14XX/05/01 Johannes Calendar

First Day out of many more to come…

How should I say this? Umm, let's just say shit got weird really fast.

Back home, we have this place called Gensokyo where creatures like Youkais and demons existed, and we just won a brutal world-wide war against the forces of hell like a year ago. After living for so long in that strange land, I thought I could handle anything.

Except, this time shits are different.

After the war, many new celebrations popped up to celebrate certain events that happened during the war, and one of the most popular is the Army of God and Saints festival. It is a festival dedicated to the lesser gods, Youkais and humans that fought side-by-side against an overwhelming and terrifying foe. A traditional village at the foot of Mount Fuji hosted said event, and being the entrepreneur I am, I saw an opportunity for cash.

After some consideration, I decided to bring my protégé Sairento Hito. He's a good kid, took a lot of his features from his dad such as his rock-hard conviction, loyalty, and his strange speech mannerism. Seriously, anything beyond 3 words from him would sound like something he read from a script. Not that it matters though; he's a good-looking fella with green hairs and eyes as green as emeralds. Everything's Gucci if you're hot enough.

Papers done, equipment checked, and we're off to Japan. I ain't scared though. This ain't my first rodeo. And hi de ho, here I go on 28 November, just after Thanksgiving and another month before Christmas. Like it matters anyway, I'm not even Christian!

So anyway, after passing through custom with little effort and braving the local traffic, we finally arrived at the mountain and got things in order. We came early, so we have plenty of time to touch up our little shindig. By the time December rolls in, we were knee-deep in the river of cosplayers.

Apparently, the festival theme of celebrating the bravery and unity between gods and humans led to people cosplaying entirely on a military setup; tactical gears, fake rifles, extra ears, uniforms. The cosplay ranged from 'raided-decommissioned-wartime-gear' all the way to 'kinky-barrack-bunnies-down-to-fuck' level. Mercifully for my reputation, the exhibitionists have their own corner far away though, would be bad for business if someone saw me chatting up someone wearing nothing but a vest over her micro-bikini.

But disregarding all the cosplays, the food, the views, it was simply the right time and the right place for us. When we walked from the backstage to the front we were greeted by raucous cheering, all hyped to see the Scarlet Devil Triggerman himself. I felt like a fucking rockstar, just soaking up the adulation from the people in front of me. With that said, me and Sairento then opened up the box on the stage and put on the Mark II Survivalist Suit right in front of everyone on the stage.

Imagine a double-layered jumpsuit made from rubberized fabric, with shock-absorbent paddings at the forearms, shoulders, hood, knees, and shins. The outside shell of the suit has enough straps to become a makeshift MOLLE for suits, while the inside has another set of thin wires, straps and tubes to help act as a slimmer load-bearing system. However, the main draw of the suit was two things; one, the temperature regulator system that uses a circuit of liquid tubes that wraps around the body which was either cooled or heated up by a small machine at the back of the neck. It takes a minute for the special liquid to be heated or cooled, but once it starts, enjoy any weather at any time.

Then there's the dynamo charger at the hip. Like the liquid circuit, there's a series of wires at the leg that helps charges the battery at the hip. Take a long walk, and your phones and your body cooler will get charged up. If not, press and button and a lever will come out for manual cranking.

Sure, it wasn't as advanced as my usual suit, but for a civilian market? It's good enough. Slap some gear on top and you have one hell of a survival suit courtesy of me and my engineers.

I basked in the adulation of the crowd, my pride as a Scarlet Devil sated again. It was one of my older designs that I used back in Gensokyo, but never shared to anybody else. Sure, the newest model in the military were a collaboration effort with the Kappas, but this is my personal invention made public, the look that defined the Scarlet Devil Triggerman himself. And I felt more than happy that I can finally share my work with so many people.

But of course, as a Scarlet Devil, my sense of theatrics demands more. So, I told the 400+ convention-goers that I will spend a week on top of Mount Fuji to prove my product to the public, and they can track our progress via drone that will be released now. We grabbed our stuff, walked off the stage, and made our way to the mountain, all the while the convention-goers are losing their shits and tapping into their smartphone to get into the livestream.

