Chapter 6:

The next couple weeks went by uneventful as far as Stabler and I. We were all business while working on various cases and did not discuss anything about the incident on the stakeout. El and I were then asked to go undercover as a rich married couple attending a high-end auction and things became awkward again. The man who ran the auction was suspected of human trafficking, so El and I were needed to get close to the guy and get proof that he was involved in buying and selling young women. This auction was being held at a 5-star hotel in Manhattan, so the task force rented two rooms, one for surveillance and one for El and I to set up base camp. Undercover operations are usually exciting for me with getting to play a different character and take down the perp after its all done, but this operation had my anxiety through the roof. I was worried about staying focused on the task knowing I was going to be next to Elliot all night. Just being near him caused a burn in my core and I couldn't think about anything else but being with him.

El and I changed in one of the rooms while the other room was being set up with surveillance equipment and making sure all the audio and video was working. I put on a strapless black sequin dress with a slit over the left leg and black high heels. I came out of the bathroom and found Elliot in a tuxedo looking amazing. My heart started to beat faster, and I felt my breath catch on seeing him. This was going to be way harder than I thought. I felt like I needed a cold shower already and we hadn't even gotten started. I noticed him staring at me and I could feel those blue eyes looking me up and down. He finally uttered, "Wow, Liv, you look amazing. You are absolutely stunning." I felt my cheeks blush a little, cleared my throat, and said, "Thanks, you look great too." We checked in with Finn and Rollins to make sure our audio was good and El had a hidden camera in his tuxedo for visual. We then headed downstairs to the ballroom where the auction was being held.

I took a seat near the stage to look like just another attendee while El went to find the person his confidential informant told him about to inquire about a "special" auction. I kept an eye on him the whole time and notice him talking very seriously to another man who was tall, had jet-black hair, a goatee and dark brown eyes. Suddenly, they both turned and were walking out of the ballroom. I could hear their conversation in my earpiece, and El was being brought to a different room for VIP members only. I followed close behind but made sure no one saw me. There was a small room in the basement that El entered, but I could not see into the room. The door was then shut, and I could only listen to the audio. I held my position near the room until I was given the go ahead to bust this "special" auction wide open. I could hear various girls being brought out onto stage and being auctioned off like cattle. It was sickening and my stomach felt queasy. My nerves were fried, and I just wanted to bust through the door right now. After being held hostage with Lewis, I couldn't help but think about what these girls were having to endure. I took some deep breaths to try and stop me from spiraling and to stay focused on the job. I finally heard the code word from El which sent the SWAT team in to take these perps down. We arrested several people directly involved in human trafficking and rescued 15 girls being held captive.

El and I headed back up to the room to change clothes and remove all the surveillance equipment. I was standing at the dresser removing my earrings and necklace. I could feel his eyes staring at me from behind and his presence behind me was electric. Suddenly, his hand was on my lower back, and he was right up against me. He bent down and said right next to my ear in a hushed tone, "That dress is breath taking. Do you need any help with the zipper?" I swallowed hard and found myself unable to respond. I could feel wetness forming in my black lace panties after feeling his warm breath on my neck and the firmness of his body up against mine. I was able to utter, "Sure," and that was it. My whole body was burning with desire, and I could think of nothing else but going to bed with him. There is a magnetic pull between us when we are in the same room, and I have never had that with anyone else.

He pulled the zipper down on the back of my dress and then I turned to face him. I looked up into a sea of blue eyes and he leaned down and kissed me hard. I instantly opened my mouth to let him in. I was hungry for more. I wanted all of him and I didn't care about him being married. Our tongues explored each other's mouths and I let my dress fall to the floor. He pulled back to look at me in just my black lacy bra and thong underwear. I could see the desire in his eyes to devour me and it only made me want him more. I walked backwards and laid down on the bed. He moved quickly and was on top of me. He gently massaged my breasts with one hand and grabbed my ass with the other. I let out a muffled groan of pleasure and he smiled. "Liv, I want you and I need you now. I want to show you how much I love you." I reached up, placed my hands behind his head and pulled him into a deep kiss. I could feel how much he wanted me from the rock-hard bulge in his pants pushing into my thigh.

