14xx/05/25 Johannes Calendar
25 days since Arrival…
Equipped with new equipment and knowledge, I decided to set my foot on Nameless Slum to find more information on the whereabout of Hito. If there's one thing I can always rely on, it's that I can always find good shit in the underground. Latina said that I should be on my guard all the time as that place is filled with low-life and criminals. If I close my eyes just for the moment I can get robbed.
Yeah, that's why I always carry a gun and knife. That is no different than my everyday life. When everyone around you wanted a piece of your ass, a knife and a gun is your best friend in the whole wide world.
I just hoped that my intimidating suit and guide would at least keep the lowlife at bay. I need to keep my ammo count from going into the red.
Latina in her golden armour was surprisingly attractive. She was confident with her new weaponries and she said that she likes to test out her new weapon at the Slums. She said that there is a Phoenix Feather trafficking at the slums. She said that I can buy Phoenix Feather dirt cheap there. It is illegal, but nobody actually cared for a small crime ring in the middle of nowhere.
Another Harpy Feather and we found ourselves standing outside a village, or what's left of it. It was a mess. It was a collection of ramshackle building in a barren plain field surrounded by high mountain ranges. Its location rendered the area remote, and their only access to the outside world is a cave system connecting this land with the outside world. My guide said that the cave system was filled with challenging enemies; so many people just stay in the slums. Typical low-level thugs' behaviour; too cowardly to face true danger, too prideful to admit their weakness.
Several wooden buildings were situated in the inner sanctum of the slums. The slums were protected by several broken walls which is actually part of a bigger structure if it was never broken in the first place. The cinderblock walls were laughably uselessly broken. The only thing I can use them is to provide cover if I engaged the population in a shootout. Several tents were pitched in-between the area between each small cinderblocks, making the place suffocating small.
I saw a single tent which has the smell of semen that wafted from the tent's flapping canvas. I saw two men outside the tent, knocked out cold. I asked one of them why the fuck are they sleeping out in the open outside a cum-stained tent. They said that the tent is actually a Battle Fuck arena and they were hoping to win an artefact there. They lost because the bitch in there is very good in what she did.
I'm not gonna risk a Critical Ecstasy for a simple bracelet, so I pass.
I found a bar that is dilapidated. The wooden walls were covered with slime and kelp, and it was not from a Slug Girl, or even Slime Girls. The sharp smell of alcohol and ammonia wafted from the tavern door. I reluctantly walked inside with my guide trailing behind me.
The tavern was dirty and cluttered by several broken furniture, but there are several other people sitting at the counters, drinking yellow bubbly beer from large glass. I ordered a beer that tasted like hot piss and asked the bartender of the shits going on in this hellhole.
First thing that happened is that some weird-ass dude from Iliasville came up and busted up the local Phoenix-Feather operation, so all prices for that shit is now through the roof, oh and the guy who looked like Hito also tagged along with that purple-haired hero or some shit. Last he heard; they were going to the broken-down ruins of a castle nearby. It's called Castle Mithra, but its ancient history by now. He also said that I shouldn't even think of going there. Apparently, that place is haunted because nobody ever returned alive. Even if they do, there's not enough loot to justify the risk considering all of it was lost back during the Great Monster War or some shit.
According to history, the angels cursed the area to remain fruitless and arid so that nothing can ever thrive in this area ever again except vagabond like them. Yes, some of the olden kings wanted to come back and reclaim this area, but the cost of rebuilding was simply too high; food and water has to be brought in from the outside, and the area is simply too hot to plant crops or build anything substantial.
I asked him of the person who has seen the castle first-hand. Apparently, it's a girl named Don Dahlia; the same guy who got their ass kicked by the visiting hero. He said that I can find her in a tent nearby.
I found Don Dahlia in a tent, serving a man with her armpit. I literally jumped back when I saw the meat tube wedged between her arms. I don't know the squirting distance of a semen blaster and I don't have protective armour for my face either. So, I jumped out of the tent like a bat out of hell.
A loud, lust-filled scream came from inside the tent, penetrating both my ears and my guide's ears. Minutes later, the same young man stumbled out of the tent, his gait was clumsy and his face was dirty and pale. His trousers were hastily applied to his own leg, which were getting even lower every second. The young man wages a war of attrition with gravity as he tries his best to stay upright. Gravity wins the round, and the young man fall face-first into the ground, his bare bum finally shows its ugly face as the youth's loosely-fitting trousers fell off his legs. I resisted the urge to kick it, its bad form to laugh at other's misfortune no matter how pathetically funny it is.
I slowly entered the tent, my eyes scanning the tent for weapons in case of a fistfight. I left my rifle with Latina. I observed the woman's appearance. She has a short, scruffy hair that shines bright copper despite the shade inside the tent. She wore a simple red trainer bra and short torn jean which slouches dangerously low around her hip. Her half-lidded blue eyes stared at me with a certain greediness always seen in a criminal's eye.
How many times have I saw similar eyes fade away?
I asked her where if she ever saw Hito, and she said that she did saw him. In fact, she can see him clearly because he almost snapped her arms trying to defeat her. She said that the guy probably went to check out the Castle nearby.
I asked her if she ever went to that place. She said that she went there, and she didn't like it. It's probably infested with all kind of MGs, and there's nothing much to loot. She went there at first to find out if they still hidden their legendary weapons in some kind of secret hidey-hole or some shit. She only found two things; jacks and shit.
She also offered me a ticket of some sort, which allows me to have some alone time with her. I seriously have no reason to tap that ass. Who knows how much STD she got lurking just in her armpit after days of rubbing it on ten sausages every fucking day? I bid her farewell and meet up with Latina, telling her that my buddy is probably at the castle nearby.
I asked Latina if she ever explored that area. She didn't so the Harpy Feather wouldn't help at all, so she has to walk. I asked her if she can make the trip. In response, she just sighed and took off like a bat out of hell with me at the back hollering like I'm T.E. Lawrence catching a train in Egypt.
Anyway, it took us just around a few minutes of riding just to reach the broken-down castle. The outer walls were broken in several places as if it was bombarded by cannons and trebuchet in its last day. The brown stone blocks littered the area in and around the castle courtesy of the broken wall. Despite its apparent uselessness I believe I can rebuild the wall with some help if I need somewhere to hide out.