The trip up there was uneventful. It's a beautiful day outside to be honest; the tender snow just coated the field in pure white, mottled by spots of pink flowers. The sky itself was clear, giving us a clear view of the mountain itself. The air itself was crisp and clear, cold with winter wind. The path we took were easy, and we found ourselves among the snowy region in the evening. We camped out at the foot of the mountain, where I 'accidentally' found a small crate full of ammunitions, while the drone was away for the night to recharge.

Suddenly, the idyllic moment was interrupted by a horrifying scream. It was so close too, so we moved like the wind and followed the agonized wailing. I was roaring into my earpiece, demanding for them to send out a spare drone at once. Of all the time for an accident to happen…

Just as I was about to sue the entire security department, Hito piped up and pointed me toward a small spot of red just a few steps away from us. It was blood, freshly spilt onto the cold snow. We followed the blood trail, our heart sinking as our mind creates the picture from the spilled blood. Ragged stains of blood indicates that our poor victim was stemming the flow of his blood from his side, before being dragged away by something huge. A bear? In this season? Footprint doesn't match anything I know of.

It was kinda surprising when we reached the place. It was a tight little crevasse, gently sloping into a dark abyss where the wailing came from. It has died down to piteous whimpering, its sound bouncing off the wall and echoed out of the cave itself. I ordered the drone to watch the area and send more men while we descend into the jaws of hell once more. What choice do we have? Rescue is like a few hours away and we are losing daytime fast.

My protégé shared the same ideal, and went down the crevice with grim determination. I followed suit, thanking my past self for packing in real ammo instead of blanks like the organizer demanded. Who the fuck does that guy think he is? The fucking president?

And that, is the start of one of the worst days of my entire fucking life.

Should've known that I should fucking ignore the scream and scram the moment Hito fell on his ass and landed on top of a fucking invisible platform. INVISIBLE, FUCKING PLATFORM! Who the fuck thinks that adding a fucking glass floor above a bottomless pit is a good fucking idea?! Hito almost soiled his goddamn new suit on. This model doesn't have a built-in diaper yet.

We followed the platform into a series of dilapidated metal corridor. The fuck? How the hell did this thing actually exist? Like, who would think it's a good idea to build a freaking facility in the most inaccessible area of the mountain? It's not like it was still in use, the mildew and fungus cover most of the wall, giving off a pungent smell as we strode through the labyrinth. Is this some kind of unfinished Doomsday bunker? A knockoff NORAD facility deep inside Japan's heritage? Who the fuck is the contractor of the place? Did they outsource this shit so much that they ended up hiring art degree interns to do the job? Cuz there's so much hole in this place that it felt like I'm walking inside someone's artistic vision of a metallic Swiss Cheese.

We turned into a room that we assumed to be the storage room, what with the pile of chests and sacks haphazardly strewn around the room. Most of the chest were made from wood, bearing old clothing and fresh food. Some rarer one coloured red with gold foundation held guns instead. 2 Desert Eagles, 1 beautiful flintlock rifle with its ammo, and a bloody MP5 Submachinegun with only one full spare mag.

This raises more questions to us. Who the fuck lives here? The food is fresh, the guns are well-maintained although lacking much ammo, and the clothing while old in fashion are still serviceable. That means someone really IS hiding down here, and he's not far away.

And if so, where did he go?

Our answer came in the form of an eldritch abomination. It looks like a naked woman was affixed on top of a white crescent machine with green lines going toward the lower region. The rear area has a black ball that looks like a speaker or something. Spikes protrude from her back and some harpoon head levitates at her side, ready to skewer us. It was not the harpoon that bothers us, the woman is naked. Her top human part has no bra, showing off her tits in full nipple glory while she was grinning like a madman. The area at the lower part looks like a section of smooth skin, only for its middle to have a hole that looks-no, that is ACTUALLY a vagina.

What the fuck.

She tries to skewer us like fish with her harpoons, but we're faster than that. I got my rifle up and blasted the bitch's skull open while Hito punctured her vagina-like opening with her HKUSP. I've no idea why the fuck he chose to shoot that out of all places that existed, I wasn't even asking him to do that, but her dying screams makes it hard for us to do any reflection at the moment. When her corpse fell onto the metal floor with a heavy thud, I grabbed the MP5 and tossed it to Hito.

