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Tomorrow is Another Day

As soon as Ponyboy opened his eyes the next day, he knew it was the same. He wasn't sure exactly how he knew…maybe it was that his hands didn't hurt, and there was no gauze on his head. Or maybe it was just that he woke up in the exact same position with the exact same headache as the day before.

The clock told him it was just after six, just like every other morning, but this time, he had a plan. It wasn't a plan that made a whole lot of sense, but it was the only thing he could think of. He'd wanted to fix this…that was what he'd thought when Dally had died. He'd been sick and exhausted, but he'd also been thinking that all he wanted was to go back and fix all this. Dally had died because of him. Johnny too. They were both dead because he'd fought with Darry…because he'd run off and because he hadn't been able to fight Bob off on his own. Because he'd run into that church. Johnny had saved him. Daly had hid them. Neither of them deserved to die because of him.

Besides, how could any of them survive without Johnny and Dally? How could Ponyboy look his brothers or their (remaining) friends in the face knowing that he was the reason Johnny and Dally were dead? He couldn't. Bad enough Darry had to give up on college to raise him. Bad enough he couldn't get along with his oldest brother half the time. But this…this was something he somehow got the chance to fix. He just had to figure out how.

So Ponyboy got out of bed the moment he opened his eyes, throwing some clothes on and grabbing a stray sheet of paper from his desk along with a pencil and a few of the coins he'd dropped there at some point. It was the same day, but that didn't mean he had to do the same things. He doubted Darry would be too happy with him for running off, but he hoped that the note would smooth things over…besides, did it even matter when this day might not even be real? If he had to do it all over again, his brothers would forget all this anyway.

He'd finished the day before in a trance, walking home from the bus stop without talking to Cherry, maybe avoiding a few more punches in the rumble, and sitting in the corner of Darry's bedroom while they all ran off to watch Dally die, all while knowing that he hadn't done anything but spend a little extra time with Johnny. And sure, it was good to spend more time with his friend, but that wasn't going to save him! He didn't think reading a book together would save him either, but it wasn't like he had any better ideas. It had sounded good when he'd first thought of it, but now, as he scribbled out a note to his brothers explaining that he'd gone to see Johnny, Pony felt pretty dumb.

Then again, he hadn't ruled out the insane or stuck in a coma theories, so maybe it didn't matter.

He rode the bus across town, keeping his head down until he reached the stop closest to the hospital, then found the closest corner store where they might have a copy of Gone with the Wind. He didn't know which store Two-Bit had gone to, but he got lucky on his first try, and bought the book before hurrying to the hospital. Part of him wanted to try and just sneak into Johnny's room since he knew which one it was, but the last thing he needed was for one of those big guys in white kicking him out, so he went up to the nurse's desk and tried to look friendly.

"Hi. I'm Ponyboy Curtis. I'm here to see Johnny Cade."

The woman gave him a surprisingly sympathetic look, but shook her head. "I'm sorry. He's in the intensive care unit, so he can't have any visitors at the moment."

"Please…ma'am, I swear, I won't be any trouble. I was in that fire with him and…and we were reading this book together." He held it up, feeling his eyes heat up at the thought that he might have to do all of this again the next day…that he'd somehow have to make it through this day again without even seeing his best friend. Vaguely, he thought he should maybe be embarrassed to be almost-crying in front of this strange woman considering he was a greaser and all, but something about begging to see your dying best friend for the third day in a row kind of took the shame out of it. "I just want him to finish it before…" He swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. "He saved my life. Please. Just…let us finish the book? Please?"

She hesitated, something in her softening, when the doctor from the last couple of days happened by. "Maddie? Everything alright?"

"This is the young man that was in the fire with those boys…he wanted to see Johnny Cade."

Pony watched the doctor take him in, from his red-rimmed eyes to the new book he was clutching, before he nodded.

"I see. Well, I can't see any harm in it. Come with me, son. I'll show you where his room is."

