Annoying Family
Damian Wayne and Jon Kent (Superboy) are entering the
Wayne Manor after getting picked up from school with an
helicopter, Tim Drake (Red Robin) is on a chair and seeing
them enter the manor.
Tim Drake: Hi, who are you?
Damian: He is Jon. (Now too Jon) Lets go quick.
Tim: Do you know where the coffee machine is, i heard
there is a new machine.
Damian: No, Drake, and now shut up.
Tim: That is not a nice way of talkin... (He falls asleep)
They walk to Damian's room and Dick Grayson (Nightwing)
knocks on the door.
Damian: You can come in.
Dick walks in and an shock trap activates.
Dick: Not cool, Damian.
Damian: Ok, Fossil.
Dick: Dont call me that, im 25!
Damian: Almost a fossil, now good.
Jon: Dont be so hard on him.
Damian: Why not, the fossil can take something, although he
is over emotional and stuff.
Dick: But as i wanted to ask, is that your boyfriend?
Damian: | am straight for if you dont know, and you know,
i've got a crush on Raven.
Jon: (whispers) Oh...
Dick: I didn't know that.
Damian: Oh, you we're the only one that didn't know, i
forgot about that.
Dick: Why not me, why could like Jason be trusted but not
me.
Damian: Cause you are a dick.
Dick: | can't change that name! (crying)
Damian: See, overemotional.
Jon: You we're right with that one.
Bruce (Batman) walks past the door.
Bruce: Hey, isn't that your boyfriend?
Damian: Just shut the F '#! up!
Bruce: That's not how you talk to your father!
Damian: Do i care?
Jon: (whispers) That is not a smart move.
Damian: Can we just finish this building project on Minecraft. |
didn't even add the villager torturer yet.
Bruce: So he's not your boyfriend.
Damian: Yes, the only person i will love in my life is Raven!
Bruce: Calm down!
Damian: Do not tell me to calm down! Everyone in this house keeps
saying that he is my boyfriend!
Jon: Calm down for a sec.
Damian: Shut up! Now!
Damian walks out of his room to the Wayne farm. (Yes, there is a
Wayne Farm.) Alfred approaches him.
Alfred (The Butler and father figure of like everyone): Are you
alright, master Damian?
Damian: Not really. (Pets the Bat-Cow)
Alfred: What is wrong?
Damian: Everyone keeps saying that Jon is my boyfriend, but i'm
straight, and i already have a crush.
Alfred: That is not so nice, perhabs i could talk to them.
5 minutes later:
Alfred: So please don't tell master Damian that Superboy is his
boyfriend.
Jason Todd (The Red Hood): Ok, you have a good reason. 4
Dick: Ok, but please don't put shock traps LIF
in front of the door.
Tim: (snoring) zzzzzzz=z
Selina Kyle (She is CatWoman): This is just cute.
Damian: What did you just say!
Damian kicks Selina to the wall.
Damian: Never. Say. That. Again.
Date Night
Damian Wayne asked Raven (Daughter of the Demon Trigon
and Member of the Teen Titans) for a date to the Taco
Planet.
Raven: These taco's are delicous.
Damian: | know, that's why i asked you on a date here.
Raven: You're so cute.
Damian: If any other person would say that i would get a
knife.
Raven: That's positive.
Dick, Cassandra (Orphan) and Tim sit at another table in the
restaurant.
Dick: Isn't this a bit mean.
Cassandra: No, this is just entertainment.
Dick: Alright.
Damian sees them.
Damian: Can you guys get out of here, please.
Tim: We got spotted, what now?
Cassandra: Maybe we walk and watch from the window.
Dick: Good idea.
Raven: Was that your family?
Damian: Yep, good that they are gone, where we're we?
At the roof Bruce and Alfred are looking.
Alfred: Are you sure it's a good idea to spy on Master
Damian?
Bruce: He's my son, i have the right to see it.
Damian: You look great tonight.
Raven: | always do. (Tries to kiss him).
Damian: This moment is just like a movie. (Kisses)
Bruce: Well done!
Damian: Father, what are you doing here?
Alfred: I knew this would happen, Master Bruce.
Bruce: Lets run!
Damian: Can't we just be left alone!
Raven: | thought my family was annoying.
Damian: Whoever is still out there better runs!
Selina whispers from a hiding space: Still cute.
Jason: That is way too true, and so not Damian.
Stephanie Brown (Spoiler): Love changes people.
Jason: Could be true, or he is mind controlled.
Stephanie: Just no. And don't even try murdering Raven.
Jason: Daughter of a demon, i'm just saying, Its possible.
Selina: Past doesn't make present.
Jason: Says an ex-criminal, maybe you still are a criminal.
Stephanie: Don't try to destroy Damian's happiness.
Jason: That's my role as brother. What should i use? A gun? I'll
use a gun.
Stephanie: Don't do it.
Jason shoots an gun and Raven uses her forcefield just in
time.
Damian: Todd! F# ! you!
Damian throws batarangs to get his jacket stuck to the wall,
then he uses a batarang with his hands to break his helmet.
Then he tries to finish it but Selina stops him.
Selina: Don't kill him.
Damian: But he tried to. He just. He shot a bullet at Raven!
Tim: And he will pay for that without dying.
Damian: You again. Can't i just have a date without people
coming in!
Duke (The Signal): Welcome to my world.
Raven: You truly have a nosy family.
Alfred: Perhabs it's a good idea to leave Master Damian and
his girlfriend alone.
Damian: That is a good idea!
Jason: Nope, not in this family.
Damian: I. Will. Kill. You.
Bruce: And i will ground him before you can kill him.