We woke up the dead with our gunshots, and they rose to take vengeance against us.

They were everywhere; attacking from the gaps on the floor, jumping down from the ceiling, crawling from the side trying to stop us. We were on full red alert; outgunned, outnumbered, but not outmatched. No, never outmatched.

We fought like hell, painting the entire corridor with their black blood. But the tide is turning against us, for every one we killed, 2 more takes its place. We were getting overwhelmed. The MP5 went dry and Hito chucked it at one of the abominations, stunning it enough for me to slice its throat open. Fuck me, of all the time for me to leave behind my favourite shotgun at home!

After fighting our way back to the entrance, we were blocked by another eldritch abomination on the glass platform. I personally have no time to admire the design as a fleshy naked girl blocks the path with her petal of meat. The inside of the thing is a girl, but the meaty part of it looks rotten and damp, as if some corpse has died in it and it was in a process of digesting the meat. For all I knew the woman itself might've been a victim too, being slowly digested from waist up. Maybe that's why her clothes were gone, it was digested first!

Red filled our vision and fury filled our veins. We can hear the other abomination closing on us fast behind us and our only way out is blocked by a single eldritch flower. So, in desperation, we just slammed ourselves into her and stabbed like utter madmen, ripping her apart with our knives and desperate fury.

I don't really know what happened next. As I feel her neck gave in to the final cut, I heard a warning cry from my protégé at my side and a gunshot. But it was too late as something struck the ground hard and shattered the platform into millions of pieces, dooming us all to the endless void.

How am I still alive, when my comrade was dead?

No, he can't be dead. If I can survive this, he can too.

How did I end up here, in a warm inn in a peaceful village populated by humans and strange slime girl thing? How the hell did I end up here when I was falling to my death in some dark abyss forgotten even by God himself?

The answer is, I don't know.

Honest! I really don't. All I know is that just as I have done screaming my lungs out and was accustomed by the speed of my descend, I was rudely awakened by a vision of white before impact. Judging by my speed of descend, the impact should've liquified my internal organs, yet all I feel is just a low impact, as if I have fallen off my bed.

I knew this is not home as I found myself on a plain of grass, its border of oak trees watches as I spouted every curse word I have in my mental dictionary. I gotta add limp-dicked son of a throat-singing thundercunt to my 'most creative swear word' list. But I'm not stupid, so I while I cursed, I take note of my surrounding. The first thing I did was reset my temp regulator, cuz this place is on full summer swing and I can feel myself slowly being cooked alive inside my suit.

I like where I end up at though, a fertile grass plain bordered by oak trees. The grass wasn't too long, which means a group of animals has been grazing this area. Animals' means food and leather, and the herb it eats might help me patch up the wound that surely comes later on. Healthy trees mean available bark and sticks as material, allowing me to build some equipment. The land was lush, which means a healthy amount of rain and sunlight is common here. So, water would've been a no-brainer. And you know the best part is? The road was well-trodden with traveller, the long wagon-wheel and horse track path gave me a direction to my next destination; human contact.

It was not a long journey, but damn it was a fucking memorable one. The moment I set a step forward was the moment I was assaulted from every side by Youkais. How do I know they're Youkais? If you can find me a human that has the tech to make herself into a sentient slime, I'll pay a king's ransom for it. I also find some girls clad in grey Victorian dress with huge brimmed hat, leaving trail of mucus behind like some kind of slug. But that's not the issue right now; they all wanted to rape me. Yes, as in fuck me senseless. How do I know that?

Their eyes told me everything.

They didn't make it subtle at all, fighting among each other for the honour of claiming me, all in some strange accented English too. I would've shot them dead, if not for the fact that I didn't know if they're a cosplayer or not. Last thing I need is for me to accidentally shot a civilian roleplaying their strange kink.

I took a look around while they were arguing, and saw a village at the corner of my eyes. Seeing the opportunity, I leave them all to dust as I quickly re-enacted the Battle of Stalingrad with the role of a charging Russian. URA!