The inner sanctum of the castle was surprisingly hollow, which I assumed was the work of the previous looters and besieger of this castle in the past. What remains of the castle is an impressive stone ruins that somehow still capable of providing shelter if needed. While the walls were cracked and dirty, it still rocks solid under my observation, which is a relief. I don't want it to crumble just when I was about to go to sleep.
I opened the large double mahogany door at the end of the main hallway. Instead of a throne room, I was greeted by a series of pedestal surrounding a single square structure in the middle of the room. I observed one of the altars that surround the square structure. It was simply a block of rectangular raised stone with an inscription underneath the furniture.
Piercing Moon Spear, dedicated for the quick.
There was an indentation in the rectangular block that should've held the spear in question, which is currently missing in action. Knowing that crying over spilt milk was useless I decided to investigate the rest of the pedestals in this particular room.
Star Rhyme Staff, dedicated for the pure…
It cannot be tainted if it never exists in the first place.
High Lotus Bow, dedicated for the righteous…
Who decides who is right, the bow? I'm not gonna take a weapon that questions everything about my life already, that's my job.
Flickering Dust Dagger, for the skilful…
Anybody who trained long enough can be a master, and I knew I trained for a long time. If only it was there for me to take it…
Power Wave Axe, for the proud…
What happen if the user secretly ashamed of himself?
Four Ruins Katana, dedicated for the serene…
My mind is a constant state of madness and chaos that can only be calmed through motion and Coca Cola. Excuse me, I gotta take another sip.
Whip of the Immortal, dedicated for the noble…
What? A whip is traditional BDSM equipment, and nobles usually partake in much more gentlemanly conquest. If a whip is dedicated to an immortal, then does it mean it was to be used by an immortal noble BDSM enthusiast?
Dark Thunder Scythe, dedicated for the sharp…
Speaking of sharp, I really need to polish my knife more. It got slimed and gooed every second I'm in this mad land.
Tremor Sword, dedicated for the valiant…
How can a valiant knight use a sword if he was shaking so badly while using it?
Thunder Retribution Fist, dedicated for the passionate…
NEVER STOP FIGHTING! RUSH B! CYKT BLAT! FOR MOTHER RUSSIA! NOT ONE STEP BACKWARD!
Disaster Sentence Great Sword, dedicated for the intense…
My birth was one of my most intense disasters that have ever happened to me…
Flowing Sky Strong sword, dedicated for the fierce…
Wait, so you're telling me all the previous sword before you is just a weak virgin sword? How am I supposed to know that there's such thing as a chad strong sword?
Foolish Beast Fang, dedicated for the wild…
Whoever broke off its tooth to use as a handheld weapon is damn foolish.
Chirping Fang, dedicated for the beautiful…
Can fang chirp?
Soaring Bird's Throwing, dedicated for the inquisitive…
Nani the fuck? What is it? It is a throwing star, or a throwing tomahawk? Maybe a short sword? Dagger? Boomerang? What the fuck am I supposed to throw with? A literal fucking bird?! Is that it? Am I supposed to throw literal pigeons around?!
…Holy shit, I am asking so many damn questions over a non-existent weapon. That is a very powerful weapon…
Crimson Roar Sword, dedicated for the honourable…
Honour died in Passchendaele.
Soul Revival Blade, dedicated for the concealed…
Maybe that's why it was invisible?
Gun of Soul Howl, dedicated for the firm…
Firm what? Firm chest? Firm thighs? Or firm ass? And if so, what kind of gun? Laser gun? Magic gun? Bolt-action? Semi-auto? Automatic? Blowback? Break-action? Pump-action? Derringer?
Ring world's magic Staff, dedicated for the enlightened…
I have so many fucking dirty jokes I can make with this staff already, and it doesn't even exist!
Each of them was dedicated to certain individuals with certain virtue with corresponding weapon type. While each of them has different virtue and type, they all shared one distinct trait shared by all of such legendary weaponries… Missing.
Yep, like Hito's legendary dick size it was still a legend, something that might not be real at all. You can argue that it's real, how can you make a pedestal for something that does not exist?
Parody, representation, worship, any fucking reason other than existing. Do you know how many representations of Heaven in all religion that exists over the past millennium? And we don't even know if it actually exists! So many bloody crusades happened just to defend something that might not even exist at all! Who knows?
Each of them probably was erected in symbolism of some great warriors in the past with different weapon type, hence why each pedestal said different things. Hero worship and beliefs can make human do crazy shit in the past; I doubt it that it's any different here.
Even if these weapons actually exist, they might probably be looted first and foremost. For all I know those weapons were the reason why the sieges of the castle in the past took place in the first place!
Stressing over a weapon that was missing won't do me any good, so I decided to explore the living shit out of the castle.
The castle was broken down, most of the hallways and room were filled to the brim with rubble from the past sieges. My guide waited at the weapon pedestal room as her large body prevents her from doing some good ol' urban exploring.
The castle was big, bigger than I expected. I managed to climb over a large mountain of rubble that collapsed in a hallway, revealing the noon sky. I managed to get to the second floor, which took the brunt of the abuse. So many gaping holes dotted the stone floor to the point of it being literally a valley of death. Several wooden beams still hold strong among the chasm, which I applaud their determination as I used them as my jumping pad.
Jumping from one beam to another like a frog, I make my way to the royal chamber. Nothing was left up here, not even a curtain to cover their windows. I bathed in the light of the sun; the pure white glow illuminated the room where kings of higher standing have slept in the past. The said bed which the king might sleep on is barren too, not even the mattress was spared. This is bullshit! It took me some acrobatic skill to get up here, how the hell this room wasn't spared?!
A single creak behind me got my attention. I quickly jumped to the side and aimed my rifle at the door, waiting to take out the would-be intruder. It was Latina herself. She was bored, so she went out of the room and went around the castle. She found a relatively intact staircase that connects to the rest of the level. Using said staircase brought her here to the damned room I was in.
So, I can just practically skip all the parkour just by taking a stair?
On second thought, when did I ever turn down a parkour opportunity? (Its fucking cool!)
Looking outside, I saw the walls that protect the castle from its attacker so faithfully in the past outside the window. While the cracks that dotted the walls were filled with moss and mildew, the rock wall still looks formidable against any invading enemy despite the years. I wondered what length the attacker went to finally breach this impregnable barricade.
