideration it needs! I unfortunately don't fully understand how group homes work, but this is written based on what I understand of it, which is why I never mention which country Xie Lian and his gang live at, unfortunately. So in a way, it's a modern AU set in a parallel universe Earth, because what I described is likely not accurate enough to describe any country's system accurately on this Earth. Same for whatever I've managed to research about the music industry.
Inspiration for Shi Qingxuan not caring what pronoun gets used comes from Audrey Tang's Wikipedia page.