I've been to hell and back, so a simple sprint won't faze me, so I ran all the way from my landing zone to where I am now, a village named Iliasville. All the way, harassed by other monster girls in my path, slimed by blue slimes and slipped on mucus left behind by slug girls. But I made it, albeit dirty and gooey, but still alive and still unmolested.

Iliasville looks…homely. That's the word, Homely. I felt a certain nostalgic emotion welling up inside me as I greeted the astonished green-haired youth at the gate. I don't know; I felt like I've returned home after all the time of travelling solo. I knew this is not my hometown; the guide makes it clear that this is a different village. But I still can't shake the feeling off…

The village is traditional-looking village sets in a medieval time, or so how I saw it. The large church situated behind the village looked more like Greek to me, but I'm a shooter, not a goddamn architect. The guards wear European metal armour with distinctive bucket helmet design. They also carry spears and shield, as if they never heard of guns. Either this entire town is having their Renaissance Faire hosted today, or I am in Europe.

The guard stopped me from entering, for good reason too. Imagine a dude in full-black jumpsuit charging balls to the walls at you with a rifle in hand like he gonna personally clobber your ass with it. We had an argument because the dude just won't let me in. I waved some cash in his face, but he looked so fucking confused that even I got confused too. I admire people with integrity, but to literally not know how money looks like?

Just as I was about to scream for the manager, the head village chief came by and asked me what's the issue was. He invited me in for tea inside his house, so I obliged. Guy lived with his old wife who brew a bomb-ass tea. Like seriously, this shit hits harder than Meiling on a bad day! I could feel my pain literally melting away at every gulp. She probably mixed in some magic shit in there as well. Now with tea in hand and a good company to share it, our little conversation began.

While I was worried that they might question my sanity, I found myself questioning it myself as I listened to the great tale of this land. Once upon a time, there was a powerful god by the name of Ilias who creates the world and everything inhabits it. But one of her creations, a certain Monster Lord decides that she wants more power, so she decides to fight back. Not ripping off Lucifer's battle against Gabriel, the Monster Lord was destroyed, leaving its monster brethren to roam the world as punishment for disobeying Ilias.

I wanted to laugh it off, I do. This reeks too much of a cheap Japanese porn. Goddess whose evil nemesis was a species of Monsters that just happens to look like voluptuous women, whom craved men's semen like they were the nectar of the gods? This Oji-san is screwing with me for sure. Yes, its much easier to believe that he's fucking around. But the amorphous blob of slime that I met when I woke up earlier…

The chief was a kind man; therefore, he decides to give me some gold coin and direct me toward the nearest inn for me to rest tonight. Seeing that I'm a strange man in a strange world, I figured I'll play along and see what happens. One thing for sure, unless these people are cultists somebody gonna break kayfabe sooner or later. And that's when I'll strike.

Nevertheless, I wanted to offer something as return, a work of some sort to repay the kindness they showed me today. It would not be right otherwise. Besides, I have a sinking feeling in my guts that my Japanese Yen and that emergency 100 American bucks tucked in my crotch would have much value at all.

No cash, little food, and utterly lost, not a good combination.

He told me that I should check out the temple if I desire direction. Now, I am not a religious man, but if there's one thing I know for sure, that place would've been busy as hell. This place so far followed a medieval approach, and knowing how important the church is back then, I reckon that I can find out more on where I am and how the hell I got here in the first place.

My suspicion proved to be true. I bet my left nut that half of the village's yearly income was used to maintain it only. It was build using white marble with impressive carving and architecture reminiscent to the Roman Empire. To be fair, their helmet and armour kinda reminds me of a Roman legionary anyway. The walkway was a shiny path of marble with illustration of the goddess that shone brightly against the evening sun. The people there was interesting, telling me bits and pieces about the world around me.

I was impressed when I entered the temple. It was way bigger in the inside than outside. The high sloped ceiling gave the impression of grandeur and space when it's actually not that tall. By making a gentle sloping dome with a crystal chandelier stuck in the middle of it can conveys the illusion of height and space when there is lacking in it. I can see the spiralling staircase going not too high from the ground, vindicating my deduction.