Probably an 8-pound iron cannonball from black heavy iron cannon.
I realized that there is more of the castle, so I decided to explore the area of the castle much more thoroughly.
Not much can be seen around or even the outside of the castle. Anything worth of value has been stripped away, leaving behind empty training field and rubble-littered courtyard. The royal garden at the back of the castle is now an overgrown forest teeming with life. The only thing that signifies its original purpose is a pair of broken arches. The stone arches are a part of a gate that might have been the entrance of the garden itself. Creepers snake around the stone pillar, signifying the amount of time passed ever since the fateful day.
Latina advised against going in as that place would be filled with Monster Girls.
I decided to walk around the castle, see if there's anything I've missed. I found a military training ground, just a circle of clear dirt ground surrounded by low wooden fences. I also saw a strip of clear ground that I believe they used to joust in the past tournament and training. The only trinket I found was a simple copper sword, scratched and dented to oblivion. Several dark splotches of old black blood dotted the blade and its handle, signifying its last use in the defence of this castle. But no one is in the castle.
That's right; nobody was in or around the castle, not evens their skeleton.
That disturbs me more than ever. Judging from what I gleaned from my previous exploration conquest, there should be around one type of Monster Girl for every form of living and dead thing in this world. My guide even said that there is a possibility that there is a Skeleton Girl type around here. If that's the case, then should it be like a freaking army of skeleton defending this place, like how they did in the past? Or are they were hiding in the castle, just waiting for me to drop my guard?
Fuck, now I'm fucking paranoid.
Aside from that sword, nothing else existed there, not even patches of blood to signify a struggle. What happened? Was the inhabitant of Mithra was attacked by a force so strong that it even obliterates the remaining corpses of the defender? If so, who were the attackers? A powerful magician who casted spells so strong even a drop of blood was not spared? Or an army of ghoul so ravenous that even the bones and blood of the defender were ravenously consumed by the attacker, down to the last man?
Looking at the training field, I have a strange sense of nostalgic in my heart like I have been here before. My mind then wondered far, my imagination starts to picture the scene of the castle before its destruction. A group of soldiers, lounging around the circle as they watch the young fighters in the ring spar with their foot and fist. Two stable boys standing at the now derelict hut, watching the sparring soldier with a certain envy unnoticeable by any. At the west of the training ground, a princess is standing by, watching her warrior duke it out for her amusement.
Imagination is one hell of a hallucinogen. I can even hear the roar of laughter as one of the stable boys accidentally stepped on horseshit as he tries to get a closer look. The same stable boy smiled sheepishly as he proceeds to walk back into the stable, but his eyes of adoration is unnoticed by the smiling princess with blue hair, whom was amused by the turn of event.
Turns out, it was a fucking hallucination as I suddenly felt a sharp pain on my chest. The vision quickly dispersed, revealing a loop of green vine wrapped around my torso. I raised my head to witness the antagonist.
My new enemy this time is a double bitch cake in a rafflesia. I recognized the flower as its four red and white petals were unique to one flower only, and that is the carnivorous plant. Emerging from the hole in the middle of the flower is two naked women from breast to the top of the head. Below the breast are just chitins armour of green and a bed of pistils, undulating at the thought of its new victim. A host of green tentacles sprouted from the same hole, which were restraining my lovely horse companion's body.
The bastard slowly brought me toward its direction, intent on swallowing me alive. I struggled as hard as I can and managed to get my right arm out of the bind to grab my knife. Quick as a lightning, I slashed my restrain, eliciting a shriek from the woman. Her grip instinctively tightens, eliciting a yelp of pain from my weary bones. Desperate and in pain, I hacked away at my binding, hoping that she'll let me go. The third cut did the trick, and I fell into the sweet ground.
My guide manages to distract the flower thing by wiggling like a madman, giving me more time to react. Rolling away from her tentacle, I quickly snatched the same copper sword I found earlier. I knew that the only thing it was good for as a missile, so I threw it at her. The woman caught the sword and tossed it away. The distraction allows my guide to escape, letting her fell down on her knees.
I quickly pumped her full of .45 right at her chest, hoping that it might hurt her. The effect is just as I expected, a spray of green blood spurted from each bullet holes, effectively weakening the rafflesia girl.
My guide in unison then picked up her golden spear and skewered the girl at her back, puncturing them both in a line. She screamed one last time before slumping down into the dirt dead as a doornail. We survived another ambush, and I survived another rape attempt.
After picking up a handful of gold and a harpy feather from its dust, we decided that we have enough of this castle, so we decided to book it.
Before I could will it, I heard a faint whisper at the back of my head, telling me to get back to the royal chamber. Latina insists that it was just the flower's hallucinogen that was playing a trick on me, she said that we should get back to Iliasville as fast as possible.
The whisper became stronger, and I found myself unable to deny its demand. My guide simply said 'fuck it' and just tagged along.
Following my instinct, I returned to the chamber. The chamber was still empty, but a growing feeling in my heart told me that it was not the case. I proceed to examine every part of the room again, but this time with much more consideration in detail. My inquisitive nature pays off, and I found a loose brick right underneath a wooden bed. Inside the cavity was a note detailing the direction of a secret vault within the royal dungeon.
My curiosity is on fire now, so I followed the direction and descended back to ground level. This time, I took the stairs.
After a long winding path through a series of interconnected hallway, I encountered a simple wooden door. It doesn't look much; just a simple door consisted of planks and iron. The door was unlocked, so I let myself in. The door was small, but the room inside it was not. My guide can follow me this time, albeit with little difficulty.
A long row of cold, bleak cell block greets me. What do I expect in a motherfucking dungeon? It was dark, so I equipped my lighter to relight the torches in the room, hoping that it's decade old fuel still operational. The flame each torch gave out is dim, but it does not mean I am working in stark darkness anymore. But goddamn this is creepy. The poor lighting of the dungeon casted multiple menacing shadow across the hallway, giving it an ominous look matched with its implied past usage. My mind starts to play more tricks now. I swore I can hear some chains rattling in some cells…
It was time for my shoulder lamp to shine baby! My walk throughout this world has kept the battery fed, and now it shone as bright as the sun itself. Thankfully, Latina can follow me into the chamber so I have another set of hands in case of ambush. Her presence is soothing, unlike the dried blood on the chains in the walls. The lack of bone and bigger blood splashes makes it even more unnerving to me.
