A/N: Lyrics again from Depeche Mode - Precious

Angels with silver wings
Shouldn't know suffering
I wish I could take the pain for you
If God has a master plan
That only he understands
I hope it's your eyes he's seeing through

She bowed her head slightly, like she had no idea what to do next and neither did he, really; they needed to get going, needed to find Christina and also Lilly's service weapon before it got used for something that would land her into a world of trouble, but somehow he couldn't bring himself to turn and make his way back to the car. It seemed like his energy reserve had been depleted completely again, with no help available from his partner; with Lilly's trip to New York with the Feds and then all this recent shit, he hadn't seen her smile for forever.

"Are you gonna take it? The job?" he found himself asking quietly, totally out of the blue, really not wanting an answer but somehow also needing one; if she said yes, it would mean a complete rearrangement of his life, at work and otherwise, and he might just as well get started with that process right away. Not that it would probably be very successful; yeah, he'd get a new partner most likely, would try his best to create a good relationship with whoever that ended up being, but it would never be like this.

She watched him intensely, taking a small step closer, even more anger receding from her face; she was quiet for a long moment, then offered just the tiniest shrug.

"I don't know."

"Right." He looked away, raked a hand through his hair; that answer didn't help in the slightest, but it was probably all he would get out of her today, and her expression told him she was being fully honest. "Well, we should probably…"

And then all the hurt and frustration slammed back into her again; he could literally see it, see her flip from Lilly to Detective Rush in half a heartbeat, her eyes again darkening with anger. It really was absolutely astounding how she was able to do that, astounding and quite frankly a little scary; she pulled in a few deep, shaky breaths, took some more steps until she was right in front of him.

"Why wouldn't you just tell me?"

God, he was so fucking tired. So tired of this, tired of everything, all the twists that life had offered over the… past months, maybe even years. Jesus Christ, would the universe ever grant him a break? Just a little breathing break, that was all he wanted.

"I don't know, Lil." He ground his teeth together, his temper and anger fully reactivated again; stepping even closer to her, he could feel his eyes narrowing, furiously searching her blue gaze for something he couldn't even name.

"Maybe I've got my own family to deal with," he pretty much growled into her face, suddenly so furious, maybe at her, maybe at the world, maybe at his mother's attacker, maybe at himself. "Did you ever think of that?"

Her eyes clouded over, the blue rapidly becoming hazy, then damp; guilt won over every other emotion that was in the race and she looked down, swallowing. For a nanosecond Scotty felt vindicated, satisfied, some petulant little child raising its head in him and taunting her; serves you right, Rush, it's not all about you now, is it? He stared at her angrily, felt his cheek twitching again, his anger roaring when she refused to meet his eyes, his temper no longer in his control.

He didn't even notice moving, not fully, but suddenly he somehow had her pinned against the wall, his body flush with hers, his face a hair's breadth from hers; now her eyes were definitely glued to his, portraying shock and surprise and fury and some kind of a warning that told him clearly he'd very soon be in almighty trouble.

"Move," she hissed, trying to push him but Scotty didn't budge, not even really sure what the heck he was doing, but somehow overtaken by some strange urge to punish her. Punish her for putting her family issues over his even though she wasn't really, for blaming the whole Christina mess on him even though she had a full right to, but most of all for getting entangled with the Feds, for threatening to leave their tight-knit family at the cold case squad and… and for having a goddamn fling with that agent, Cavanaugh, that cocky, full-of-himself bastard who had breezed into town like he owned it, then breezed back out and took Lilly with him. Rumors had reached back to Philly, about the Woodstock casework and what had maybe happened; she hadn't bothered to deny anything when Kat Miller had grilled her about the gossip, just shrugging slightly, her cheeks pinking and that, more than anything, had given away the truth. Scotty wasn't fully sure how long he had spent with a punching bag that evening, then the skipping rope, but neither had really helped with anything; he supposed he should have been relieved Lilly had even come back at all but he wasn't, the massive waves of jealousy threatening to drown him. And again, it hadn't been the first time, far from it.

Her eyes blazed furious blue electricity at him, and the air seemed to hum and crackle around them, charged like a hot and heavy summer afternoon just before a massive thunderstorm struck. "Let me go, damn it! What are you..."

Briefly he wondered if she would reach for his gun since she didn't currently have hers and shoot him right there, or alternatively kick him where it really hurt; to prevent any such plans, he pressed even tighter against her and she quieted mid-sentence, swallowing. And suddenly there was a new glint in her ocean eyes, something far more dangerous than anything she had thrown his way before, her gaze flicking briefly to his lips and back again, and he knew the very same thing was clearly readable on his face too. He could feel it all over his body, fully awakened and demanding to be released, definitely not agreeing to be battled back into submission.

Desire.

And that was all it took for him to toss every caution and warning bell to the wind, bridge the tiny distance between them, and without any further ado seek her mouth with his.

His universe rocked, tilted on its axis from the first sensation of her soft lips against his; the world didn't end, however, and Scotty idly contemplated the fact that he had probably been expecting it to do just that, for the sky to come crashing down just because he had dared to finally take the step that would forever alter their relationship. Lilly was frozen to complete stillness for a moment, tense and rigid against him and he slowed the kiss down to just a gentle brushing of their lips, would have wanted to immediately devour her with everything he had; his inner guidebook, however, very quickly advised him she was probably scared, terrified even, not of him as such but of what all this might lead to. He laid one hand on her neck, underneath the ponytail; her hair felt amazing against his skin, like the softest silk waterfall, and he rubbed her skin soothingly, in small circles, still keeping their lips tenderly connected.

