INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT
Beavis and Butt-head are standing in the back of the comedy club, watching Andrew Dice Clay perform.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(to the audience)
Hey, how you doin'? Heh heh heh.
The crowd goes wild.
BUTT-HEAD
Hey Beavis, who's that guy on stage?
BEAVIS
I don't know, but he's like, really funny.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(to the audience)
So I'm walking down the street, right? And this guy comes up to me and says, "Hey, are you Andrew Dice Clay?" And I say, "No, I'm his cousin, Andrew Dice Lay." Heh heh heh.
The crowd erupts in laughter.
Beavis and Butt-head are intrigued.
BEAVIS
Heh heh heh, we should like, meet that guy.
BUTT-HEAD
Yeah, and maybe he'll teach us how to be funny.
They make their way to the backstage area and knock on Andrew Dice Clay's dressing room door.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(from inside)
Who is it?
BUTT-HEAD
It's Beavis and Butt-head.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(skeptically)
Beavis and Butt-head? What do you want?
They enter the dressing room and nervously introduce themselves.
BEAVIS
Heh heh heh, we wanna be funny like you.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(smirking)
Yeah? You think you got what it takes?
BUTT-HEAD
Yeah, we got jokes and stuff.
Andrew Dice Clay leans in close.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(whispering)
Alright, I'll let you in on a little secret. You wanna be funny? You gotta be edgy. You gotta push the envelope.
BEAVIS
(pushes imaginary envelope)
Heh heh heh, like this?
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(nodding)
Yeah, yeah, that's it. And you gotta use lots of curse words.
BUTT-HEAD
(skeptical)
Uh, I don't know. My mom doesn't like it when I curse.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(smiling)
Hey, you wanna be a comedy legend or what?
Beavis and Butt-head nod eagerly.
ANDREW DICE CLAY (CONT'D)
Alright then, let's hear some of those jokes.
Beavis and Butt-head exchange a nervous glance, then launch into their routine, trying their best to be edgy and offensive.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(shaking his head)
No, no, no. You guys got it all wrong.
He takes out a pen and paper and starts scribbling.
ANDREW DICE CLAY (CONT'D)
Here, try this one. "Hey, what's the difference between a pizza and a Jew?"
Beavis and Butt-head look at each other, uncertain.
ANDREW DICE CLAY (CONT'D)
" A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven!"
Beavis and Butt-head look horrified.
BEAVIS
Uh, that's not really funny.
ANDREW DICE CLAY
(rolling his eyes)
Kids these days. You'll never make it in this business.
He shoos them out of the dressing room, leaving Beavis and Butt-head feeling disillusioned and disappointed.