Chapter 1: Year 1: Change of Fate

Chapter Text

One evening, like any other, Regulus sat down with his parents. Only difference being, this time tomorrow, he'd be at Hogwarts. He'd be with Sirius once more, and maybe then, just maybe, they both could drop the act. He could drop the perfect son act, just like Sirius had done, and Regulus could be happy. Just one more night to go, and he wouldn't have to put up with his horrible mother or his father - who just agreed with everything that she said. He could finally be free of the manipulation.

Unfortunately, nothing was ever that simple.

"Son, we need to talk to you," his father spoke to him in the middle of dinner with a stern expression on his face. Regulus straightened up and nodded, his emotions hidden behind his perfectly crafted walls. Nothing good ever happened when his father said those words, and Regulus glanced at his father's drink - brandy. Great, he was drunk too.

"Yes, Father?" he asked smoothly.

"We are expecting you to make up for your brother's mistakes. We expect you to make our family proud. Now, when you get to Platform Nine and Three Quarters, head straight to the Slytherin carriage. Your older cousins will be expecting you."

"Why can't I make my own friends?" Regulus couldn't help but question. He had to give up so much, so young. It was like his parents knew that Sirius was going to leave them and so decided that they should take Regulus' own childhood away from him, instead.

They trained Regulus to become someone who wasn't himself, and because of that, he lost himself in the process. Regulus would do anything to try and find himself again.

Anything.

"We're relying on you, son. The Blacks have been in Slytherin for generations. It's your turn to live up to that."

Regulus nodded; he couldn't bring himself to speak. He couldn't bring himself to defend his future actions. He should get to decide who he makes friends with. It was meant to be his life, not his parents living through him. Controlling his every move.

Enough was enough.

He knew what to do. And nothing was going to stop him.

The next day, he made it to Platform Nine and Three Quarters an hour early. He didn't get on the train straight away, however. He was waiting for his brother standing near the barrier, who had spent the summer with the Potters. He didn't know how Sirius got away with that, but he had a feeling he wasn't going to get away with it next summer. His parents were drunkenly arguing about him and the Potters last night after he had gone to bed. Regulus had heard every word. He was used to it in ways an eleven-year-old shouldn't be.

His eyes lit up after a few minutes waiting, seeing Sirius walk through the barrier with his trolley. Regulus didn't move as he leaned against one of the block pillars, waiting for Sirius to notice him. He hoped, well... he hoped that Sirius would see him first. His heart sank, however, when Sirius spun round and stared at the barrier, clearly waiting for someone and Regulus knew exactly who it was.

"James!" he heard Sirius call out and Regulus heard the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. His brother's best friend James Potter's laughter. Regulus stared at James's messy hair as his brother and James hugged. He was still staring when James made eye contact with him. Regulus looked down, staring at his shoes, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly.

They had met once. When he was forced to go to Diagon Alley with Sirius, he had invited his friends along. He didn't get on with Peter. Or Remus. But he and James connected with their love for Sirius, and it turned out they had quite a bit in common. Perhaps too much, as they both decided not to write. He wondered if James still liked him, but he thought that was unlikely.

"Is that your brother?" he heard James say, and Sirius turned round, following James's gaze, and Regulus slowly looked up. His own curly hair covering his forehead and eyes, Regulus ran a hand through it as he gave Sirius a sheepish smile, avoiding eye contact with James.

"Yeah, yeah, that's him. Come on, I'll introduce you." So he had clearly forgotten the shopping trip. The summer holidays must have been good to him. Alright for some, he thought.

"Y-you'll what? No, you don't have to. It's no bother…"

Regulus frowned internally. Why did James not want to see him again?

"Reggie. How was your summer?" Sirius asked as they both stood opposite him. He could tell Sirius was being polite. Their parents had at least taught them both manners.

Horrible. Father drank his way through the summer. Mother wants me to be the perfect Black. I think I have a headache from the amount of lectures she's given me. I want this all to be over. I want to be me again. That's what he wanted to say.

"Fine, Siri. How was yours?" he asked just as politely.

"Fine."

Regulus heard James cough awkwardly, and that seemed to wake Sirius up a bit.

"Reggie, this is James. James, Reggie."

"Hi." Regulus finally looked up at James, who smiled at him in greeting. He was probably just being friendly. He couldn't imagine James being shy. Maybe, he secretly hated him? Sirius's voice brought him out of his thoughts.

"Are you sitting with me?" Sirius asked him, and Regulus couldn't keep in a groan, missing the look of amusement in both Sirius's and James's eyes.