She was melting into him now, relaxing little by little, still hadn't shoved him away even though he fully expected her to do so, any second now. Her hand was still between them against his chest where she'd tried to push him earlier, and suddenly she was grasping a hold of his shirt; then her lips were parting and she was deepening the kiss, and Jesus Christ, Scotty was definitely ready to pass out now. She tasted absolutely incredible, smelled divine, hints of vanilla and something quite exotic, something that reminded him of lands far away, made his head spin; it wasn't really a perfume scent, he suddenly realized, it was just her, and he would never get enough of it. Now satisfied that she was okay, he tilted his head, kissing her hungrily, desperate for more, more, more; then a low moan left her throat, reached his ears, making a strong shiver of lust move through him. This had to be a damn dream, he thought hazily, had to be because in the real world it couldn't in any way be possible that he had made Lilly Rush moan, release hands down the sexiest sound he had ever heard; it resonated through him, attaching itself to the most intimate locations.

God, she was absolute heaven.

A loud whistle pierced the mist that had firmly taken over his mind, making him slowly return to reality and remember they weren't alone, they were outside in the middle of the city, on Lilly's street, and he held her against the brick wall of some office building, in plain view of everyone who happened to be walking past. Somehow Scotty managed to lift his head, groaning softly as their lips separated; glancing to the side, his eyes fell on two snickering teenagers, both chewing gum loudly and grinning widely at them.

"Sheesh, man, get a room."

He made a face, annoyed, still stayed against Lilly for some sort of support, protection, bringing one hand to his waist and brushing the lapel of his suit jacket to the side enough to reveal the police badge clipped onto his belt. "Get lost."

The teenagers scampered, still tossing looks at them over their shoulders and laughing, making some offhanded comments about interrogation techniques; he growled slightly, finally stepped back a little, keeping his eyes firmly down for a moment before daring to glance at her. He was utterly terrified of what he might read in her eyes now, terrified her expression would be back to full rage, hatred even, just waiting for her palm to viciously connect with his cheek… She was quiet, her eyes searching and exploring his, her lips swollen and her chest rising and falling rapidly as she tried to catch her breath; then the most gorgeous blush appeared on her face, coloring her cheekbones and spreading elsewhere, and it really took every goddamn inch of self control he had to not go back for a second round of incredible kissing.

This woman would be the death of him, he had zero doubt of that by now.

"I… uh…" Scotty took a few more rapid steps backwards, quite unable to believe he had done what he just had; there was no way she would ever want to become anything more with him, he knew this for a fact, they were partners and nothing more, if even that anymore, and he could feel himself starting to panic. Jesus, he had really gotten himself into the shit now, as if the goddamn ice block he'd been in previously hadn't been bad enough. "Let's… we should…"

Lilly gazed at him, her cheeks still flushed. "Scotty…"

"Don't, Lil." He lifted a hand at her, needing her to be quiet so she wouldn't say the words he was absolutely dreading, the words that would strike into his heart like a knife, leaving it bleeding and permanently shattered. We can't do this, what the hell were you thinking, do not ever touch me again…

"Just don't. Just leave it, okay?"

"What the hell's wrong with you?" she hissed, the blush on her cheeks deepening, her eyes darkening; clearly he was managing to piss her off again. "Why are you being a goddamn ass, Valens? You kissed me, remember, after manhandling me into a bloody brick wall first, and now it's all my fault?"

Christ, why did she have to be so fucking beautiful, now even more so than ever before? Every single cell and physical instinct in him was screaming at him to kiss her again, to drag her into her house that was dangerously close, take her to the bedroom and make love to her until neither of them remembered their own name, yet alone what all the arguing had been about. Grinding his teeth again, Scotty assessed his options, possible paths; it was quite useless, however, as every single one seemed to lead to the exact same outcome: an angry blonde who hated his guts. He released a harsh breath, took a few more steps away from her, tried desperately to calm down; he turned back to look at her just as she turned away, her eyes directed to the ground.

"Are we just gonna stand here arguin', all damn day?" he managed to finally get out after another long look, tearing his eyes from her, spinning on his heel and leaning to tug open the car's passenger side door. "Or are we gonna get your gun an' Christina back?"

Lilly raised her head, her eyes wide and full of pain and repressed tears, and he cursed himself, knowing he was at least 90 per cent responsible for that expression with his recent actions, not just today but over the past couple of days too. She swallowed, then visibly gathered herself, making her way over and getting into the car; her incredible scent remained behind her, in the air, finding its way straight to him and Scotty closed his eyes, suddenly realizing something that had him release a frustrated groan, his hand squeezing into a fist.

In their quest of getting her gun and Christina back, he would be stuck in the car with his partner, for God knew how long, stuck with the woman he had just kissed and was having very, very non-professional thoughts about, had been for far longer than he cared to admit, but this afternoon had definitely turned everything to its head and now nothing was the same anymore, never would be.

He was so damn screwed.

I pray you learn to trust
Have faith in both of us
And keep room in your hearts for two