A strong smell of mildew and decay assaulted my nostril as I approach a door. My fear is now having a war of attrition with my curiosity. Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back with a vengeance. My curiosity won the war, and I claimed the prize. The door swung inward, showing anything but danger. It was just a simple office, nothing more. A table and a chair sit at the corner of the room beside a bookcase, something that I found strange considering its new position.
The bookcase presumably original position is right in front of me where I stood from the door, the only sign is a gaping maw of darkness and mildew. The smell of death was coming from the abyss, like a dead rat caught inside a toilet's pipe. The smell was strong, my eyes watered due to the sharp smell of rot from the hole. Fear became a beast of no nation, scrambling helter-skelter and screaming in the Town of Logic and Emotion that a plague of pain and suffering is near, unless I chose to turn away.
But Curiosity is the dictator of the nation, and Fear was once more banished into the pit of Mind by Courage and his valiant warriors. Latina whinnied quietly behind me, afraid of the consequence of my foolhardy adventure, yet I persevere.
The long beam of light penetrates the short tunnel of doom the abyss offered me. A simple path of smooth stone offers me the way forward, but the arches of stone above me frowned upon my conquest. With careful step I put my foot forward…and another one after that…and again…
I found myself at the source of the smell, and it wasn't pretty…
A large lavish hall was carved out from the underground granite stone, several motifs of unknown deities' watches over me at every overlapping arch above me. Rows of tall bookshelves formed a circle to the smooth grey arena in the middle of the room. The bookshelves were empty, saves for a few skeletons.
The circular arena was piled up with corpses, both old and new. Most of it was mercifully a pile of skeletons, its bone scattered across its fleshier brethren. Some of them were rotting, their flesh sports black sores and bruises as the decomposing process starts to kick in. Black blood draped most of the corpses in the room; its fresh red state coagulates into black from weeks unburied.
Some were strangely fresh; their blood has just started to coagulate from time. Some part of them was still scarlet, the red blood envelopes them like a lover's embrace. Each and every wound the corpses bear oozes blood in several different colours. Fuck, some of them even has green blood! It was soon explained by the feature on its body. It was a Monster Girl, a species that I never encountered yet. It has a lower body of a watermelon, yet it has the upper body of white, blonde woman. Her throat was slit open in a wide, green smile as I examine its sorry corpse. Most of the cadavers sports some kind of armour in various state of damage, ranging from being ripped to shit to clean as fuck. Several weapons were strewn across the room, ranging from simple sword to gigantic axes to some ridiculous weaponry. What kind of dude would carry a dildo to combat?!
Of course, it wasn't a dude, the damn thing was in a dead imp's hands! Her large breasts which once entices many, now lain there uselessly, covered in dried blood and pus. Her glazed eyes stared back at my own as I examined the wound on her neck. A long, wide smile was carved on the poor creature's throat. In her left hand holds a long, phallic brown rod in the shape of a penis. It has a sword handle as it was suggested that the user might use them like a proper sword. If a slit throat was not good enough, her forehead was also beaten bloody by blunt instrument, which probably was the dildo the imp was currently carrying. Beaten to death by a dildo…Not a good way to go…
I prayed what prayer I knew for the dead as a sign of respect, not caring if my god of the old world exists in this world. There is certain decorum that must be shown to the dead and deceased. It is highly disrespectful to disturb the dead. It may sound hypocritical coming from yours truly, but even I never go beyond looting corpses.
Something else took my attention, this time it was a sword on a pedestal. Not stuck in stone slab like Excalibur, but like an artefact on display on a museum. It is a simple longsword built with expensive materials and engraving technique. I saw archaic magical runes inscribed in gold at the fuller of the dull steel blade. The golden cross guard has two gemstones attached to the edge of the solid cross guard respectively, Ruby at the left, sapphire at the right like a pair of eyes. The leather guard seems to be made of dark leather, with the pommel being non-existent.
I would flip a table if there's such thing as a Sword Girl. We have Roper Girl, why not have Monster Girls that looks like sword? Or hell, maybe a subspecies of Monster Girls that looks like real weaponries? I mean, we do have Monsters that looks like your everyday chest, what's the possibility of having a type of Girls that looks like every day implement? Pretty damn high in my book.
I slowly approach the blade. Slowly, gentle like a motherfucking butterfly. What chances of the corpses in this room die because they killed each other? If that did happen, I'll flip another table and flip from said table while screaming Snoop Dog's name in Ice Cube's voice (SNOOOPDOOOGGGG!) The gentle glow of my flashlight illuminates my step, allowing me to detect any oncoming traps. So far, every tile looks solid, no slim thread stretching across thin air…
I finally reached the sword. There was an inscription on the sword. Use the sword only when you need to. I reached for the sword…and stopped. The question is legit. Why would I need a sword? My current weaponry is good enough for my travel, and it will be good once I upgrade it with some good shit later. My knife, while short is hard and rugged unlike that sword. That thing will snap once I tried using it to cut wood with. Plus, I don't have the time or the skill to learn how to use a sword, let alone carry it everywhere. That thing doesn't even have a sheathe. How the fuck can I carry that weapon without cutting myself?
That thing does not belong in a battlefield, it belongs to a museum. It is a piece of art that is unfit to be sold like a common sword. It belongs here, in its own gallery with its morbid guardian to admire it for eternity until the next soul stumble upon this work of art…
And also, there's a high chance that it was rigged with a pressure-sensitive trap.
Aaannnddd there's a pair of skeletons were standing a few feet behind me.
No shit, a pair of skeletons just stood motionless just a metre away, staring deep into my soul with their empty socket. One wore a tattered red royal tunic over a suit of rusted iron armour. It's cracked dome was adorned by a single gold crown; its single ruby shone brightly in the hall. Its companion wore a dirty and frayed blue dress. It wore a simple silver crown instead. By skeleton figure and clothing, I figured they might've been royalty or something.
I did what a man in a room together with a potentially cursed weapon, a pile of corpse, and a pair of animated skeletons would do; scream like a little bitch and shot one of them clean in the face. Or tried to, as the ruby on the king's crown flashes just for a second, and the satisfying image of a bullet penetrating its cranium was averted by magic.