"Thank you, sir!" Ponyboy didn't bother mentioning that he already knew where Johnny's room was, although he did wonder if this doctor would lock him in the ward for crazy people if he told the truth. Hell, he thought grimly, that was always an option if he couldn't figure anything else out. But before his mind could go anywhere darker, the doctor opened the door to Johnny's room, walking past his friend's bed to open the curtains.

Johnny was the same. Pale and sick looking, with wires going from him to the machines at his side. Pony didn't waste any time, just took a seat by his bed and tried to smile. "Hey, Johnny."

"Pony? Man, what are you doing here?" Johnny asked with a weak grin, voice so hoarse Pony could barely make it out. "What time is it?"

"Almost seven. I left a note for Darry and Soda and came up as soon as I could. You doing okay?"

"Yeah…I'm alright," he lied, and Pony didn't call him out.

"You know they put our names in the paper for saving those kids? They're saying we're heroes." He felt like he was rushing his words…talking too fast and trying to get through the important stuff as quick as he could so they could get to reading. Maybe, he thought, if he finished the book, it would all be fixed! He couldn't help getting his hopes up…couldn't help imagining the next day happening all of a sudden, with Johnny and Dally okay and out of the hospital.

"Man…we ain't heroes," Johnny said with some difficulty, coughing on the last word. "We're greasers."

Pony shrugged. "Maybe we're both," he told him softly, clutching the book hard, and Johnny gave him a long look. He didn't give Johnny a chance to question it though…he had to keep going. They didn't have all that much time! "Look…I brought the book. I thought maybe we could finish it."

His friend nodded, thankfully not asking any questions, although he still looked kind of worried which was ironic considering he was the one dying in a hospital bed. "Yeah. Sounds good."

So Pony opened the book to the last page they'd read at the church, trying not to remember how he'd read it the day before. This time, he had a good hour's head start. So if he read straight through, maybe they could finish! Johnny could hear the end of the story! They'd read it together and then…then he'd be okay? Right? Was this right? Pony didn't know…didn't even know who to ask, or how he could ask without everyone around him sounding insane. So he just forgot about all the rest of it and read the book.

He was pretty sure his friend drifted off for parts of it, but that was fine. Sleeping was good, right? It made you feel better when you were sick! So he let him sleep and read the words on the page until his throat ached and his head ached even worse, especially considering he hadn't taken any medicine before leaving the house. But that didn't matter. He didn't pay any mind the nurses that came in to check on the machines or even the doctor that watched him from the doorway, finally stepping into the room and pouring him a glass of water that Ponyboy didn't touch. He just read.

Ponyboy started sometime right before 7, and at 8:38, he turned to the final page, heart clenching in anticipation until he saw what that last line said. "After all, tomorrow is another day." The words twisted a knife in his chest, the pain so immediate and agonizing that he couldn't catch his breath. Tomorrow is another day? What the hell kind of sick joke was that? What if tomorrow wasn't another day? What if it was all the same?

It didn't matter, he told himself. It was just a book! Besides, he'd done it…he'd finished it! There was a moment of silence between them, that last line seeming to echo in the air. Pony waited, holding his breath, the pain of that last line turning sharper with every second that passed. He'd finished the book…they'd read the whole thing together. So…why wasn't anything happening?

A round spot appeared in the blank space under the final paragraph, and then another. It took three more appearing for him to realize he was crying, and another two for him to close the book, placing it as quietly as he could on the table beside Johnny's hospital bed. When he looked up, Johnny's eyes were closed, chest rising and falling so slowly that for a second, Pony thought he wasn't moving. But then he saw the tear run from the corner of Johnny's eyes down his cheek, soaking into the pillow, and that was all it took to break him.

Pony clamped a hand over his mouth, doubling over and clenching his teeth together so tight it felt like they might crumble. He couldn't stop the tears running down his cheeks or the way his breath caught in his chest, making his shoulders hitch uncontrollably, but he wasn't going to let himself make a sound. Not when it might scare his friend. So he sat there, barely daring to move, gasping for air as quietly as he could, until a hand landed on his shoulder. He looked up, almost ashamed at the thought of Two-Bit catching him crying like this, but it wasn't his buddy…it was the doctor.

