Chapter 5

Katherine really hoped Allie hadn't heard the curse she had just grunted. She really should have been more attentive to all that ice. A splint of pain shot through her ankle when she tried to move it, and she cursed again at it. At least it had happened on the way back from the chicken coop, the grain bag already empty, or else there would be the waste to add to her sorrows.

"Are you hurt?" Lord Tamlin was kneeling on the ground by her side before she could even notice him. Where had he come from?

"I think I've hurt my ankle." She sulked, steeling herself to ask him to help her up.

Without as much as a warning he scooped her up, as if she weighed hardly anything at all, and carried her in to the kitchen counter.

"Thank you."

It was unsettling to be handled like that, especially by him, but he had done it in good intention and it was effective, so Katherine didn't really have grounds for complaining.

"Tell me if it hurts."

Katherine tried not to flinch as the High Lord moved her foot carefully one way and then another, his fingers very cold even through the leather of her boot, and apologized when she complained of the pain, without the curses this time. It was a nuisance, but she could feel it wasn't a major injury, it would be healed in a heartbeat if she hadn't been so long far from the sun.

"It's not serious, but try not to walk too much for a while."

Sound advice for a farmer. What did he expect? That she would summon her many servants to do the farm-work for her while she recovered, leaning on her many pillows and sipping some tea?

"Can I make you something for the pain?"

She wouldn't have expected him to know how to treat a wound.

"Thank you."

Katherine felt slightly guilty for her unfriendly thoughts. At least he was trying.

"It's nothing."

The High Lord looked through the medicine box.

"Have you done this before?"

He shrugged.

"In the war band. Someone gets hurt everyday, you get used to it."

Of course. How stupid of her.

Allie set a pot with some water on the stove.

"I'll care for dinner tonight."

"Thank you, darling."

"I can do it." Lord Tamlin volunteered "If you don't mind a camp dinner."

"That would be nice." Allie chirped.

"Watch it or she'll have you doing her embroidery in no time." Katherine mumbled.

Lord Tamlin's eyes lightened up from the usual melancholy and he smiled.

"That would be dreadful to see."

He waited until Katherine had taken her tea and helped her down from the counter, before taking his leave.

"I'll fetch us some game."

Katherine nodded curtly. All this time she had been rationing her portions to feed one more mouth and only now it had occurred to him that he could hunt.

Better late than never?

She could have asked him to hunt, of course, but she didn't want to draw his attention to the fact that she was counting every spoonful she ate. Allie and her had only just managed to get him eating healthily, if he thought it was taxing them he may go back to starving himself, and Katherine couldn't allow that. The quicker he recovered the quicker he would be gone.

She limped to her bedroom to change out of the mud-stained clothes. Her collarbones had already been noticeable at the end of her term, now they were certainly shocking to anyone who had known her before. She donned a high-necked dress to cover the indiscrete signs of poverty, but it was perceptively loose on her waist. It wouldn't be long now, the tomatoes were growing like nothing she had ever seen, and as soon as the High Lord was gone she would eat like a wolf and go back to her usual plumpness. She had survived worse times.

Tamlin lowered his ears against his skull. The deer must have been a prince among it´s kind in the days of his prime, even old and limping from a wound, probably gotten the last time something tried to eat it, it was still imposing, with a big antlered head and smart eyes. It hadn't spotted him yet.

Perhaps fate had brought him to the cottage not only for his own benefit but for theirs as well. If the Elliots had been alone when Katherine fell, what would they do? She would never let Allie do her part of the work and that sprain was not going to heal properly if she didn't take a rest. Perhaps that was all the good he could do, to help a child while her mother recovered, and to be a friend to her.

His paws didn't make a sound on the frozen forest ground. The deer was within striking distance now. Tamlin went straight for the neck, but the deer turned to him in the last moment and their antlers clashed. It was not planning on going down without a fight. He dove under it and transformed back into High-Fae, barely having the time to bury a knife in the deer´s neck, soaking himself in the blood. The male moaned and bucked to the ground.

"I'm sorry my friend." Tamlin put his hand to the white-flecked snout, staining it with blood "It's over now. Thank you for keeping me alive."

The majestic creature sighed one last time before going still. His brothers and father had always thought it ridiculous of him to talk to the game he killed, something he had learned from an old chivalry romance when he was a child, but still, it seemed only right, and he always did it, even when he had to whisper it in secret.

He transformed into the beast once again, tossing the carcass of the deer across his back, blood running down his coat. It would last them a long time.

