It's quiet here, Justin. Your mind is a shattered mess. You blacked out again. Fuck, one year later and we're forced to be back to square one: Being seen as a traumatized, mentally disturbed, depressed lump of shit a victim of their immoral abuse. I can't deal with this shit anymore... You need to get your priorities strai-...
"Justin?" a familiar voice called. "Babe, are you awake now?"
The 23 year old slowly opened his eyes, awakening to the sight of a concerned Tiffany Maye siting next to him.
"Uh... W-What?" he muttered, gaining more consciousness. As he finally came to, he realized that he was not at home, but rather laying in a hospital gown attached to some wires, as well as an IV drop going into his arm.
He knew where he was. This was a familiar spot for him to wake up in since that previous August. Seeing his blonde girlfriend sitting there gave off a strange sense of Deja vu. It seemed as though history had repeated itself.
"So, here we are again." the blondie stated, sounding extremely unhappy.
He glanced at her, having his memories feeling a bit fuzzy.
"What are you talking about?" he asked, unsure of what she had meant by that.
She sighed. "Baby, you overdosed on sleeping pills again. Just like last year. sigh, I knew I should've taken that shit away from you. And I wasn't exactly looking forward to coming back to work THIS early."
He frowned, feeling guilty for what he had happened. Tiffany had just gotten off from work at CC General, so he could imagine what it would be like in her shoes: coming home from work to unwind, only to immediately drive back and take care of her struggling boyfriend.
"I'm sorry, Tiffany." he apologized, sounding on the verge of shedding tears.
The blondie shook her head. "It's fine. You just..."
She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and gathered her thoughts.
"I just wish I would've paid more attention to you." she stated. "After what I saw last week, I knew this was probably gonna happen sooner or later."
He frowned again, knowing that this was still partially his fault. If only I didn't overdose again, I wouldn't be such a burden to her right now.
The look on JD's face gave off so much hurt. Noticing it, Tiffany then scooted closer to him, gently holding his hand. It seemed pretty clear that she was genuinely concerned with her partner's mental health.
"H-How did it get THIS bad?" she muttered, sounding like she was about to shed a few tears herself.
F-Fuck... Tiffany...
Hearing his blonde lover getting emotional was a bit too difficult for the 23 year old abuse victim's ears to handle. Tiffany Maye was always such an optimistic, supportive, sweet and caring girl that he had met over three years ago. But after they had gotten committed the previous December, the optimism in her slowly started to fade. The peppy cheerleader from Glenberry University eventually started to turn into a worried young lady, having to juggle a job and the well-being of her boyfriend was a bit overwhelming, to say the least. I should've never gotten this close to her...
"I-It happens." he stated, attempting to brush everything off like it didn't matter. However, Tiffany wasn't buying it.
"It HAPPENS?" she exclaimed. "None of this is normal. Babe, listen to me: The way you've been acting lately has been making me worried sick about you. I worry about you all damn day while I'm at work. This is why I think you should REALLY get therapy. Dr. Beckman can help you."
He shrugged, knowing he was most likely in a metaphorical corner this time around.
"I... I..."
"No, don't even say it." she interrupted, not wanting to hear excuses. "Babe, I love you! Audrey loves you, Nikki loves you, and MY MOM loves you. I haven;t even gathered up the courage to tell her about what you were doing to yourself last week. After so long, she just now quit smoking. Do you know how heartbroken she'd be if she found out that you were hurting yourself? She'd probably be stressed out and go right back to it."
He sat there, knowing that she was right. I wouldn't want Jessie to die of lung cancer. I remember when I saw her on Inna De Poona last Summer, she was already having coughing fits. God damn, if only they knew what was wrong with me...
JD was a man of more mystery than met the eye. Some things he had going on he had yet to fully open up and reveal to any of his friends. He knew it would just cause more issues and more stress for his loving support system.
"Do you even know what had happened to me?" he asked.
"Yeah, I know." the blondie said, looking down as if she were remembering some disturbing chains of events. "Y-You were locked up in that group home for almost two years, you ghosted a lot of people while you were in there, and you were physically assaulted multiple times. Trust me, I know this. It's kinda hard not to think about it as soon as you told me what you had to go with. If I would've known that's the position you were in while we were separated, I would've NEVER done any of the things I had done back in college. Knowing that's where you had been breaks my heart..."