"I have to join the cousins," he replied, trying not to pout. He was a Black after all, and they were taught not to pout at a young age.

"Ah, alright. Well, see you there." Sirius started to walk away, and Regulus frowned, wanting to say something, but he couldn't quite manage it. So much for dropping the act, he thought as he glanced at James, who was still standing there.

"You're not going with him?" Regulus asked, trying to hide the pain in his voice. His eyes narrowed at James's cocky smile, and his eyes widened even more when James linked arms with him.

"No. We are," James said and Regulus scoffed.

"You don't want me around," he replied, although he didn't fight James as they got onto the train. His choices. He was going to make his own friends. He was going to be himself.

"Not true. You just decided that. I want you in our carriage. Who else will I have to plan pranks on Sirius with?" James questioned rhetorically.

Regulus let out a laugh of disbelief, eyebrows raised as he started to list a couple of names. "Remus? Peter?"

"Ah, but Peter's too far up Sirius's arse…" Regulus snorted unattractively. "... and Remus, well. He's too much of a goody-goody. You're going to be my partner in crime, deal?" James finished speaking just as they got to the compartment his brother was in.

Regulus felt a smile tugging at his lips. "Deal," he whispered.

"I thought you had to go to see our dear cousins?" Sirius asked the moment Regulus and James walked in, sitting down next to each other. Remus was sitting next to Sirius, and Peter wasn't anywhere in sight.

"Got a better offer," Regulus replied simply. "Good to see you again, Remus," he spoke smoothly, nodding to the boy as he took a book out of his back trouser pocket. Books were the only thing that kept him sane over the years. And especially this summer, books were his friends. He didn't care how sad that sounded.

He then leant back against the side of the compartment with the sliding doors, got comfy, found the page he was on last night and began to read. He felt eyes on him and ignored them.

"You too, Regulus," he heard Remus reply after a few moments of silence.

He didn't know how much time had gone past, too lost in his book to care about the outside world. That was until he heard the doors slide open.

"There you are, cousin." Regulus knew who that voice belonged to straight away. "Come join us."

This is where it starts, the small decisions, the way he behaved. It all starts here.

"Bellatrix! Boy have I missed you." Regulus' tone was dripping with sarcasm, not looking up from the page he was on. "I'll join you later, cousin. Toodles," he said strangely happily and his lips curled upwards into a smile as he heard her mutter to herself and strut back out of the compartment.

He heard James laughing the moment Bellatrix was far enough away, and he was surprised when he heard his brother and Remus laugh with him. Regulus glanced up from his book and gave them all a look. He stopped though when James patted him on his shoulder.

"It's like there's two of you, dear God," Remus muttered loud enough for them all to hear with a grin on his face.

"I've never seen her face so red before," Sirius said in between his laughter. "You haven't lost your sense of humour, brother."

"The way you didn't even look at her," James said, grinning from ear to ear. Regulus hid himself, covering his face with his book at the attention he was receiving from the group.

The journey to Hogwarts was a long one, and at some point, Regulus fell asleep. He dreamt of a time which seemed so long ago where he and Sirius were inseparable. And then, and then the dreaded talk from their parents which ruined everything. He flinched as he watched younger Sirius protect young Regulus from their drunken mother. When his younger self jumped, Regulus jumped awake, fear written in his eyes.

"Are you alright?"

Regulus heard Remus question, voice full of concern, and Regulus nodded, feeling a strange warmth in his stomach, smiling not very convincingly.

"I'm f-fine," Regulus stuttered, shivering a little. He caught James looking at him with the same expression as Remus, and Sirius was frowning at him. Peter had at some point joined them in the compartment and looked at him with a shy smile.

"I'm fine, really," Regulus repeated, more for himself than them. "How long till we get to Hogsmeade? I'm starving."

"Fifteen minutes or so," Sirius replied, "so you might want to get changed."

Regulus blinked and nodded, getting his clothes, he made his way out of the compartment to the nearest restroom and got changed quickly. His mind was on the sorting. Was he really going to go into Slytherin like his family before him? Could he put on an act for seven years without turning as cold and disheartened as his parents? He didn't know if he was brave enough. Strong enough, even. He didn't know what the future held, but he knew one thing. He didn't want to be friends with his cousins like his mother wanted. He was eleven! Did she know that? No. She didn't care when you were only five and you had to learn the family etiquette.

He left the restroom and made his way back to his compartment with a neutral expression, running a hand through his short curly hair, trying to neaten it up a bit.