It was as if the Mother wanted him to learn something, to serve and to atone. He had been doing the slaughtering for their dinner, chopping wood to cook and to keep them warm, doing the milking in the early morning. It was an easier life, honest work, no tricky politics, no evasive diplomacy that promised everything and meant nothing. Just care for the plants, chop wood, prepare a chicken for dinner. Simple as that.

Perhaps he could live like that. Perhaps after Allie no longer needed him, he would find himself a nice clearing in the woods and live the rest of his life in peace, until he could redeem himself by fighting one last time. He smiled at the thought. That would be nice.

He stopped at the treeline, looking out towards the cottage. Katherine didn't seem to be afraid of him any more, but he didn't want to try his luck by appearing at her door in the skin of a bloodied beast. He went back to his High-Fae form and arranged the weight better on his shoulders. The deer had stopped bleeding now, but the blood from when he first struck covered the right side of his body from shoulder down to his boots.

Well, it was either that or the beast.

Tamlin laid the carcass down on the patio behind the cottage before walking in. He would have to make a fire to smoke the venison before it could spoil, but that would be no trouble.

Katherine jumped up to her feet as soon as he walked in the kitchen, her eyes wide as saucers.

"Are you hurt?"

The blood, of course.

"It's not mine. I'm fine."

She let out a sigh and put her hands on the back of a chair.

"Cauldron, you gave me a fright."

"I'm sorry about that." He had never thought that she would have cared much if he got injured, but she was Allie´s mother, she couldn't be all bad "I'm going to need the smoker for the meat."

"Sure." Katherine stood upright again, walking out of the kitchen door.

"You really shouldn't walk much. Just tell me where it is."

Katherine waved her hand dismissively.

"This is nothing."

She wasn't feeling any pain now due to the tea, but if she kept putting her weight on that ankle it would be worse by the morrow.

"Really-"

"I'm tougher than you think." Katherine shot him a glance that allowed for no reply.

Stubborn female. Did she think herself made of iron?

She checked at the deer carcass.

"Mother dearest, it's huge." It was the first time she really smiled at him. It made her look much more like Allie, but Allie didn't have dimples on her cheeks "Oh, Tamlin, how wonderful!"

He bit his tongue. He had, indeed, heard some females express those sentiments before, but that was the first time they were directed at venison. He could hear Lucien´s laughter in his mind.

That's why it was better for him to keep his damned mouth shut.

"You like venison then?" Was the best he managed to come up with. Katherine had opened a shack and was fumbling with the smoker. "Let me do this."

"Thank you." She stepped back, flustered "I've never tasted venison. What I see is a ton of good meat."

Tamlin guessed Katherine wasn't even fifty yet, and the joy at the perspective of stuffing her face with venison made her really look her age. The smile light up the amber in her eyes, and the dimples made her look girlish. She reached into her pocket and extended a ribbon to him.

"Tie your hair, for the Mother's sake, you're going to get it all in a tangle."

Did she have a spare ribbon that whole time and never once thought that the faerie with waist-length hair might need it?

"Thank you."

"Do you need help with it?"

Not from her, who should be inside resting with some ice on that ankle.

"Not really, I got this."

Katherine nodded.

"I'll be inside then."

Thank the Mother.

Katherine had to concede that it wasn't all bad having him there. The tea he had given her had dulled the pain in her ankle and if the clouds would finally part the following day she would be good as new.

"Mum, Tamlin is asking what do you want done with the hide." Allie hovered on the doorway to the kitchen.

"Tell him to leave it on the porch, I'll have it made into leather."

"Do you know how to?"

Katherine nodded.

"I've helped your father with it so many times I think I could do it with my hands tied to my back."

Allie chuckled at that.

"If you say so."

"I do."

She had helped Kiril do it to cow leather, but what else could she do? She couldn't just go to Lucas Garmin with a deer hide and expect him to believe it just wound up at her door, she had to make the best out of it, and so she would tan the leather herself. A pair of gloves or a pouch, maybe a belt.

The High Lord joined them at the table, washed, wearing his old tunic and having vanished the blood from his trousers and boots as best he could, but there was still a faint smell of it in the air.

"I take it that you like venison then?" He risked a half-smile in her direction.

Let him triumph. Katherine was eating a king´s dinner that she didn't have to pay for, so he may pride himself all he wanted, she still got the better end of the deal.

"Very much. Thank you for the meal."

He seemed the least bit embarrassed by his own triumphing.

"I'm glad."

The finest cut of the venison was served roasted with butter and herbs, and she enjoyed every last drop of fat she could catch with her slice of bread. Even the High Lord helped himself to seconds that night. A respite of abundance in her life, and a welcome one at that.