I started unbuttoning his dress shirt and he started unbuckling his belt and removing his pants. Both of us were almost frantic with desire and couldn't move fast enough to get his clothes off. His big strong hands were moving up and down my sides igniting a fire in between my legs. He then placed his hand underneath the lacy band of my panties and began massaging in between my folds. I let out a moan and he whispered in my ear, "Liv, you are so wet. You have no idea what it does to me to know that I am the reason for it." He rubbed and massaged my clit which sent pulses of pleasure through me causing me to be dizzy. I reached over and grabbed his cock to massage it and I heard his breath catch and he uttered, "Fuck, Liv, that feels so good." He then slipped two fingers into me all the way to that special spot and moved in and out with ease. I couldn't believe how good it felt and then I had the urge to feel him inside of me. I needed him in me right then, right now. I sat up and removed my bra and slipped my underwear off. I pushed him onto his back and straddled him. My breasts were hanging just above his face, and he lifted his head to suck on one of them and I groaned with pleasure. I then grabbed his cock and guided him inside me. He slid in easily since I was pouring with wetness at the need for him. He grabbed my hips and helped move me up and down on him and I could feel me tightening around him. I was close to orgasm after only a couple minutes probably due to all the pent-up sexual tension between us for so long. Suddenly, I exploded with pleasure, and I was pulsing on his rock-hard member. I then felt him release inside of me and another wave of pleasure came over me. I then collapsed on the bed next to him panting out of breath. "El, that was amazing." He responded, "Yeah, that's an understatement." We both wanted to lie there forever in each other's arms, finally content and satiated, but we needed to get dressed and get out of there since this was supposed to be all business. We both hesitantly got out of bed and got changed into our casual clothes. We walked out of the room, both smirking at each other over what had just happened.

I went into work the next day happier than I had been in a while. I know it was wrong what El and I did but it felt so right. I was conflicted and didn't want to hurt Kathy, but I realized that I was over the top in love with El. As I was finishing up paperwork piling up on my desk, I noticed that El hadn't arrived at work yet. This was odd since he was almost always here before me, and I hadn't heard from him that he wasn't coming in. Cragen came out to my desk and told me that El decided to take some time off for personal reasons and would be out for about a week. I tried to hide the complete shock on my face and just said, "Oh ok, thanks for letting me know Captain." What personal reasons did El need time off for? What did this mean? Was I just a one-night stand and he was taking time off to work things out with Kathy? Or maybe he was going to break things off with her after what we did last night? I sent him a quick text, "Everything ok? I am still recovering from last night. (wink emoji)" He never responded to my text and I went home that day wondering what was going on. I started to feel ashamed and queasy about what we did rather than content.

Two full weeks went by, and I had not seen or heard from El. I was livid with him. How could I be so wrong about our relationship? I loved him and he told me he loved me, but how could he just abandon me like that? Cragen then stuck his head out of his office and summoned me in. I went in and shut the door. I had been called into his office lots of times and none of the conversations were usually good. He looked me straight in the eye and said, "Olivia, I need to tell you something. I am not sure what happened between the two of you and I don't want to know. I must tell you that El put in his papers. He is leaving SVU and NYPD all together. He didn't give me a reason but said that he had to get far away from New York and was leaving with his family." I suddenly felt like I had been punched in the chest. My throat felt like it was closing in and I couldn't breathe. He left me without even a fucking word. I laid down my walls and allowed him in and he literally screws me. I just looked at Cragen and said, "Ok, thanks for letting me know." He asked me if I was ok and I said, "Yeah, I'm fine." I wasn't fine though. I was nowhere near fine. I walked out of his office and walked into the nearest bathroom. I grabbed the wall and just started to cry. How could he do this to me? We had been partners for 14 years and he just walked out of my life like we were strangers. I felt myself spiraling and suddenly felt nauseous. How can I trust anyone again if I couldn't trust the one person who always had my back? I always felt safest with him, and we had been through more shit than most partners. My heart literally felt like it was being torn from my chest, and I had to get out of there. I texted Cragen that I was taking a sick day and went home. I know I had to find a way to move on and cope with this, but it would take a while. (about ten years and counting…)

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