That's not eve the half of it. Does she REALLY know what I went through?
"Tiffany, there's a bunch of stuff I've been through that I haven't even mentioned yet." JD ominously said. "And you'll find out soon enough."
The blondie rolled her eyes, still a bit upset about everything that had gone down.
"You need therapy, Justin. I can't keep giving you pep talk every time you feel like hurting yourself. I was a cheerleader, not a therapist."
"I don't need therapy." he replied, sounding defensive. "I'm fine."
"Fine? FINE?" Tiffany hysterically said. "Someone who's fine doesn't cut themselves. Someone's who's FINE doesn't overdose on sleeping pills and hit their head on the coffee table. Justin, I know for a fact that you're anything but fine."
He frowned, knowing that he was finally on the verge of exposure. The sudden shift in tone that he started showing finally caught up to him. The secret was out, and now he was back to square one.
"knock knock knock Mr. Justin? May I come in?" a familiar gentleman said, entering the hospital room that JD was staying in.
He merely sat there, not giving am audible response, to the dismay of his blonde lover.
"Come in." she shouted, giving a response for him.
Entering the room, JD was then greeted by a familiar balding doctor, whom he already had a little bit of rocky history with.
"Beckman." he smugly replied, not sounding too enthusiastic to see Tiffany's sleazy boss in there with the two of them.
He shut the door behind him, proceeding to roll up a chair. He held a clipboard, carefully glancing at the documents inside.
"Hi, Howard." Tiffany greeted, trying to remain friendly towards him.
JD grit his teeth, not taking too kindly to hearing his girlfriend greet her boss by his first name he was some good friend of theirs.
The gentleman then made eye contact with his 23 year old patient, still sitting in bed and wearing the hospital scrubs.
"How are you feeling, Sir?" he asked, trying to sound as genuine as possible.
Justin grunted. "I feel like shit. Thanks for asking."
"Babe, come on now." Tiffany said, trying to get him be a bit more respectful.
Beckman then examined his clipboard, reading his medical report out loud.
"Name: Justin Dark. Age: 23, Date of Birth: December 14th. Patient has a history of severe bipolar disorder, major depressive disorder, suicidal tendencies including self-harm, a really bad case of post-traumatic stress disorder, and mild autism. Is that correct?"
He nodded, begrudgingly agreeing to those statements, especially the last one.
"Patient had attempted suicide from overdosing on sleeping pills." the doctor said, looking further at the report. "Patient was put on fluids to clean system. Patient also suffered a hemorrhage from blunt force on his head. Had apparently hit it on a coffee table in the living room. Now suffers from a head wound."
He nodded again, feeling the top of his aching head. Ugh... Stupid head wound...
"Is he going to be OK?" the blondie asked, hoping her boyfriend was going to be alright, especially considering it was the second time he had done such s thing as this.
The doctor looked at his papers, seeing what his treatment plan was going to be.
"He should be fine, but due to the set of circumstances, he will have to be on obligatory suicide watch for at least two weeks. I've also prescribed some pain relievers for the head wound, which you will need to monitor for him, Nurse Maye."
She nodded, knowing why it had to be this way. I don't want the guy to overdose on that shit too...
Beckman grabbed out some tools from a drawer, starting with a light.
"Let me see your eyes real quick, Mr. Justin." Dr. Beckman said.
JD leaned in, begrudgingly letting the doctor look into his eyes. May as well get it over with...
As he was performing all the basic vital exams, he decided to try and chit chat with him, seeing as how he was still very eager to give him some much-needed therapy sessions to help with his trauma.
"So, Mr. Justin? How would you feel about getting a bit of therapy?" the doctor asked, still looking into his pupils.
"I'm not interested, Beckman." he replied, trying to drop the conversation.
Beckman finished the eye exam, now switching over to look inside of both of his ears.
"Why not? Nurse Maye is highly concerned about you." he asked, looking into his left ear hole/
"Because I don't trust you."
Switching ears, he continued the conversation, hoping to at least try and get on Justin's good side.
"You can trust me, Sir. I want to help you, but you've got to cooperate with me."