I spend my time speaking with the people in the group. Apparently, a crisis of faith has hit the country ever since the Renaissance as Ilias has stopped appearing in its true form. The faithful ones still remain here, ready to greet the goddess if god's willing. There's also the fact that a hero has been baptised here, allowing him to go on an adventure before I came.

I gotta admit, these people are good. The stories they tell is surprisingly interesting and has consistencies. One told me that if a Monster Girl successfully rapes you, she pours her dark energy in you so that your soul becomes hers. Another told me about how many types of Monster Girls there is in this world. It felt like I was actually in another world, with their own history and legend! It's like a long-running DnD session brought to life!

As I mingled among the congregation, I felt the eyes of the church guards and the priests boring down at my back. Why though? I haven't stolen anything and I know damn well that I have passed my 12th birthday. I asked one of their dudes in robes why though, I don't like being eyeballed like a new twink in the prison shower. Turns out they can read my level and shit, like this is some-kind of DnD crap me and the boys played back in the days, and they were torn between thinking of throwing me off the church ground or asking if I want to be one of their guards.

About damn time someone grew balls and talked to me. I was wondering how long before somebody comes and told me that my kar is not period-correct.

Guy looks tough; chiselled figure, grizzly beard, thick plate armour, and an intimidating longsword at his hip. he was in charge of training the guards here, considering how tired his eyes was, I assumed that it was a full-time job with no benefits. Guy looks like he does HEMA on an Olympic level. He looked me in the eye, and asked me how much people I've killed. Fucking roleplayers…

I asked him if he has any job I can do. Have cash, will travel, no cash? Stay home.

He told me that at the moment, there is no job posting here. But if I want to earn a pretty penny, I can wait until tomorrow. There's an exam/hazing ritual that's going to take place in a Cave of Trial or some shit, and they're low on staff. Normally they wouldn't do this, but something has jumped up and bitten every Monster Girls ass within 500 miles around us and has thrown themselves into every Tom Dick and Harry crossing whatever passes their fancy, with the emphasis of getting Dick.

On foot, it'll take me an entire day, but that time can be drastically decreased by wagon and horses. I made a mental note to seek out any mountain bicycle in every village I go to. I don't want to spend cash on extra food for the horse. Besides, I spent most of my time on something with a revving engine in, not something alive and has a pulse.

Pay's good, so I'll take it.

The gold coin the old man gave was puzzling as well. It is real gold! Well, maybe not fully gold. Maybe its an alloy, but no one can deny that there's some of those Atomic Number 79 in there. The fuck man? These people are fucking loaded! I saw those very coins being traded in the village square freely like they were paper money!

After checking out the village, I realized that I have everything that I needed for now. Sure, fresh food is nice to have in a pinch, but I don't have much cash on me to burn. I don't even have any coins to spend, other than the one the village head chief gave me earlier. Aside from preserved food, there's nothing else worth buying for.

I'm tempted to buy a sword and chant DEUS-VULT every day, but I'm more comfortable with a KA-BAR and a pistol at my side than an oversized knife.

Well, that's all for now for today's entry. I'm not gonna go to the cave yet, the sun has set and I as hell don't want to walk during the night when there is a warm inn that beckons me. Betty came by and already prepared a room for me, so its fine for now. The room is the least of my worries right now.

Hito's missing. I ain't seen his ass anywhere ever since we fell. My earpiece didn't pick up his signal, or anybody else's signal. I kept tapping on my phone, and all I got is no signal at all. So no outside world help for now. I shouldn't worry too much for Hito though, guy's very tough. But I can't help but felt a twinge of fear knowing that he's stuck in this crazy world all on his own. Compared to me, he's still wet behind the ears. Tomorrow I'll go out and do some jobs to get cash, then I'll go on a trip to find his sorry behind, or at least a signal to call for help.

So that's the story of my life today. One second, I'm climbing a mountain, the next I am running from a bunch of sex-crazy monster girls in a world where semen rules the world. Semen is love; semen is life.

I really need to lay off the Coke…