He rejoined the others, sitting down; he couldn't help but fidget and stare at a speck of dust on the floor. He was nervous, and he didn't care if they saw that or not. He honestly was starting to think that he should have gone to the Slytherin carriage like his parents told him to. What would happen when they find out he didn't go?

"We were just as nervous, you know." James's voice brought him out of his thoughts and Regulus' lips turned upwards, not quite reaching a smile.

"Between you and us, James was going to be sick," Sirius said with a grin and Regulus laughed, glancing at James who looked appalled at his best friend.

"That was meant to be a secret, Sirius!" James scolded half-heartedly.

"Thanks," he spoke to them, before turning to Sirius. He had no idea what to say to him, but he felt like he should say something. "I…"

"See you on the other side, Reggie."

OoO

His heart was beating heavily, he didn't know how many more names there'd be until his name would be called. Every time he glanced at the Gryffindor Table, to Sirius and his friends, he only saw James looking worriedly at him. Sirius was focused on everyone else, and to be honest, Regulus didn't blame him for that.

Regulus looked at the Slytherin Table, spotting Bellatrix, Narcissa and a few others his parents would want him to spend time with. They looked cold, vacant. Their masks they wore to cover up emotions, the ones he'd have to learn… he didn't know what he would do if the hat chose to place him in Slytherin. Be the favourite, he supposed. Maybe help the light in years to come, just to defy his mother and father.

He had to think of back up plans. And quickly. If he was going to survive seven years at Hogwarts, he was going to do it in style.

"Black, Regulus."

This was it. He walked with purpose up to the stool, head held high. He controlled his breathing as he sat down. He felt the hat touch his hair, and he hid a jump when he heard the hat hum in thought.

"Interesting," the hat said. "And here I was getting ready to put another Black in Slytherin. There's more to you than meets the eye, young Black. "

Regulus gulped. "There is?"

"Yes, you're loyal. You still have hope that your relationship with your brother isn't ruined by your parents. You're clever, too. It's all here, inside your head. Making decisions that will change your fate in years to come."

He frowned, not knowing what the hat meant by that. "You're bursting with knowledge, and I'm not sure a back pocket is the place to put a book, young man."

Regulus hid a blush, it probably wasn't. But you never knew when you'd want to read. Can they read during meals here?

"Alright, I think I know just where to put you. This is going to shock everyone but you, isn't it? Be careful, don't lose yourself again, Black… RAVENCLAW!"

There was a wave of silence, and it was so quiet he was sure they'd have heard a pin drop. Then he saw James stand up and cheer, along with his brother and then the rest of Gryffindor cheered, as well as Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff. Slytherin clapped politely, and Regulus made his way to where the other Ravenclaw first years were seated. He nodded to Sirius, who gave him a grin and nodded back at him.

He was in blue.

He could do this, right?

OoO

Sirius sat back down as the rest of the sorting went on. He glanced at his brother at the Ravenclaw Table and frowned, deep in thought. He had not been expecting that, he thought that Regulus was going to be a Slytherin like the rest of his deranged family. This changed everything.

"I'm not surprised."

James's voice brought Sirius out of his thoughts, and Sirius raised his eyebrows. "You're not?"

"No." He noticed James wore a smile on his face, and Sirius glanced at Remus, who shrugged.

"He was reading the whole train journey when he wasn't asleep," Remus commented.

"I guess…"

"You never know, we might have another position in our group going spare," James said with a mischievous grin. Sirius's eyes lit up, maybe it wasn't too late for him and Regulus? Maybe they could fix the gap that had been forced by their parents?

"What are you planning, James?" Sirius questioned and James grinned brightly.

"You'll see, Sirius, you'll see."

OoO

Regulus had finally climbed up the stairs of the Ravenclaw Tower with the other first years and the prefect that was showing them where everything was. He had mentally mapped out the route from the Great Hall to the Ravenclaw Tower, so he wouldn't be lost tomorrow morning.

"Here, we have the Ravenclaw Common Room, and to get in we don't have passwords. We have riddles," the prefect said, and Regulus glanced at the door knocker and was surprised when it spoke.

"What can sail the world while travelling in one corner?"

Regulus only had to think for a moment. "A stamp?" he answered, sounding unsure of his answer. He smiled when the door creaked open.

"Well done, now..."

As he entered the common room, he seemed to be in his own world as his mouth opened slightly in awe. This was his home for the next seven years. He didn't regret his choices at all.

He could do this.

He had to.