She sat herself down at the couch with a romance about a bored aristocrat falling in love and having an affair with a dashing youth in Winter, feeling the sleepy joy of a full belly. Outside, it had begun to snow again. Soon the snow would cut them off from the world, and there would be only the three of them.

Katherine had stopped fearing the High Lord so much, now that she had seen him frustrated enough times to be convinced that his temper, although dangerous, wasn't as volatile as she had assumed. She only wished that he had picked another day to start sitting on the armchair, preferably one when his trousers didn't hold traces of deer blood. But her armchair was too small for him, why wouldn't he sit on the couch? Sometimes it almost seemed that he was a bit afraid of her.

He had cost her so much. Did he even have the slightest idea? Seven years without Kiril, seven years struggling to breathe, trying to keep the worst of it from Allie, trying to guide the whole town onwards while herself could barely keep from drowning.

Why did he have to betray Hybern? They were already in Spring, for the Mother's sake.

The King of Hybern had hurt the Cursebreaker. Wouldn't she have done the same?

The thought of it made her head hurt. Maybe she would, but it didn't mean it was right, he was the High Lord, he should have known better, he should have thought of them, his people, and put them before even his fiancée.

It sounded absurd even as she thought it. Could she really hold against him that he had done something that she herself would probably have done too?

She rolled her wedding ring on her finger. It was so loose now that she feared it might fall off, as there was no longer a chain in which she could wear it. Still, she couldn't bring herself to leave it behind.

What if she let go of that… it wasn't hate, she didn't hate the High Lord anymore. What was it? She just wanted him to know that he had done wrong, and what it had cost her. She wanted to know that he was sorry for it, she just wanted to hear those words from him. Was there even a name for that feeling?

But what if she let go of that?

She couldn't. It felt like betraying Kiril´s memory. She should hate the faerie that had cost her the love of her life, the father of her child, or else, what did that say about her? Since she couldn't bring herself to hate him, she could at least hold on to whatever that feeling was. It was her duty, as a widow.

Tamlin felt his heart beat faster. He loved that part, the long heartfelt letter in which the brooding mortal lord explained everything to his quick-witted beloved. Of all the works that mortal writer had created, that was, by far, his favourite. Who would have thought that the Elliots had such a treasure in their house?

"Tamlin, are you in there?"

He put down the book.

"I'm here."

"Are you decent?" Allie asked from the other side of the laundry room door.

"Not quite."

He had tied a blanket around his waist to keep his ass from freezing while the house washed the blood off his clothes, and it had folded in a way that resembled the skirts Helion´s folk liked to wear.

"We have to get you some more clothes." Allie´s voice reached him on the other side of the door.

"You wouldn't happen to have another old dress, would you?" Tamlin leaned back against the cold wall of the laundry room.

"I don't think any dress of mine would have enough fabric to make you a pair of trousers."

He shrugged.

"Don't worry, I can go on doing this. It's not going to be for long anyway."

There was a moment of silence.

"Are you that eager to leave?"

Of course not. He had nowhere else to go, no one else to to talk to. If it were up to him he would stay as long as he could, but...

"Katherine is eager for me to leave, and I hate being a nuisance." He said it plain as it was, no hard feelings. Katherine had never been too enthusiastic about him staying in their house, even if she had stopped glaring at him.

"I want you to stay, and you're far from a nuisance. We hadn't had a feast like that in years, Tamlin."

A haunch of venison could hardly be called a feast.

"I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable." He crossed his arms, watching as his clothes folded over themselves in the soapy water.

"Tamlin, I know my mother. Trust me."

What was that concoction they used to make the clothes smell so damn good?

"That wouldn't be you trying to postpone talking to her, would it?"

He heard Allie slumping against the door.

"I don't know how."

He could only imagine what she was going through. Katherine looked like a loving mother, but truth was he didn't know her well enough to try to predict how she would react, and so he could offer Allie no consolation.

"Is it really so awful living with us?" Allie teased, and it made him smile.

"You know it's not."

"Then stay?"

Tamlin shook his head, not managing to wipe the smile off his face.

"When have I ever told you no?"

Allie chuckled triumphantly.

"In fact, has anyone ever told you no, kid?" He teased. Allie was as insistent as a salesman, she could make a fortune as a merchant or an emissary.

He could picture her smile turning into a mirror of Katherine´s self-assured smirk.

"It's not a concept I'm familiar with."

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So, I've decided to release these first few chapter´s as a bundle so that you guys could get a feeling of where the story is going, the next chapters should be updated periodically. I hope you're liking it so far, see you on chapter 6 3