To add the craziness in a hand basket, the king then spoke to me. Spoke, like how a normal dude would use their lips and tongue to vocalize their thoughts, even though he has no lips or tongue! First off, I was surprised by their appearance, and I was surprised that I was surprised of seeing them there. After weeks of living in this mad world I should've seen this coming. Second, I can understand everything he says. He was speaking English as if he was a native speaker. All the others out here spoke English with a strange Japanese accent, but this guy has a very Anglo accent; British, Americans, Germans, if he tries, he can mimic any Anglo accents with ease.
I was scared, yet I hold my ground like a badass. Where would I go if I end up in a fight? Climb on top of the bookshelves? The skeleton king assured me that they meant no harm for me, for I have not touched the blade yet. Yeah, kind of hard to believe that when I am standing next to a pile of CORPSES…
They said that they are the kings and queen of this beautiful domain before it was ravaged to pieces by Ilias in the first Great Monster War. This castle and its domain were famous for their symbiotic relationship of Weapon Girls, a subspecies of Monster Girl unique to the domain of Mithra. Weapon Girls has two forms; weapon mode and girl mode. Weapon mode is when they change to their respective weapon type (i.e., Sword Girl turns to actual sword) which can be used by their respective partner. Most of their strength comes from their weapon state, which is incredibly useless if not wielded by anybody.
The man of Mithra fits the role as a Weapon Master, wielding said Monster Girl to combat. In exchange for the power the girls gave to them, the men took care of them like queen. In Girl form they were interchangeable between a real human being. Many men were married to their weapon, for every Weapon is a beautiful Weapon in the right hand.
Sadly, this beautiful relationship between men and Monster Girls enraged Ilias, which was already enraged by the atheist attitude of the inhabitants. Many people, including him view her as needlessly racist against the Monsters. Did she not give them life to begin with? Why would she hate her own creation and made it beautiful, only to destroy it later?
…Did a skeleton ask the most logical question regarding this world's religion?
This domain was one of her chief interests, as she wants to put an example against the 'Monster-loving heretic' as she said it. As many Monster Girls made their home here, and some has relatives outside the domain, the kingdom of Mithra was fiercely defended by its inhabitant against overwhelming odds. Despite superior number, the Angels cannot penetrate the thick wall that surrounds the whole region…until a hailstorm of holy light blasted them to kingdom come.
To say that the timing of the attack is too convenient might suggest that there is some foul play involved in all this, but the only thing the king desires for is his subject to persevere, and a peculiar foxy general plan allows his subject to do just that. The whole country was evacuated within days, teleported to a huge monster base somewhere far away while the angels tore at their walls and rained fire from above.
As the final pair has escaped, the enchantment that holds the barrier apart was broken, and the holy army surged in, razing anything that the hailstorm doesn't touch. The attack was so powerful, the siege so gruelling, that the normally green hills of the area were turned to a craggy wasteland devoid of life except the one who can survive the harshest condition. The only thing that still marks the existent of a formerly powerful kingdom is a ruined castle and the ruin of a former town. The queen beside him said that she was sad that such a pretty town became a cesspool of lowlife and criminal, and not the elegant type either!
The legendary weapons then were teleported back to the Monster Lord's base. The pedestal then was erected hastily with dummy replica to placate the Angel's suspicion. The weapon was also filled with some magic to make it look like the real deal. That raises a new question; is this sword behind me was a fake?
The king laughed once, a low echoing noise that will haunt my sleep in the next few weeks at most. He said that the weapon behind me is the real deal, for it has a purpose hidden deep underneath here. I asked him what the purpose is. Guess what? It's me.
Yup, the general was also a strange seer that can 'predict' the future and stuff. He said that Ilias will fall, and a brief period of peace will soon follow. But beware! For great dangers will soon come, and a hero shall rise where an intense battle of unfathomable proportion shall be fought. This hero will be accompanied by men and women of all walk of life, united in arms and spirits against the encroaching darkness.
But before the end times arrive, the hero will have an ally who commands an army of kings, all armed with weapons and tactics borne from the mind of this genius commander. In his arrival, a dead kingdom will rise from its grave and help him raise armies to create a bulwark against terror, his warriors will crush any evil that harms the innocent with thunder, lightning and falling stars.
The sign of his arrival should be marked by a flash of potent magic, strong enough to stimulate the Monster into action, and the commander bearing fire and steel will come from the flash. Until that time comes, the Royal Family of Mithra will keep the sword that signify symbol of authority safe from outside hand for as long as they can. They have waited for untold amount of time, generations grew and dies, kingdom rise and fell, and here they wait, waiting for their liege to arrive.
I am the person he was waiting for.
I badly want to call this a bald-faced lie, a fucking cheap trick to drop my guard and kick my ass. How can I buy such a ridiculous story like that? Just as I thought I found somebody with at least a little common sense, this pops up out of nowhere and reminds me that THIS IS ILIA!
I wanted to decline at first, citing that I have no need for such weapon. When they asked why I would decline such an heirloom, I stated out of honour. Would they be comfortable with their blade being used to do heinous shit later on? That didn't work, so I decided a practical approach; I simply don't have a room for an overpriced sheet of metal that I have no idea on how to use properly.
The king was stubborn as all hell, so I decided to get it over with by touching the blade. It's not like there's anything special about it other than its precious ore.
Boy was I wrong.
Sorrow, anger, regret, loneliness; they were familiar emotions, sometimes small, but often heavy and soul-crushing. I felt the blade's emotion strongly within the touch, and I realised that the king is offering her not out of obligation, but out of pity.
She wants to forget, to start anew, to get away from her tomb. She didn't even want become a sword anymore.
I looked at the king and asked him who she is. He said that the blade's name is Devotion, and she once belonged to his most loyal knight in his kingdom. The knight fell in battle and the blade were salvaged by his best friend to be interred in this tomb for safekeeping. Unfortunately, the stress of losing her most beloved one and her home proved too much for her.
The king offered to transfer her spirit into my weapon, freeing her from this imprisonment at the cost of erasing the memory of her previous master. He grew weary of standing vigil over Devotion, and wished to fulfil his promise to the foxy general that preserved the last of her kind in this world. He assured me that her value will remain constant, even rise tremendously if she was mine.
I weighed the pros and cons, and decided to fuck it all to hell and let them do their magic.