He already knew that Johnny was going to die…he didn't think a book could actually save him. But some kind of weird magic had brought him back to this day twice now, so he'd thought maybe that same kind of magic could take him back further! Or make it so that none of this had ever happened! Nothing had happened, though…he'd finished the book and everything was the same and the doctor was looking down at him like he was so sorry, and Pony couldn't take it! He'd have to wait until the next day to even find out if it was going to work!

What if it didn't? What was he supposed to do then?

"Son? Why don't you take a drink? You've been reading for a long time."

Pony figured he must look sick for the doctor to be looking at him like that…or maybe the doctor knew a lost cause when he saw one. Just that thought made Ponyboy shudder and he nodded, taking a long drink of the water the doctor had poured for him almost an hour ago. Using his arm, he wiped his face, trying to make it look like he hadn't just been bawling like a baby, but he doubted he'd be fooling anyone anytime soon.

Johnny opened his eyes then, meeting Pony's tear-filled eyes with his own. "Thanks. It…it was good," he rasped, and Pony had to wipe his face again, just nodding because he knew that if he tried to talk, he'd just start crying again.

Pony went to the bathroom once the doctor left, washing his face and taking deep, steadying breaths. Even getting up had made him dizzy but he tried not to think about it. That didn't matter…all that mattered was whether or not this had worked. He'd just have to wait until the next day…there wasn't nothing he could do. He'd done the only thing he could think of and it could still work! His hopes sounded insane even to him, but he didn't think he had any other choice. So he cleaned himself up and went back into Johnny's room and sat down.

Johnny's eyes were closed again and Pony didn't say anything, not wanting to wake him if he was asleep. It felt good just to sit anyway…made the room spin less. He didn't know what to say to Johnny…didn't know how to make any kind of conversation all of a sudden. Thankfully, though he was saved from trying when Two-Bit showed up a few minutes later.

"Hey there, kids. How you doing, Johnny?" he asked, all smiles, but the look he gave Pony told him that he was in some kind of trouble.

"Hey, man," Johnny greeted with a weak smile, opening his eyes at last.

"What have you two been up to?" He patted Pony on the shoulder before taking the free chair, the tightness around his eyes the only sign of his worry.

"Pony…read that…book," Johnny managed to get out, and Pony pointed to it.

"Gone with the Wind. We were reading it together at the church."

"Yeah? How was it?"

"Real good," Johnny told him, grinning and nodding as best he could.

"That's good to hear. I've been meaning to read that one myself," he joked.

Pony tried to lift his eyebrow and glanced at Johnny before turning to Two-Bit. "You can read?"

Johnny's bark of laughter turned into a coughing fit that left him pale and worse looking than before, but he was smiling, and Pony couldn't quite regret it, even when Two-Bit rubbed his knuckles over his head.

"Don't get mouthy, kid," he warned with no real heat in his voice.

Ponyboy watched his friend talk to Johnny then, promising to bring him hair grease and telling him all about how they were going to rumble. It was the same as before, and just that thought made his stomach turn. No…it was different now. It had to be different! Even if it took until the end of the day for it to change…it had to! Two-Bit didn't seem to notice his distress, thankfully, but it wasn't too long before the nurse poked her head in, announcing that Johnny's mother was once more there to see him.

And Pony closed his eyes, looking away until his friend was unconscious and the nurse was ushering them out, insisting that this was why she hadn't wanted him to have visitors.

Once they were in the hallway, Two-Bit turned to him, disapproving. "You know your brother just about came up here himself. I told him I'd come look after you…what the hell were you thinking, sneaking out like that?"

"I left a note," Pony told him dully, realizing at the last second that to Two-Bit, this was the first time they were seeing each other since that night at the movies. His friend just stared at him, incredulous, but Ponyboy couldn't feel much of anything. It was like reading that book had drained him of everything, and now all he cared about was getting to the next day.

