14xx/05/02 Johannes Calendar

Second day of my first arrival…

All right, here's the deal. I'm gonna write a journal entry after sundown before bed to record the thing that happened in the light of day, as shit can get really weird in just a few moments. If I died, maybe my words can still help other people avoid my fate.

Also, I'm still trying to get a grasp of this world's calendar, so don't expect me to write a precise date. My phone ain't got signal in this area either, so I'll just write down the day since I just came here.

All right, here we go.

Betty was a nice old woman; her kindly blue eyes manage to invoke the emotion of motherly love and safety. I felt obliged to help her out with the dishes after the delicious breakfast she gave me. It's been a while since I felt that kind of care anywhere. God, I miss my home already.

The guide was the same guard I met yesterday. He was a grizzly veteran, complete with a scar on his left eye. I noticed that he this time wore a Sallet helmet with a red feather attached to it. He carries a simple long sword and a heater shield with an illustration of a descending angel as armament.

The group that I've supervised is actually younger than I expected. Too young in fact, like they all are barely 18 at all. The guys have butterface though, so it was hard to remember any of them. Even the girls, which are marginally cuter than the average girls back in America, pales in comparison to my female Youkai bosses. The boys I have no problem with, it's the girls that makes me want to slam my head to the carriage over and over again.

For starters, what the fuck is up with what they wearing? The boys may not be creative with what they wear, but at least they wore proper leather armour, not skirts and low-cut shirts over leotard! Talk about anachronism, half of those bitches wore latex leotard and leather bikinis!

Naturally I protested against such bullshittery out of principle, but the guy I charge said that everything is fine, so I've no choice but to nut up and shut up. Some of them seems to be qualified enough, if the callous on their fists provide any indication of their skills. Then again, no number of skills can compensate for burned skin and ripped flesh, and their skin looks as soft as pudding.

I just have to keep my eyes open.

The travel to the cave is peaceful for sure, aside from the slime monsters that kept getting in our way. Youkais, no question about it. Tech hasn't reached that level yet and the only species I know can literally reassemble herself after being splattered all over the streets from moving carriage is Youkais. But what kind of Youkai though? Never seen any of it like this…

The Cave of Trials is even worse.

I mean holy shit, the outside looks peaceful enough, and there's even enough torches inside to at least let us fight in light, but they're like flies on shit, just swarming us all over like fucking Vietcongs. I thought that we stepped on the wrong neighbourhood, until one of my partners, a priest in green leotard and robe told me that this place is the right place. This is too much, even for mock HEMA!

So, we fought like devils; swords clashed with claws and teeth, arrows striking stones and flesh, bolts of magic melting slimes, and to the fewer of us, fist and foot meeting face and guts. I was one of those, throwing hands like I was in an all-out street brawl. Unless I know for sure that this is a first-world-contact situation, I will try to keep my hands clean.

The one that they call beast-type were marginally tough; but they still feel pain, and they catch these hands quite often. The others are softer, so a punch or two was good enough. I'm not sure why none of those punks wore armour though, if all it took is couple of good punches to the guts you would've think that wearing padded armour would be better instead of going commando.

And what the hell is wrong with their likeness with human female? How am I supposed to tell apart between a Rat Girl and a girl wearing a hat and long skirt? Most of them are only called Monster girls because they only have minor addition on their body. Who cares if they have a rat ears and tail anyway?

The Slime Girls were trickier. I am strong, but grappling amorphous blobs of slime is incredibly tiring and there's dozens of them. I was so upset that I actually shot one of them in face. A slime girl ends up with most of her face splattered across the cave wall, the large Mauser round produced strong kinetic force that tear off a huge chunk of her face. She just flails around like a headless chicken as the slime quickly slid back to the owner. And then one of the warriors accompanied me smashed a Slime Girl into puddle and watched as the girl slid away in defeat.

I just wasted a single bullet on a fucking mook.

As I was lamenting on my stupid mistake, something jumped on one of the cadets earlier in the level. I didn't see the girl; I see the fang. Little girl tries her best to escape my chokehold only to realize it was in vain. As a last resort, she lets out a whimper and weakly tapped my arm as a sign of surrender.

She has the body of a pre-schooler, she has dog ears, and she is looking at me with the cutest and most sorrowful stare I've ever seen. How can I be so cruel to a cute little girl? She gave me the cutest tail wag ever before running off into the oblivion. I felt an aching pain in my heart for the rest of the trip.

All and all, the trip was not remarkable. Yeah, it's true that we're fighting Youkais who wants our semen in a dungeon armed with medieval weaponries, but it's kind of getting old in extended trip. Bash head in, shoot some girls, spare some girls, open some chest, tries our best to not get raped… In the end it felt like the biggest chore of my life. I nearly screamed in ecstasy when we finally found the medal. Being ambushed over and over again was NOT fun.

All and all, we cleared the dungeon with no casualties and a raging boner to match with our swords. The captain was happy with his troop, declaring that they would be fitting for Ilias themselves in the future.

Well, he did fulfil his promise. He told me that I should head toward Iliasburg northeast of the village to properly stock up. It would be a day's journey through my two feet. I don't mind walking a long trek to another village, but seeing all this crazy shit that's gonna happen to me in my trek…

The wagon would depart to Iliasburg after depositing us toward the village. From there, I'll hitch a ride with a trade wagon all the way to Iliasburg. The journey would take a full daylight time to reach there. By the time we reached Iliasburg, it should've been around sundown. Nothing good comes out of the night.

Well, lo and behold! Our carriage broke its wheel when a large millipede girl just burst outta nowhere from the ground and tangled its long slimy tail onto our wheel. A brief fight later, we have to repair the wheel with what we got, all the while fending off the oncoming Monster Girls, which the broken wheel and the Millipede girl's attack function as a pseudo dinner bell. It took us a good hour and a half.

At the end of the day, we didn't manage to reach Iliasburg in time so we have to camp out at the road. I am now writing this while being on lookout for any other monster girls out there. I was used to the rigorous lifestyle of an explorer; therefore, such inconveniences mean little for me.

It was not that the most concerning matter in my mind. Where am I? What is this place? Who are these people? This is far too organized, far too natural to be kayfabe. Even Amish people weren't too into these…medieval aesthetics. Even the Youkais are far too different for me to recognize. Last I checked, they preferred blood over cum. What is going on?

Whatever it is, it won't break us. Compared to the Youkais back home, these so-called 'Monster Girls' are a cakewalk. I won't have to worry too much. We were close by and we fell into this world, so I'll assume he'll be close to me as well.

Just you wait, I'll find him in record time.

Alex Armin never breaks his promise…