I don't know what happened much really; the two started chanting in tongues, then their amulets around their neck started to glow. Then it fires a bright red laser that engulfed the sword, and the blade shuddered before a thick red cloud of pure concentrated soul energy flew from the sword and into my rifle. I watched in awe as my rifle metamorphosize right underneath my nose.
The wooden stock and body of the rifle became charcoal black with soft leather grip carefully riveted into the wooden stock of the rifle itself, making it much more comfortable to hold. The metal receiver and barrel were clad in shiny platinum and engraved with gold depictions of the Battle of Berlin in the style of a flowing, flowery pattern. The scope is now a more modern sniper rifle scope with a much thicker construction than before.
As I raise my rifle to bear, I saw all manner of living things through the scope. Several greyish green silhouettes appeared through the scope when I aimed above me; most of it was rodents and Mice Girls. Latina's silhouette was bright green with blue spot over her human heart. I can't help but grin like an utter madman as I observed the her through the magical glass. I have a fucking life-seeking scope! That means, nothing is safe from my bullet anymore. I can see what you did behind thick walls!
It worked only as far as the rifle scope can go, which is 4 times magnification. That should be around 400 yards at least. Having it adjustable allows me to hunt on any circumstances or ranges. The bolt itself felt very smooth and light as if the entire firing mechanism has been greased to hell and back and the bolt got ball bearings to make it even smoother. It felt strange at first not feeling the solidness of the patented Mauser pattern, but the buttery smoothness of its mechanism has planted its seed in my heart, and I can see myself loving it in the future.
But the question that always plague my mind returned back to me, asking the same thing again. Did I do the right thing?
As if an angel heard my question, I suddenly heard a whisper at the back of my head, or rather, inside my mind. It was soft and sweet, like a memory of a lover's voice. "Thank you" she said to me. With that said, I felt a slight gust of wind passed over me. A name has been inscribed into my memory.
Sophie.
I then turn my attention at the royal skeleton couple. They said that they want to follow my example and travel across their own continent, hoping that they might restore it to former glory. I asked them what of the bodies that was just lying around. They told me that they will finally dispose them, as their original purpose of scaring away intruder was exhausted by my appearance. They said that other than the blade, everything in this castle belongs to them.
How can I say to them that their castle is fucking empty?
Latina was vastly surprised by my new rifle. She said that it felt like a soul was transferred to my rifle. She said that anything that have a soul transferred to a weapon makes them either a cursed weapon or a Monster, but she said that she never met a Monster Girl that took the form of a weapon.
I told her to keep her eyes open for more of them.
After some calculation, I realised that the price of Ilias Herbs is much cheaper in Iliasville. I needed more healing items on the run, so I decided that my next warp would be back to that homely village.
The same green-haired youth exclaimed that I look much more powerful than before, that I must have fought some crazy shit out there. He also asked me if my exploration was tiring, lewd or fun. I told him it was a gumbo of those three qualities which is promptly swallowed by a unicorn that proceeds to fart and vomit rainbows. Latina slapped me over my head, saying that it was insensitive considering her race. My rifle made a slight giggle.
I walked over to the same convenience store I visited in the past few days. He welcomed me with a smile, saying that I have returned safely to buy more stuff from him. While I was not a native of this village, everybody treats me like I lived here half my life. To be fair, this place does have a certain homely aura familiar to me…
After buying more feathers, I asked him if there's any news about my buddy Hito. Apparently, he and the hero Luka did make a quick stop here, but they were buying up almost his entire stock because they went to the Lost Wood days ago. He spoke the name of the wood with reverence and terror, as if it was some kind of dormant monster. I'm not afraid though. I survived the Red Forest of Chernobyl, so bring it on cyka!
He said that he knew next to nothing about the local area because everybody only visited the Temple for healing and Job changing, and not many people ever returned from Lost Wood. I bought some Ilias herbs and Harpy Feather just in case.
I met the old village chief again just for a surprise visit. The old couple were happy to see me, saying that I've grown pretty strong along the way. Both of them have failing eyesight, so I read out the past entry of my journal loudly. They laughed half the time, frowned at the swear word (I toned down the swears, but no amount of soap can wash away my fucking potty mouth…oh fuck) and hung their head at serious moments. They assured me that what I did back in Pornof's mountain was a good thing to do, and that I did the right thing, despite my insistence that I could've done better. The granny on the other hand scolded me for being way too reckless, saying that I'm 'not some hero chosen by the gods to save the world'. How curious, the way the chieftain smiled at his wife's sentence. I don't mind the scolding though, it felt good for some reason.
They were surprised by how well-mannered my guide buddy was, saying that she was a good Centaur to help me out on my journey. The granny told her to keep an eye on me to make sure I didn't do stupid shit. I have not the heart to tell them what I did back in Nameless Slum. She also reminded me that while she can't predict who I end up with, having sex with a Monster girl is taboo, so I should not get any ideas. Latina laughed at that remark, saying that I never have even a slightest feeling of lust for her.
We agreed silently to not mention how many times she sucked me off throughout my journey.
I asked them about the lauded hero I heard in the past, called Luka or something. Their smile widens, as if I am talking about their grandson. They said that he was the hero chosen specifically by Ilias to save the world, saving it from what is a question for another day, but he was chosen by Ilias, the goddess herself. That's some bragging rights there.
From what I heard; he has been busy. Just before he was crowned an apprentice hero he rescued Hans from the clutch of monster slime, proving his worth as a hero before he even crowned as one! He has taken down the Four Heavenly Bandits that has terrorized Iliasburg for quite some time, rescued the Harpy back in Happiness Village; dealt with the slug infestation in Midas (I told them that it was all for naught in the end, but fighting against the queen herself and won should earn him some credibility). The last thing they heard from them was them sailing away from port Ilias under the goddess's protection. Their eyes lit up with pride as they spoke of their local hero/family.
They told him that he was a son of a hero who has brought many honours to this land. His mother unfortunately died many years ago and Marcellus, his father has left him to save the world or something. He never was heard from again, leaving behind his children behind with his best friend Lazarus. He told me that Lazarus is a rough man, but a good person at heart. He refuses to teach Luka sword skill because his technique is so reckless that he wore out his arm to the point of uselessness. I asked them if he is ambidextrous or not. They said nobody knows.