"A note? Ponyboy, they woke up to you gone! They were freaking out…thought you'd run off again!" he hissed, looking around and probably making sure he didn't talk loud enough to get them kicked out. "Hell, Steve had to talk Sodapop out of ditching work to come after you."

He didn't argue anymore. None of it mattered, he thought as the room swayed and his head pounded. Not unless Johnny was okay. If Johnny survived, then he'd deal with the rest of it. If not…if not, then none of this was even real.

Two-Bit just stared at him for a minute, then gripped his shoulder, making Ponyboy realize the room hadn't been swaying…he had. "Kid? You alright?" he asked, pressing the back of his free hand against Ponyboy's forehead. "You feel awful hot."

"I'm gonna head home," Pony told him, not sure what to say or how to explain, but knowing he needed to take some medicine if he was going to fight in another rumble. He didn't want to see Dally…not now. Not when Two-Bit might tell him about Pony coming here real early and reading to Johnny. Then Dally would ask him questions and just the thought of more talking made him want to curl up in a ball.

His friend was quiet for a moment, keeping his hand on his shoulder. Then he nodded. "Yeah…alright. Let's get you out of here."

"You can stay…go see Dally. I can get myself home."

"No way, kiddo. You fall over in the street or something and your big brother will kick my ass." He didn't even grin as he said it, putting an arm around Pony's shoulder as they made their way to the door, pausing when they heard Johnny's mom yelling at a nurse. Ponyboy didn't even stop until she came toward them, pointing a finger and looking at them with nothing but hatred in her eyes. Two-Bit tightened the arm around Pony's shoulders as she approached, but Pony couldn't make himself care all that much.

"You! This is all your fault!"

Too tired to argue this time, Pony just sighed and kept walking, not letting her finish. "Yeah, I know," he told her simply, walking out the front doors, Two-Bit a few steps behind like he was waiting for an attack or something. When his friend caught up, he caught his shoulder again, pulling him to a stop.

"Hey…wait a second!" he urged, stepping in front of him outside the hospital doors. "Jesus, Pony, you look like you're about to fall over."

He felt like it too. He didn't know why he felt worse than before…maybe a combination of reading for so long and crying…not to mention how terrified he was that it was all for nothing…that Johnny would still die and he'd wake up the next day only for it to be the same day all over again. He hadn't taken any medicine that morning either, which couldn't have helped. Either way, he wanted to sit down on the curb and sleep until it was all over. Instead, he let Two-Bit lead him to the bench where they'd waited for the bus twice now. After a moment, his friend spoke up. "She's full of shit, you know that right?"

"What?"

"Johnny's old lady. This ain't your fault, kid."

"Of course it is."

Two-Bit just stared at him, but Pony didn't meet his eyes…just stared out at the street, wishing the bus would hurry up. None of this mattered unless Johnny was okay.

"Ponyboy," Two finally said, gripping his shoulder and shaking him a little. "Hey, look at me," he ordered, sounding older, like Darry, so Pony reflexively obeyed. "This ain't your fault."

He knew arguing wouldn't do any good, but he did it anyway. "I got home late. Fell asleep in the lot. Got into it with Darry." Ponyboy shrugged. The rest, of course, was history.

"So what?" Two-Bit demanded, shaking his head. "That don't mean Darry should have done what he did, you hear? He was so torn up about that he couldn't stand it. I never saw him so upset, Pony. And it don't mean you were looking for Bob Sheldon to try and kill you!"

Dropping his eyes, Pony turned away. "It shouldn't be Johnny in there."

"It sure as hell shouldn't be you either, you hear me?" For the second or third or hundredth time that day, Pony's eyes filled and he had to clench them shut to keep from crying. Two-Bit threw an arm around his shoulders, pulling Pony roughly to his side and lowering his voice. "Pony, this isn't on you, okay?" He sounded desperate, like he was scared of something, only Ponyboy wasn't sure what it was he was so scared of. What was it, Pony wondered, that Two-Bit saw in his face?