He ignored the sleazy doctor, still not trusting him in the slightest. Beckman then pulled out his stethoscope, placing it on JD's back.
"Breathe in deeply." he said.
He slowly breathed in, then exhaled out. He still felt like it was pointless even replying to Dr. Beckman's manipulative smooth talk.
"I know how you doctors work." the 23 year old stated. "I know about your kind. All of you work with THEM."
Although he was being vague about the phrase THEM, Beckman already had his suspicions as to who Justin was referring to.
"I don't work with them, but FOR them." the balding doctor stated. "I know what you've experienced while under the custody of Greenseed."
The moment he said that phrase, it immediately triggered flashbacks in the back of JD's mind.
"Don't EVER say that word again." he said, snapping at his doctor in a rather aggressive manner.
Tiffany, who was still sitting with him, had a bad feeling in her gut. She knew that her boyfriend going off on her friendly boss was definitely not a good look for the 23 year old blonde nurse.
"Justin, calm down. He wants to help you." Tiffany stated, trying to deescalate everything.
He shook his head, still having his disregards for any potential hope he had in his life.
"Help me? He can't help me after what they did. No one CARES about what they did. They just see me as a disobedient little PRICK that doesn't do what he's told!"
Ah... This poor guy. I know he's feeling hurt inside. But there's not much else I can do.
"Sir, if you'll please: Give my therapy sessions a fair chance. I'd like to have a better understanding of what YOU had experienced, personally."
Justin sighed, having a rather odd feeling erupting from inside of him. This motherfucker thinks he's a smooth talker, eh? He'd probably report me to their CEO or some shit. But, I gotta get him off my back somehow...
"I'll think about it, okay?" he said, trying to get the doctor off of him.
Beckman gave off a subtle grin, thinking the work he was doing did take some type of toll on his judgement.
"I'll take it, for now." he said, getting up from his chair and making his way out of the hospital room.
"I'm going to get the nurse in here to check your blood pressure. I'll let you discharge tomorrow morning so you can think about what I'm offering you, okay?"
Tomorrow morning? No few day psych ward? No med adjustments? Hell yeah!
"Eh, thanks."
The doctor nodded. "Don't mention it."
He then focused his attention towards his blonde worker, looking her in the eyes.
"And I'll see you later, Tiffany." Beckman stated, shutting the door behind him.
JD clenched his fist, still not appreciating what he was trying to do. That fat bastard's trying to marinate my girl...
After he had left the room, it was back to just the two of them. Justin and Tiffany awkwardly sat there, not sure what else they needed to discuss.
She then grabbed his hand, knowing that he was in a lot of pain, both mentally and physically.
"It'll be OK." she said, proceeding to give a light smooch on his hand.
He looked down, feeling a bit ashamed of himself. He knew his mind had been completely messed up ever since he had left that place. There were still so many untold secrets about him that he never shared, not even with someone as close to him as Tiffany Maye.
If the Commotion City police department were reliable, he would've reported them a long time ago and hoped that they would've been shut down for their immoral crimes that still had long been unpunished. Justice was never severed for the Greenseed Corporation. And unfortunately, it seemed like that would be the case for the rest of his life.
Those motherfuckers got away with so much shit, yet I'm seen as the bad guy for some fucking reason.
Eventually, Tiffany decided to leave for the evening when advised by a nurse. She had already spent enough time in the hospital for one day, just outside of her work shift alone was too much.
"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning, okay?" she said, gently kissing him on the forehead. "I love you."
She smiled, still feeling touched at his mutual feeling. He's so special... I don't think I can ever leave him...
"I love you too, Justin." she replied. "And I really hope you get better. We all really care about you, you know?"
He shrugged, not sure how much of that was true or not.
"Get some rest, okay?" the blondie added, giving him one last smooch. "Good night, Babe."
"Good night. Tiffany." he replied, proceeding to try and relax himself for a long night's sleep.
He laid his head down, having a small grin on his face, feeling a bit warm on the inside. The fact that he was at least fortunate enough to be in a good relationship like this, especially after all that had happened with him, was a bit relieving. Regardless, a lot of damage had already been done. And for some reason, the 23 year old guy with PTSD had a bad feeling that this was only the start of it...
I'm so fucked up... he thought to himself, as he drifted off into a tranquil sleep.