A/N: Please do review if you feel at all inclined to do so - I assume there are people reading based on the stats, which is great, but reviews are like a writer's morning coffee - almost, anyway:)
Lilly really didn't know what she had been expecting, but the universe offering her something positive for a change and gifting her with a baby niece definitely hadn't been it.
She was standing outside the Jersey City Heights apartment they had broken into a while ago, cradling the tiny blonde-haired girl on her arms, almost swaying from exhaustion, staring at the perfect little creature like it was a mirage. The new day was already dawning; she had no idea what time it was, how long they had been on the road, she only remembered almost killing Christina's asshole of a boyfriend, remembered being held back by Scotty's voice, full of emotion, begging her to reconsider, to not do it. He had gotten through to her, of course he had, and so she had just holstered her service weapon and retrieved the baby, swaddled her into a blanket and carried her outside, on the way making sure to toss an almighty hateful glare towards the unconscious creep on the floor.
"Another Rush girl, huh?" Scotty made his way to them, having settled Christina onto the back seat of their car; he chuckled slightly, shaking his head. "I predict trouble."
Lilly offered a tired nod, looking back down to the baby; the little girl was awake, huge blue eyes staring right back, the eyes her aunt and late grandmother shared with her. She pressed a tender kiss onto the baby's forehead, felt a couple of tears run down her cheeks.
"Hey, you."
"Come on." Scotty grasped her elbow gently, glanced back towards the front door. "We need to go before that jerk regains consciousness. There's no baby seat so you're gonna have to just hold her; we'll stop somewhere, get some stuff for her."
"Thank you." A massive wave of gratitude washed over her again as she studied her partner; he looked just as exhausted as she probably did, eyes even darker than normal, his hair somewhat messy. And she suddenly found everything so goddamn sexy, especially the stubble that adorned his cheeks and jaw; she really kind of wanted to touch it, to feel it against her own face, too tired now to pretend, too shaken by the recent events to keep all of her feelings hidden in their carefully ordained boxes.
"Are you sure you're okay driving?"
"I'll be fine; I just wanna get as much distance between us an' that guy as possible." He guided her into the car next to Christina, made sure she and the baby were settled and then they were back on the road again, the sun rising to shine on another glorious early May day. The dark blue ocean stretched out on one side of the highway, and Lilly watched it for a long while, in her thoughts taken back to that day on the beach once more, building sand castles and just being a carefree little girl, if only for a short moment in time. All too soon, however, she had been back to dealing with her drinking mother, her father's departure, and again and again trying to tell her sister everything would be all right.
She turned her attention back to the baby, quietly swore to her there and then that she would never allow the same kind of a fate to fall on her, then glanced at Christina, sleeping against her shoulder. She would take her sister to rehab herself, with force if she had to, would make sure Christina got clean, for the sake of this little girl; Lilly already felt a strong bond with her niece, the baby that was nearly identical to what her mother had looked like as a child. This tiny creature was innocent, had done nothing wrong; she deserved the world, and Lilly was going to do everything in her power to give that to her.
Scotty looked into the rear-view mirror, his eyes meeting hers; then he glanced briefly over his shoulder, gave a smile that made warmth explode low in her belly. "You really should try to get some sleep, Lil."
"Nah; I need to keep an eye on you, make sure you don't faint and crash." She chuckled at his scowl. "It's been a long day and night; I think even you need rest on occasion, Valens."
"Yeah, yeah." He grinned, glancing at the sign on the side of the road; they were about 60 miles from Philadelphia. "When that little one gets hungry, there'll definitely be no sleep for any of us, that's for sure. We really need to get some formula for her; I assume Christina isn't… breastfeedin', with all the drugs."
"She goddamn better not be," Lilly muttered, checking the screen of her phone; Boss had called at some stage, and she wondered if anyone had told him anything, wondered how much trouble she and Scotty were in after disappearing for an entire day. If they were, it would all be on her and she would take the blame fully; her partner wouldn't be reprimanded just because she had dragged him into this unholy mess with her, without even asking if he wanted to be a part of it. At least it was Saturday today, so they had only been gone for one workday.
"I'm not breastfeeding," her sister mumbled, shifting against her a little, still almost completely out of it; still, she had obviously been awake enough to hear Scotty's words. "I'm not a total idiot."
"Really? You could have fooled me." Lilly pressed her hand into a fist, used the sting of her nails against her palm as a way to try and keep herself calm. "A baby with a guy who used you to buy and distribute drugs, Christina? Seriously? This is a new low, even for you."
Scotty cleared his throat quietly, shifted lanes and pulled off the highway; she spotted a 24-hour Target coming up on their right side. She pinched the bridge of her nose, her skin feeling hot, her eyes and mouth like sandpaper; she couldn't even remember the last time she'd had anything to eat or drink.
Christina rolled her eyes. "Why are you even assuming Cliff's her father? He isn't."
"Thank God," Scotty muttered quietly; Lilly narrowed her eyes at him, tossing her free hand into the air.
"I assumed that because you were living with him; it's hardly a leap." She shook her head, glancing down to the baby; in all honesty, the little girl looked nothing like the man she had threatened to shoot a while ago, but she had just figured her niece got all of her features and coloring from her mother. "So who's the father then? Or do you even know?"
"Just this guy I was briefly seeing," her sister mumbled, turning to lean her head against the car window. "He took off the second the pregnancy test turned positive."