"I ran off," he whispered, shrugging and wondering why he was even bothering to have this argument. "I started a fight with Darry and left and…"

"You were on our turf. It ain't like you two wandered over to their side of town. They came here looking for trouble. If you want to blame someone, blame Sheldon for being such an asshole that he'd try to kill a kid over nothing. Or blame Johnny's parents for being so awful he couldn't even go in his own house. But this ain't on you, so don't start thinking that."

Pony didn't believe him. Not really. But the fact that Two-Bit didn't hate him was enough to make him sag in relief against his buddy's side, and Two rubbed a hand on his arm like Soda would before sitting up, the two of them watching the bus pull up.

"Come on. You're going to bed, you hear?"

"Why are you in charge?" Ponyboy asked, trying to grin, and Two ruffled his hair before jumping to his feet and pulling him up.

"I'm older and I'm wiser, that's why."

"You're half right," he muttered, laughing for real when Two-Bit punched his shoulder.

"You sure are mouthy, you know that?" He put a hand on his back then, urging him up the stairs and keeping close like Ponyboy might fall over any minute which, to be fair, felt like it could be true. When they got to their seats, he leaned his head against the cool window and might have gone to sleep except for how the bus kept hitting potholes.

Pony pulled the cord when they got to their stop, forcing himself to his feet when the bus pulled up to the sidewalk. Head pounding, he followed Two-Bit out to the sidewalk, then they made their way back to his house in near silence. He could feel Two-Bit's worry, but there wasn't much he could say to make him feel better. He didn't even know if it had worked…if any of this mattered. If finishing the book hadn't worked…if he had to do it all again the next day, then what did it matter if Two-Bit was worried today? If it hadn't worked, none of this would be real.

Once inside his house, Two-Bit disappeared for a minute, then came back with a pill bottle and a glass of water. He took a couple of pills without complaint, draining the glass of water and suddenly realizing how thirsty he was.

"Go on, kid. Lay down for a while."

Pony didn't argue…didn't even want to. He just wanted to sleep until this day was over. So, kicking his shoes off and curling up under the blankets, he tried to do just that.

It was Darry's voice coming from the living room that woke him from an uneasy sleep sometime later, but he wasn't facing the clock and was too tired to make himself roll over, so he wasn't sure what time it was. "Where's Pony?" he demanded, and Ponyboy wondered briefly why he was upset before deciding he didn't care all that much and just wanted to sleep some more.

"He's in bed," Two-Bit told him, voice a little quieter, but still loud enough for Ponyboy to make out the words. He realized then that he couldn't hear the TV or even the radio. Their house was never that quiet, and it made Pony feel a vague sense of unease he couldn't quite put a finger on.

"Why's he in bed? What happened?" Soda asked, sounding more upset than Pony would have thought, and he wondered if he could fall asleep before his brother came in and tried to make him talk. He didn't want his brothers to be upset, but he also couldn't help wondering if this even mattered. If reading that book to Johnny didn't work, then he'd just have to do it all over again, right?

"Guys…I don't think he ought to be fighting tonight? Something's wrong with him."

"What do you mean?" Soda asked, and Pony pulled the covers up over his head, trying to block out their voices and go back to sleep. He didn't want to deal with this…none of it.

"He's got a fever, and he just about fell over at the hospital this morning when we were leaving."

"What was he even doing there?" That was Darry, voice thankfully a little quieter.

"He finished reading that book to Johnny."

He didn't hear anymore…thankfully he'd finally managed to drift off.

Whoever opened his door was quiet enough that he didn't wake up, but the rush of cool air on his face and cold hand on his forehead did. He jumped, blinking at the familiar sight of his bedroom before glancing up and seeing Darry sitting on the bed beside him. His brother was still in his dirty work shirt, so he figured he couldn't have been sleeping for too long. "What's going on, Pone?" he asked, voice softer than he'd heard it in a long time.

He just shrugged, closing his eyes again and hoping his brother would let him sleep through the rest of this awful day.

"You feeling sick?" he pressed, brushing a hand through his hair.

Ponyboy nodded.

"You feel pretty hot…you want anything to eat? Some soup or something?"