Damian: Father, please get him grounded for a long time. And
get out of here.
Bruce: It would be my pleasure. (Whispers) | won't but he
doesn't have to know.
Snowballs
Damian: Ok, i'm sorry but, what are the rules of a snowball
fight?
Dick: Throw snowballs in a fight.
Damian: Sounds fun.
Dick: 3. 2...
Jason: Boring, just go.
While everyone throws snowballs Damian climbs in a tree.
He gets ice snowballs out of it and attacks from above.
He hits Tim. '
Tim: Hey, ice balls aren't allowed!
Damian: Grayson didn't say that.
Dick: Uhh, i did say that, right?
Damian: Always finding a door. Ok. (
Damian jumps out of the tree and gets a gadget. A device
that explodes and spreads snowballs.
It exploded.
Dick: Gadgets are also not allowed.
Damian: Always finding ideas that help yourself, Boy
Wonder.
Jason: How was your date?
Damian: Destroyed, by you. But other than that it was
great. And. Dont get distracted.
Goliath (Little red creature with wings) spit out snowballs
getting Dick and Tim on the ground.
Tim: Are pets even allowed?
Dick: Alliances with other people are allowed so, yes, pets
are allowed.
Bruce: Thanks for the tip. Lets call my buddy Superman
(Alien from destroyed planet with powers generated by
the yellow sun).
Bruce calls Superman and borrows Krypto (Supermans
son). Krypto uses his freeze breath to freeze Jason.
Goliath fights Krypto and leaves the Bat Family on the
ground.
Bruce throws Batarangs modified with snow and
eliminates Goliath.
Damian: Hey! | will destroy you for that!
Bruce: Good luck, you will need it.
Damian: Luck is superstillon. All fake.
Cassandra: Good Luck, Batman.
Stephanie: You will need it.
Bruce: Oh, shit.
Bruce got eliminated by Cassandra and Stephanie.
Damian: Good job.
Cassandra: Thanks, now go to hell.
Damian: What?!
Cassandra tries to get Stephanie and Damian but only
hits Stephanie.
Damian: Good Luck, you will need it.
Damian eliminates Cassandra.
Selina: Need a paw.
Damian: Not this idiot.
Selina: Be careful who you call an idiot.
Damian: Krypto, now.
Krypto eliminates Selina.
Selina: Wasn't he on Batman's side?
Damian: Little help from Superboy.
Luke: Want a wing.
Duke: Leave a signal if you want one.
Damian: You didn't really think that through. (Laughing).
Luke: That's kinda true.
Damian: But i did. Hi, Alfred, you can get me now.
Alfred tries to get Damian but Damian dogdes and hits
Duke. Damian hits Luke.
Alfred: That wasn't the deal.
Damian: Now it is, and now the other Alfred.
Alfred: Other Alfred?
Alfred, the cat gets on Alfreds head and Damian hits
Alfred.
Damian: All you need is a plan.
Damian: This is why i am the superior Robin.
Tim: | am better, the Red Robin is the best Robin.
Dick: No, the original Robin is best.
Cassandra: | was best.
Damian, Tim and Dick: NO!
Jason: It's obvious i was the best Robin.
Damian: | was better on my first second, Todd.
Jason: What makes you better?
Damian: We're both 2 of the best Robin's because we're
not scared to have blood on our hands, and i am trained
by assaisans, so, i am best.
Dick: You don't have to kill to be the best Robin! Killing
is what makes you the worst Robin, didn't you look at
our lessons to you.
Damian: Wasn't that the sleeping pause?
Jason: | thought the same.
Damian: The best Robin is the Robin who won, so me.
Jason: Maybe Alfred the Cat won, or Krypto?
Damian: | led them!
Tim: Pretty sure Alfred got the last one.
Damian: | am the only one that is called Robin right now.
Tim: | am a Robin.
Damian: Red Robin
Tim: That is Red, Robin.
Damian: But with Red, i am just Robin, so i'm the Robin.
And the bloodson.
Cassandra: Here we go again.
Tim: That you are the biological son doesn't make you
the best Robin.
Damian: Pretty sure Robins are the sons of Batman, and
i am the most sonnest son.
Cassandra: And daughters.
Damian: Yeah, but i am the best Robin. Now and foreve
Sorry
Damian: Grayson, can you help me with some homework?
Dick: Can't you ask Jon?
Damian: This is a special project.
Dick: Ask Tim.
Damian: Please not him.
Dick: Why not?
Damian: I've made mistakes with him, i don't really want a part 2.
Dick: What kind of mistakes?
Damian: When i just met Tim, i almost murdered him cause my
little knowlegde about taking places and stuff. | thought that
with killing him i could take his place. Have a role. | havent talked
to him alone since that hapenned. | don't know what to do.
Dick: Oh, i'm sorry to hear that. Should i help you talking to Tim.
Damian: Okay, if you want too.
A little while later they are knocking at Tim's door.
Tim: Come in, there are no shock traps.
Dick: Hello, Tim, Damian wants to say something.
Damian: I-I-I'm so s-sorry, Tim, i'm sorry that i tried killing you
when we met, i thought that that is how you get a place in the
world. But that is only how it goes in the league of assasains.
Tim: l understand you, i don't think it's easy to do stuff our way
when having been raised by assasains.
Dick: Didn't you have a school project?
Damian: Oh, Tim, do you know how to bake?
Tim: Yes, what do you need to make?
Damian: A pie.
Damian and Tim went to the kitchen.
Tim: Where do you start?
Damian: The bothom sounds logical.
Fifthy minutes later an pie that looks like an animal made it is on
the table.
Tim: Looks great.
Damian: Yeah, i'm gonna get an F.