I bid my farewell to the old couple and made my way to the temple. I knew changing job here might be a tad bit easier here, but this woman I found takes the cake. Before, she was a freaking nun with faith that is resolute like the mountain, now she was making jokes about her religion, prancing around in skin-tight bunny outfit. She said that she became a gadabout because she was BORED of being a nun! She literally discarded her entire faith just to be a jester?!
Man, she's lucky. If she pulled that shit in any Islamic-State controlled territory a few decades ago, I'm not sure if there's anything left of her.
The captain was glad to see me, saying that it's nice to see a warrior like myself return. He slapped my back jovially, telling me that he should not let me go out there alone; I just brought another Monster Girl as a wife already.
I asked him about Lost Wood, whether it has any place worthwhile to visit. He said that there is a beach that was only accessible through the forest alone. It was called the Lemuse Beach. The beach is a popular hanging out spot for sea-based Monster Girls while the forest filled to the brim with magically powerful fairies, elves and whatnot. What made the forest valuable? Simple, many powerful artefacts were created by the creature of the forest. Many elemental stones can be found here naturally or made by the fairies themselves. The power from the stones can be used to strengthen equipment or armour with elemental power. I picked up some of them during my journey. Glad to know these trinkets are useful.
I asked him for a job, but he said that I have done enough already. Too bad, so sad, just as I was about to test out my new strap…
I then walked down to the Temple's guard mess hall. It was supposed for the guards only, but they were famous for their leniency, so I took a sit beside a couple of dudes in light armour eating their meal. They were eating wheat bread and potato to go with their cup of wine. One of them raised their head and noticed me. He was one of the soldiers I escorted back in Cave of Trials two weeks ago. He told me that it was good to see me again, and that the job he is taking currently is boring. That moment in the Cave is the only time he ever actually faced 'real' combat.
Is the temple safe with these greenhorns around?
The soldier, whom he called himself as Flash (I go in and out quickly as a flash!) told me that if I am going for the forest, I should stop by a nearby albeit smaller woods, for in the middle there is a tent that I can visit if I desire company. I told him that it was not in my interest for a cheap shag. He told me that there's virtually no risk of death by Critical Ecstasy or even addiction. His friend added his two cents, saying that a Battle Fucker is virtually indestructible against every sex-based Monster girl out there. I thanked them for their two cent and walked away slowly.
I visited Aunt Betty again, just to say hello. She's the one who gave me shelter the first day here after all. Like always, I let her read my journal with a cup of tea we shared. We talked like old buddies as I remembered back my adventure. I also slip in some part of my past adventure before getting here, which is a unique blend of dark humour and light that was crapped on me by God for the past half-decade.
We both felt a certain familiarity as we both swapped out old time story. I giggled as I heard the story of Sonya, Luka's foster sister/childhood friend who was lost in the wood trying to find Luka, only to get lost in the process. She was subsequently discovered by two Slime Girls, who promptly followed Sonya's example as she cried her small child heart. Luka ends up doing the rescue in the end.
I told him of a story of a man who was cheating with his wife for 3 other hidden women, and for some reason he manages to hide them from each other… Until those women figured out the whole scheme thanks to some misplaced letter and picture he kept. It was funny, seeing that rich man running through his whole lodge house with his 4 wives chasing him mercilessly. The bodyguard would've helped him, but the girls paid me to bribe them to look the other way as they mercilessly pummelled the poor soul to pieces. The bodyguards of the house and me agreed that he deserved that. Betty and Latina were in stitches hearing how the lecherous man was thrown off a window just to land into his swimming pool.
Betty told me that she spoke with Luka before. She said that he and his friend did pass by Lost Wood. Thing is, she also said that she knew of a friend in a nearby forest that potentially knows where my friend is, considering that she was quite a social butterfly for a Battle Fucker.
The trek through the open plain was short and plain. The golden shine from my ride scares off any potential ambusher. Some stopped me, but their intention was kind. They thanked me for the rescue of their children in Pornof's Mountain, which they are their relatives that was missing for a few days. Some extra gold coins don't hurt to be honest. But I did it because it was the right thing to do, and it was in my power to do so.
If only I didn't come too late…
Anyway, the path through the wood was smooth and pleasant with the afternoon sun shining above us. I saw several naked Orc Girls prancing around, having a game of tag with each other. I averted my gaze out of reflex, which makes Latina oddly happy for some reason.
It was in the evening that I saw the tent appears at the side of the road like it's a fucking truck stop. Calling it a tent is a joke, because it resembles more of a portable tent house that was supported by 4 poles of iron at each corner of the square base of the tent. Latina told me that it would be nice to stop by for a few minutes of rest or so. I followed her advice, and entered the tent while Latina waits outside to guard the perimeter.
For a tent, it looks like it was furnished for a house instead. A twin-sized bed sits at the corner of the house, complete with pink bed sheet to match the pink aesthetic of the house. I'll refer it as a house for it was what it was, a house. To make it even better, there's even a painting of a hearth beside the bed as in emulating a proper hearth in a middle-age house. A pair of heavy-looking cupboard sits at the west of the bed. A chair and a table sit near the cupboard. To top it off, a single cuckoo-clock hangs at the 'wall' of the tent.
Marie was a maiden in pink, although her occupation doesn't mean she was one either. She has a soft, tomboyish visage that says innocent and cute lewdness at the same time. Her soft flowing pink hair cascaded over her pink dress. Her lapel was secured by a large pink gemstone. Her huggable body was covered by a simple pink and white dress. At the corner of her white apron is a pair of red heart stitched carefully. Her purple pink eyes stared at me with a certain cat-like desire as I approach the beautiful woman.
Out of all the women I've met in this horny hellhole, she's the one that I gladly would pay money to get sucked off until I'm drier than a stick in a Saharan Desert.
The second one would be that nurse from the university back in Ilias Port. She's second because my brother in arms always told me to never stick my dick in crazy, but she's second place because I personally would stick it in, just because I'm built different.
But I'm not easy, I'm Alex Armin, and I'm always hard. So, before I spent some precious moolah to get some fine thang, I asked her questions to know more about this ridiculous sport they call Battle Fucking.
Back in the days before Ilias faith were widespread men and women fight sexually (What?). It's literally a battle of sex endurance. The essence is that the man and woman who participate must make their opponent come first to win. The core rule is that they can only fight with pleasure, violent act is prohibited. It's simple, but deep competition in its heyday. It was prohibited when Ilias was in charge, but ever since the Renaissance it has a surge of popularity.