He shook his head and Darry hesitated for a long moment before tucking the blanket under his chin.

"Alright…get some rest."

So he did, not opening his eyes again until Sodapop shook him awake, ignoring his groan of protest and pulling the covers off his head. "Pony? Hey…wake up," he urged, and Pony forced his eyes open, glancing up at his brother and feeling a flash of confusion that Soda's mouth was bleeding before realizing the rumble must have already happened. Honestly, all he could feel was relief that he hadn't had to do that part again. "How are you feeling?"

"Sick," he told him simply, not letting himself think about how close they were…if they were back from the rumble, Johnny was supposed to die soon. Would he know right off that it had worked? Would Johnny start to get better? Or would he wake up the next day and none of this would have happened? He didn't know the rules for any of this!

"Come on…sit up. You've been sleeping for hours. Did you eat anything today?"

Pony had to think about that before shaking his head. Eating hadn't seemed nearly as important as going to see Johnny and then he'd felt too sick to do anything but sleep.

"Alright. I'll get you some soup."

Pony rubbed his eyes, letting Soda get an arm around him and pull him upright, moving one of the pillows so he could sit against it. "You just get back?"

"About an hour ago. We whipped them socs good," Soda told him with a grin, and Ponyboy wished he could feel anything but tired and afraid. What if it hadn't worked? What if the next day was the same? His gin dropped after a minute and instead of going to get the soup, he sat on the bed, putting a hand on his shoulder until Pony looked at him again. "You still tired?"

"Yeah." Not just physically, either. It was a bone deep exhaustion that had him wanting to go back to bed…the feeling that no amount of sleep would ever be enough.

"Darry might need to take you back to the doctor…they looked at you at the hospital, didn't they? Before we got there?"

He had no idea, but he nodded anyway. It had been so many days ago, and he'd been so worried about Johnny…surely the doctors had looked him over, though. He'd been in an ambulance, after all.

"You sure scared me this morning, you know? Darry too."

"Sorry," he muttered, not able to muster up any actual regret, but trying to fake it.

"Two-Bit said you were reading that book to Johnny."

He just nodded, and Soda went quiet for a moment. He could practically hear the questions Soda wasn't asking. Was Johnny okay? Was Ponyboy okay? Did he need to talk? But his brother didn't ask him anything. Instead, he got up and left the room, coming back not too much later with some tomato soup that Ponyboy forced himself to take a couple of bites of. He didn't want to…not really. He just wanted to curl up under the covers and wait for this to be over. But he could only stand seeing Soda upset so much, so he ate a few spoonfuls until he couldn't stomach anymore, then let Soda press the back of his hand to his forehead.

Was Johnny dying as he ate tomato soup in bed? Was Dally already going to the corner store, unloaded gun in hand, ready to die? Had reading a book done anything? Could it? Suddenly, he didn't think so, and Soda must have seen the flash of pain that he couldn't hide because he took the bowl and wrapped his arm around his shoulders, squeezing him in a tight hug.

"Hey, what's the matter?" he asked, sounded worried enough that he might call for Darry, and Pony rolled to his side, face pressed against Soda's shoulders.

"Will you stay?" he asked, knowing he sounded about five years old not caring all that much.

After a moment, he felt Sodapop nod. "Yeah…sure, honey. I'll stay. Get some more rest. We'll get you to the doctor tomorrow if you're still feeling bad, alright?" he told him, scooting down so their heads were resting on the pillows and pulling the blanket up so they were both covered. Tears in his eyes, Pony had to bite his tongue to keep from telling Soda that he was scared there wouldn't be a tomorrow…that none of what he'd done mattered and that it would all happen again…that he was somehow stuck in this impossible day that would never end.

Instead, he closed his eyes and pressed his face into his brother's arm and took deep breaths, praying that he'd wake up the next morning and it would somehow all be fixed…that reading a book to his dying friend had been the answer. That tomorrow really would be another day. It was all he could think about until finally, mercifully, he drifted off to sleep

This time he didn't wake when the phone rang.

Thank you for reading!