"Well, that's just great. You really do know how to pick them, huh?" She ignored her partner's annoyed glance, the scoff that left his mouth. "Does she even have a name?"
Scotty stopped the car into a parking spot and turned it off, leaving them in a heavy silence; in a momentary burst of anger, Lilly struck her elbow into her sister's side, not really caring if she hit somewhere that had been abused earlier. She silenced Scotty's impending protest with an icy glare, ignoring Christina's whimper of pain.
"Does she have a name, damn it?!"
"Elizabeth," Christina managed to choke out, her head lolling back towards her older sister's shoulder, looking like it was too heavy for her neck to carry.
"Elizabeth Ellen Rush. Lizzie."
Scotty looked at them over his shoulder, smiling; then his expression quickly turned into alarm as Lilly felt all of her exhaustion and stress suddenly slamming into her like a Mack truck, her face twisting, the fiery burn in her eyes erupting down to her cheeks in a hot and heavy flood of tears. She had never cried in front of him, not once, always carefully keeping herself controlled; now hearing her niece's beautiful name had been the proverbial last straw, breaking the camel's back.
Her heavy sobs awakened Lizzie, the baby joining the choir and starting to scream; Lilly tried to weakly placate her, to no avail, Christina attempting to reach over her and touch the baby but not really managing either action. And then Scotty was there, opening the back door and tenderly soothing the little girl, muttering something to her in Spanish and silence fell once again as the baby stared at him, clearly fascinated and totally in awe.
"There you go, little Lizzie; it's all good." He smiled at her, gently rubbing her brow. "I bet you're gettin' hungry, aren't you? That makes two of us, plus I'm pretty sure your mom an' auntie could use somethin' to eat as well."
The little girl babbled happily, offering him a sunny smile and Lilly forgot all about her breakdown, just watching the beautiful sight. "Bloody hell. What are you; a baby whisperer?"
Scotty laughed, backing out of the car and straightening with Lizzie on his arms; she followed them, glancing at her sister, Christina nearly falling asleep again but with a small smile on her face too. It felt good to be on her feet, to stretch a little, but she could feel her weakness and tiredness; it would definitely take a while before she was back in full strength, both mentally and physically.
"Are you okay, Lil?" He lifted one hand from the baby, gently brushed her forearm. "I've never seen you… this upset before."
"I…" She was just about to give him her customary answer that everything was fine, that she was just fine, but something in his eyes told her that one would no longer fly.
"I don't know. It's… it's a lot."
"Yeah." He gave her arm a gentle squeeze, smiled at the baby. "All right; I'll go grab some milk and diapers for her, maybe some clothes too, just in case. An' then after that I'll get breakfast for us."
Lizzie absolutely refused to be parted from him, starting to scream the moment he attempted to transfer her onto her aunt's arms, so Scotty ended up taking her with him to the store; Lilly watched after them, shaking her head briefly before getting back into the car next to her sister.
"She loves him, huh?" Christina mumbled, rubbing her temples in slow circles; Lilly felt her old worries resurfacing, suddenly overcome with a sheer terror that her sister would use the baby to get back into Scotty's good books, to grasp him into her claws once again.
"Looks like it." She crossed her arms, kept her eyes resolutely towards the store; Christina laughed quietly, seeming a bit more lucid and awake now.
"And she's not the only one, is she?"
"What?" She turned to look at her sister, getting a teasingly arched eyebrow in response. "What are you talking about?"
"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about." Christina sighed, shook her head a little and closed her eyes. "Tell me something: what exactly are you waiting for, Lil? The damn apocalypse?"
She watched as her sister fell asleep, breathing evening out; suddenly the car felt way too small, choking her so she got out again, paced a couple of rounds around the vehicle, trying to grasp onto something, to make some sense of the thoughts swirling wildly in her head. Scotty and Lizzie emerged from the store a moment later with a stuffed plastic bag, and she watched their approach silently, the familiar warmth back in her belly, tenderness and longing flooding her at the sight. She didn't know if it was due to her partner, or more specifically to her partner with a baby, but this feeling really was entirely new in its intensity, rendering her unable to do anything but stare.
"All done." He gave her a smile, Lizzie following the example. "She's changed, an' the saleslady made her a bottle; seems like it's a quiet mornin' at the store so they were all dotin' on her."
He handed over the warm milk bottle and Lilly managed to take a seat again, sniffling slightly as Scotty placed the baby onto her lap; Lizzie cried a little, clearly hungry, then settled with the bottle, looking up at her with huge blue eyes.
Lilly turned her gaze to her partner, found him already watching her with an expression she couldn't quite read; then he gave a smile and a little teasing wink.
"Baby looks good on you, Rush." He glanced at his watch. "I'll go grab some breakfast an' coffees."
She nodded, swallowing, staring after him for as long as she could see him; Christina's words were playing in her head on a loop, mixing with the expression that had been on Scotty's face when he had talked her out of taking Cliff's useless life. The terrified, unbelievably emotional look had spoken only of one thing, the need to keep her from harm, from the trouble that would without a doubt follow if she killed the man, even when she was a police officer and he had been threatening their lives, had abused Christina. And then his words, his tone so loaded with meaning and feelings that had been clearly so close to the surface in him, making her instantly respond, to step away, to do as he had said.
Let's go home.