But the original rule was modified as there was a glaring weakness in the battle. Women found it very easy to make a man cum before they do, so the new rule changes it from a battle of sex endurance into a contest of a woman's skill against a man's endurance (What's the fucking difference?). If the woman can make a man come before she exhausted her 5-minute time limit, she wins. But if he resisted for 5 minutes straight, he'll win. That's how it works now. She said that it doesn't matter in the end, as many men cannot resist a very skilled woman for even 2 minutes. She said that it was now more of a competition between women on who can make a man cum faster than the others. For some inane reason, the male cannot relieve himself using her even if he won.
She asked me whether if I wanted to have a round with her. Now that's just taking the piss. This is even worse than going to a hostess club! Unlike that glorified bar, I actually get blue-balled for real! Who the fuck would pay money for that?!
And then, she activated her trap card.
She told me that she knew of a certain friend that has passed her tent earlier before, seemingly in a hurry. She told me that the person was aiming for a certain area in Lost Wood, a certain village or something called Enrika. She said that she has the copy of the map she used to navigate the forest, for there is where Marie used to forage for precious stone. All I need to do is to participate in a Battle Fuck. If I win, I get the map, if I lose, I must pay 60 gold coins. Jesus Christ, she's a fucking gold digger!
I seriously considered shooting her in the face and rummage the room over her dead body. Or hell, maybe pistol-whip her to oblivion, she doesn't look much. But what I learned in the past is that looks doesn't matter, and you can't see skill until it was shown. In the end, I relented. I don't want to waltz in alone without direction. That's the best way of getting lost.
Thankfully, men got it easy with this. I don't need to take off my pants to even pee. All I have to do is undo some straps, undo the belt, undo some straps, undo the codpiece, undo more straps, then pull the mushroom out. She stared at my groin with a growing sense of anticipation, as if awaiting a great treasure in a box. My hands worked slowly and carefully, trying to make sure that I didn't end up displacing a pouch or three, or devil's forbid, fuck up my exoskeleton setup. With a final flourish my flesh gun popped out from my holster, its muzzle raised toward her face in defiance.
The barely concealed disappointment from her face hurts more than every gunshot I sustained back home.
Anyway, my size does not stop her from doing her work, and damn she did her job very fucking well. She whipped out a simple pocket watch and set it to 5 minutes. Then she started the attack with a gentle caress of her soft finger. Electric shock of pleasure raced up from my penis to my backbone, putting me in a choke hold of desire.
I clenched my teeth and back, forcing my body from succumbing to pleasure through sheer indomitable will. Her finger was softer in person, bringing promise of pleasure unknown for my virgin(?) body.
Every caress, every movement brings more pleasure upon me. My mind cannot comprehend the time that passes, only the growing pressure upon my meat gun. Minutes have passed, and my strength saps in every second it goes on. But I am winning.
Marie has a determined look on her face, the look that every fighter has when they are facing a challenge. As if knowing she was fighting a losing battle, her vigour in battle multiplies. She was right, there's no way in hell a man can prevent himself from cumming when a woman has fingers like those.
30 seconds…
I gritted my teeth harder. The pressure is overwhelming.
20 seconds…
My gun is locked and loaded; all it need was a squeeze.
15 seconds…
She squeezed the trigger.
I lost.
Looking at my dirty lower body, I felt drained of my strength. The same indomitable will that has saved me through the harshest of situation, has been drained of by just a simple woman. Pain…It hurt, but felt good at the same time. She smiled at me, saying that I got very close to winning the battle. It doesn't matter to me, I lost. I lost what I makes me, me. My will, my semen, my juice stained her finger, a sign of my failure as a man and myself. I failed myself. I'm sorry Meiling…
The boner I got was still strong, and I needed the map, so I asked for a rematch. This time, I decided to pull out a secret weapon. Money changes hand, and she went back to work. I pull out my wallet and looked at the picture of my buddy Samuel Hito. I am a piece of shit, but there's no way in hell I'll cum while looking at the face of Sairento's father!
It was a close match, but grasped victory, and got my money back and the map from her. I got my fill from her, and I can have Latina finish me off with her titties. I dare say this venture of mine is indeed, worth it.
Not only that, as a freebie she gave me a piece of paper, saying that this might belong to someone who knows me, a friend if she was right as there was my name written on it. The paper was Hito's next diary page. That blew my mind. How the hell he got here? Is he not across the sea, in a whole different country? I mean, the only way I got to that puritan village is through some portal ripped open by some White Rabbit.
Anyway, she said that I'm welcome to come back and try again if I got stronger later on. I asked her how I can become more resistance to pleasure. She said that the only way to be resistant to them is by training thyself to resist them, which includes me having multiple sexual intercourses to build my resistance from pleasure. Fuck my life…
After that debacle with Marie, I asked Latina to finish me off with her massive badonkers. As much as I don't want to be known as a horse-fucker, even an average ass-man would become a titty enjoyer if they got Latina doing the deed with her fun bags.
Anyway, it was close to sunset anyway, so Latina thought that it was good as all time to call it quit and call it a day. Marie told us that we must sleep outside or else her business will be interrupted by our presence. I just shrugged my shoulder and unpacked my sleeping bag. My guide simply kneels down and her human form hugged her horse lower part before falling asleep.
I am now writing this journal in my sleeping bag; outside a tent where I got my first taste of Battle Fucking culture (still thinks the entire concept is retarded), exchanged words with some spooky scary skeleton, on my way to Lost Woods and has upgraded my rifle with some cursed artefact, which is now in my arm as I lay in the warm confine of my sleeping bag.
Writing this journal took a long time. By the time I got to this point, the sun has fallen, letting night reign supreme for the next 12 hours. The stars were bright above me; its pattern of white twinkling diamond decorates the black satin dress the moon wear to court the planet Earth. Judging from the twinkles from the green forest jacket Mother earth wore she likes the moon courtship, whom was slowly twirling across the sky in the ballroom of universe which Sun and Moon took turn waltzing with Mother Earth throughout eternity.
Sun and Moon is a pair, always separate but never far away. The stars only appear at night, but they were never alone.
And here I am, surrounded by life, yet alone in reality…